Advertising
Advertising

15 Reasons Why The Middle Child Is Always Likeable

15 Reasons Why The Middle Child Is Always Likeable

The middle child, the balancer, the keeper of peace, the glue that holds the family together… however you want to say it, their role is intrinsic to the health and well being of the family. Research shows that the middle child is always likeable.

1. They have a strong work ethic.

Middle children have some of the strongest work ethics out of anyone. It makes sense! From a young age, their role between the trailblazer oldest and rambunctious youngest make them hard workers. Nothing brand new has ever been given to them. They learn that things don’t come easy, and that you have to work for everything.

2. They are peace-keepers.

Middle children are caught in a very unique role between two strong personalities. Without them, order would be non-fluent and turmoil among sibling children would always exist. They dilute both the oldest and youngest’s personalities. They tend to be agreeable and look to please others in the family. This “with the grain” behavior is what makes them crucial to every family dynamic.

Advertising

3. They are independent.

No matter the circumstance, the middle child will rarely complain about being bored. The middle child know how to entertain themselves and more importantly, he is comfortable being alone. He doesn’t rely on others to provide all of his joy; he is completely content in findings things to do or just staying in and watching a move on a Saturday night.

4. They are extremely creative.

When it comes to being handy or just having a knack for design, a middle child knows whats best. They’re very introspective people, and with this comes a deep sense of right and wrong. She knows what she wants before she creates something; she rarely struggles to craft works of art from nothing. A blank canvas is seen as an opportunity in her eyes while it can be intimidating for the rest of us. If there is a way to improve design and function of a tool or device, it is almost guaranteed that a middle child came up with it.

5. They are easygoing.

Middle children know how to go with the flow. They don’t want to rock the boat or create conflict. This makes them some of the best companions on adventures. They won’t have their own agenda, they want to do whatever you want to do and they will enjoy it just the same. This is an extremely likeable treat, people want to include middle children in their plans.

Advertising

6. They are intelligent.

A middle child knows logic, and reasoning with great understanding. He is well read and knows what he is talking about. He can expand your mind with philosophy and teach you complex topics with ease. Also, think before you try to argue with a middle child, they know their stuff.

7. They know how to pick their battles.

Know exactly what you want to say before you argue with a middle child, they have a way of knowing what hill they want to die on. This can be surprising to what we know of the usual “go with the flow” attitude of the middle child. This is what is so great about middle children though, they don’t pick petty arguments, they don’t nit pick about everything. They are concise and calculated. If they are upset about something, then it is something serious. They know their reasons and they know how to deliver them.

8. They are reliable.

Middle children know the strife of being forgotten. They know the meaning of “ten minutes early is on time.” You can always count on a middle child to be there when you need them. They are never flaky and if you ask them to do something, you will never have to worry otherwise.

Advertising

9. They are resourceful.

If you need a problem solver, look no further than the middle child. They have grown up with hand-me-down toys and clothing. They know how to make things work in a pinch. This skill is innate to them, almost like breathing, they are rarely flustered with a difficult situation or circumstance.

10. They are negotiators.

Middle children know how to pick their battles but more importantly they know how to compromise. Growing up in a household where everything is shared teaches many great life lessons. At a young age, they always had to share their toys with their siblings. As they grow up, they know how to compromise and reach understandings. This is what makes them great members of any company or team.

11. They are selfless.

This is one of the most admirable traits of middle children. They know how to put others above themselves. They grew up in that kind of atmosphere, it’s innate to them. This makes them an extremely sought after mate. If you have the chance to make a middle child a part of your life then you are lucky.

Advertising

12. They are the bridge.

What does this mean? Ask a middle child this question. She will respond as such “I am closer to my older sibling than my older sibling is to my youngest sibling” and vice versa for youngest to oldest. This means she is the family bridge. She has common ground with both siblings but provides support for all siblings to interact and communicate. Her role is essential for family structure and dynamics.

13. They know right from wrong.

A middle child has a strong grasp of their own beliefs and value system. They grew up being the mediators. They see things as cut and dry. This can help them with many difficult life decisions. They know how to look at problems with logic and facts rather than emotion and hypotheticals.

14. They know how to listen.

This world is dominated by people who know how to talk but few that know how to listen. Middle children get the meaning of being a good listener. They are empathetic and can provide insight. Again, they know how to solve problems because they know to listen first before opening their mouths. If you have a problem, consult the middle child.

15. They are competitors.

This makes sense. Middle children have grown up having to compete over everything. This only makes sense that this will transcend over to their sporting lives. Many great athletes are middle children. Given an unparalleled work ethic, the middle child knows how to win something through sheer will power.

Featured photo credit: man watching sunrise on balcony/Ed Gregory via stokpic.com

More by this author

15 Reasons Why The Middle Child Is Always Likeable 11 Incredible Things Only People Who Do Planks Every Day Understand

Trending in Communication

1 How to Let Go of Toxic People in Your Life 2 The Power of a Positive Environment on Your Everyday Life 3 9 Simple Ways to Always Stay Positive 4 How to Cope with Empty Nest Syndrome and Be Happy Again 5 How to Reinvent Yourself and Change Your Life

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on July 15, 2020

How to Let Go of Toxic People in Your Life

How to Let Go of Toxic People in Your Life

“Entitlement is an expression of conditional love. Nobody is ever entitled to your love. You always have a right to protect your mental, emotional, and physical well-being by removing yourself from toxic people and circumstances.” -Dr. Janice Anderson & Kiersten Anderson

It’s not always obvious if you have someone toxic in your life. A toxic relationship is one that is harmful to you. A toxic person can create distress to the degree you feel inadequate and isolated. So, what makes a toxic person?

A toxic person has toxic behavior, meaning it’s not that the whole person is toxic[1]. It’s what they do that counts. Most toxic people run from accountability and misrepresent reality to you. They misrepresent your worth and your ability to heal from them can be stifled the longer you keep them in your life. You have a role to play with it as well; if your values are dismissed by them and you don’t act on it, you have allowed room for toxicity to grow.

When you are in a toxic relationship, you feel less than. You feel as though you are not worth anyone’s time or effort. You feel unheard, and sometimes you feel unsafe. You don’t feel good about yourself in a toxic relationship, whether it be with a partner, friend, or family member.

You may stay in a toxic relationship for a number of reasons. You may believe yourself to be a burden, have a lack of boundaries, resist change, fear conflict, try to be a people pleaser, find yourself codependent, or are partially stuck in a pattern or unhealthy cycle of abuse.

Letting go of toxic people may not be easy. In order to do so, you have to know why or how they are toxic to you and read between the lines that they do not have your best interests in mind.

Advertising

Letting go of toxic people is hard because you are good and want to see the good in others. You think their apologies are authentic. You have trouble believing they are being dishonest. You don’t spend time healing from it. You get pulled back into the pain because you don’t want it to end. However, if you feel like something isn’t right, it probably isn’t right.

You should walk away from a toxic person because you need to preserve your peace. You need to feel like yourself again. And you need better support.

Letting go of toxic people can involve four major steps.

1. Recognize the Red Flags

Red flags are signs a person is being toxic. It’s when someone shows characteristics that you should feel caution about. It’s when you feel any level of dissatisfaction and distrust. Trust your gut. When you recognize red flags, you can evaluate whether a person is trying to manipulate you or not. This gives you some level of control over what you allow in your life. The earlier you detect these behaviors, the better off you will be.

Red flags can include:

  • They always put themselves first.
  • They point out imperfections and sabotage your self-esteem.
  • You may feel drained or used when you’re around them.
  • What you give isn’t reciprocated. They don’t return the goodness you provide as a friend.
  • They ignore your boundaries and get angry when you tell them “no.”
  • You catch them in half truths or outright lies when you confront them about anything.
  • You are the villain; they are the victim.
  • Second chances always lead to repeated patterns of behavior.
  • They may engage in abuse.

2. Set Boundaries

There are emotional boundaries that one can set, but there are also physical ones[2]. You can leave any time. Setting boundaries is also an important part of self-care.

Advertising

You shouldn’t walk on eggshells. Tell them how you feel. Are they respecting you, fulfilling your needs, and listening to you? If not, it’s time to set up a healthy emotional distance and start letting go of toxic people around you.

There are levels to this. You have your inner circle, which could include family, and then you have acquaintances and strangers. If a toxic person is in your inner circle, it’s time to pull back and put up some boundaries for them to follow. If they can’t hear you out, you can cut off the connection completely.

You can give second chances, but you have to be careful. If someone knows they can get away with something, they will do it again. If there’s any chance for the relationship, they have to know not to cross certain lines.

3. Invest in Yourself

You deserve to know you are worthwhile. Try to remember that things will get better and that anything is possible. How do you do so? Invest in yourself.

This means self care, goal setting, surrounding yourself with positive support, and feeling a sense of peace. Your greatest ambition should be to love yourself. Without self-love, letting go of toxic people will be difficult.

Every relationship is a risk, but if you know yourself and what you will allow, toxic people will have less of a hold over you. If you are a giver or people pleaser, you are most at risk to being in a one-sided relationship. You shouldn’t be punished for caring, but sometimes trust needs to be earned. If you have self-love, you are treating yourself the best way possible. You know that others need to meet your standards; otherwise, they don’t get to be a part of your life.

Advertising

It’s possible that you can love yourself and still not see the signs. It can be difficult for some to be aware that toxic people exist. However,, if you know how much you mean to others in your life and what you are worth, you will be less likely to take on a relationship that is harmful to you or repeat negative patterns. Self-love is how we get out of toxic relationships, but it’s also how they never begin.

4. Know When Forgiveness Is Possible

There are times a person will prove their worth to you. They may make a mistake that makes them seem like a horrible person. They may forget to be good to you because of their own issues. They may just have no example of what a healthy relationship looks like. They may have an inflated ego that really comes from insecurity. The list goes on.

If they apologize, that’s a start. Look at their actions. Are they changing for the better because they really want to change or just seeming to in order to manipulate you? A person may control others with their image or perceived personality, but if you see through them, you may be able to discern the degree to which they are willing to be there for you.

If they start to do the right thing, you may begin to trust them again. Don’t start forgiving them until time has passed and you are sure there is growth, even if they show vulnerability or remorse. You can give a second chance if they truly have an awakening. Otherwise, it’s best to get out. Don’t let them walk all over you; let them walk out the door.

If you do give a second change and they still refuse to change, you have every right to remove them and continue the process of letting go of toxic people. The moment you even want to leave may also be a good time to get out. You don’t have to compromise yourself in order to care for them.

Forgiveness is the release of resentment or anger[3]. Forgiveness doesn’t mean reconciliation. You have to go back to the same relationship or accept the same harmful behaviors from someone. You don’t have to let them back in. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do.

Advertising

Remember, forgiveness is ultimately for you, not them. You don’t need that person in your life in order to forgive them, and if you give them a second chance, proceed with caution.

Final Thoughts

Recognize the red flags, set boundaries, invest in yourself, and know when forgiveness is possible. This is how you cope with a toxic person impacting your life. You have power in the direction of your life and the people who accompany you as you move forward. Use it.

If a person is worthwhile, they will prove themselves through their actions, not their words. If they cross certain lines that really harm you, you owe them nothing. You have every right to feel what you feel and to be upset. Honor your feelings and communicate them because it’ll only continue to keep happening if you don’t.

If this is happening to you, it’s time to put a stop to it. It’s time to take control. It’s time to live for yourself, not for what others say about you. It’s time to set your standards higher than they’ve ever been before. And most of all, it’s time to let go.

Resource reminder: A physically abusive relationship is ALWAYS toxic. There are resources for you. Always speak up.

If you are in such a cycle or domestic violence or abuse reach out for help. For example, there is The National Domestic Violence Hotline (https://www.thehotline.org/) which can be reached at 1−800−799−7233. There are other ways to get help if you simply ask for it. 

More Tips on Letting Go of Toxic People

Featured photo credit: Hannah Busing via unsplash.com

Reference

Read Next