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15 Signs That You’re Leading A Successful Life

15 Signs That You’re Leading A Successful Life

While the nature of success may be relative to each individual, its presence also leaves a series of tell-tale signs and portents. Recognizing the fundamental aspects of success can enable you to evaluate your life at any given time, allowing you to consolidate while also laying the foundations for further self-improvement.

With this in mind, let’s take a look at 15 signs that suggest you are living a successful and fulfilled life. Consider the following.

1. You are constantly looking to learn and evolve.

Regardless of the form that it takes, success often breeds a desire for further attainment. This will usually manifest itself in a desire to learn and evolve as an individual, whether you look to develop relevant professional skills or seek out knowledge on subjects that interest you on a personal level. Either way, the desire to learn is often an indication that you are enjoying a rich and fulfilling life.

2. You are able to embrace continuous change.

Continued success will cause your life to evolve, which will bring both benefits and challenges in equal measure. While this can be daunting to those without a positive or proactive mind-set, it is important to remember that change remains an inevitable consequence of personal or professional attainment. By recognizing change as a sign of growth and success, you can embrace it fully and without inhibition.

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3. You are open to new and unfamiliar ways of thinking.

On a similar note, anyone who dreams of achieving sustained success must react positively to change in addition to embracing its theoretical benefits. If you remain open to new and evolutionary ways of thinking, for example, this is generally an indication that you are a successful and forward-thinking individual who is capable of thriving regardless of the circumstances that envelop you.

4. You are able to trust your instincts.

Whether you are evaluating a business or personal decision, instinct remains one of your most innate governing senses. It only ever presents itself sporadically, however, meaning that many choose to ignore their instincts and rely instead on alternative decision-making criteria. Individuals who are successful tend to trust their instinct more, however, as they have experience with using gut feeling to influence critical financial and lifestyle decisions.

5. You are in touch with technological advancement.

The pace of technological advancement has been rapid since the turn of the century, and it is only going to gather further momentum in the years ahead. Successful individuals tend to remain at the cutting edge of innovation, both in terms of their professional and personal endeavors, as this helps them to achieve their goals in a world dominated by technology. If you maintain an affinity with technological development, chances are, you are living a fulfilled and interactive existence.

6. You want to give back to society and those around you.

In the quest for success, it may be necessary to make sacrifices and adopt an insular mind-set. This is true whether you are looking to climb the corporate ladder or become a more productive and rounded individual, and your journey towards fulfillment can be extremely isolating and challenging. That said, those who have begun to enjoy success and achieve their goals tend to develop a more collaborative outlook, as they look to give something back to loved ones and society as a whole.

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7. You take care of your appearance and physical health.

The pursuit of success and individual goals can also be time-consuming, which means that it can be difficult to make time for recreational hobbies. Once you have a more contented and fulfilled life, however, you are likely to have a relaxed schedule that allows for personal endeavors. As a result of this, you can take greater care of your appearance and develop a fitness regime that maintains physical well-being. This is a sure-fire sign of success in the modern world.

8. You respect those around you regardless of their social standing.

Both professional and personal success is based on the cultivation of positive relationships, which in turns demands a great deal of mutual respect between each individual party. Having the capacity to respect and empathize with those around you is therefore a clear indication that you are enjoying a successful and well-balanced life, especially when applied to those who have a lower social standing.

9. You have a positive bank balance.

While it is naive to suggest that success can be measured by financial wealth alone, it is often a clear indication that your career is embarking along an upward curve. After all, promotions and improved roles of employment tend to deliver higher rates of annual remuneration, so a healthy and positive bank balance suggests that you have already attained a number of professional goals.

10. You are ready to find love and commit to a long-term relationship.

Some may consider the pursuit of success to be an individual past-time, as you are forced to focus on your own needs rather than those of the people around you. This is why people who have achieved success find it easier to commit to a long-term relationship, as they have already laid the foundations for a secure and enjoyable future. If you have reached this juncture, you may consider yourself to have a relatively fulfilled existence.

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11. You are a self-confident and resourceful individual.

The course of your life is determined by individual experiences, which also have an impact on your psychological outlook. Successful people tend to be extremely self-confident and resourceful, for example, as they have survived both negative and positive experiences and used these to reinforce their self-belief. If you display these qualities, chances are, you have attained at least some level of success over time.

12. You are a happy and contented in your own company.

If you have regrets or aspects of your life that you are dissatisfied with, there are times when these feelings will be exposed. Whenever you spend time alone and in your own company, for example, you will be vulnerable to introspective thoughts and intense self-evaluation as you look to improve the quality of your life. If you are happy and contented in your own company, however, it is likely that you are a relatively successful individual.

13. You are constantly setting new and exciting goals.

As any dedicated and successful sports star will testify, the ability to set new goals on a regular basis holds the key to long-term achievement. Without this, you are likely to stagnate and come to a standstill as you follow your predetermined course. So if you find yourself in a position where you are constantly redefining your life’s course and setting brand new goals, you will have already achieved a considerable amount of success.

14. You struggle to maintain your hunger for success.

On a similar note, the achievement of interim success can do a great deal to dampen your hunger for further attainment. Feeling occasionally detached from your achievements and experiencing a lack of motivation are both typical consequences of being successful, and it is how you deal with these that will determine whether you continue to achieve over a prolonged period of time.

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15. You have a keen sense of perspective.

On a final note, it is important to consider how success creates a keener sense of perspective. This is because the pursuit of success requires you to establish clearly defined goals and priorities, while the sacrifices that you make enable you to understand what is truly important in life. So if you have achieved any form of success, you will have the ability to carefully evaluate situations and respond appropriately.

The Last Word

If you have enjoyed a prosperous and successful life, these tell-tale signs will certainly give the game away. So while each individual’s interpretation of success will vary, it is possible to measure your level of attainment by using several core and universal metrics.

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Last Updated on January 24, 2021

How to Say No When You Know You Say Yes Too Often

How to Say No When You Know You Say Yes Too Often

Do you say yes so often that you no longer feel that your own needs are being met? Are you wondering how to say no to people?

For years, I was a serial people pleaser[1]. Known as someone who would step up, I would gladly make time, especially when it came to volunteering for certain causes. I proudly carried this role all through grade school, college, even through law school. For years, I thought saying “no” meant I would disappoint a good friend or someone I respected.

But somewhere along the way, I noticed I wasn’t quite living my life. Instead, I seem to have created a schedule that was a strange combination of meeting the expectations of others, what I thought I should be doing, and some of what I actually wanted to do. The result? I had a packed schedule that left me overwhelmed and unfulfilled.

It took a long while, but I learned the art of saying no. Saying no meant I no longer catered fully to everyone else’s needs and could make more room for what I really wanted to do. Instead of cramming too much in, I chose to pursue what really mattered. When that happened, I became a lot happier.

And guess what? I hardly disappointed anyone.

The Importance of Saying No

When you learn the art of saying no, you begin to look at the world differently. Rather than seeing all of the things you could or should be doing (and aren’t doing), you start to look at how to say yes to what’s important.

In other words, you aren’t just reacting to what life throws at you. You seek the opportunities that move you to where you want to be.

Successful people aren’t afraid to say no. Oprah Winfrey, considered one of the most successful women in the world, confessed that it was much later in life when she learned how to say no. Even after she had become internationally famous, she felt she had to say yes to virtually everything.

Being able to say no also helps you manage your time better.

Warren Buffett views “no” as essential to his success. He said:

“The difference between successful people and really successful people is that really successful people say no to almost everything.”

When I made “no” a part of my toolbox, I drove more of my own success, focusing on fewer things and doing them well.

How We Are Pressured to Say Yes

It’s no wonder a lot of us find it hard to say no.

From an early age, we are conditioned to say yes. We said yes probably hundreds of times in order to graduate from high school and then get into college. We said yes to find work, to get a promotion, to find love and then yes again to stay in a relationship. We said yes to find and keep friends.

We say yes because we feel good when we help someone, because it can seem like the right thing to do, because we think that is key to success, and because the request might come from someone who is hard to resist.

And that’s not all. The pressure to say yes doesn’t just come from others. We put a lot of pressure on ourselves.

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At work, we say yes because we compare ourselves to others who seem to be doing more than we are. Outside of work, we say yes because we are feeling bad that we aren’t doing enough to spend time with family or friends.

The message, no matter where we turn, is nearly always, “You really could be doing more.” The result? When people ask us for our time, we are heavily conditioned to say yes.

How Do You Say No Without Feeling Guilty?

Deciding to add the word “no” to your toolbox is no small thing. Perhaps you already say no, but not as much as you would like. Maybe you have an instinct that if you were to learn the art of no that you could finally create more time for things you care about.

But let’s be honest, using the word “no” doesn’t come easily for many people.

3 Rules of Thumbs for Saying No

1. You Need to Get Out of Your Comfort Zone

Let’s face it. It is hard to say no. Setting boundaries around your time, especially you haven’t done it much in the past, will feel awkward. Your comfort zone is “yes,” so it’s time to challenge that and step outside that.

If you need help getting out of your comfort zone, check out this article.

2. You Are the Air Traffic Controller of Your Time

When you want to learn how to say no, remember that you are the only one who understands the demands for your time. Think about it: who else knows about all of the demands in your life? No one.

Only you are at the center of all of these requests. You are the only one that understands what time you really have.

3. Saying No Means Saying Yes to Something That Matters

When we decide not to do something, it means we can say yes to something else that we may care more about. You have a unique opportunity to decide how you spend your precious time.

6 Ways to Start Saying No

Incorporating that little word “no” into your life can be transformational. Turning some things down will mean you can open doors to what really matters. Here are some essential tips to learn the art of no:

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1. Check in With Your Obligation Meter

One of the biggest challenges to saying no is a feeling of obligation. Do you feel you have a responsibility to say yes and worry that saying no will reflect poorly on you?

Ask yourself whether you truly have the duty to say yes. Check your assumptions or beliefs about whether you carry the responsibility to say yes. Turn it around and instead ask what duty you owe to yourself.

2. Resist the Fear of Missing out (FOMO)

Do you have a fear of missing out (FOMO)? FOMO can follow us around in so many ways. At work, we volunteer our time because we fear we won’t move ahead. In our personal lives, we agree to join the crowd because of FOMO, even while we ourselves aren’t enjoying the fun.

Check in with yourself. Are you saying yes because of FOMO or because you really want to say yes? More often than not, running after fear doesn’t make us feel better[2].

3. Check Your Assumptions About What It Means to Say No

Do you dread the reaction you will get if you say no? Often, we say yes because we worry about how others will respond or because of the consequences. We may be afraid to disappoint others or think we will lose their respect. We often forget how much we are disappointing ourselves along the way.

Keep in mind that saying no can be exactly what is needed to send the right message that you have limited time. In the tips below, you will see how to communicate your no in a gentle and loving way.

You might disappoint someone initially, but drawing a boundary can bring you the freedom you need so that you can give freely of yourself when you truly want to. And it will often help others have more respect for you and your boundaries, not less.

4. When the Request Comes in, Sit on It

Sometimes, when we are in the moment, we instinctively agree. The request might make sense at first. Or we typically have said yes to this request in the past.

Give yourself a little time to reflect on whether you really have the time or can do the task properly. You may decide the best option is to say no. There is no harm in giving yourself the time to decide.

5. Communicate Your “No” with Transparency and Kindness

When you are ready to tell someone no, communicate your decision clearly. The message can be open and honest[3] to ensure the recipient that your reasons have to do with your limited time.

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How do you say no? 9 Healthy Ways to Say “No”

    Resist the temptation not to respond or communicate all. But do not feel obligated to provide a lengthy account about why you are saying no.

    Clear communication with a short explanation is all that is needed. I have found it useful to tell people that I have many demands and need to be careful with how I allocate my time. I will sometimes say I really appreciate that they came to me and for them to check in again if the opportunity arises another time.

    6. Consider How to Use a Modified No

    If you are under pressure to say yes but want to say no, you may want to consider downgrading a “yes” to a “yes but…” as this will give you an opportunity to condition your agreement to what works best for you.

    Sometimes, the condition can be to do the task, but not in the time frame that was originally requested. Or perhaps you can do part of what has been asked.

    Final Thoughts

    Beginning right now, you can change how you respond to requests for your time. When the request comes in, take yourself off autopilot where you might normally say yes.

    Use the request as a way to draw a healthy boundary around your time. Pay particular attention to when you place certain demands on yourself.

    Try it now. Say no to a friend who continues to take advantage of your goodwill. Or, draw the line with a workaholic colleague and tell them you will complete the project, but not by working all weekend. You’ll find yourself much happier.

    More Tips on How to Say No

    Featured photo credit: Chris Ainsworth via unsplash.com

    Reference

    [1] Science of People: 11 Expert Tips to Stop Being a People Pleaser and Start Doing You
    [2] Anxiety and Depression Association of America: Tips to Get Over Your FOMO, or Fear of Missing Out
    [3] Cooks Hill Counseling: 9 Healthy Ways to Say “No”

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