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15 Types Of People You Should Meet In Your 20s

15 Types Of People You Should Meet In Your 20s

The people you meet always add something to your life, be it negative or positive. Regardless of the type of impact they leave, you always learn a valuable lesson from their presence. Below are the different types of people you have to meet in your 20s to help shape you into the person you want to be.

1. The Giver

This person has dedicated their whole life to the simple art of giving. Be it giving a homeless person loose change or their time to an animal shelter, they are always giving. Being around this giving nature will unintentionally motivate you to give more of yourself too.

2. The Adventurer

The Adventurer is always going somewhere and always doing something unbelievably exciting. Although you may not always be up for everything they are up to, simply being around them when they do thrilling things will inspire you to break out of your comfort zone and do things you never would normally do. This person will push you to travel the world, which is what everybody in their twenties has to do at some point.

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3. The Helper

This person is always willing to help no matter what their situation is. Whether it’s you in trouble or someone else, this person is always ready to help. Being around this person drives you to be more aware of people who are in need of help and extend your hand more than you usually would.

4. The Complainer

For this person, nothing is ever good enough. Nothing can ever meet their standards. When you are around them, all you ever hear is them complaining about something or the other. Although this may not be the healthiest environment, it helps you reflect on your views in life and makes you appreciate things more. Being around the complainer actually makes you complain less.

5. The Risk-taker

This person is constantly taking risks in their relationships or even in their workplace. They always seem to place everything on the line, which may not always work out well. Seeing them being extremely brave with their choices motivates you to be the same way. Even if you don’t become an extreme risk taker, you end up pushing yourself to be more risky than you usually would.

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6. The Free-spirit

The Free-spirit has no ties to anything or anyone. They are constantly changing jobs and moving from one relationship to the next. They constantly move houses and sometimes countries.You may find it very hard to keep track of where this person is or what they are doing. Their freedom reminds you to not take life so seriously. They remind you how transient things can be, which helps you enjoy moments in life more.

7. The Stable One

The complete opposite of the Free-spirit, the Stable One has their life in order. They have the standard nine to five job with the very stable relationship and a lease contract valid for more than a year. These people weren’t always this stable. In fact, they probably were messes a couple of years ago. Being around them reminds you that it’s possible to gain stability even if it seems like your life is a mess. After meeting them, you know that things will get better with time.

8. The Bossy One

The Bossy One feels the need to take charge in every situation, which can get incredibly irritating at times. The Bossy One shows you how important taking charge is but also when you need to take a step back.

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9. The Honest One

This person will tell you to the truth no matter what. It doesn’t matter if you are in tears, you know you’ll hear the honest answer to whatever question you just asked. Their blunt attitude towards life keeps you on track and reminds you how important the truth really is.

10. The Optimist

The Optimist always puts a positive spin on whatever situation they are in. Their blind positive attitude may be irritating at times, but it reminds you that you should always look on the bright side no matter what obstacles cross your path.

11. The Pessimist

The Pessimist prevents you from floating away on The Optimist’s cloud of positivity. They keep you grounded by reminding you of all the things that could go wrong. Their constant negative attitude on life keeps you in touch with reality, but also makes sure you maintain a balance between being a realist and an idealist.

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12. The Married One

This person has found the love of their life and has made the ultimate commitment. Knowing someone like this helps you figure out what you want, while subtly stressing the existence of love and it’s importance.

13. The Manipulative One

Everyone has to meet The Manipulative One at some point in their lives. This person manages to get what they want by using you as the pawn. After you realise how you’ve been manipulated, you learn to be more cautious in life. The Manipulative One teaches you to be stronger than you thought you could be.

14. The Backstabber

When you meet this person, you will trust them with everything only to have them use it against you. It’s important you meet someone like this to remind you that being trusting is the best quality you can have while betraying trust is the worst.

15. The Wise One

This person has a quote stored in their minds that applies to almost any situation you find yourself in. They are like a walking self-help book. They also have the best advice when you find yourself stuck. Being around The Wise One allows the wisdom to rub off on you as well.

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Last Updated on September 18, 2020

13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

For the original article by Celestine: 13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

“We all have problems. The way we solve them is what makes us different.” ~Unknown

“It’s not stress that kills us, it is our reaction to it.” – Hans Selye

Have you ever experienced moments when things just don’t go your way? For example, losing your keys, accidentally spilling your drink, waking up late, missing your buses/trains, forgetting to bring your things, and so on?

You’re not alone. All of us, myself included, experience times when things don’t go as we expect.

Here is my guide on how to deal with daily setbacks.

1. Take a step back and evaluate

When something bad happens, take a step back and evaluate the situation. Some questions to ask yourself:

  1. What is the problem?
  2. Are you the only person facing this problem in the world today?
  3. How does this problem look like at an individual level? A national level? On a global scale?
  4. What’s the worst possible thing that can happen to you as a result of this?
  5. How is it going to impact your life in the next 1 year? 5 years? 10 years?

Doing this exercise is not to undermine the problem or disclaiming responsibility, but to consider different perspectives, so you can adopt the best approach for it. Most problems we encounter daily may seem like huge issues when they crop up, but most, if not all, don’t have much impact in our life beyond that day.

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2. Vent if you have to, but don’t linger on the problem

If you feel very frustrated and need to let off some steam, go ahead and do that. Talk to a friend, complain, crib about it, or scream at the top of your lungs if it makes you happy.

At the same time, don’t get caught up with venting. While venting may temporarily relieve yourself, it’s not going to solve the problem ultimately. You don’t want to be an energy vampire.

Vent if there’s a need to, but do it for 15 to 20 minutes. Then move on.

3. Realize there are others out there facing this too

Even though the situation may be frustrating, you’re not alone. Remember there are almost 7 billion people in the world today, and chances are that other people have faced the same thing before too. Knowing it’s not just you helps you to get out of a self-victimizing mindset.

4. Process your thoughts/emotions

Process your thoughts/emotions with any of the four methods:

  1. Journal. Write your unhappiness in a private diary or in your blog. It doesn’t have to be formal at all – it can be a brain dump on rough paper or new word document. Delete after you are done.
  2. Audio taping. Record yourself as you talk out what’s on your mind. Tools include tape recorder, your PC (Audacity is a freeware for recording/editing audio) and your mobile (most mobiles today have audio recording functions). You can even use your voice mail for this. Just talking helps you to gain awareness of your emotions. After recording, play back and listen to what you said. You might find it quite revealing.
  3. Meditation. At its simplest form, meditation is just sitting/lying still and observing your reality as it is – including your thoughts and emotions. Some think that it involves some complex mambo-jumbo, but it doesn’t.
  4. Talking to someone. Talking about it with someone helps you work through the issue. It also gets you an alternate viewpoint and consider it from a different angle.

5. Acknowledge your thoughts

Don’t resist your thoughts, but acknowledge them. This includes both positive and negative thoughts.

By acknowledging, I mean recognizing these thoughts exist. So if say, you have a thought that says, “Wow, I’m so stupid!”, acknowledge that. If you have a thought that says, “I can’t believe this is happening to me again”, acknowledge that as well.

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Know that acknowledging the thoughts doesn’t mean you agree with them. It’s simply recognizing the existence of said thoughts so that you can stop resisting yourself and focus on the situation on hand.

6. Give yourself a break

If you’re very stressed out by the situation, and the problem is not time sensitive, then give yourself a break. Take a walk, listen to some music, watch a movie, or get some sleep. When you’re done, you should feel a lot more revitalized to deal with the situation.

7. Uncover what you’re really upset about

A lot of times, the anger we feel isn’t about the world. You may start off feeling angry at someone or something, but at the depth of it, it’s anger toward yourself.

Uncover the root of your anger. I have written a five part anger management series on how to permanently overcome anger.

After that, ask yourself: How can you improve the situation? Go to Step #9, where you define your actionable steps. Our anger comes from not having control on the situation. Sitting there and feeling infuriated is not going to change the situation. The more action we take, the more we will regain control over the situation, the better we will feel.

8. See this as an obstacle to be overcome

As Helen Keller once said,

“Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experiences of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired and success achieved.”

Whatever you’re facing right now, see it as an obstacle to be overcome. In every worthy endeavor, there’ll always be countless obstacles that emerge along the way. These obstacles are what separate the people who make it, and those who don’t. If you’re able to push through and overcome them, you’ll emerge a stronger person than before. It’ll be harder for anything to get you down in the future.

9. Analyze the situation – Focus on actionable steps

In every setback, there are going to be things that can’t be reversed since they have already occurred. You want to focus on things that can still be changed (salvageable) vs. things that have already happened and can’t be changed. The only time the situation changes is when you take steps to improve it. Rather than cry over spilt milk, work through your situation:

  1. What’s the situation?
  2. What’s stressing you about this situation?
  3. What are the next steps that’ll help you resolve them?
  4. Take action on your next steps!

After you have identified your next steps, act on them. The key here is to focus on the actionable steps, not the inactionable steps. It’s about regaining control over the situation through direct action.

10. Identify how it occurred (so it won’t occur again next time)

A lot of times we react to our problems. The problem occurs, and we try to make the best out of what has happened within the context. While developing a healthy coping mechanism is important (which is what the other helping points are on), it’s also equally important, if not more, to understand how the problem arose. This way, you can work on preventing it from taking place next time, vs. dealing reactively with it.

Most of us probably think the problem is outside of our control, but reality is most of the times it’s fully preventable. It’s just a matter of how much responsibility you take over the problem.

For example, for someone who can’t get a cab for work in the morning, he/she may see the problem as a lack of cabs in the country, or bad luck. However, if you trace to the root of the problem, it’s probably more to do with (a) Having unrealistic expectations of the length of time to get a cab. He/she should budget more time for waiting for a cab next time. (b) Oversleeping, because he/she was too tired from working late the previous day. He/she should allocate enough time for rest next time. He/she should also pick up better time management skills, so as to finish work in lesser time.

11. Realize the situation can be a lot worse

No matter how bad the situation is, it can always be much worse. A plus point vs. negative point analysis will help you realize that.

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12. Do your best, but don’t kill yourself over it

No matter how bad your situation may seem, do your best, but don’t kill yourself over it. Life is too beautiful to worry so much over daily issues. Take a step back (#1), give yourself a break if you need to (#6), and do what you can within your means (#9). Everything else will unfold accordingly. Worrying too much about the outcome isn’t going to change things or make your life any better.

13. Pick out the learning points from the encounter

There’s something to learn from every encounter. What have you learned from this situation? What lessons have you taken away?

After you identify your learning points, think about how you’re going to apply them moving forward. With this, you’ve clearly gained something from this encounter. You’ve walked away a stronger, wiser, better person, with more life lessons to draw from in the future.

Get the manifesto version of this article: [Manifesto] What To Do When Things Don’t Go Your Way

Featured photo credit: Alice Donovan Rouse via unsplash.com

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