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16 Things You Need to Do on Your Own Before Doing with Someone Else

16 Things You Need to Do on Your Own Before Doing with Someone Else

Since times unknown, being alone has been equated to loneliness. This is one of the biggest myths and deep-rooted beliefs that make very little sense. Some people feel terribly lonely surrounded by hundreds of people, but experience the highest level of freedom in isolation.

I am a big believer in finding happiness by doing things on my own. Contrary to popular belief, this has nothing to do with being an introvert, having no friends, or being lost in abandonment. In fact, I am very social and have the most amazing family, friends, co-workers and mentors. While I enjoy spending time with them, I also enjoy my own company. It is not only fun and rewarding, but a great way to reassure yourself that you are capable and independent.

Not convinced? Scared? Out of your comfort zone? I urge you to try these things on your own, unaided and unaccompanied. Disclaimer: You are most likely to experience pure ecstasy.

1. Immerse in a murder mystery.

Pick up any Hercule Poirot novel by Agatha Christie from your nearest bookstore. They are easy to read but gripping enough to let you lose track of time. For more nail-biting thrillers, try Jo Nesbo or choose from the list of best murder mysteries of all times.

2. It’s time for fine dining, at home.

What is your favorite dish? Replicate it at home, buying fresh ingredients and following a trustworthy recipe from a cookbook or the Internet. Create an ambiance in your dining space with your best dinnerware, a glass of wine, candlelight and music. Dress up and treat yourself like a king. You deserve it!

DinnerAlone2

    3. Play Scrabble® with yourself.

    No one will rush you, and there will be no annoying Mr. Smarty Pants to compete with. You don’t have to resist looking at the dictionary either. At the end of the day you will have some new words under your belt. It’s a win-win situation.

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    Scrabble

      4. Create an inspirational word art.

      Even if the paintbrush is not your friend, tap into your hidden creativity by making a simple piece of art using words. Use leftover newspaper, magazines, pens and other random objects lying around your home. Go crazy with your imagination as you make your own rules. Once done, hang it on the wall and pat yourself on the back.

      InspirationalArt

        5. Travel to a new city.

        If you haven’t been on a getaway by yourself, it’s high time you do it. Don’t rob yourself from the joy of getting lost in an unknown city. Wake up whenever, go wherever and eat whatever you want. Discover and explore the beauty of the world, without a timetable.

        TravelAlone

          6. Exercise your vocal muscles.

          Want to feel heard and liberated? Sing at the top of your lungs, while no one is around. The neighbors might hear you. If you enjoy it too much, you may actually break into a dance, which brings me to the next point.

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          Singer

            7. Dance until you drop.

            Warm up at home and master your moves. Then hit the dance club. Don’t be shy; you may actually end up having a fan following. Freestyle dancing helps increase your self esteem, improve flexibility, balance better and burn calories. What are you waiting for? 5-6-7-8!

            Dance

              8. Head to the theaters for an animated film.

              Who needs company to watch an animated movie? You spend approximately two hours gazing at the screen engaged in some serious laughter. Most of the time, you don’t even remember who you came to the movies with. Besides, you own that whole bag of popcorn.

              AnimatedFilm

                9. Meditate in style.

                One of the best solitary activities that can energize you, refresh you, and take all your stress away is meditation. Take time off your routine activities to reflect and introspect. Delve into your inner self and find harmony. For some unconventional meditation techniques, look here.

                Meditate

                  10. Take an epic ‘selfie’ video.

                  Select a solo scene of your favorite actor or actress. Get into the character and record yourself enacting that scene. Perfection takes practice, so you may need a few takes. Brave enough to put it on Youtube?

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                  Selfie

                    11. Be the first person in the gym.

                    Wake up early and wait for the gym doors to open. There is nothing like working out in a clean sweat-free environment, while no one is judging your flab. No gym membership? Mother nature is your treadmill.

                    Gym

                      12. Sip a martini like 007.

                      Happy hour can be happier when you go the bar alone and stylishly ask for a martini. Savor each sip and open yourself to the opportunity of making new friends.

                      Martini

                        13. Go for a picnic in the park

                        Give up time spent in opinionated discussions, all for the perfect spot in the park. Soak in the sun, let the breeze flirt with you and observe your surroundings. People-watching is an underrated educational activity.

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                        Park

                          14. Be your personal shopper.

                          Take yourself shopping for a makeover. If you’re on a budget, accept the challenge and find atypical stores. Getting a new look can be a huge confidence booster.

                          MakeOver

                            15. Strike off the longest living item on your to-do list..

                            What is that one thing featured on your ‘things to do today’ that’s been there since last month? Take time on a weekend to finally do it. Find a sense of accomplishment from life’s little things.

                            ToDoList

                              16. Make your own Happiness Jar.

                              Every time you enjoy doing something alone, write the activity on a piece of paper. Drop it in a container and label it “My Happiness Jar.’ If you are bored, feeling blue, or stressed, simply draw a random slip of paper from this jar and do what is written.

                              HappinessJar

                                Photo Credit: Featured Image and many other post images are sourced from Creative Commons, license 2.0.

                                Featured photo credit: Jump over Mt. Rainier/The U.S. Army via flickr.com

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                                Last Updated on July 16, 2019

                                7 Ways to Get Rid of Negative Energy and Become Positive

                                7 Ways to Get Rid of Negative Energy and Become Positive

                                Negativity affects ourselves and everyone around us. It limits our potential to become something great and live a fulfilling, purposeful life. Negativity has a tangible effect on our health, too. Research has shown that people who cultivate negative energy experience more stress, more sickness, and less opportunity over the course of their lives than those who choose to live positively.

                                When we make a decision to become positive, and follow that decision up with action, we will begin to encounter situations and people that are also positive. The negative energy gets edged out by all positive experiences. It’s a snowball effect.

                                Although negative and positive thoughts will always exist, the key to becoming positive is to limit the amount of negativity that we experience by filling ourselves up with more positivity.

                                Here are some ways to get rid of negativity and become more positive.

                                1. Become Grateful for Everything

                                When life is all about us, it’s easy to believe that we deserve what we have. An attitude of entitlement puts us at the center of the universe and sets up the unrealistic expectation that others should cater to us, our needs, and our wants. This vain state of existence is a surefire way to set yourself up for an unfulfilled life of negativity.

                                People living in this sort of entitlement are “energy suckers”–they are always searching for what they can get out of a situation. People that don’t appreciate the nuances of their lives live in a constant state of lacking. And it’s really difficult to live a positive life this way.

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                                When we begin to be grateful and appreciate everything in our lives–from the small struggles that make us better, to the car that gets us from A to B every day–we shift our attitude from one of selfishness, to one of appreciation. This appreciation gets noticed by others, and a positive harmony begins to form in our relationships.

                                We begin to receive more of that which we are grateful for, because we’ve opened ourselves up to the idea of receiving, instead of taking. This will make your life more fulfilling, and more positive.

                                2. Laugh More, Especially at Yourself

                                Life gets busy, our schedules fill up, we get into relationships, and work can feel task oriented and routine-driven at times. Being human can feel more like being a robot. But having this work-driven, serious attitude often results in negative and performance oriented thinking.

                                Becoming positive means taking life less seriously and letting yourself off the hook. This is the only life that you get to live, why not lighten up your mood?

                                Laughter helps us become positive by lightening our mood and reminding us not to take life so seriously. Are you sensitive to light sarcasm? Do you have trouble laughing at jokes? Usually, people who are stressed out and overly serious get most offended by sarcasm because their life is all work and no play.

                                If we can learn to laugh at ourselves and our mistakes, life will become more of an experiment in finding out what makes us happy. And finding happiness means finding positivity.

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                                3. Help Others

                                Negativity goes hand in hand with selfishness. People that live only for themselves have no higher purpose in their lives. If the whole point of this world is only to take care of yourself and no one else, the road to a long-term fulfillment and purpose is going to be a long one.

                                Positivity accompanies purpose. The most basic way to create purpose and positivity in your life is to begin doing things for others. Start small; open the door for the person in front of you at Starbucks or ask someone how their day was before telling them about yours.

                                Helping others will give you an intangible sense of value that will translate into positivity. And people might just appreciate you in the process.

                                4. Change Your Thinking

                                We can either be our best coach or our best enemy. Change starts from within. If you want to become more positive, change the wording of your thoughts. We are the hardest on ourselves, and a stream of negative self talk is corrosive to a positive life.

                                The next time you have a negative thought, write it down and rephrase it with a positive spin. For example, change a thought like, “I can’t believe I did so horribly on the test–I suck.” to “I didn’t do as well as I hoped to on this test. But I know I’m capable and I’ll do better next time.”

                                Changing our self-talk is powerful.

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                                5. Surround Yourself with Positive People

                                We become most like the people that we surround ourselves with. If our friend group is full of negative energy-suckers and drama queens, we will emulate that behavior and become like them. It is very difficult to become more positive when the people around us don’t support or demonstrate positive behavior.

                                As you become more positive, you’ll find that your existing friends will either appreciate the new you or they will become resistant to your positive changes. This is a natural response.

                                Change is scary; but cutting out the negative people in your life is a huge step to becoming more positive. Positive people reflect and bounce their perspectives onto one another. Positivity is a step-by-step process when you do it solo, but a positive group of friends can be an escalator.

                                6. Get into Action

                                Negative thoughts can be overwhelming and challenging to navigate. Negativity is usually accompanied by a “freak-out” response, especially when tied to relationships, people and to worrying about the future. This is debilitating to becoming positive and usually snowballs into more worry, more stress and more freak-outs.

                                Turn the negative stress into positive action. The next time you’re in one of these situations, walk away and take a break. With your eyes closed, take a few deep breaths. Once you’re calm, approach the situation or problem with a pen and pad of paper. Write out four or five actions or solutions to begin solving the problem.

                                Taking yourself out of the emotionally charged negative by moving into the action-oriented positive will help you solve more problems rationally and live in positivity

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                                7. Take Full Responsibility, Stop Being the Victim

                                You are responsible for your thoughts.

                                People that consistently believe that things happen to them handicap themselves to a victim mentality. This is a subtle and deceptive negative thought pattern. Phrases like “I have to work” or “I can’t believe he did that to me” are indicators of a victim mentality. Blaming circumstances and blaming others only handicaps our decision to change something negative into something positive.

                                Taking full responsibility for your life, your thoughts and your actions is one of the biggest steps in creating a more positive life. We have unlimited potential within to create our own reality, change our life, and change our thoughts. When we begin to really internalize this, we discover that no one can make us feel or do anything. We choose our emotional and behavioral response to people and circumstances.

                                Make positive choices in favor of yourself.

                                “Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habit. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny” ― Lao Tzu

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                                Featured photo credit: Brooke Cagle via unsplash.com

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