“All that I am, and ever hope to be, I owe to my angel mother”
We sometimes take advantage of our mothers’ presence in our lives and forget to thank them for the little things they do and have done to help us grow into who we are today. They encourage us, help us, cry with us, laugh with us and sometimes, we just forget that a simple thank you can go a long way. So here it is—here’s to all you mothers out there! Thank you for being you!
1. Thank you for doing my laundry before I knew how.
Thank you Mom, for making sure I had clean clothes to wear each day free from grass, food and blood stains. Thanks for waking up at 6 a.m. to make sure all of the laundry got done in time for breakfast.
2. Thank you for making my meals, all of them.
Thank you for waking up each day to make breakfast and also my lunch before school. Thank you for having a snack ready for after school and then preparing dinner.Advertising
3. Thank you for teaching me to see the best in people.
Thank you for being there to show me that there is good in everyone and to see the silver lining in every situation.
4. Thank you for being selfless.
Thank you for giving up everything you want so that I could have the world. You sacrifices are appreciated. That time you wanted to just relax after work, but I needed help on a school project will not be forgotten.
5. Thank you for making sure I checked in when I went out with friends.
Thank you for teaching me to eventually be responsible and check in with you so that you know I am still alive.
6. Thank you for dealing with my case of the Mondays even though Monday was five days ago.
This is basically for the mood swings that you had to endure as I went through my teenage years. The mood swings, the yelling, the sobbing, the “I HATE YOU”s are not easy things to put up with and I am thankful you did.
7. Thank you for doing your job as a mom all year round, in addition to your actual job.
Thank you for waking up in the middle of the night to find my cold medicine and clean up barf and checking for ghosts underneath my bed. I know sleep is precious to you, but you got up anyways.Advertising
8. Thank you for teaching me how to handle money.
Thank you for the allowance and not giving me a penny more. It taught me the value of money and to get the thought that “everything is free” out of my head.
9. Thank you for forgiving me even though I hurt your feelings.
Thank you for having thick skin when I said hurtful things and still doing your motherly duties. I know you could have just let me starve or find a way to school after a stupid fight but you packed my lunch and drove me anyways.
10. Thank you for teaching me how to handle conflict.
Thank you for showing me to keep quiet on not act out on my emotions and say things I don’t mean. Thank you also for teaching me how to speak up and stand up for what I believe in.
11. Thank you for making sure I used my manners.
Thank you for making me say “please” and “thank you” to everyone and use my manners. Now I understand how awful it looks when people don’t use their manners and I am glad you made sure I did.
12. Thank you for helping me with my homework.
Thank you for helping me (forcing me to) do my homework. It helped in school (even if I don’t want to admit it).Advertising
13. Thank you for teaching me the importance of hygiene.
Thank you for teaching me how to be a clean person because, well, everyone likes a clean person.
14. Thank you for the gift of persistence.
Thank you for teaching me to keep at something if I want to get better at it and keep doing it. I understand now that great things take time and effort.
15. Thank you for the thick skin and teaching the meaning of the word “fair.”
Thank you for teaching me that not everything is just going to magically turn out in my favor or go my way. It taught me to work for what I want and not be self entitled.
16. Thank you for tucking me in at night.
Thank you for helping me sleep better by tucking me in at night. Now I realize that not everyone is that lucky to have someone to do that for them and I did.
17. Thank you for teaching me patience.
Thank you for teaching me how to wait and be patient because in life, that is all you can do at times.Advertising
18. Thank you for all the answers and for teaching me to keep asking questions.
Thank you for answering all my why’s, how’s, who’s and what’s. Thank you also for teaching me to continue to keep asking questions because knowledge is an amazing tool to have in your tool box and you can’t know unless you ask.
19. Thank you for your friendship.
Thank you for being my assigned friend. You are there when I feel up, down, confused and just plain angry. Thank you for being my best friend, even though it took me several years to see you as that.
20. Thank you for the laughter.
Thank you for all the laughter you have provided me from my childhood up until this day and making sure I had the opportunity to laugh.
21. Thank you for letting me worry about irrelevant things.
Thank you for letting me sob about prom, an old boyfriend (of two weeks), not being able to go out past ten and not seeing rated R movies. Thank you for letting me be a teenager and not forcing me to grow up too fast.
22. Thank you for teaching me to always be myself.
Thank you for letting me know it is okay to be myself. You taught me that it is okay to be happy with who I am and to only better myself if I wanted. Thank you also for the drive and the want to better myself.
23. Thank you for teaching me family is important.
Thank you for always having open arms no matter what was going on and teaching me the meaning of unconditional love. You are the reason I am who I am today and have taught me that family will always be there for you.
Featured photo credit: Maternity- Sara K Byrne via flickr.com
Last Updated on May 21, 2019
How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship
For all our social media bravado, we live in a society where communication is seen less as an art, and more as a perfunctory exercise. We spend so much time with people, yet we struggle with how to meaningfully communicate.
If you believe you have mastered effective communication, scan the list below and see whether you can see yourself in any of the examples:
You are uncomfortable with a person’s actions or comments, and rather than telling the individual immediately, you sidestep the issue and attempt to move on as though the offending behavior or comment never happened.
You move on with the relationship and develop a pattern of not addressing challenging situations. Before long, the person with whom you are in relationship will say or do something that pushes you over the top and predictably, you explode or withdraw completely from the relationship.
In this example, hard-to-speak truths become never- expressed truths that turn into resentment and anger.
You communicate from the head and without emotion. While what you communicate makes perfect sense to you, it comes across as cold because it lacks emotion.
People do not understand what motivates you to say what you say, and without sharing your feelings and emotions, others experience you as rude, cold or aggressive.
You will know this is a problem if people shy away from you, ignore your contributions in meetings or tell you your words hurt. You can also know you struggle in this area if you find yourself constantly apologizing for things you have said.
You have an issue with one person, but you communicate your problem to an entirely different person.
The person in whom you confide lacks the authority to resolve the matter troubling you, and while you have vented and expressed frustration, the underlying challenge is unresolved.
You grew up in a family with destructive communication habits and those habits play out in your current relationships.
Because you have never stopped to ask why you communicate the way you do and whether your communication style still works, you may lack understanding of how your words impact others and how to implement positive change.
If you find yourself in any of the situations described above, this article is for you.
Communication can build or decimate worlds and it is important we get it right. Regardless of your professional aspirations or personal goals, you can improve your communication skills if you:
- Understand your own communication style
- Tailor your style depending on the needs of the audience
- Communicate with precision and care
- Be mindful of your delivery, timing and messenger
1. Understand Your Communication Style
To communicate effectively, you must understand the communication legacy passed down from our parents, grandparents or caregivers. Each of us grew up with spoken and unspoken rules about communication.
In some families, direct communication is practiced and honored. In other families, family members are encouraged to shy away from difficult conversations. Some families appreciate open and frank dialogue and others do not. Other families practice silence about substantive matters, that is, they seldom or rarely broach difficult conversations at all.
Before you can appreciate the nuance required in communication, it helps to know the familial patterns you grew up with.
2. Learn Others Communication Styles
Communicating effectively requires you to take a step back, assess the intended recipient of your communication and think through how the individual prefers to be communicated with. Once you know this, you can tailor your message in a way that increases the likelihood of being heard. This also prevents you from assuming the way you communicate with one group is appropriate or right for all groups or people.
If you are unsure how to determine the styles of the groups or persons with whom you are interacting, you can always ask them:
“How do you prefer to receive information?”
This approach requires listening, both to what the individuals say as well as what is unspoken. Virgin Group CEO Richard Branson noted that the best communicators are also great listeners.
To communicate effectively from relationship to relationship and situation to situation, you must understand the communication needs of others.
3. Exercise Precision and Care
A recent engagement underscored for me the importance of exercising care when communicating.
On a recent trip to Ohio, I decided to meet up with an old friend to go for a walk. As we strolled through the soccer park, my friend gently announced that he had something to talk about, he was upset with me. His introduction to the problem allowed me to mentally shift gears and prepare for the conversation.
Shortly after introducing the shift in conversation, my friend asked me why I didn’t invite him to the launch party for my business. He lives in Ohio and I live in the D.C. area.
I explained that the event snuck up on me, and I only started planning the invite list three weeks before the event. Due to the last-minute nature of the gathering, I opted to invite people in the DMV area versus my friends from outside the area – I didn’t want to be disrespectful by asking them to travel on such short notice.
I also noted that I didn’t want to be disappointed if he and others declined to come to the event. So I played it safe in terms of inviting people who were local.
In the moment, I felt the conversation went very well. I also checked in with my friend a few days after our walk, affirmed my appreciation for his willingness to communicate his upset and our ability to work through it.
The way this conversation unfolded exemplified effective communication. My friend approached me with grace and vulnerability. He approached me with a level of curiosity that didn’t put me on my heels — I was able to really listen to what he was saying, apologize for how my decision impacted him and vow that going forward, I would always ask rather than making decisions for him and others.
Our relationship is intact, and I now have information that will help me become a better friend to him and others.
4. Be Mindful of Delivery, Timing and Messenger
Communicating effectively also requires thinking through the delivery of the message one intends to communicate as well as the appropriate time for the discussion.
In an Entrepreneur.com column, VIP Contributor Deep Patel, noted that persons interested in communicating well need to master the art of timing. Patel noted,
“Great comedians, like all great communicators, are able to feel out their audience to determine when to move on to a new topic or when to reiterate an idea.”
Communicating effectively also requires thoughtfulness about the messenger. A person prone to dramatic, angry outbursts should never be called upon to deliver constructive feedback, especially to people whom they do not know. The immediate aftermath of a mass shooting is not the ideal time to talk about the importance of the Second Amendment rights.
Like everyone else, I must work to ensure my communication is layered with precision and care.
It requires precision because words must be carefully tailored to the person with whom you are speaking.
It requires intentionality because before one communicates, one should think about the audience and what the audience needs in order to hear your message the way you intended it to be communicated.
It requires active listening which is about hearing verbal and nonverbal messages.
Even though we may be right in what we say, how we say it could derail the impact of the message and the other parties’ ability to hear the message.
Communicating with care is also about saying things that the people in our life need to hear and doing so with love.
The Bottom Line
When I left the meeting with my dear friend, I wondered if I was replicating or modeling this level of openness and transparency in the rest of my relationships.
I was intrigued and appreciative. He’d clearly thought about what he wanted to say to me, picked the appropriate time to share his feedback and then delivered it with care. He hit the ball out of the park and I’m hopeful we all do the same.
More Articles About Effective Communication
- Conflict Management Styles for Effective Communication at Work
- 13 Best Communication Books for Stronger Social Skills & Relationships
- How to Master Effective Communication Skills at Work and Home
- 7 Most Important Communication Techniques to Master in the Workplace
Featured photo credit: Kenan Buhic via unsplash.com
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