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5 Qualities to Look for in a Guy Before Settling in a Relationship

5 Qualities to Look for in a Guy Before Settling in a Relationship

The bar is set high in our visually stimulating, Snapchatting, Tinder-swiping world. And because of that, we women have developed a reputation for being overly picky and uncommitted when it comes to the men we chose to tango with. The dating struggle truly is real.

But ladies, its time for us to be real. How many of us have written off a guy because of some foible (he over-references Star Wars) or a bad habit (like leaving the toilet seat up), when we didn’t even get a chance to see his quality? Little did you know that guy you dumped last week takes his grandma out for breakfast every Sunday,  he tutors high-school geometry for free, and even does standup comedy on the weekends. But man, leaving the toilet seat up was a deal-breaker!

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There are so many great men out there that have the qualities we really need, if only we can look past their quirks. From one imperfect and sometimes picky lady to another, these are qualities in a man you should really be looking for:

1. He is straightforward

He isn’t afraid to tell you “how it is”, and at first, this is a hard quality to come to terms with. We are so used to living in a passive-aggressive world where we shrug things off, or just say “It’s okay” and let the emotions fester. A straightforward and honest man wants to really know what’s wrong because he wants to help. Unfortunately with this comes “tough love”, because you are going to hear things that you really don’t want to here. But, in the long run its best to here it head on and deal with it.

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2. He can laugh at himself

Life is tough, and it’s even tougher if you take it too seriously. That’s why it’s important to have a co-pilot who isn’t afraid to laugh at himself when things go to hell. Why? Because fit hits the shan more often than not,  and would you rather be with Gordon Ramsay or Seth Rogen when you get in a fender bender on the way to your boyfriend’s promotion party?

3. He is generous with his time

It is a cliché, but we women like things—flowers, shoes, jewellery, chocolate. So when that Hallmark holiday rolls around we expect our man to give us these things and If he doesn’t deliver, he obviously doesn’t care about our relationship.

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This couldn’t be further from the truth!

Men who give their time rather than money are rarities. A man who will give you his attention is more precious than that Coach bag you’ve been coveting. Contrary to popular culture, being frugal with your money is important, because if you are going to be with someone for the long haul, you want to know you will be financially set. A man who values time and memories over material things is priceless.

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4. He is compassionate

One of the most powerful emotions is empathy, or the ability to comprehend and embrace someone else’s trials or jubilation. A man who can understand your sorrow but also take joy in your joy is beautiful. He always tries to put himself in other people’s shoes so he can see the world as it is, and do his best to move forth in a positive manner.

5. He learns from his mistakes

By default, we humans are all imperfect creatures and make more mistakes than we will ever admit. Given that, the best quality a man can possess is the ability to say “I was wrong” and to move forward to fix it. The greatest minds in the world and the most successful entrepreneurs have experienced failure and defeat, but instead of hiding from it, they openly embrace it. A good man will admit he is wrong, a great man will admit he is wrong and will become a better person because of it.

Featured photo credit: Affectionate young couple kissing via shutterstock.com

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Last Updated on December 2, 2018

7 Public Speaking Techniques To Help Connect With Your Audience

7 Public Speaking Techniques To Help Connect With Your Audience

When giving a presentation or speech, you have to engage your audience effectively in order to truly get your point across. Unlike a written editorial or newsletter, your speech is fleeting; once you’ve said everything you set out to say, you don’t get a second chance to have your voice heard in that specific arena.

You need to make sure your audience hangs on to every word you say, from your introduction to your wrap-up. You can do so by:

1. Connecting them with each other

Picture your typical rock concert. What’s the first thing the singer says to the crowd after jumping out on stage? “Hello (insert city name here)!” Just acknowledging that he’s coherent enough to know where he is is enough for the audience to go wild and get into the show.

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It makes each individual feel as if they’re a part of something bigger. The same goes for any public speaking event. When an audience hears, “You’re all here because you care deeply about wildlife preservation,” it gives them a sense that they’re not just there to listen, but they’re there to connect with the like-minded people all around them.

2. Connect with their emotions

Speakers always try to get their audience emotionally involved in whatever topic they’re discussing. There are a variety of ways in which to do this, such as using statistics, stories, pictures or videos that really show the importance of the topic at hand.

For example, showing pictures of the aftermath of an accident related to drunk driving will certainly send a specific message to an audience of teenagers and young adults. While doing so might be emotionally nerve-racking to the crowd, it may be necessary to get your point across and engage them fully.

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3. Keep going back to the beginning

Revisit your theme throughout your presentation. Although you should give your audience the credit they deserve and know that they can follow along, linking back to your initial thesis can act as a subconscious reminder of why what you’re currently telling them is important.

On the other hand, if you simply mention your theme or the point of your speech at the beginning and never mention it again, it gives your audience the impression that it’s not really that important.

4. Link to your audience’s motivation

After you’ve acknowledged your audience’s common interests in being present, discuss their motivation for being there. Be specific. Using the previous example, if your audience clearly cares about wildlife preservation, discuss what can be done to help save endangered species’ from extinction.

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Don’t just give them cold, hard facts; use the facts to make a point that they can use to better themselves or the world in some way.

5. Entertain them

While not all speeches or presentations are meant to be entertaining in a comedic way, audiences will become thoroughly engaged in anecdotes that relate to the overall theme of the speech. We discussed appealing to emotions, and that’s exactly what a speaker sets out to do when he tells a story from his past or that of a well-known historical figure.

Speakers usually tell more than one story in order to show that the first one they told isn’t simply an anomaly, and that whatever outcome they’re attempting to prove will consistently reoccur, given certain circumstances.

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6. Appeal to loyalty

Just like the musician mentioning the town he’s playing in will get the audience ready to rock, speakers need to appeal to their audience’s loyalty to their country, company, product or cause. Show them how important it is that they’re present and listening to your speech by making your words hit home to each individual.

In doing so, the members of your audience will feel as if you’re speaking directly to them while you’re addressing the entire crowd.

7. Tell them the benefits of the presentation

Early on in your presentation, you should tell your audience exactly what they’ll learn, and exactly how they’ll learn it. Don’t expect them to listen if they don’t have clear-cut information to listen for. On the other hand, if they know what to listen for, they’ll be more apt to stay engaged throughout your entire presentation so they don’t miss anything.

Featured photo credit: Flickr via farm4.staticflickr.com

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