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20 Excuses Most People Make That Stop Them From Reaching Their Dreams

20 Excuses Most People Make That Stop Them From Reaching Their Dreams

Have you ever said or done something that stopped and discouraged you from taking action toward your goals?

Excuses and negative self talk are common problems and are what usually stops most of us from fulfilling our dreams. But they aren’t apparent until we become conscious of them. And it’s not until you become conscious of them that you can start to begin changing them to help you move forward.

Here are 20 of the most common excuses people use that stop them from reaching their dreams:

1. I’m too old to start.

As long as you’re still living and breathing, you still have all the resources to turn your life around. All it takes is will and desire.

2. I’m not talented enough.

Talent alone isn’t enough to be truly successful. It might help you progress faster, but ultimately, all it requires is hard work and dedication to improve.

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3. I wasn’t born in the right area.

Your environment may have influenced the way you’ve been fostered, but that doesn’t mean you can’t decide to change your attitude. You are in control of what you choose to think and feel about yourself.

4. I come from a poor background.

Some of the most successful people got there with little but a few dollars in their pocket. Money may help you reach your goals faster, but the real value is your inner resources and resourcefulness to get the job done.

5. I’m not smart enough.

Don’t despair if you feel you lack the knowledge to pursue your goals. There is a good reason why you lack the knowledge—you’re just starting! The key to learning is to start from somewhere and make progress.

6. I don’t have the support.

While having the support is beneficial, it will not be the reason for your success and is simply ideal for getting you through hard times. The biggest things that matter in your journey toward success and achievement is your drive and motivation.

7. I don’t have enough time to discover what I like.

If you sit down and make a list of all the things you do in a typical day, you’ll begin to realize that you actually have enough time. Figure out what is wasting your time, and replace it with the things that will get you to your goals.

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8. My family and friends don’t think I’m capable.

No one can tell you how capable you really are besides yourself. If your friends and family disappeared tomorrow, will any of it still affect you? You are the driving force between where you are and where you want to be.

9. I don’t know if I will succeed.

The greatest mystery about life is in not knowing what’s going to happen. Sometimes, your journey will take you on roads you never thought existed.

10. I’ve already dedicated myself to a different path.

It is never too late to change paths. Just because you’re on one road doesn’t mean you can’t take a different path and pursue a different journey.

11. I’m just not lucky enough.

All of us are lucky all of the time. The difference is, you just don’t see the opportunities presented to you due to lack of preparation. Focus on preparing yourself for them, so when an opportunity comes, you naturally will become luckier.

12. I didn’t have the right teachers.

There really aren’t many things in this world that you can’t teach yourself. There is free and useful information you have access to at your fingertips that will give you the instructions you need to get started.

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13. I’m not destined to succeed.

Everything that ultimately happens in your life is all due, in part, to the decisions you make. If that’s your current belief about yourself then, chances are, you’re right.

14. I’m not motivated enough.

If you lack the drive to do whatever it is you hope to do, there’s a chance you don’t want it badly enough or see it as something you really want.

15. I’m too easily distracted by other things.

There are always going to be things around us that are more fun and exciting to do. But the key thing is to be disciplined and to dedicate a certain period of your time to help move you forward toward your goals.

16. I’m not educated enough.

Education isn’t necessarily something you have to learn at school. You can never have enough education to get started. If you’re unsure, just take action anyway and learn along the way. Experience always will be the best educator.

17. I can’t handle failure.

If that’s your belief, then it’s a lie. We are rejected every day of our lives, but we fail to see the rejections because we don’t choose to acknowledge them. Learn to detach yourself from outcomes and to see the process as journey of self-discovery.

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18. I will start tomorrow.

There is no such as a future, only the present. If you genuinely have the time to do something now, then use the opportunity and go and do it. You will feel a lot more energized and motivated, knowing you’ve pushed yourself and made progress.

19. I’m not ready.

You can never be prepared to get started. If it means learning more will prevent you from failure, then you’re wrong. You will make mistakes and simply learning more will fool you into thinking you’re making progress, when in fact it’s simply a buffer from taking action.

20. I don’t believe I can do it.

As with point No. 14, your beliefs help steer and guide you toward your goals. If you honestly believe with full conviction that you can do it, you will start to see that everything around you becomes easier. The quality environment is dictated by the things inside you.

Now, stop making excuses that keep you from reaching your dreams. Go forth and prosper!

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Last Updated on January 16, 2020

12 Simple Ways to Boost Your Confidence Right Now

12 Simple Ways to Boost Your Confidence Right Now

The way you feel about yourself greatly influences how you live and interact with others. If you are confident about yourself, you tend to see yourself positively and actually enjoy spending time with and around people. You don’t feel self-conscious or awkward around others, and that allows you to live your fullest and happiest life.

However, if you’re drowning in a sea of self-doubt, hesitancy and shyness, you often withdraw and isolate yourself from others and avoid interacting and connecting with people. That anxiety you feel in the pit of your stomach when you are around people is holding you back greatly and it is not good for your emotional health and overall well-being. You need to do something about it if you are low in self-confidence or have friends or family members who are not confident.

“Confidence isn’t walking into a room thinking you’re better than everyone, it’s walking in not having to compare yourself to anyone” – Anonymous

Here are simple, practical tips to boost your confidence right now and make you feel and act your best.

1. Stop labeling yourself as awkward, timid or shy.

When you label yourself as awkward, timid or shy, you sub-consciously tell your mind to act accordingly and psychologically feel inclined to live up to those expectations. Instead of labeling and entertaining negative self-talk, visualize and affirm yourself as confident and strong. Close your eyes for a minute and visualize yourself in different situation as you would like to be.

Be your own cheerleader. Experts believe that positive affirmation and good mental practices like picturing yourself winning or achieving a goal can lead to greater feelings of self-assurance and prepare your brain for success.[1] As the saying goes, “seeing is believing.” Picture yourself as confident and soon enough you will begin to manifest behavior that gives evidence to this new ‘fact.’

2. Recognize that the world is not focused on you (unless, of course, you are Kanye West).

That means you don’t have to be excessively sensitive about who you are or what you are doing (or not doing). You are not on the center stage; there is no need for preoccupation with self and perfectionism. As rap music star Rocko sings, “You just do you and I will do me, aight?”

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Forget about trying to please everyone or being perfect. Trying to be perfect and being a people-pleaser puts too much pressure on you and creates unnecessary anxiety. Besides, people are too preoccupied with their own issues to pay much attention to your every move unless, of course, you are a mega famous, super celebrity like Beyonce or Kanye West.

3. Focus on other people as opposed to yourself.

If you are low on confidence, self-conscious, nervous and shy in social situations, focus your attention on other people and what they are saying or doing instead of focusing on your own awkwardness.

For example, think about what it is that is interesting about the person who’s the centre of the party or the guy or girl you are talking with. Prompt them to talk more about themselves and be genuinely curious and interested in what they say. You will instantly come across as confident and warmhearted.

People generally want to talk about themselves, be heard and understood. They will love it when you’re eager and willing to listen to them and really hear what they have to say.

This habit of focusing more on what you love in others as opposed to what you dislike in yourself will not only help you become more assertive and comfortable in virtually all social situations, but also instantly make you feel great about yourself.

4. Know (and accept) yourself for who you are.

Chinese military general, strategist and philosopher Sun Tzu, author of the internationally acclaimed book The Art of War, said, “Know yourself and you will win all battles.” Even in the battle with lack of confidence, you will need to know yourself to win.

Knowing yourself starts with understanding that people are not all the same, neither are all social situation suitable for everyone. You might not be confident in large gatherings, but you could be bold and confident in one-on-one and small group interactions. We all have our own unique gifts and unique ways of expressing ourselves. Embrace yours!

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Introverts, for example, have a quiet confidence that is, unfortunately, often confused for shyness. They are naturally low key and prefer to spend time alone. However, this natural disposition affords them certain unique gifts, such as an ability to listen better than most people and notice things that others don’t.

Your uniqueness is where your strength and advantage lies. You won’t be comfortable and confident in all situations all the time. Albert Einstein said,

“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”

5. Crack a smile.

If there is one sure way to instantly boost your confidence, it’s cracking a smile. Christine Clapp, a public speaking expert at The George Washington University, says that flashing those pretty, pearly white teeth will immediately make you appear both confident and composed. But, the effect of smiling is not just external. Studies show that smiling can also help nix feelings of stress and pave the way for a happier and more relaxed you.[2]

Not a bad return for something seemingly so trite, wouldn’t you agree?

6. Break a sweat—with exercise.

Working out is another great way to make yourself feel amazing and confident. Science has shown that exercising increases your endorphins, helps reduce stress, tones your muscles and makes you feel happy and confident.[3]

And hey, all you have to do is take a walk a few times a week and you’ll see the benefits. What seems to matter—as far as your confidence goes—is whether you break a sweat, not how strenuous your session is, which is pretty cool. Start working out now.

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7. Groom yourself.

This might seem mundane, but it’s amazing how much of a difference a shower and shave can have on your confidence and self-image. And when you spritz on a scent, the boost on confidence and self-esteem is incredible. As it turns out, your favorite fragrance does more than make you smell oh-so-nice.

A study found that a fragrance can inspire confidence in men. Interestingly, the study also found that the more a man likes the fragrance, the more confident he might feel. Another study found that 90% of women feel more confident while wearing a scent than those who go fragrance-free.

8. Dress nicely.

Another one that might seem trite, but it works. If you dress nicely, you’ll instantly feel good about yourself and give your confidence a real boost. That is largely because you’ll feel attractive, presentable and sometimes even successful in nice clothes.

While dressing nicely means something different for everyone, it does not necessarily mean wearing $500 designer outfits. It means wearing clothes that are clean, that you are comfortable in and that are nice-looking and presentable, including casual clothes.

9. Do activities you enjoy.

Whether it is reading a book, playing a musical instrument, riding your bicycle or going fishing, do what you really enjoy and what makes you truly happy often. It will boost your self-esteem, soothe your ego and allow you to identify with your gifts and talents. That will in turn bolster your self-belief and grow your confidence exponentially.

You might not become popular for doing what you love, but you might not even want to be popular at all. Being popular doesn’t make you happy; doing what you love does.

10. Prepare for the possibility of rejection / setback.

Late World No. 1 professional tennis player Arthur Ashe said, “One important key to success is self-confidence. A key to self-confidence is preparation.” You need to prepare for the possibility of rejection and setback.

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Why?

Everybody suffers rejection and setback at one point or another. You are not exempted. The question on your mind, therefore, should not be if you will be rejected, but how you will handle rejection when it comes.

Prepare yourself adequately in every situation to minimize the risk and effect of rejection and so that your confidence is not broken. For example, learn public speaking and rehearse what you are going to say beforehand if you have landed a public speaking engagement. That way, you are sure of yourself and confident you have what it takes to hack it. If you are rejected, don’t take it personally.

Rejection and setbacks happen to the best of us. Take it as a learning experience. Learn from your mistakes and move on.

11. Face uncomfortable situations square in the face.

Don’t run away from uncomfortable situations. Running away from people or situations because you feel scared, shy or timid only confirms and reinforces your shyness. Instead, face the situation that makes you uneasy square in the face. For example, go ahead and talk to that person you are afraid to approach, or go straight to the front of your yoga class! What’s the worst that can happen?

Prepare and be ready for any eventuality. The more you face your fears, the more you realize you are stronger than you thought and the more confident you get. This simple, yet admittedly courageous, act makes you unstoppable. You get comfortable being uncomfortable and begin to feel like you can take on the world. And that is the hallmark of someone destined for great things.

12. Sit up straight and walk tall—you are awesome!

Yes, sit up straight and believe you are awesome. Don’t slump in your chair or slouch your shoulders. Experts say the right stance can not only keep your self-esteem and mood lifted, but also lead to more confidence in your own thoughts.[4]

The way to sit is to open up your chest and keep your head level so that you look and feel poised and assured. And when you get up, stand tall and walk like you’re on a mission. People who sit up straight and walk tall are more attractive and instantly feel more confident. Try it now: you’ll feel fierce and confident just by sitting up straight and walking tall.

Featured photo credit: Freshh Connection via unsplash.com

Reference

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