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15 Traits Of A High-Quality Best Friend

15 Traits Of A High-Quality Best Friend

Friends – how many of us have them? I have a lot of contacts in my phone, but there are only a small handful of people I consider my friends. They’re the ones that stuck with me as I transitioned from corporate shill to antihero, the ones who picked up the phone when I lost everything and desperately grasped for normalcy. I don’t call anyone my bff unless they meet these criteria.

1. A best friend listens to you.

ron harry hermione bff lifehack versability
    …so I said, “Rectum? Damn near killed him!!!”

    It doesn’t matter how many times you’ve said the same asinine thing – a true best friend never tires of hearing your ridiculous stories. Your best friend is one who listens to your work gossip, even if he or she doesn’t understand it.

    2. A best friend always has your back.

    Lethal Weapon lifehack versability
      Stop, or my mom will shoot…

      Some people act friendly to you, but when the chips are down, they turn their back. A high-quality best friend is always there. If you walk into a Hell’s Angels clubhouse to explain motorcycles are for pussies, your best friend is waiting outside with the engine running.

      3. A best friend accepts you at your worst.

      ren stimpy lifehack versability
        It’s log – log. It’s big. It’s heavy. It’s wood. Log. Log. Better than bad; it’s good…

        Ever wonder if your friends are real? You’ll find out when you do something bad. Fake friends can’t deal with your vices, addictions or bad decisions. A real best friend loves you when you’re in the gutter with your middle finger in the air.

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        4. A best friend loves you.

        JD Turk lifehack versability
          I love you like a fat kid loves cake…

          I have to admit, I have a few bromances – they’re those guys I hug a little longer, make an uncomfortable amount of eye contact with at parties, and have licked for a variety of reasons. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for these people because they’re high-quality best friends.

          5. A best friend can talk about personal things.

          sheldon leonard friends lifehack
            Some secret handshakes are complicated; some are simplistic…

            The most substantial and sincere friendships you have are with people you can talk openly with about all your personal business. High-quality best friends can take a conversation from breakfast to work to your diarrhea without batting an eye.

            6. A best friend knows how to make you smile.

            will carlton bff lifehack versability
              It is unusual to see black folk living in such expensive digs…

              We all have certain triggers that make us smile or laugh. Friends have inside jokes – best friends reference those shared moments anytime you’re down to make sure you have a smile on your face.

              7. A best friend gives an honest opinion.

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              Tina Amy Lifehack Versability
                CAT FIGHT!!! 

                Any stranger can be polite – as a decent human being, you should be polite to people as a default setting. What makes a high-quality best friend is their authentic voice. They’ll tell you when you look a hot mess instead of smiling to your face and telling everyone else.

                8. A best friend sticks by your side.

                stan kyle bff lifehack versability
                  It’s a new world, Charlie Brown…

                  You’ll go through some crazy things in life. I’ve found people start to avoid you when you become too much of an inconvenience. Anyone who’s ever been through a major medical condition can tell you acquaintances sign a card, friends visit you in the hospital, and best friends sit with you while you sleep.

                  9. A best friend helps you even when he or she doesn’t agree.

                  Jay Silent Bob Lifehack Versability
                    Ride the pony, Bob…Ride it all night long…

                    Whistleblowing taught me a lot about relationships. A lot of my friends and family didn’t agree with my decision to butt heads with the man, especially in such a public manner. My high-quality best friends were the ones who accepted me and my life decisions, whether they agreed or not.

                    10. A best friend encourages you.

                    troy abed bff lifehack versability
                      Say it with your chest…

                      We have those people in our lives who want to outdo, outshine or down us. It’s OK to be competitive, but people who don’t have your best interests at heart aren’t your friends. An actual best friend encourages you in your endeavors.

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                      11. A best friend knows your secrets.

                      Cheech Chong BFF Versability Lifehack
                        I’ve seen bigger…

                        Co-workers, classmates and clients all have their places in our lives. We share time, space and experiences with these people. Your actual friends have been there when you’ve done things you don’t necessarily broadcast to the public. A solid best friend knows all your dirty little secrets, and keeps them that way.

                        12. A best friend traverses time and space.

                        bill ted lifehack versability

                          My president is black…soon Keanu Reeves will be in charge…

                          I spent the last week crashing on the couch of one of my high-quality best friends. We hadn’t seen each other in three years and talked maybe two or three times in that period. There are a lot of reasons for the original distance, and when I showed up on her doorstep, none of those reasons mattered; we hung out as though it was just yesterday we last saw each other.

                          13. A best friend is dependable.

                          Bert Ernie Lifehack Versabiliy
                            Bert…are we…more than just friends?

                            A high-quality best friend is one you can count on. My best friends know what they can expect from me, and I know what I can expect from them. We don’t cross each other’s boundaries, and we go out of our way to accommodate each other.

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                            14. A best friend never judges you.

                            Farley Spade Lifehack Versability
                              We lost the wrong one…

                              Everyone hates being judged when it’s bad, but we all judge people. A high-quality best friend already judged you a long time ago when you met, so they have no need to do it ever again.

                              15. A best friend celebrates your success.

                              Matt Damon Ben Affleck Friends Lifehack Versability

                                Sometimes I’m the Robin – sometimes Ben is…

                                One of these days, you’re going to succeed at something in life – that’s when the haters come out the woodworks. Some people you thought were your friends turn out not to be. Your high-quality best friends are the ones who celebrate with you, rather than let their envy get the best of them.

                                A friend bails you out of jail, but a best friend is in the cell next to you. Quality always comes before quantity, and in order to find quality best friends, you need to be a high-quality best friend yourself. Be the change you wish to see in the world, and go make quality friends.

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                                Last Updated on January 18, 2019

                                7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

                                7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

                                Some people will have a rain cloud hanging over them, no matter what the weather is outside. Their negative attitude is toxic to your own moods, and you probably feel like there is little you can do about it.

                                But that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

                                If you want to effectively deal with negative people and be a champion of positivity, then your best route is to take definite action through some of the steps below.

                                1. Limit the time you spend with them.

                                First, let’s get this out of the way. You can be more positive than a cartoon sponge, but even your enthusiasm has a chance of being afflicted by the constant negativity of a friend.

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                                In fact, negativity has been proven to damage your health physically, making you vulnerable to high levels of stress and even cardiac disease. There’s no reason to get hurt because of someone else’s bad mood.

                                Though this may be a little tricky depending on your situation, working to spend slightly less time around negative people will keep your own spirits from slipping as well.

                                2. Speak up for yourself.

                                Don’t just absorb the comments that you are being bombarded with, especially if they are about you. It’s wise to be quick to listen and slow to speak, but being too quiet can give the person the impression that you are accepting what’s being said.

                                3. Don’t pretend that their behavior is “OK.”

                                This is an easy trap to fall into. Point out to the person that their constant negativity isn’t a good thing. We don’t want to do this because it’s far easier to let someone sit in their woes, and we’d rather just stay out of it.

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                                But if you want the best for this person, avoid giving the false impression that their negativity is normal.

                                4. Don’t make their problems your problems.

                                Though I consider empathy a gift, it can be a dangerous thing. When we hear the complaints of a friend or family member, we typically start to take on their burdens with them.

                                This is a bad habit to get into, especially if this is a person who is almost exclusively negative. These types of people are prone to embellishing and altering a story in order to gain sympathy.

                                Why else would they be sharing this with you?

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                                5. Change the subject.

                                When you suspect that a conversation is starting to take a turn for the negative, be a champion of positivity by changing the subject. Of course, you have to do this without ignoring what the other person said.

                                Acknowledge their comment, but move the conversation forward before the euphoric pleasure gained from complaining takes hold of either of you.

                                6. Talk about solutions, not problems.

                                Sometimes, changing the subject isn’t an option if you want to deal with negative people, but that doesn’t mean you can’t still be positive.

                                I know that when someone begins dumping complaints on me, I have a hard time knowing exactly what to say. The key is to measure your responses as solution-based.

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                                You can do this by asking questions like, “Well, how could this be resolved?” or, “How do you think they feel about it?”

                                Use discernment to find an appropriate response that will help your friend manage their perspectives.

                                7. Leave them behind.

                                Sadly, there are times when we have to move on without these friends, especially if you have exhausted your best efforts toward building a positive relationship.

                                If this person is a family member, you can still have a functioning relationship with them, of course, but you may still have to limit the influence they have over your wellbeing.

                                That being said, what are some steps you’ve taken to deal with negative people? Let us know in the comments.

                                You may also want to read: How to Stop the Negative Spin of Thoughts, Emotions and Actions.

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