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15 Traits Of A High-Quality Best Friend

15 Traits Of A High-Quality Best Friend

Friends – how many of us have them? I have a lot of contacts in my phone, but there are only a small handful of people I consider my friends. They’re the ones that stuck with me as I transitioned from corporate shill to antihero, the ones who picked up the phone when I lost everything and desperately grasped for normalcy. I don’t call anyone my bff unless they meet these criteria.

1. A best friend listens to you.

ron harry hermione bff lifehack versability
    …so I said, “Rectum? Damn near killed him!!!”

    It doesn’t matter how many times you’ve said the same asinine thing – a true best friend never tires of hearing your ridiculous stories. Your best friend is one who listens to your work gossip, even if he or she doesn’t understand it.

    2. A best friend always has your back.

    Lethal Weapon lifehack versability
      Stop, or my mom will shoot…

      Some people act friendly to you, but when the chips are down, they turn their back. A high-quality best friend is always there. If you walk into a Hell’s Angels clubhouse to explain motorcycles are for pussies, your best friend is waiting outside with the engine running.

      3. A best friend accepts you at your worst.

      ren stimpy lifehack versability
        It’s log – log. It’s big. It’s heavy. It’s wood. Log. Log. Better than bad; it’s good…

        Ever wonder if your friends are real? You’ll find out when you do something bad. Fake friends can’t deal with your vices, addictions or bad decisions. A real best friend loves you when you’re in the gutter with your middle finger in the air.

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        4. A best friend loves you.

        JD Turk lifehack versability
          I love you like a fat kid loves cake…

          I have to admit, I have a few bromances – they’re those guys I hug a little longer, make an uncomfortable amount of eye contact with at parties, and have licked for a variety of reasons. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for these people because they’re high-quality best friends.

          5. A best friend can talk about personal things.

          sheldon leonard friends lifehack
            Some secret handshakes are complicated; some are simplistic…

            The most substantial and sincere friendships you have are with people you can talk openly with about all your personal business. High-quality best friends can take a conversation from breakfast to work to your diarrhea without batting an eye.

            6. A best friend knows how to make you smile.

            will carlton bff lifehack versability
              It is unusual to see black folk living in such expensive digs…

              We all have certain triggers that make us smile or laugh. Friends have inside jokes – best friends reference those shared moments anytime you’re down to make sure you have a smile on your face.

              7. A best friend gives an honest opinion.

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              Tina Amy Lifehack Versability
                CAT FIGHT!!! 

                Any stranger can be polite – as a decent human being, you should be polite to people as a default setting. What makes a high-quality best friend is their authentic voice. They’ll tell you when you look a hot mess instead of smiling to your face and telling everyone else.

                8. A best friend sticks by your side.

                stan kyle bff lifehack versability
                  It’s a new world, Charlie Brown…

                  You’ll go through some crazy things in life. I’ve found people start to avoid you when you become too much of an inconvenience. Anyone who’s ever been through a major medical condition can tell you acquaintances sign a card, friends visit you in the hospital, and best friends sit with you while you sleep.

                  9. A best friend helps you even when he or she doesn’t agree.

                  Jay Silent Bob Lifehack Versability
                    Ride the pony, Bob…Ride it all night long…

                    Whistleblowing taught me a lot about relationships. A lot of my friends and family didn’t agree with my decision to butt heads with the man, especially in such a public manner. My high-quality best friends were the ones who accepted me and my life decisions, whether they agreed or not.

                    10. A best friend encourages you.

                    troy abed bff lifehack versability
                      Say it with your chest…

                      We have those people in our lives who want to outdo, outshine or down us. It’s OK to be competitive, but people who don’t have your best interests at heart aren’t your friends. An actual best friend encourages you in your endeavors.

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                      11. A best friend knows your secrets.

                      Cheech Chong BFF Versability Lifehack
                        I’ve seen bigger…

                        Co-workers, classmates and clients all have their places in our lives. We share time, space and experiences with these people. Your actual friends have been there when you’ve done things you don’t necessarily broadcast to the public. A solid best friend knows all your dirty little secrets, and keeps them that way.

                        12. A best friend traverses time and space.

                        bill ted lifehack versability

                          My president is black…soon Keanu Reeves will be in charge…

                          I spent the last week crashing on the couch of one of my high-quality best friends. We hadn’t seen each other in three years and talked maybe two or three times in that period. There are a lot of reasons for the original distance, and when I showed up on her doorstep, none of those reasons mattered; we hung out as though it was just yesterday we last saw each other.

                          13. A best friend is dependable.

                          Bert Ernie Lifehack Versabiliy
                            Bert…are we…more than just friends?

                            A high-quality best friend is one you can count on. My best friends know what they can expect from me, and I know what I can expect from them. We don’t cross each other’s boundaries, and we go out of our way to accommodate each other.

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                            14. A best friend never judges you.

                            Farley Spade Lifehack Versability
                              We lost the wrong one…

                              Everyone hates being judged when it’s bad, but we all judge people. A high-quality best friend already judged you a long time ago when you met, so they have no need to do it ever again.

                              15. A best friend celebrates your success.

                              Matt Damon Ben Affleck Friends Lifehack Versability

                                Sometimes I’m the Robin – sometimes Ben is…

                                One of these days, you’re going to succeed at something in life – that’s when the haters come out the woodworks. Some people you thought were your friends turn out not to be. Your high-quality best friends are the ones who celebrate with you, rather than let their envy get the best of them.

                                A friend bails you out of jail, but a best friend is in the cell next to you. Quality always comes before quantity, and in order to find quality best friends, you need to be a high-quality best friend yourself. Be the change you wish to see in the world, and go make quality friends.

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                                Last Updated on December 10, 2019

                                5 Smart Reasons to Start Journal Writing Today

                                5 Smart Reasons to Start Journal Writing Today

                                Here’s the truth: your effectiveness at life is not what it could be. You’re missing out.

                                Each day passes by and you have nothing to prove that it even happened. Did you achieve something? Go on a date? Have an emotional breakthrough? Who knows?

                                But what you do know is that you don’t want to make the same mistakes that you’ve made in the past.

                                Our lives are full of hidden gems of knowledge and insight, and the most recent events in our lives contain the most useful gems of all. Do you know why? It’s simple, those hidden lessons are the most up to date, meaning they have the largest impact on what we’re doing right now.

                                But the question is, how do you get those lessons? There’s a simple way to do it, and it doesn’t involve time machines:

                                Journal writing.

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                                Improved mental clarity, the ability to see our lives in the big picture, as well as serving as a piece of evidence cataloguing every success we’ve ever had; we are provided all of the above and more by doing some journal writing.

                                Journal writing is a useful and flexible tool to help shed light on achieving your goals.

                                Here’s 5 smart reasons why you should do journal writing:

                                1. Journals Help You Have a Better Connection with Your Values, Emotions, and Goals

                                By journaling about what you believe in, why you believe it, how you feel, and what your goals are, you understand your relationships with these things better. This is because you must sort through the mental clutter and provide details on why you do what you do and feel what you feel.

                                Consider this:

                                Perhaps you’ve spent the last year or so working at a job you don’t like. It would be easy to just suck it up and keep working with your head down, going on as if it’s supposed to be normal to not like your job. Nobody else is complaining, so why should you, right?

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                                But a little journal writing will set things straight for you. You don’t like your job. You feel like it’s robbing you of happiness and satisfaction, and you don’t see yourself better there in the future.

                                The other workers? Maybe they don’t know, maybe they don’t care. But you do, you know and care enough to do something about it. And you’re capable of fixing this problem because your journal writing allows you to finally be honest with yourself about it.

                                2. Journals Improve Mental Clarity and Help Improve Your Focus

                                If there’s one thing journal writing is good for, it’s clearing the mental clutter.

                                How does it work? Simply, whenever you have a problem and write about it in a journal, you transfer the problem from your head to the paper. This empties the mind, allowing allocation of precious resources to problem-solving rather than problem-storing.

                                Let’s say you’ve been juggling several tasks at work. You’ve got data entry, testing, e-mails, problems with the boss, and so on—enough to overwhelm you—but as you start journal writing, things become clearer and easier to understand: Data entry can actually wait till Thursday; Bill kindly offered earlier to do my testing; For e-mails, I can check them now; the boss is just upset because Becky called in sick, etc.

                                You become better able to focus and reason your tasks out, and this is an indispensable and useful skill to have.

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                                3. Journals Improve Insight and Understanding

                                As a positive consequence of improving your mental clarity, you become more open to insights you may have missed before. As you write your notes out, you’re essentially having a dialogue with yourself. This draws out insights that you would have missed otherwise; it’s almost as if two people are working together to better understand each other. This kind of insight is only available to the person who has taken the time to connect with and understand themselves in the form of writing.

                                Once you’ve gotten a few entries written down, new insights can be gleaned from reading over them. What themes do you see in your life? Do you keep switching goals halfway through? Are you constantly dating the same type of people who aren’t good for you? Have you slowly but surely pushed people out of your life for fear of being hurt?

                                All of these questions can be answered by simply self-reflecting, but you can only discover the answers if you’ve captured them in writing. These questions are going to be tough to answer without a journal of your actions and experiences.

                                4. Journals Track Your Overall Development

                                Life happens, and it can happen fast. Sometimes we don’t take the time to stop and look around at what’s happening to us at each moment. We don’t get to see the step-by-step progress that we’re making in our own lives. So what happens? One day it’s the future, and you have no idea how you’ve gotten there.

                                Journal writing allows you to see how you’ve changed over time, so you can see where you did things right, and you can see where you took a misstep and fell.

                                The great thing about journals is that you’ll know what that misstep was, and you can make sure it doesn’t happen again—all because you made sure to log it, allowing yourself to learn from your mistakes.

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                                5. Journals Facilitate Personal Growth

                                The best thing about journal writing is that no matter what you end up writing about, it’s hard to not grow from it. You can’t just look at a past entry in which you acted shamefully and say “that was dumb, anyway!” No, we say “I will never make a dumb choice like that again!”

                                It’s impossible not to grow when it comes to journal writing. That’s what makes journal writing such a powerful tool, whether it’s about achieving goals, becoming a better person, or just general personal-development. No matter what you use it for, you’ll eventually see yourself growing as a person.

                                Kickstart Journaling

                                How can journaling best be of use to you? To vent your emotions? To help achieve your goals? To help clear your mind? What do you think makes journaling such a useful life skill?

                                Know the answer? Then it’s about time you reap the benefits of journal writing and start putting pen to paper.

                                Here’s what you can do to start journaling:

                                Featured photo credit: Jealous Weekends via unsplash.com

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