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15 Signs You’ve Found “The One”

15 Signs You’ve Found “The One”

How do you know when you’ve met “The One”? There is no fool proof way to know if the person you’re with is your soulmate, but there are often indicators and signs that you have met someone who you are extremely compatible with.

So we’ve found the clearest examples in these 15 signs that you’ve found “The One”.

1. You’re Willing To Improve Yourself

Both people in the relationship know they aren’t perfect, and are willing to work on their flaws and faults. Knowing that you both have areas you need to work on, from trying to be tidier or being better at communication, shows that you are both willing to improve yourselves, which is an important factor in relationships.

2. You Share Everything

Your partner wears your socks to work, and you always finish off their meals. You’ve been together so long you sometimes feel like you’re the same person – at least, that is what you tell your partner when you finish their sandwich.

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3. You Accept Each Other For Who You Are

Your partner isn’t bothered when you rant about why your favorite TV show was cancelled – in fact, they think it’s cute. Your partner appreciates all the little things you do, and they don’t want to change your personality. Instead of wanting you to fill their own personal expectations, they love you for just being you.

4. You Know Each Other’s Families And Friends

Your partner is always happy to join you for dinner with your parents or friends, whether they know them well or not. They know and love you, though, and so they want to forge relationships with the other people you love. From awkward family dinners to your best friend’s drunken birthday night out, they are always happy to be your plus one.

5. You Can’t Imagine Not Being Attracted To Your Partner

Whether you’ve been together for seven months or seven years, you can’t imagine not finding them sexy. You’re attracted to their imagination, their personality, their body, their face – everything.

6. You Are Supportive Of Each Other During Bad Times

Whether you have had a terrible day at work or you just feel upset, your partner is always there for you when you feel bad. From ordering your favorite take-out to listening to you rant and vent for two hours about that jerk boss of yours, there isn’t much they wouldn’t do to make sure you’re feeling better.

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7. You Trust Each Other

You trust your partner with everything, from being faithful to making sure your favorite chocolate is in the cupboard. You don’t worry about your partners actions; in fact, you trust them to always make good decisions. Instead of worrying about feelings of resentment and misunderstandings, you feel supported in the knowledge that your partner won’t let you down.

8. You Have Taken A Trip Together Without Falling Out

Spending the evening with your partner can be a lot of fun, but a solid week together can be much more challenging. Trips can be exhausting, and filled with ups and downs, but your partner doesn’t take this out on you. Instead of having a meltdown in the airport, they subtly let you how happy they are to spend the time with you.

9. You Don’t Struggle To Show Your Emotions

If you have had a terrible day at work, you don’t feel like you need to fake a smile when you get home. In fact, it’s much more likely your partner will open a bottle of wine while you grumble from the sofa – which is perfect.

Although you don’t let your emotions rule you, you understand it is important and healthy to express how you feel. If you feel sad, happy or angry, you let your partner know, and you always try to be aware of your partner’s emotions and feelings.

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10. You’re Both Fine With Sitting In Silence

You both understand the importance of silence. After all of the time you’ve spent together, silences are never awkward. In fact, sometimes there’s nothing you want more than a long, quiet hug.

11. You’re Interested In Each Other, Rather Than Material Things

You know you would still be with your partner if they lost their home or job, and vice versa. You love each other purely for who you are, rather than the money or possessions you each bring to the relationship.

12. You Are Happy To Treat Each Other

You don’t resent doing things to make your partner happy, even if you like different things. From taking them to their favorite department stores, to cooking them dinner, making your partner feel good makes you feel great.

13. You Always Answer Their Calls – Even at 3AM

You’re used to receiving drunken phonecalls from your partner in the early hours of the morning. You know they are probably just drunk, and they probably don’t have anything important to tell you, but you’re willing to lose out on some sleep if it means you get to speak to them.

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14. You Never Feel Like They Aren’t Listening To You

Remember screaming fights in the middle of the night with earlier partners, when you felt like they weren’t listening to you? When you’ve met the one, you will still fight, but each fight is also a conversation about how to fix any issues, rather than feeling like you’re screaming at a wall. Most of your fights are calm and constructive talking, instead of shouting over each other.

15. You’re Best Friends As Well As Partners

You make time to go on romantic trips and dates, but you’re just as happy to slob out in your jogging bottoms watching the new season of Game Of Thrones together. Sometimes you act like a couple, and sometimes you act like childish best friends, and you wouldn’t change a single thing.

Do you know any signs that you’ve found “The One”? Comment your ideas below!

More by this author

Amy Johnson

Amy is a writer who blogs about relationships and lifestyle advice.

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Last Updated on July 20, 2021

How to Overcome the Fear of Public Speaking (A Step-by-Step Guide)

How to Overcome the Fear of Public Speaking (A Step-by-Step Guide)

You’re standing behind the curtain, just about to make your way on stage to face the many faces half-shrouded in darkness in front of you. As you move towards the spotlight, your body starts to feel heavier with each step. A familiar thump echoes throughout your body – your heartbeat has gone off the charts.

Don’t worry, you’re not the only one with glossophobia(also known as speech anxiety or the fear of speaking to large crowds). Sometimes, the anxiety happens long before you even stand on stage.

Your body’s defence mechanism responds by causing a part of your brain to release adrenaline into your blood – the same chemical that gets released as if you were being chased by a lion.

Here’s a step-by-step guide to help you overcome your fear of public speaking:

1. Prepare yourself mentally and physically

According to experts, we’re built to display anxiety and to recognize it in others. If your body and mind are anxious, your audience will notice. Hence, it’s important to prepare yourself before the big show so that you arrive on stage confident, collected and ready.

“Your outside world is a reflection of your inside world. What goes on in the inside, shows on the outside.” – Bob Proctor

Exercising lightly before a presentation helps get your blood circulating and sends oxygen to the brain. Mental exercises, on the other hand, can help calm the mind and nerves. Here are some useful ways to calm your racing heart when you start to feel the butterflies in your stomach:

Warming up

If you’re nervous, chances are your body will feel the same way. Your body gets tense, your muscles feel tight or you’re breaking in cold sweat. The audience will notice you are nervous.

If you observe that this is exactly what is happening to you minutes before a speech, do a couple of stretches to loosen and relax your body. It’s better to warm up before every speech as it helps to increase the functional potential of the body as a whole. Not only that, it increases muscle efficiency, improves reaction time and your movements.

Here are some exercises to loosen up your body before show time:

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  1. Neck and shoulder rolls – This helps relieve upper body muscle tension and pressure as the rolls focus on rotating the head and shoulders, loosening the muscle. Stress and anxiety can make us rigid within this area which can make you feel agitated, especially when standing.
  2. Arm stretches – We often use this part of our muscles during a speech or presentation through our hand gestures and movements. Stretching these muscles can reduce arm fatigue, loosen you up and improve your body language range.
  3. Waist twists – Place your hands on your hips and rotate your waist in a circular motion. This exercise focuses on loosening the abdominal and lower back regions which is essential as it can cause discomfort and pain, further amplifying any anxieties you may experience.

Stay hydrated

Ever felt parched seconds before speaking? And then coming up on stage sounding raspy and scratchy in front of the audience? This happens because the adrenaline from stage fright causes your mouth to feel dried out.

To prevent all that, it’s essential we stay adequately hydrated before a speech. A sip of water will do the trick. However, do drink in moderation so that you won’t need to go to the bathroom constantly.

Try to avoid sugary beverages and caffeine, since it’s a diuretic – meaning you’ll feel thirstier. It will also amplify your anxiety which prevents you from speaking smoothly.

Meditate

Meditation is well-known as a powerful tool to calm the mind. ABC’s Dan Harris, co-anchor of Nightline and Good Morning America weekend and author of the book titled10% Happier , recommends that meditation can help individuals to feel significantly calmer, faster.

Meditation is like a workout for your mind. It gives you the strength and focus to filter out the negativity and distractions with words of encouragement, confidence and strength.

Mindfulness meditation, in particular, is a popular method to calm yourself before going up on the big stage. The practice involves sitting comfortably, focusing on your breathing and then bringing your mind’s attention to the present without drifting into concerns about the past or future – which likely includes floundering on stage.

Here’s a nice example of guided meditation before public speaking:

2. Focus on your goal

One thing people with a fear of public speaking have in common is focusing too much on themselves and the possibility of failure.

Do I look funny? What if I can’t remember what to say? Do I look stupid? Will people listen to me? Does anyone care about what I’m talking about?’

Instead of thinking this way, shift your attention to your one true purpose – contributing something of value to your audience.

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Decide on the progress you’d like your audience to make after your presentation. Notice their movements and expressions to adapt your speech to ensure that they are having a good time to leave the room as better people.

If your own focus isn’t beneficial and what it should be when you’re speaking, then shift it to what does. This is also key to establishing trust during your presentation as the audience can clearly see that you have their interests at heart.[1]

3. Convert negativity to positivity

There are two sides constantly battling inside of us – one is filled with strength and courage while the other is doubt and insecurities. Which one will you feed?

‘What if I mess up this speech? What if I’m not funny enough? What if I forget what to say?’

It’s no wonder why many of us are uncomfortable giving a presentation. All we do is bring ourselves down before we got a chance to prove ourselves. This is also known as a self-fulfilling prophecy – a belief that comes true because we are acting as if it already is. If you think you’re incompetent, then it will eventually become true.

Motivational coaches tout that positive mantras and affirmations tend to boost your confidents for the moments that matter most. Say to yourself: “I’ll ace this speech and I can do it!”

Take advantage of your adrenaline rush to encourage positive outcome rather than thinking of the negative ‘what ifs’.

Here’s a video of Psychologist Kelly McGonigal who encourages her audience to turn stress into something positive as well as provide methods on how to cope with it:

4. Understand your content

Knowing your content at your fingertips helps reduce your anxiety because there is one less thing to worry about. One way to get there is to practice numerous times before your actual speech.

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However, memorizing your script word-for-word is not encouraged. You can end up freezing should you forget something. You’ll also risk sounding unnatural and less approachable.

“No amount of reading or memorizing will make you successful in life. It is the understanding and the application of wise thought that counts.” – Bob Proctor

Many people unconsciously make the mistake of reading from their slides or memorizing their script word-for-word without understanding their content – a definite way to stress themselves out.

Understanding your speech flow and content makes it easier for you to convert ideas and concepts into your own words which you can then clearly explain to others in a conversational manner. Designing your slides to include text prompts is also an easy hack to ensure you get to quickly recall your flow when your mind goes blank.[2]

One way to understand is to memorize the over-arching concepts or ideas in your pitch. It helps you speak more naturally and let your personality shine through. It’s almost like taking your audience on a journey with a few key milestones.

5. Practice makes perfect

Like most people, many of us are not naturally attuned to public speaking. Rarely do individuals walk up to a large audience and present flawlessly without any research and preparation.

In fact, some of the top presenters make it look easy during showtime because they have spent countless hours behind-the-scenes in deep practice. Even great speakers like the late John F. Kennedy would spend months preparing his speech beforehand.

Public speaking, like any other skill, requires practice – whether it be practicing your speech countless of times in front of a mirror or making notes. As the saying goes, practice makes perfect!

6. Be authentic

There’s nothing wrong with feeling stressed before going up to speak in front of an audience.

Many people fear public speaking because they fear others will judge them for showing their true, vulnerable self. However, vulnerability can sometimes help you come across as more authentic and relatable as a speaker.

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Drop the pretence of trying to act or speak like someone else and you’ll find that it’s worth the risk. You become more genuine, flexible and spontaneous, which makes it easier to handle unpredictable situations – whether it’s getting tough questions from the crowd or experiencing an unexpected technical difficulty.

To find out your authentic style of speaking is easy. Just pick a topic or issue you are passionate about and discuss this like you normally would with a close family or friend. It is like having a conversation with someone in a personal one-to-one setting. A great way to do this on stage is to select a random audience member(with a hopefully calming face) and speak to a single person at a time during your speech. You’ll find that it’s easier trying to connect to one person at a time than a whole room.

With that said, being comfortable enough to be yourself in front of others may take a little time and some experience, depending how comfortable you are with being yourself in front of others. But once you embrace it, stage fright will not be as intimidating as you initially thought.

Presenters like Barack Obama are a prime example of a genuine and passionate speaker:

7. Post speech evaluation

Last but not the least, if you’ve done public speaking and have been scarred from a bad experience, try seeing it as a lesson learned to improve yourself as a speaker.

Don’t beat yourself up after a presentation

We are the hardest on ourselves and it’s good to be. But when you finish delivering your speech or presentation, give yourself some recognition and a pat on the back.

You managed to finish whatever you had to do and did not give up. You did not let your fears and insecurities get to you. Take a little more pride in your work and believe in yourself.

Improve your next speech

As mentioned before, practice does make perfect. If you want to improve your public speaking skills, try asking someone to film you during a speech or presentation. Afterwards, watch and observe what you can do to improve yourself next time.

Here are some questions you can ask yourself after every speech:

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  • How did I do?
  • Are there any areas for improvement?
  • Did I sound or look stressed?
  • Did I stumble on my words? Why?
  • Was I saying “um” too often?
  • How was the flow of the speech?

Write everything you observed down and keep practicing and improving. In time, you’ll be able to better manage your fears of public speaking and appear more confident when it counts.

If you want even more tips about public speaking or delivering a great presentation, check out these articles too:

Reference

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