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25 Habits of Highly Sensitive People

25 Habits of Highly Sensitive People

Highly sensitive people can often be seen as weak, but that’s not the case. More often than not, they are stronger than the average human being, and have the capability of letting their protective walls down when building personal and professional relationships. Developing a relationship with someone who is highly sensitive can help you become more in touch with your own feelings  as well as help you see life’s messages that you may be missing. It may take patience to understand the inner thoughts of a highly sensitive person however you should feel honored that they are choosing you to be a part of their life.

1. They think with their heart

They follow their heart’s desire with ease when it comes to thinking ideas through. However, this can become a problem when they leap off the deep end without considering the logistics of a situation.  

2. They talk everything out

They need to express their thoughts and feelings freely about everything, in order to feel heard and appreciated. Ironically, highly sensitive people can sometimes have a hard time listening to advice from others due to their sensitivity to words, and can often be offended if the wrong words are used during conversation.

3. They don’t rush through life

They know how to enjoy life’s moments by taking their time with everything they do. The pressure they may sometimes feel from others to hurry along, only adds stress on the relationship at hand, and not the trust that they require. Highly sensitive people enjoy taking in the scenery, and strive to keep stress to a minimum.  

4. They appreciate time alone

With being so sensitive, it’s important for highly sensitive people to have time alone to decompress. Its amazing how quickly they can absorb any and all negative energy from the people in which surround them.  

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5. They strive to only do good

They truly want to do great things in this world and put their whole hearts into whatever it is that they are doing. However, they are easily discouraged when the great things they are working on don’t shape up as they had envisioned. Such as an unappreciated homemade gift, and/or gestures.  

6. They pay attention to details

They can sometimes over think details to a point of driving everyone around them mad, but their observations usually payoff greatly. They naturally pay attention to the body language and emotions of everyone and everything around them. From nature, to animals, and people, they can predict something is not on point before it’s even been revealed. Such as someone lying about something, a sickness someone may be carrying, a pregnancy, a job promotion, or even a natural disaster!  

7. They can give great advice

People who are highly sensitive are great at analyzing situations and offering up the best advice. They love feeling needed and can struggle when that great advise that they had given is not put to good use.  

8. They display a tough exterior

Sensitive people tend to display a strong exterior with a stiff upper lip, and can be unknowingly mad at you for months. They may be hurt by something extremely small that you did or said, and will sometimes hold onto it to instead of expressing it, to avoid jeopardizing the chance of hurting you back. They recognize that it’s something they need to work on because of their high sensitivity, not something for you to deal with.  

9. They know their worth

Sensitive people know when they are not being valued, and have the strength to walk away from any toxic situation. Others may not understand their reasoning looking at the whole picture, but the build up of bad habits in any given relationship will have them naturally walking away in search for greener pastures.  

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10. They are well mannered and polite

You can pretty much always expect a highly sensitive person to be aware of their surrounds by showcasing their expert manners. In return, they expect the same politeness and well-mannered behaviors from others, and may see you as rude if you don’t.  

11. They are passionate

Whether it’s with their family, their friends, their love interest, or even their career, passion never falls short in their day-to-day lives. Sometimes if the energy is not reciprocated back to them, they can be become hard on the people they are putting so much energy into. With their passionate personalities on the line, they thrive on appreciation from others.

12. They are spiritual

They believe in karma and how everything happens for a reason. They believe that the universe works in a particular way to always make full circle. They like to live a life in harmony, even though they tend to struggle to find it internally. Highly sensitive people are likely to try activities such as meditation and yoga, at least once in their life, in search for that higher connection with their body and mind.  

13. They have strong intuitions

They usually know something is going to happen before hand. Sometimes this may initially come across as if they are accusing or blaming, when in fact they just want to express and advise others of what they are feel may happen, and soon.  

14. They trust their body

When making big life decisions like signing a legal binding contract, their body may alarm them that something is not right. To some this may seem frustrating, but they have learned from experience to trust their body when something doesn’t feel right.

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15. They are empathic towards others

They can always put the shoe on the other foot, and understand what it must be like for someone else to go through certain struggles in life. This habit really plays a role when there’s an argument at hand, because it doesn’t take highly sensitive people long to see their self inside of someone else’s problem and instantly want to help or lend a hand. However, they sense too often that people do not replicate this emotion, which can sometimes reactive their initial anger.

16. They are compassionate towards others

They can truly hold concern for other people when they see others in a difficult situation. A highly sensitive person doesn’t need to know the person in harms way on a personal level, but can instantly feel compassion for the child who just fell off their bike, the shop owner who was just robbed, or even the character from a movie who just had their heart broken.  

17. They put others before themselves

They sometimes get so wrapped up in the needs of other people, they can forget about their self. However, it’s a hard pill for them to swallow when they feel unappreciated for their effort and time. Not that they only help others for recognition, but a simple, “Thank you” will keep a highly sensitive person pleased.  

18. They read people well

Within moments of meeting someone for the first time, they can gather a very accurate story of who a person really is. As time unravels, a highly sensitive person can surprise people with fun facts, which the person didn’t even realize about their self.  

19. They love animals

They have a special bond with animals in whereby animals trust them completely. Not only do highly sensitive people appreciate the mutual respect that animals give without conditions, they are also sensitive to the needs and wants of each and every animal, and make a point to pay extra attention to all forms of communication they animal may or may not be giving.  

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20. They ask a lot of questions

In order to make sense of the world, they ask a lot of questions. Sometimes these questions can get them in trouble when they get too political or emotionally deep, but the questions they ask always leave us thinking in a positive light.  

21. They make very calculated decisions

Highly sensitive people naturally think with their hearts, they make decisions based on the details of their emotions. They usually ask them-selves many internal questions like, “Why do I feel this way?”. Their decision-making is almost as calculated as a game of chest, and everything needs to have a reason and purpose before the next move is made.  

22. They gain satisfaction with decision-making

They love knowing that their strategic planning paid off in the end, which it usually does. However when it doesn’t, they can be extremely hard on themselves with self-doubt.  

23. They are problem solvers

They may be highly sensitive but they are not ones for thinking linearly. They hold many emotions, and this drives their many ways of thinking out solutions to their problems. Highly sensitive people like to map out all possibilities in order to solve each problem as best, as they know how and then execute!  

24. They stand up for what they feel is right

When they have a thought, a vision, an idea, or a feeling, they will voice it, even if they may be standing alone. However, they can sometimes feel as if they are too different from the rest of the world and become disheartened at times, when they see how insensitive some people can really be.  

25. They can admit when they are wrong

Highly sensitive people know how important it is to be recognized for the things that they do correctly. Therefore, it’s easy for them to admit their mistakes and give credit to others who deserve it by saying, “I’m sorry, you are right.”

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Published on September 23, 2020

6 Effective Negotiation Skills to Master

6 Effective Negotiation Skills to Master

I don’t know about you, but many times when I hear the word negotiate I think of lawyers working out a business deal or having to do battle with a car salesman to try to get a lower price. Since I am in recruiting, the term “negotiation” comes up when someone is attempting to get a higher compensation package.

If we think about it, we tend to negotiate almost every day in a wide variety of things we do. Getting a handle on the important negotiation skills can be incredibly beneficial in many parts of our lives. Let’s take a look at 6 effective negotiation skills to master.

What is Negotiation?

First, let’s take a look at what negotiation is. Put simply, negotiation is a method by which people settle their differences. It is a process in which compromise or agreement can be reached without argument or dispute.

Anytime two people or sides disagree on something, they are almost always looking for the best possible outcome for their side. This could be from an individual’s perspective or someone representing an organization.

In reality, it’s rare that one side gets everything they want and the other side gets nothing that they are seeking. Seeking to reach a common ground of sorts where both sides feel like they are getting most of what they want is the key to being successful and maintaining the relationship.

Places We Negotiate

I’ve mentioned that we negotiate in just about all phases of our life. For those of you who are shaking your head no, I invite you to think about the following:

1. Work/Business

This one is the most obvious and it’s what naturally comes to mind when we think of the word “negotiate”.

When you first started at your current job, you might have asked for a higher salary. It could be that you delivered a huge new client to your company and used this as leverage in your most recent evaluation for more compensation. If you work with vendors (and just about every company does), maybe you worked them to a lower price or better contract terms.

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In recruiting, I negotiate with candidates and hiring managers all the time to land the best talent I can find. It’s very common to accept additional work with the (sometimes spoken, sometimes unspoken) agreement that it will benefit your career in the future.

Recently, I took over a project that was my boss was working on so that I would be able to attend a conference later in the year. And so it goes, we do this all day long at work.

2. Personal

I don’t know about you, but I negotiate with my spouse all the time. I’ll cook dinner with the understanding that she does the dishes. Who wants to mow the lawn and who wants to vacuum and dust the house?

I think we should save 10% for retirement, but she thinks 5% is plenty. Therefore, we save 8%. And don’t even get me started with my kids. My older daughter can borrow my car as soon as she finishes her chores. My younger daughter can go hang out with her friends when her homework is done.

Then, there are all those interactions in our personal lives outside our homes. The carpenter wants to charge me $12,000 to build a new deck. I think $10,000 is plenty so we agree on $11,000. I ask my neighbor if I can borrow his snowblower in the winter if I invite him over the next time I grill steak. And so on.

3. Ourselves

You didn’t expect this one, did you? We negotiate with ourselves all day long.

I’ll make sure I don’t skip my workout tomorrow since I’m going to have that extra piece of pizza. My spouse has been quiet the last few days, is it worth me asking her about, or should I leave it alone? I think the car place charged me for some repairs that weren’t needed, should I say something or just let it go? I know my friend has been having some personal challenges, should I check in with him? We’ve been friends for a long time, I’m sure he’d come to me if he needed help. I’ve got the #4 pick in this year’s Fantasy Football draft, should I choose a running back or a wide receiver?

Think about that non-stop voice inside your head. It always seems to be chattering away about something and many times, it’s us negotiating with ourselves. I’ll finish up that report that the boss needs before I turn on the football game.

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Why Negotiation Skills Are So Important

Put simply, negotiation skills are important because we all interact with other people, and not only other people but other organizations and groups of people as well.

We all rarely want the same thing or outcome. Most of the time a vendor is looking at getting you to pay a higher price for something than you want to spend. Therefore, it’s important to negotiate to some middle ground that works well for both sides.

My wife and I disagree on how much to save for retirement. If we weren’t married it wouldn’t be an issue. We’d each contribute how much we wanted to on our retirement funds. We choose to be married, so we have to come to some agreement that we both feel comfortable with. We have to compromise. Therefore, we have to negotiate.

If we each lived on a planet by ourselves, we would be free to do just about anything we wanted to. We wouldn’t have to compromise with anyone because we wouldn’t interact with anyone. We would make every choice unilaterally the way we wanted to.

As we all know, this isn’t how things are. We are constantly interacting with other people and organizations, each one with their own agenda’s, viewpoints, and opinions. Therefore, we have to be able to work together.

6 Negotiation Skills to Master

Having strong negotiation skills helps us create win-win situations with others, allowing us to get most of what we want in conjunction with others around us.

Now, let’s look at 6 effective negotiation skills to master.

1. Preparation

Preparation is a key place to start with when getting ready to negotiate. Being prepared means having a clear vision of what you want and how you’d go about achieving it. It means knowing what the end goal looks like and also what you are willing to give to get it.

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It also means knowing who you are negotiating with and what areas they might be willing to compromise on. You should also know what your “bottom line” is. By “bottom line” I mean what is the most you are willing to give up to get what you want.

For instance, several years ago, I decided it was time to get a newer car. I say newer because I wanted a “new to me” car, not a brand new car. I did my research and figured out what type of car I wanted. I decided on what must-have items on the car I wanted, the highest amount of miles that would already be on it, the colors I was willing to get it in, and the highest amount of money I was willing to pay.

After visiting numerous car dealerships I was able to negotiate buying a car. I knew what I was willing to give up (amount of money) and what I was willing to accept, things like the color, amount of miles, etc. I came prepared. This is critical.

2. Clear Communication

The next key skill you need to be an effective negotiator is clear communication. You have to be able to clearly articulate what you want to the other party. This means both clear verbal and written communication.

If you can’t clearly tell the other person what you want, how do you expect to get it? Have you ever worked through something with a vendor or someone else only to learn of a surprise right at the end that wasn’t talked about before? This is not what you would call clear communication. It’s essential to be able to share a coherent and logical vision with the person you are working with.

3. Active Listening

Let’s do a quick review of active listening. This is when you are completely focused on the speaker, understand their message, comprehend the information, and respond appropriately. This is a necessary ingredient to be able to negotiate successfully. You must be able to fully focus on the other person’s wants to completely understand them.

If you aren’t giving them your full attention, you may miss some major points or details. This leads to frustration down the road on both sides. Ensure you are employing your active listening skills when in arbitration mode.

4. Teamwork and Collaboration

To be able to get to a place of common ground and a win-win scenario, you have to have a sense of teamwork and collaboration.

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If you are only thinking about yourself and what you want without giving much care to what the other person is wanting, you are bound to wind up without a solution. The other person may get frustrated and give up if they see you are unwilling to meet them halfway or care little for what they want.

When you collaborate, you are working together to help each other get what is most important to you. The other upside to negotiating with a sense of teamwork and collaboration is that it helps create a sense of trust, which, in turn, helps provide positive energy for working to a successful conclusion.

5. Problem Solving

Problem-solving is another key negotiation skill. When you are working with the other person to get the deal done many times you’ll face new challenges along the way.

Maybe you want a new vendor to provide training on the software they are selling you but they say it’s going to cost an additional $20,000 to provide this service. If you don’t have the additional $20,000 in the budget to spend on the software but you feel the training is critical, how are you going to solve that problem?

From what I’ve seen, most vendors aren’t willing to provide additional services without getting paid for them. This is where problem-solving skills will help continue the discussions. You might suggest to the vendor that your company will also be looking to replace their financial software next year, and you’d be happy to ensure they get one of the first seats at the table when the time comes if they could perhaps lower the pricing on their training.

There’s a solution to most challenges, but it takes problem-solving skills to work through them effectively.

6. Decision-Making Ability

Finally, having strong decision-making ability will help you seal the deal when you get to a place where everyone feels like they are getting what works for them. Each step of the way you can cross off the list when you get what you are looking for and decide to move onto the next item. Then, once you have all of your must-have boxes checked and the other side feels good about things, it’s time to shake hands and sign on the dotted line. Powerful decision-making ability will help you get to the finish line together.

Conclusion

There you have it, 6 effective negotiation skills to master to lead a more fulfilling life. Once we realize that we negotiate in one form or another almost every day in every phase of our lives, we realize how critical a skill it is.

Possessing strong negotiation skills will help you in nearly every one of your relationships at both the workplace and in your personal life. If you feel your arbitration tools could use some sharpening, try some of the 6 effective negotiation skills to master that we’ve talked about.

More Tips to Improve Your Negotiation Skills

Featured photo credit: Windows via unsplash.com

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