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20 Things You Should Know Before Dating A Social Butterfly

20 Things You Should Know Before Dating A Social Butterfly

Social butterflies are a really special species. Dating one will require a level of tolerance not many people have, so if there’s someone you really like, prepare yourself to moving your limits. They live in a world of their own where being an extrovert and an introvert is possible at the same time; they have a lot of friends, but they aren’t close with anybody really; they date a lot, but usually don’t have a single relationship that lasted more than three months; and they tend to have a lot of talents, but not one of those are fully developed, except perhaps their social skills. Dating a social butterfly will get you way out of your comfort zone, so you need to brace yourself and do your homework.

1. They always hang out with a bunch of people

You can’t really expect from a social butterfly to devote their full attention to you, at least not in the beginning of your relationship. You really can’t get mad at them because they are surrounded by a lot of different people 24/7. Their attention needs to be deserved.

2. They like to be in the spotlight

You’ll easily be able to recognize a social butterfly if you just pay attention to which person is the center of a social group. They would do and say practically anything to be noted, so prepare yourself for the unexpected.

3. They change their mind quite often

In order to understand how they tick, pay attention to the way they plan their day – they tend to keep all of their options open until they are proposed with something they really like. So, if you don’t find what they say reliable, have in mind that their plans change by the minute.

4. They expect from everyone to have social skills

Dating a social butterfly usually means you’re on your own, and this doesn’t mean they don’t care – they just don’t realize that not everyone has social skills. That lack of empathy isn’t something they do on purpose; they just don’t realize what it’s like to be uncomfortable when surrounded with a lot of unfamiliar people. If you’re determined to really put an effort into this relationship, it’s probably time to learn how to develop your social skills.

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5. They tend to be irresponsible

Considering the fact that even they don’t really know what kind of obligations they have during the day, a real responsibility can easily slip from their mind. You can’t really expect from a social butterfly to have a serious career, because they are already devoted to maintaining a certain lifestyle – the show must go on!

6. They are extraordinarily spontaneous

If your life was steady and quite until now, prepare yourself for a major lifestyle change. There’s no point in trying to resist them, and if you just go with the flow, you’ll have a lot – and I mean a lot – of stories to tell.

7. They like to experiment with everything

Whether it’s about fashion, haircuts, gadgets, music or jobs, be sure they either tried it or they plan on trying it. And, social butterflies will push whatever they are experimenting with – at least until they become good at it, because then it becomes boring.

8. They will expect from you to appreciate their sense of humor

You two can’t really work if you don’t laugh at a social butterfly’s jokes. It’s important to understand that they live of feeding with laughs. When you get there, it will be pretty simple, especially because they are usually hilarious.

9. They have occasional depressions

With so many different things happening in their lives, they occasionally get tired. When that happens, they feel alone, and that is when waves of depressions come along. It’s probably best to give them space and let them fight it – you can be positive that this isn’t the first time in a social butterfly’s life when they are struggling with who they actually are. However, if you notice that they have more than just a few signs of depression, you should jump right in and do your best to help.

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10. They tend to be artistic

One of more than just a few talents they poses will be related to at least one form of art, you can be sure of that. Considering the fact they have a lot of experience in completely different areas, it’s natural they have a need to express it someway.

11. They are great adventurists

Social butterflies tend to consider their lives to be a real life movie, with a theme song and everything. So, if you get neglected because of something you think is less important, believe me, they don’t look at things from your angle, because they’ll leave everything for an exciting adventure.

12. They need support even though they appear to be really confident

All of these characteristics create a strong figure that’s daring and confident, but that’s not the whole truth. The greatest bond you can make with a social butterfly is through support, so make sure you show a lot of it, even though you sometimes consider it isn’t necessary.

13. They have a really busy schedule

One day of a social butterfly is equal to several days of a regular person – they get up early and they stay out really late. Scheduling a date with them may sometimes feel like making an appointment with your dentist, but that’s just another part of their personality.

14. They have a big ego

You need to be very, very careful when you want to criticize a social butterfly. If you strike a nerve that’s not to be touched, you can expect not to get your calls answered for a couple of days. However, if you’re lucky to hear from them, they will undoubtedly hold a grudge and expect an apology.

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15. They have a lot of expectations from the person they date

When dating a social butterfly, you need to be able to understand everything they do without too much talking. And not only that, be sure they’ll expect from you to be resourceful, cunning and prepared for whatever they have prepared for you.

16. They have no regards for the consequences

If each day of your life was filled with various happenings and unexpected turns of events, I’m sure you wouldn’t have enough time to think things through fully either. They are more in a deal-with-consequences-when-they-arrive kind of mood, than comes planning and being responsible.

17. They have a lot of different interests

It can be impossible to keep track of everything a social butterfly likes. Also, you may be surprised with how contradictory their interests may be – football and tango, reading and developing apps, photography and philosophy – practically anything goes.

18. They like to enjoy various privileges

Every social butterfly enjoys demonstrating their influence, but they do it subtly. For example, they always have a table waiting for them in a bar, they are asked to cut long lines and they can ask for favors in the strangest places. Pretty cool, huh?

19. They take their appearance seriously

Don’t get surprised when you find out how much time your social butterfly spends in front of the mirror or in the gym. The world is their stage, so if you’re not a fashionista, it’s definitely time to learn about different styles and how to pull them off, without spending a small fortune in order to look good all the time.

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20. They are dangerously easy to fall in love with

You need to be really careful, because they are capable of sweeping you off your feet without even being aware of that fact. Take things slow, try not to get too attached and your relationship have real chances to actually work.

I hope you’ll find my pointers insightful, and that they will get you closer to understanding what a social butterfly is all about. It will take some serious effort and a lot of devotion, but if you think you can handle it, it will all be worth it. Good luck!

Featured photo credit: Young vintage hipster pretty couple having fun outdoor in summer on the street in city with cool bicycle behind white wall. Man with girl in spring urban style via shutterstock.com

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Last Updated on July 16, 2019

7 Ways to Get Rid of Negative Energy and Become Positive

7 Ways to Get Rid of Negative Energy and Become Positive

Negativity affects ourselves and everyone around us. It limits our potential to become something great and live a fulfilling, purposeful life. Negativity has a tangible effect on our health, too. Research has shown that people who cultivate negative energy experience more stress, more sickness, and less opportunity over the course of their lives than those who choose to live positively.

When we make a decision to become positive, and follow that decision up with action, we will begin to encounter situations and people that are also positive. The negative energy gets edged out by all positive experiences. It’s a snowball effect.

Although negative and positive thoughts will always exist, the key to becoming positive is to limit the amount of negativity that we experience by filling ourselves up with more positivity.

Here are some ways to get rid of negativity and become more positive.

1. Become Grateful for Everything

When life is all about us, it’s easy to believe that we deserve what we have. An attitude of entitlement puts us at the center of the universe and sets up the unrealistic expectation that others should cater to us, our needs, and our wants. This vain state of existence is a surefire way to set yourself up for an unfulfilled life of negativity.

People living in this sort of entitlement are “energy suckers”–they are always searching for what they can get out of a situation. People that don’t appreciate the nuances of their lives live in a constant state of lacking. And it’s really difficult to live a positive life this way.

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When we begin to be grateful and appreciate everything in our lives–from the small struggles that make us better, to the car that gets us from A to B every day–we shift our attitude from one of selfishness, to one of appreciation. This appreciation gets noticed by others, and a positive harmony begins to form in our relationships.

We begin to receive more of that which we are grateful for, because we’ve opened ourselves up to the idea of receiving, instead of taking. This will make your life more fulfilling, and more positive.

2. Laugh More, Especially at Yourself

Life gets busy, our schedules fill up, we get into relationships, and work can feel task oriented and routine-driven at times. Being human can feel more like being a robot. But having this work-driven, serious attitude often results in negative and performance oriented thinking.

Becoming positive means taking life less seriously and letting yourself off the hook. This is the only life that you get to live, why not lighten up your mood?

Laughter helps us become positive by lightening our mood and reminding us not to take life so seriously. Are you sensitive to light sarcasm? Do you have trouble laughing at jokes? Usually, people who are stressed out and overly serious get most offended by sarcasm because their life is all work and no play.

If we can learn to laugh at ourselves and our mistakes, life will become more of an experiment in finding out what makes us happy. And finding happiness means finding positivity.

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3. Help Others

Negativity goes hand in hand with selfishness. People that live only for themselves have no higher purpose in their lives. If the whole point of this world is only to take care of yourself and no one else, the road to a long-term fulfillment and purpose is going to be a long one.

Positivity accompanies purpose. The most basic way to create purpose and positivity in your life is to begin doing things for others. Start small; open the door for the person in front of you at Starbucks or ask someone how their day was before telling them about yours.

Helping others will give you an intangible sense of value that will translate into positivity. And people might just appreciate you in the process.

4. Change Your Thinking

We can either be our best coach or our best enemy. Change starts from within. If you want to become more positive, change the wording of your thoughts. We are the hardest on ourselves, and a stream of negative self talk is corrosive to a positive life.

The next time you have a negative thought, write it down and rephrase it with a positive spin. For example, change a thought like, “I can’t believe I did so horribly on the test–I suck.” to “I didn’t do as well as I hoped to on this test. But I know I’m capable and I’ll do better next time.”

Changing our self-talk is powerful.

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5. Surround Yourself with Positive People

We become most like the people that we surround ourselves with. If our friend group is full of negative energy-suckers and drama queens, we will emulate that behavior and become like them. It is very difficult to become more positive when the people around us don’t support or demonstrate positive behavior.

As you become more positive, you’ll find that your existing friends will either appreciate the new you or they will become resistant to your positive changes. This is a natural response.

Change is scary; but cutting out the negative people in your life is a huge step to becoming more positive. Positive people reflect and bounce their perspectives onto one another. Positivity is a step-by-step process when you do it solo, but a positive group of friends can be an escalator.

6. Get into Action

Negative thoughts can be overwhelming and challenging to navigate. Negativity is usually accompanied by a “freak-out” response, especially when tied to relationships, people and to worrying about the future. This is debilitating to becoming positive and usually snowballs into more worry, more stress and more freak-outs.

Turn the negative stress into positive action. The next time you’re in one of these situations, walk away and take a break. With your eyes closed, take a few deep breaths. Once you’re calm, approach the situation or problem with a pen and pad of paper. Write out four or five actions or solutions to begin solving the problem.

Taking yourself out of the emotionally charged negative by moving into the action-oriented positive will help you solve more problems rationally and live in positivity

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7. Take Full Responsibility, Stop Being the Victim

You are responsible for your thoughts.

People that consistently believe that things happen to them handicap themselves to a victim mentality. This is a subtle and deceptive negative thought pattern. Phrases like “I have to work” or “I can’t believe he did that to me” are indicators of a victim mentality. Blaming circumstances and blaming others only handicaps our decision to change something negative into something positive.

Taking full responsibility for your life, your thoughts and your actions is one of the biggest steps in creating a more positive life. We have unlimited potential within to create our own reality, change our life, and change our thoughts. When we begin to really internalize this, we discover that no one can make us feel or do anything. We choose our emotional and behavioral response to people and circumstances.

Make positive choices in favor of yourself.

“Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habit. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny” ― Lao Tzu

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Featured photo credit: Brooke Cagle via unsplash.com

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