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15 Signs You’ve Found “The One”

15 Signs You’ve Found “The One”

How do you know when you’ve met “The One”? There is no fool proof way to know if the person you’re with is your soulmate, but there are often indicators and signs that you have met someone who you are extremely compatible with.

So we’ve found the clearest examples in these 15 signs that you’ve found “The One”.

1. You’re Willing To Improve Yourself

Both people in the relationship know they aren’t perfect, and are willing to work on their flaws and faults. Knowing that you both have areas you need to work on, from trying to be tidier or being better at communication, shows that you are both willing to improve yourselves, which is an important factor in relationships.

2. You Share Everything

Your partner wears your socks to work, and you always finish off their meals. You’ve been together so long you sometimes feel like you’re the same person – at least, that is what you tell your partner when you finish their sandwich.

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3. You Accept Each Other For Who You Are

Your partner isn’t bothered when you rant about why your favorite TV show was cancelled – in fact, they think it’s cute. Your partner appreciates all the little things you do, and they don’t want to change your personality. Instead of wanting you to fill their own personal expectations, they love you for just being you.

4. You Know Each Other’s Families And Friends

Your partner is always happy to join you for dinner with your parents or friends, whether they know them well or not. They know and love you, though, and so they want to forge relationships with the other people you love. From awkward family dinners to your best friend’s drunken birthday night out, they are always happy to be your plus one.

5. You Can’t Imagine Not Being Attracted To Your Partner

Whether you’ve been together for seven months or seven years, you can’t imagine not finding them sexy. You’re attracted to their imagination, their personality, their body, their face – everything.

6. You Are Supportive Of Each Other During Bad Times

Whether you have had a terrible day at work or you just feel upset, your partner is always there for you when you feel bad. From ordering your favorite take-out to listening to you rant and vent for two hours about that jerk boss of yours, there isn’t much they wouldn’t do to make sure you’re feeling better.

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7. You Trust Each Other

You trust your partner with everything, from being faithful to making sure your favorite chocolate is in the cupboard. You don’t worry about your partners actions; in fact, you trust them to always make good decisions. Instead of worrying about feelings of resentment and misunderstandings, you feel supported in the knowledge that your partner won’t let you down.

8. You Have Taken A Trip Together Without Falling Out

Spending the evening with your partner can be a lot of fun, but a solid week together can be much more challenging. Trips can be exhausting, and filled with ups and downs, but your partner doesn’t take this out on you. Instead of having a meltdown in the airport, they subtly let you how happy they are to spend the time with you.

9. You Don’t Struggle To Show Your Emotions

If you have had a terrible day at work, you don’t feel like you need to fake a smile when you get home. In fact, it’s much more likely your partner will open a bottle of wine while you grumble from the sofa – which is perfect.

Although you don’t let your emotions rule you, you understand it is important and healthy to express how you feel. If you feel sad, happy or angry, you let your partner know, and you always try to be aware of your partner’s emotions and feelings.

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10. You’re Both Fine With Sitting In Silence

You both understand the importance of silence. After all of the time you’ve spent together, silences are never awkward. In fact, sometimes there’s nothing you want more than a long, quiet hug.

11. You’re Interested In Each Other, Rather Than Material Things

You know you would still be with your partner if they lost their home or job, and vice versa. You love each other purely for who you are, rather than the money or possessions you each bring to the relationship.

12. You Are Happy To Treat Each Other

You don’t resent doing things to make your partner happy, even if you like different things. From taking them to their favorite department stores, to cooking them dinner, making your partner feel good makes you feel great.

13. You Always Answer Their Calls – Even at 3AM

You’re used to receiving drunken phonecalls from your partner in the early hours of the morning. You know they are probably just drunk, and they probably don’t have anything important to tell you, but you’re willing to lose out on some sleep if it means you get to speak to them.

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14. You Never Feel Like They Aren’t Listening To You

Remember screaming fights in the middle of the night with earlier partners, when you felt like they weren’t listening to you? When you’ve met the one, you will still fight, but each fight is also a conversation about how to fix any issues, rather than feeling like you’re screaming at a wall. Most of your fights are calm and constructive talking, instead of shouting over each other.

15. You’re Best Friends As Well As Partners

You make time to go on romantic trips and dates, but you’re just as happy to slob out in your jogging bottoms watching the new season of Game Of Thrones together. Sometimes you act like a couple, and sometimes you act like childish best friends, and you wouldn’t change a single thing.

Do you know any signs that you’ve found “The One”? Comment your ideas below!

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Amy Johnson

Freelance writer, editor and social media manager.

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Last Updated on December 17, 2018

Why You Think You’re Not Good Enough and How To Believe in Yourself

Why You Think You’re Not Good Enough and How To Believe in Yourself

Have you ever wanted to say something at work, but a little voice of doubt crept in and said, “what if you are wrong”?

Maybe you wanted to apply for that promotion or ask that special someone on a date, but something kept you from taking action. When you think you’re not good enough, you tend to fear the outcome and lack faith in your abilities. That is why it is vital you discover how to believe in yourself so you can accomplish your goals and create your dream life.

Whatever your situation, the fears and self-doubt your false beliefs create will always stop you in your tracks. Identifying the beliefs that cause you to sabotage your life is the first step to removing them.

Self-doubt causes inaction, and inaction leads to regret. When you are not following your passion and living your dream life, you are left with a lot of questions:

  • What if I took a chance on myself?
  • Could I have had a better life if I took more risks?
  • Am I be satisfied with the legacy I am leaving behind?
  • What could I have accomplished if I did not settle for less?

So why would you think you’re not good enough?

1. Parenting

The perception you have of yourself is based on your past experiences. There are studies that show children mimic everything from their parents ability to regulate emotions, to their parents belief about money.[1]

I have had clients who did not believe they were good enough because they did not receive any positive reinforcement as a child. When they were young, their parents were extremely overprotective.

Think of your childhood challenges like dragons you had to slay. Each obstacle you overcame was another dragon you successfully removed from your life. As you slay more dragons, your self-esteem and confidence increase. When someone has overprotective parents, their parents end up slaying the dragons.

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As a result, the child builds more confidence in their parent’s abilities, while still doubting their own.

If you are never encouraged to slay your own dragons, you start to doubt whether you can. It is only natural for a child to conclude their parents are always helping them because they think they need it. This child ages into an adult who still believes they are not good enough. They seek the help and confirmation of others, and they rarely stand-up to opposition.

Solution: Slay Your Dragons!

If you want to believe in yourself, you are going to have to take steps to rebuild your trust in yourself. Start by keeping your word to others and arriving on-time. By showing yourself that others can (and do) trust you, you are going to feel more comfortable trusting yourself.

As you move onto larger and more challenging tasks, you have built a foundation of trust in your ability to keep your word. Next, you are going to want to reclaim your sword from others. At first, you may want to confide in whoever it is currently slaying your dragons.

Understand if it is your parent or someone who loves you, they want the best for you and mean well. You are simply going to tell them that you want to do the work, and will ask them for their thoughts in the planning phase. Feel free to check in with them and give them updates on your progress, while making sure they understand you are wanting to do the work yourself.

Then when the task is completed, let them know so you can celebrate together. Now that you have slayed your own dragon, you can start to reclaim your confidence. By you utilizing them as your guide, you get the added bonus of someone you respect and admire, telling you how amazing you are.

Think of it like a symbolic passing of the torch. Now, you are both dragon slayers. Which means all the positive attributes you attributed to them slaying your dragons, now belong to you.

2. Over-Exaggerating and Oversimplifying

Your past experiences may involve you or someone close to you failing. When you experience failure, you can lose your desire to continue. This has less to do with whether you are brave or scared, and more to do with the fact that your mind does not like failure.

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No one enjoys participating in events in which they under-perform. Outside of the usual reasons of embarrassment, feelings of inadequacy, and fear of failure – it is simply not fun.

Who wants to play baseball if they strikeout every time it is their turn? Would you enjoy singing in front of an audience if you were booed off the stage every time you performed? I could go on, but I think you get the point.

The thing about those two examples is no one really strikes out “every” at-bat. It is also unlikely someone could be booed off the stage “every time” they performed in-front of an audience.

What ends up happening is you oversimplify and exaggerate your past experiences and then your mind believes you. If you believe you are not good enough to ask someone on a date because they “always” tell you no, then do not be surprised you never muster the courage to do so.

If you want to overcome these feelings of inadequacy, start by changing your beliefs. This exercise does not need to be complicated. If you believe you strikeout every time it is your turn, I want to you to go to a batting cage and keep swinging until you hit the baseball.

When you experience success, I want you to take a mental note, write it down, or have someone video it. This is your proof that you do not always strike out. Then, whenever your belief that you are not good enough resurfaces, you are going to replay that video.

Regardless of the situation, you can find a successful experience that you are overlooking.

Solution: Read About the Failures of Others

It sounds a little crazy, I know, but reading about the failures of other successful people will improve your confidence. In a study conducted by Columbia University, they found that teaching students about the failures of great scientists encouraged them to do better.[2]

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When you are battling fear and self-doubt, you tend to over-exaggerate the abilities of others and diminish your own by comparison. You start to believe the successful are successful because they are courageous risk-takers, who do not take no for an answer. You tell yourself, they are meant to succeed, while you on the other hand are not.

When you are able to relate to the successful, you start to realize they have the same struggles and challenges you do. The only difference is they kept going.

Now it is not a question of whether you can succeed, it is a question of whether you want to succeed.

3. Undervalue Yourself

What is the main difference between someone who believes they are good enough and someone who does not? The person who believes they are good enough understands they are a person of value.

What I mean by this is if you do not believe you are worth being listened to, you will not have anything to say. If you do not believe you are good enough to be respected and treated as such, you will accept and rationalize all kinds of mistreatment.

There is an old saying that we are treated as we allow ourselves to be treated. When someone has the confidence and self-esteem that commands respect, they will not accept being treated any kind of way. However, if someone does not see themselves as worthy, they will remain in toxic situations because they do not believe anything better is on the horizon.

Dr. Jennifer Crocker, who worked on a series of self-esteem studies, found in her latest research that:[3]

“College students who based their self-worth on external sources–including appearance, approval from others and even their academic performance–reported more stress, anger, academic problems, relationship conflicts, and had higher levels of drug and alcohol use and symptoms of eating disorders”

Solution: Internalize Your Self-Worth

Instead of valuing yourself based on the awards, recognition, and accolades of others, you need to search internally. By basing your perception of yourself on your core values, you can regain control over self-image.

Instead of focusing on things that are outside of control, keep your mind on what it is that makes you special. You are not defined by your job, relationships, religion, or education. Rather, you are defined by the manner in which you participate in these things. You may be a creative, hard-working, and compassionate person; and that shows up in every thing you do.

Understand that you do not need to be creative, hard-working, and compassionate all the time to consider yourself these things. You are not trying to be perfect, but you are trying to connect with your true self.

By understanding the similarities in which you tackle objectives, you will build a consistent and powerful self-worth that stands apart from external confirmation.

Final Thoughts

Do not allow your past experiences do dictate your future success. You do not want to look back on your life and have a lot of questions and regrets.

Build trust in yourself by taking action today. This will help you build the confidence you need to believe in yourself and your ability to become the champion of your life.

More Inspiration About Motivation

Featured photo credit: Riccardo Mion via unsplash.com

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