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3 Easy Steps to Becoming Your Authentic Self

3 Easy Steps to Becoming Your Authentic Self

“Be a first rate version of yourself, not a second rate version of someone else.” – Judy Garland

Our roles in life don’t make us who we are. We tend to base our idea of who we are on everyday roles such as parents and spouse or even what we do in our jobs or what qualifications we have. We even go to the extent of changing our personas in different social situations & acting out of character because we think we have to. Realize that by acting in this way you are not being you at your deepest level. When you begin to use the following steps to become your authentic self you will begin to experience the benefits of a happier life.

Benefits of becoming your authentic self Include:

  • Being happier
  • Feeling of fulfilment
  • Decision making becomes easier
  • Awareness increases
  • Truthful to self & others
  • Doing things on your own terms
  • Doing what you really want
  • Doing what you love
  • Satisfying your needs
  • A sense of purpose
  • Helping you prioritize how you live
  • Being in alignment with goals & dreams

Research suggests that authentic people are well-liked, and they benefit from social support and the many other positive outcomes associated with enjoying close relationships with others.

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Your Authentic Self in 3 Easy Steps

Step 1

Choosing your values are what is important to you in life.

Knowing your values helps you understand what drives you—what you enjoy, what inspires you, and what you’d like more of. By building a life and lifestyle around our values we create a life that is more satisfying and meaningful to us.

Values change over time, and deepen as you understand yourself better.

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Finally, the values list below is only to give you some ideas of  values. We are each unique, so there will undoubtedly be words that are missing from this list, and different words that sum up your value better. If so, feel free to add those words to the list below. There are hundreds of

Sample Values List

  • Accomplishment
  • Authenticity
  • Balance
  • Beauty
  • Boldness
  • Calm
  • Community
  • Compassion
  • Confidence
  • Contribution
  • Courage
  • Creativity
  • Determination
  • Excellence
  • Freedom
  • Friendship
  • Family
  • Fun
  • Growth
  • Happiness
  • Harmony
  • Health
  • Honesty
  • Independence
  • Integrity
  • Intuition
  • Joy
  • Kindness
  • Learning
  • Listening
  • Love
  • Loyalty
  • Optimism
  • Orderliness
  • Passion
  • Patience
  • Peace
  • Productivity
  • Respect
  • Self-Esteem
  • Service
  • Simplicity
  • Spirituality
  • Strength
  • Thankfulness
  • Tradition
  • Trust
  • Understanding
  • Wisdom

Step 2

Choose up to 10 words that resonate with you and make you feel good. These are the values you want to live in your everyday life. Write them down or create a poster so you can see them every day.

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So as an example, one of my values is family: I have children, I have always spent time with and meet regularly with my extended family too, and I am also close with my cousins.

Action Plan: Ensure my children’s needs are met and that they are getting my attention by having fun time, activities together, showing my love & being there for them. As for other family members I stay in contact on a regular basis.

For me I feel this is necessary because this is who I am. I would otherwise feel frustrated and guilty if I didn’t do this. However, things may be different for you.

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Step 3

Make a list of 5 to 10 activities you love to do and 5 goals you want to achieve. Look at the work you do & look at the relationships you have. Do your values you have chosen currently align with what you want to do? If not make the necessary changes. Make a plan for how you will include your activities into your life & make steps for achieving your goals. Look out for values that are sabotaging your time and energy & live for the ones that bring out your authenticity making you happy and likely to achieve your goals. Values are not set in stone so change they may change over time.

That’s it! You will find you no longer have to fill many versions of yourself only the best one. Because by following your values you live with integrity, truth and being a happier you. Don’t let your role in life define who you are, take action to become your authentic self.

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Diana Reid

CEO - Moxie House Ltd

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Last Updated on June 19, 2019

6 Ways to Be a Successful Risk Taker and Take More Chances

6 Ways to Be a Successful Risk Taker and Take More Chances

I’ve stood on the edge of my own personal cliffs many times. Each time I jumped, something different happened. There were risks that started off great, but eventually faded. There were risks that left me falling until I hit the ground. There were risks that started slow, but built into massive successes.

Every risk is different, but every risk is the same. You need to have some fundamentals ready before you jump, but not too many.

It wouldn’t be a risk if you knew everything that was about to happen, would it? Here’re 6 ways to be a successful risk taker.

1. Understand That Failure Is Going to Happen a Lot

It’s part of life. Everything we do has failure attached to it. All successful people have stories of massive failure attached to them. Thinking that your risk is going to be pain free and run as smooth as silk is insane.

Expect some pain and failure. Actually, expect a lot of it. Expect the sleepless nights with crazy thoughts of insecurity that leave you trembling under the covers. It’s going to happen, no matter how positive you are about the risk you are about to take.

When failure hits, the only options are to keep going or quit. If you expect falling into a meadow of flowers and frolicking unicorns, then you’re going to immediately quit once you realize that getting to that meadow requires you to go through a rock filled cave filled with hungry bats.

2. Trust the Muse

Writing a story isn’t a big risk. It’s really just a risk on my time. So when I start writing a story, I’m scared it will be time wasted. Of course, it never really is. Even if the story doesn’t turn out fabulous, I still practiced.

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When I’ve taken risks in my life, the successful ones always seemed to happen when I followed the muse. Steven Pressfield describes the muse,

“The Muse demands depth. Shallow does not work for her. If we’re seeking her help, we can’t stay in the kiddie end. When we work, we have to go hard and go deep.”

The muse is a goddess who wants our attention and wants us to work on our passion.

If you’re taking a risk in anything, it’s assumed that there is some passion built up behind that risk. That passion, deep inside you, is the muse. Trust it, focus on it, listen to it.

The most successful articles and stories I write are the ones I’ve focused all my attention on. There were no interruptions during their creative development. I didn’t check my phone or go watch my Twitter feed. I was fully engaged in my work.

Trust the muse, focus your attention on your risk, let the ideas and path develop themselves, and leave the distractions at the side of the road.

3. Remember to Be Authentic

Taking a risk and then turning into something you’re not, is only going to lead to disaster. Whether you are risking a new relationship or new opportunity, you must be yourself throughout the entire process.

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How many times have you acted like you loved something just because the men or woman you just started going out with loved it?

For example, I’m not an office worker. I have an incredibly hard time working in a confined timeline (ie. 9-5). That’s why I write. I can do it whenever the mood strikes, I don’t have somebody breathing down my neck, telling me that I’m five minutes late, or missed a comma somewhere. I don’t have to walk on eggshells wondering if what I’m writing will get me fired or make me lose a promotion. I can just be myself, period.

One girlfriend didn’t understand that. She believed solely in the 9-5 motto, specifically something in human resources because that was a very stable job. I was scared for my future, but I stuck with the relationship because of my own insecurities and acted like I would do it to make her happy.

Here’s a tip: NEVER take away from your happiness to make somebody else satisfied (note I didn’t say happy).

Making somebody else happy will make you happy. Doing something to satisfy somebody is murder on your soul.

4. Don’t Take Any Risks While You’re Not Clearheaded

I’d been considering the risk for a couple weeks. It all sounded good. I was 22 and I could be rich in a couple of years. That’s what they were selling me, anyways.

One night, while at a house party with some friends, I found myself at a computer. A couple of my friends were standing nearby and asked me what I was doing. I told them I was considering starting my own business and it was only going to cost me $1,500.

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Of course, when a bunch of drunk people are surrounded by more drunk people, things get enthusiastic. It sounded like the best business venture in the world to everybody, including me. So I signed up and gave them my credit card number.

A few painful months and close to $4,000 dollars lost later, I quit the business. I was young and fell into the pyramid scheme trap. It was an expensive drunk decision.

Drinking heavily and making decisions has a proven track record of failure. So when you have something important to decide, don’t let your emotions take over your brain.

5. Fully Understand What You’re Risking

It was the start of my baseball comeback. I got a tryout with a professional scout and killed it. After the tryout, he talked to my girlfriend and myself, making sure we understood I would be gone for up to 6 months at a time. That strain on the relationship could be tough.

We understood. I left to play ball, chose to stay in the city I played in, and a year later we broke up. Not because of baseball, see point 3 above. Taking big risks can have massive impacts on everything in your life from relationships to money. Know what you’re risking before you take the risk.

If you believe the risk will be worth it or you have the support you need from your family, then go ahead and make the leap.

You can get more guidance on how to take calculated risks from this article: How to Take Calculated Risk to Achieve More and Become Successful

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6. Remember This Is Your One Shot Only

As far as we know officially, this is our one shot at life, so why not take some risks?

The top thing people are saddened by on their deathbeds are these regrets. They wish they did more, asked that girl in the coffee shop out, spoke out when they should have, or did what they were passionate about.

Don’t regret. Learn and experience. Live. Take the risks you believe in. Be yourself and make the world a better place.

Now go ahead, take that risk and be successful at it!

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Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

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