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14 Questions Everyone Should Be Able To Answer Before Getting Married

14 Questions Everyone Should Be Able To Answer Before Getting Married

Are you getting married, or plan to get married in the future? If yes, what are some of the questions you should ask yourself before saying “I Do?” Marriage is a life-long adventure which can be great, or not so great, so spending a great amount of time preparing yourself is a must. It could even be disastrous. You probably might have witnessed a nasty divorce before. Therefore, before you decide to tie the knot with the ONE you have been dreaming about spending the rest of your life with, ponder over the 14 questions below.

1. Are you emotionally as well as physically attracted to your partner?

Deciding to marry someone should never be solely based on their physical appearance. But because of all the beautiful people we see, and communicate with everyday, you should make sure you are physically attracted to your partner. If not, you would end up being unhappy with your spouse’s physical appearance, which could lead to other problems.

2. Are you ready to commit to spending the rest of your life with your partner?

Committing to spending the rest of your life with someone is not an easy decision. And you should make sure you are ready for this life-long commitment. Over the course of your married life, you will both grow old. You and your spouse will change in many ways. You want to be able to spend the rest of your live and grow together with this person. Being committed to each other will help you thrive as a married couple, and also become a better person.

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3. When you argue or disagree with your partner what happens?

Does it always have to be your way?  Fights, and arguments are bound to happen after you get married. You have to be able to compromise, and agree on various issues. And being able to understand it does not have to be your way all the time but OUR way will go a long way in ensuring you have a great marriage.

4. Would you be faithful, and trustworthy?

This question ties in with being ready to spend the rest of your life with the person you marry. If you cannot be faithful with your partner, do not bother about getting married. The future does not look bright for your marriage.

5. Do you share the same beliefs?

Sharing the same belief system is an integral component of most successful marriages. By sharing the same beliefs you will have another way to connect, grow, and help each other. And when your kids (if you have have kids) get older, it makes it easier to teach them what your beliefs are without having much conflict.

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6. Are you the person he/she has been looking for, and wants to marry?

If you do not the standards he/she has for a future spouse, its time to ponder about your decision again. Remember, marriage is not easy, therefore marry someone who has been looking for someone with your personality and character traits.You don’t want someone trying to change you, or vie versa.

7. Do you share similar long term, lifestyle, family, marriage, and life goals?

Imagine marrying someone who likes to travel 6 months out of the year, whereas you HATE to travel. Would you be able to live a happy, and enjoyable life together? What if you hate the cold, and he/she loves it? Do you even know what you want in life, for a career, family, etc? By marrying someone, you are agreeing to help them have a fulfilling life, and should be interested in things they like. You will certainly have some differences but let your differences compliment each other.

8. Do you both want to have kids?

If you want to have kids someday, and your partner does not want to have any kids, you both have to sit down and discuss whether moving forward with your marriage plans the best thing for both of you.

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9. If this person was incapacitated would you want to spend the rest of my life with him/her?

This question is not one we all look forward to answering. But life is unpredictable. You could be walking with both legs today, but be without your legs tomorrow from a car accident. Can you support, and be there forever with your future spouse if something like this happens?

10. Are you ready to put this persons needs above your wants?

In marriage, you both have to give and take, especially during the first few years of your marriage. You will go through some adjustments that will require putting your spouses needs above your wants. Are you ready for that? Yes, you might have to stop buying your dream car or house, just so you can put the money towards helping your spouse finish their college education. You will have to make some sacrifices.

11. Would you be a great team member?

It takes two to tango, especially in marriage. You will not be alone anymore when it comes to making decisions for your house, family, marriage, and life. If you do not work well together, or hate working together, don’t bother getting married. There will be A LOT of things you will have to both work on together everyday; not just once a week or month, marriage is all about teamwork. And if you do not make a great team member, guess what, you will not make progress in your marriage, and your life.

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12. Are you proud of your partner?

When your partner achieves an accomplishment, makes progress on a goal, or fails utterly from undertaking a goal, you should be proud of them. When he/she is around your friends and family, you should be proud to talk about them.

13. Are you ready to accept your partner’s family, and support them if need be?

You are not just marrying your partner, you are marrying his/her family too. There will be many occasions like birthdays, weddings, holidays, etc that you will have to be present, and take part in. Sometimes, you will have to contribute financially as a couple.

14. Do you want to share your finances together or have separate accounts?

Money problems is one of the well known reasons why married couples get divorced. Therefore ensure you are on the same page when it comes to your finances. What if after going through these questions, get married, and your marriage ends in a divorce? Life is unpredictable, therefore use these questions as a guide when deciding to get married.

These questions will help you make a good decision, and not rush into getting married. After getting, married, you and your spouse must continually work hard to improve yourself and live the marriage you both dreamed about before saying “I Do.” If you are not ready to commit, be selfless, learn, and work hard to make your marriage a healthy, happy, and lasting one, marriage might not be for you!

Featured photo credit: niekverlaan via pixabay.com

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Last Updated on September 12, 2019

12 Things You Should Remember When Feeling Lost in Life

12 Things You Should Remember When Feeling Lost in Life

Even the most charismatic people you know, whether in person or celebrities of some sort, experience days where they feel lost in life and isolated from everyone else.

While it’s good to know we aren’t alone in this feeling, the question still remains:

What should we do when we feel lost and lonely?

Here are 12 things to remember:

1. Recognize That It’s Okay!

The truth is, there are times you need to be alone. If you’ve always been accustomed to being in contact with people, this may prove difficult.

However, learning how to be alone and comfortable in your own skin will give you confidence and a sense of self reliance.

We cheat ourselves out of the opportunity to become self reliant when we look for constant companionship.

Learn how to embrace your me time: What Your Fear of Being Alone Is Really About and How to Get over It

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2. Use Your Lost and Loneliness as a Self-Directing Guide

You’ve most likely heard the expression: “You have to know where you’ve been to know where you’re going.”

Loneliness also serves as a life signal to indicate you’re in search of something. It’s when we’re in the midst of solitude that answers come from true soul searching.

Remember, there is more to life than what you’re feeling.

3. Realize Loneliness Helps You Face the Truth

Being in the constant company of others, although comforting sometimes, can often serve as a distraction when we need to face the reality of a situation.

Solitude cuts straight to the chase and forces you to deal with the problem at hand. See it as a blessing that can serve as a catalyst to set things right!

4. Be Aware That You Have More Control Than You Think

Typically, when we see ourselves as being lost or lonely, it gives us an excuse to view everything we come in contact with in a negative light. It lends itself to putting ourselves in the victim mode, when the truth of the matter is that you choose your attitude in every situation.

No one can force a feeling upon you! It is YOU who has the ultimate say as to how you choose to react.

5. Embrace the Freedom That the Feeling of Being Alone Can Offer

Instead of wallowing in self pity, which many are prone to do because of loneliness, try looking at your circumstance as a new-found freedom.

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Most people are in constant need of approval of their viewpoints. Try enjoying the fact that  you don’t need everyone you care about to support your decisions.

6. Acknowledge the Person You Are Now

Perhaps you feel a sense of loneliness and confusion because your life circumstances have taken you away from the persona that others know to be you.

Perhaps the new you differs radically from the old. Realize that life is about change and how we react to that change. It’s okay that you’re not who you used to be.

Take a look at this article and learn to accept your imperfect self: Accept Yourself (Flaws and All): 7 Benefits of Being Vulnerable

7. Keep Striving to Do Your Best

Often those who are feeling isolated and unto themselves will develop a defeatist attitude. They’ll do substandard work because their self esteem is low and they don’t care.

Never let this feeling take away your sense of worth! Do your best always and when you come through this dark time, others will admire how you stayed determined in spite of the obstacles you had to overcome.

And to live your best life, you must do this ONE thing: step out of your comfort zone.

8. Don’t Forget That Time Is Precious

When we’re lost in a sea of loneliness and depression, it’s all too easy to reflect on regrets of past life events. This does nothing but feed negativity and perpetuate the situation.

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Instead of falling prey to this common pitfall, put one foot in front of the other and acknowledge every positive step you take. By doing this, you can celebrate the struggles you overcome at the end of the day.

9. Remember, Things Happen for a Reason

Every circumstance we encounter in our life is designed to teach us and that lesson is in turn passed on to others.

Sometimes we’re fortunate enough to figure out the lesson to be learned, while other times, we simply need to have faith that if the lesson wasn’t meant directly for us to learn from, how we handled it was observed by someone who needed to learn.

Your solitude and feeling of lost, in this instance, although painful possibly, may be teaching someone else.

10. Journal During This Time

Record your thoughts when you’re at the height of loneliness and feeling lost. You’ll be amazed when you reflect back at how you viewed things at the time and how far you’ve come later.

This time (if recorded) can give you a keen insight into who you are and what makes you feel the way you feel.

11. Remember You Aren’t the First to Feel This Way

It’s quite common to feel as if we’re alone and no one else has ever felt this way before. We think this because at the time of our distress, we’re silently observing others around us who are seemingly fine in every way.

The truth is, we can’t possibly know the struggles of those around us unless they elect to share them. We ALL have known this pain!

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Try confiding in someone you trust and ask them how they deal with these feelings when they experienced it. You may be surprised at what you learn.

12. Ask for Help If the Problem Persists

The feeling of being lost and lonely is common to everyone, but typically it will last for a relatively short period of time.

Most people will confess to, at one time or another, being in a “funk.” But if the problem persists longer than you feel it should, don’t ignore it.

When your ability to reason and consider things rationally becomes impaired, do not poo poo the problem away and think it isn’t worthy of attention. Seek medical help.

Afraid to ask for help? Here’s how to change your outlook to aim high!

Final Thoughts

Loneliness and a sense of feeling lost can in many ways be extremely painful and difficult to deal with at best. However, these feelings can also serve as a catalyst for change in our lives if we acknowledge them and act.

Above anything, cherish your mental well being and don’t underestimate its worth. Seek professional guidance if you’re unable to distinguish between a sense of freedom for yourself and a sense of despair.

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Featured photo credit: Andrew Neel via unsplash.com

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