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14 Questions Everyone Should Be Able To Answer Before Getting Married

14 Questions Everyone Should Be Able To Answer Before Getting Married

Are you getting married, or plan to get married in the future? If yes, what are some of the questions you should ask yourself before saying “I Do?” Marriage is a life-long adventure which can be great, or not so great, so spending a great amount of time preparing yourself is a must. It could even be disastrous. You probably might have witnessed a nasty divorce before. Therefore, before you decide to tie the knot with the ONE you have been dreaming about spending the rest of your life with, ponder over the 14 questions below.

1. Are you emotionally as well as physically attracted to your partner?

Deciding to marry someone should never be solely based on their physical appearance. But because of all the beautiful people we see, and communicate with everyday, you should make sure you are physically attracted to your partner. If not, you would end up being unhappy with your spouse’s physical appearance, which could lead to other problems.

2. Are you ready to commit to spending the rest of your life with your partner?

Committing to spending the rest of your life with someone is not an easy decision. And you should make sure you are ready for this life-long commitment. Over the course of your married life, you will both grow old. You and your spouse will change in many ways. You want to be able to spend the rest of your live and grow together with this person. Being committed to each other will help you thrive as a married couple, and also become a better person.

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3. When you argue or disagree with your partner what happens?

Does it always have to be your way?  Fights, and arguments are bound to happen after you get married. You have to be able to compromise, and agree on various issues. And being able to understand it does not have to be your way all the time but OUR way will go a long way in ensuring you have a great marriage.

4. Would you be faithful, and trustworthy?

This question ties in with being ready to spend the rest of your life with the person you marry. If you cannot be faithful with your partner, do not bother about getting married. The future does not look bright for your marriage.

5. Do you share the same beliefs?

Sharing the same belief system is an integral component of most successful marriages. By sharing the same beliefs you will have another way to connect, grow, and help each other. And when your kids (if you have have kids) get older, it makes it easier to teach them what your beliefs are without having much conflict.

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6. Are you the person he/she has been looking for, and wants to marry?

If you do not the standards he/she has for a future spouse, its time to ponder about your decision again. Remember, marriage is not easy, therefore marry someone who has been looking for someone with your personality and character traits.You don’t want someone trying to change you, or vie versa.

7. Do you share similar long term, lifestyle, family, marriage, and life goals?

Imagine marrying someone who likes to travel 6 months out of the year, whereas you HATE to travel. Would you be able to live a happy, and enjoyable life together? What if you hate the cold, and he/she loves it? Do you even know what you want in life, for a career, family, etc? By marrying someone, you are agreeing to help them have a fulfilling life, and should be interested in things they like. You will certainly have some differences but let your differences compliment each other.

8. Do you both want to have kids?

If you want to have kids someday, and your partner does not want to have any kids, you both have to sit down and discuss whether moving forward with your marriage plans the best thing for both of you.

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9. If this person was incapacitated would you want to spend the rest of my life with him/her?

This question is not one we all look forward to answering. But life is unpredictable. You could be walking with both legs today, but be without your legs tomorrow from a car accident. Can you support, and be there forever with your future spouse if something like this happens?

10. Are you ready to put this persons needs above your wants?

In marriage, you both have to give and take, especially during the first few years of your marriage. You will go through some adjustments that will require putting your spouses needs above your wants. Are you ready for that? Yes, you might have to stop buying your dream car or house, just so you can put the money towards helping your spouse finish their college education. You will have to make some sacrifices.

11. Would you be a great team member?

It takes two to tango, especially in marriage. You will not be alone anymore when it comes to making decisions for your house, family, marriage, and life. If you do not work well together, or hate working together, don’t bother getting married. There will be A LOT of things you will have to both work on together everyday; not just once a week or month, marriage is all about teamwork. And if you do not make a great team member, guess what, you will not make progress in your marriage, and your life.

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12. Are you proud of your partner?

When your partner achieves an accomplishment, makes progress on a goal, or fails utterly from undertaking a goal, you should be proud of them. When he/she is around your friends and family, you should be proud to talk about them.

13. Are you ready to accept your partner’s family, and support them if need be?

You are not just marrying your partner, you are marrying his/her family too. There will be many occasions like birthdays, weddings, holidays, etc that you will have to be present, and take part in. Sometimes, you will have to contribute financially as a couple.

14. Do you want to share your finances together or have separate accounts?

Money problems is one of the well known reasons why married couples get divorced. Therefore ensure you are on the same page when it comes to your finances. What if after going through these questions, get married, and your marriage ends in a divorce? Life is unpredictable, therefore use these questions as a guide when deciding to get married.

These questions will help you make a good decision, and not rush into getting married. After getting, married, you and your spouse must continually work hard to improve yourself and live the marriage you both dreamed about before saying “I Do.” If you are not ready to commit, be selfless, learn, and work hard to make your marriage a healthy, happy, and lasting one, marriage might not be for you!

Featured photo credit: niekverlaan via pixabay.com

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Last Updated on July 27, 2020

7 Ways to Make Life Changing Decisions

7 Ways to Make Life Changing Decisions

Most people don’t know the profound effects of making life decisions. Often times, we go through life oblivious to what thoughts we are thinking and what actions we are taking. Every single decision we make in our days shapes our current reality. It shapes who we are as a person because we habitually follow through with the decisions we make without even realizing it.

If you’re unhappy with the results in your life right now, making the effort to changing your decisions starting today will be the key to creating the person you want to be and the life you want to have in the future.

Let’s talk about the 7 ways you can go about making life changing decisions.

1. Realize the Power of Decision Making

Before you start making a decision, you have to understand what a decision does.

Any decision that you make causes a chain of events to happen. When you decide to pick up a cigarette to smoke it, that decision might result in you picking up another one later on to get that same high feeling. After a day, you may have gone through a pack without knowing it. But if you decide not to smoke that first cigarette and make a decision every five minutes to focus your attention somewhere else when you get that craving, after doing this for a week, your cravings will eventually subside and you will become smoke-free.

But it comes down to making that very first decision of deciding whether or not to pick up that cigarette.

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2. Go with Your Gut

Often times, we take too much time to make a decision because we’re afraid of what’s going to happen. As a result of this, we go through things like careful planning, deep analysis, and pros and cons before deciding. This is a very time consuming process.

Instead, learn to trust your gut instinct. For the most part, your first instinct is usually the one that is correct or the one that you truly wanted to go with.

Even if you end up making a mistake, going with your gut still makes you a more confident decision maker compared to someone who takes all day to decide.

3. Carry Your Decision Out

When you make a decision, act on it. Commit to making a real decision.

What’s a real decision? It’s when you decide on something, and that decision is carried out through action. It’s pointless to make a decision and have it played out in your head, but not doing anything about it. That’s the same as not making a decision at all.

If you want to make real changes in life, you have to make it a habit to apply action with your decision until it’s completed. By going through this so many times, you will feel more confident with accomplishing the next decision that you have in mind.

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4. Tell Others About Your Decisions

There’s something about telling other people what we’re going to do that makes us follow through.

For example, for the longest time, I’ve been trying to become an early riser. Whenever I tried to use my own willpower, waking up early without falling back asleep felt impossible. So what I did was I went to a forum and made the decision to tell people that I would wake up at 6 AM and stay up. Within two days, I was able to accomplish doing this because I felt a moral obligation to follow through with my words even though I failed the first time.

Did people care? Probably not, but just the fact that there might be someone else out there seeing if you’re telling the truth will give you enough motivation to following through with your decision.

5. Learn from Your Past Decisions

Even after I failed to follow through my decision the first time when I told people I was going to wake up early and stay up, I didn’t give up. I basically asked myself, “What can I do this time to make it work tomorrow?”

The truth is, you are going to mess up at times when it comes to making decisions. Instead of beating yourself up over it, learn something from it.

Ask yourself, what was good about the decision I made? What was bad about it? What can I learn from it so I can make a better decision next time?

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Remember, don’t put so much emphasis focusing on short term effects; instead focus on the long term effects.

6. Maintain a Flexible Approach

I know this might sound counter-intuitive, but making a decision doesn’t mean that you can’t be open to other options.

For example, let’s say you made the decision to lose ten pounds by next month through cardio. If something comes up, you don’t have to just do cardio. You can be open to losing weight through different methods of dieting as long as it helps you reach your goal in the end.

Don’t be stubborn to seek out only one way of making a decision. Embrace any new knowledge that brings you closer to accomplishing your initial decision.

7. Have Fun Making Decisions

Finally, enjoy the process. I know decision-making might not be the most fun thing world to do, but when you do it often, it becomes a game of opportunity.

You’ll learn a lot about yourself on the way, you’ll feel and become a lot more confident when you’re with yourself and around others, and making decisions will just become a lot easier after you do it so often that you won’t even think about it.

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Anything you decide to do from this point on can have a profound effect later on. Opportunities are always waiting for you. Examine the decisions that you currently have in the day.

Are there any that can be changed to improve your life in some way? Are there any decisions that you can make today that can create a better tomorrow?

Final Thoughts

Some decisions in life are harder to make, but with these 7 pieces of advice, you can trust yourself more even when you’re making some of the most important decisions.

Making a decision is the only way to move forward. So remember, any decision is better than none at all.

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Featured photo credit: Justin Luebke via unsplash.com

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