Advertising
Advertising

Not A Confident Person? You Will Know How To Be One After Reading This.

Not A Confident Person? You Will Know How To Be One After Reading This.

Based on the movie poster, I’m not thinking I’ll like Fight Club 2…
The key to success (whether in a relationship, job, or personal endeavor) is confidence. It’s been scientifically proven that people are attracted to tenacity, and the way you’re perceived can change based on your level of personal mettle. If you want to improve every aspect of your life, boost your confidence with these easy steps.

1 – Cleanliness Is Close to Confidence

When you wake up, cleaning yourself up should be among your first priorities. A routine of heading to the bathroom to wash up starts your day off right; you’re the star of your own personal movie, and a trip to the green room will make you feel like a million bucks inside, no matter what your bank account says. Keeping clean will also make you less self-conscious around other people, as your thoughts won’t be lingering on whether or not your breath smells, or there’s an odor coming from your armpits, feet, etc.

2 – Mirror, Mirror, on the Wall

While you’re cleaning up in the bathroom, it’s difficult not to look in the mirror, as they’re usually equipped. Look yourself in the eyes and see what it is that other people see when they look at you. Practice saying and doing things in the mirror to understand how you’re coming off to the outside world. Also give yourself a pep talk. You’ll see in the mirror the way someone reacts when they truly care about you, so you’ll have a bar to measure people with.

3 – Think about It

Advertising

Where did I put that damn HDMI cable?

    Where did I put that damn HDMI cable?

    We are our own God; regardless of who or where you are, you’re responsible for the way you interact with the world. If you want to be confident, you have to think confident. This means not doubting yourself–instead, coach and motivate yourself. The power of positive and negative thinking can transform you, and, since you’re you, it’s in your best interests to have a positive mindset about yourself.

    4 – Dress to Impress

    Everyone judges everyone. When you see someone dressed up, you naturally treat them with more respect than you would someone sloppy–it’s like how you drive a little better when there’s a cop driving behind you (unless you’re rich or daddy’s a politician), and you don’t mouth off to a soldier (unless you’re a hippie or insurgent). Here’s a tip: store security dresses up in pressed black clothes to look like cops and deter you from theft for a fraction the cost of real bacon (and with less cholesterol).

    5 – Be Prepared

    Athletes watch hours of footage every day to study themselves and their opponents. Artists paint thousands of pictures, play thousands of songs, and dance thousands of dances before their work registers in your senses. People may be born with certain strengths and weaknesses, but preparation for the events in your life makes a world of difference in improving how confident you are.

    Advertising

    6 – Improve Your Posture

    Dear Santa, In what universe is a piano a drum set?

      Dear Santa, In what universe is a piano a drum set?

      Don’t slouch! When you’re hunched over, you look smaller. Have you ever seen a nature video? In the animal kingdom, a common survival method is to bulk up (or at least make yourself appear larger). This works on people too. You don’t see the President or a CEO hunched over looking at their feet, so why are you?

      7 – Move with a Purpose

      The way you walk goes a long way in affecting how you’re perceived. The WWE is a great place to see this in the wild. Though not allowed to compete in the Olympics, professional wrestlers have a style about them. Each individual wrestler is defined by their entrance, their strut, and their attitude well before they earn that undisputed championship belt. It doesn’t matter whether you win or lose; it’s how you strut that counts. Just don’t get all Spider-Man 3 about it.

      Advertising

      8 – Look People in the Eye

      This dog...was owned by Rapper, Ice T...here's the proof...

        This dog was owned by Rapper, Ice T…here’s the proof

        Feeling confident means having power over your surroundings; it means people around you are treating you the way you want. Looking someone in the eye is a great way to show people you’re confident. This will build trust, and you’ll be more attuned them, picking up their visual cues. If you learn to read these cues, you’ll be able to convince yourself you can control the world around you with the power of your own voice.

        9 – Stick to Your Guns

        Remember all those positive things you said to yourself in the mirror? Continue saying them throughout the day. You have to reinforce your confidence; it’s not something you decide to be, and it magically happens. Sticking to your guns also means standing up for what you believe in. Doing so will give you the confidence to say what you mean and mean what you say, no matter what anyone thinks of you.

        Advertising

        10 – Learn and Burn

        Study and exercise are the best ways to boost your confidence. There’s a certain power you get knowing you’re the smartest person in the room. Knowing that you’re able to defend yourself is powerful as well. Your energy levels will be higher, you’ll be more alert, and you’ll be a constantly-evolving person. I’m confident there are no downsides to studying and exercising.

        11 – Baby Steps to Success

        Above all else, know that it takes baby steps to get anywhere in life. Overnight success doesn’t exist; it’s a myth, just like Zeus, unicorns, and a decent movie with the word “vs.” in the title. Don’t get frustrated if things don’t go as planned, and don’t give up–continue planning, acting, doing, and gaining the confidence to succeed.

        More by this author

        7 Ways To Make Exercise Fun For Everyone Say Goodbye to a Skinny Body: How to Gain Weight Fast 24 Easy Ways To Make Money On The Internet What 500 Calories Really Looks Like in Different Foods 20 Awesome Screensavers that Make your Desktop Delightful

        Trending in Communication

        1 When Should You Trust Your Gut and How? 2 What Is Life About? 9 Ways to Find Your Meaning in Life 3 7 Things To Remember When You Feel Broken Inside 4 Focus On Yourself, Because Most Of The Time No One Really Cares 5 10 Principles for Success to Live Your Dream Life

        Read Next

        Advertising
        Advertising
        Advertising

        Last Updated on August 12, 2020

        When Should You Trust Your Gut and How?

        When Should You Trust Your Gut and How?

        Learning how to trust your gut, otherwise known as your intuition, can keep you safe. Your gut can guide you and help you build your confidence and resilience. My own gut instinct has saved me on more than one occasion. It has also guided me into making sound career choices and other exciting, big decisions. I’m also aware of the times when I’ve gone against my instincts and really regretted it later, wondering why I didn’t tune in to that valuable internal voice that we all have within us.

        In this article, we’re going to explore why and how you should listen to your gut, as well as some concrete tips on how to make sure you’re making the most out of your gut instincts.

        How to Listen to Your Gut

        The key when making any big decision is to always take a minute to listen well to yourself and your inner compass. If you hear your actual voice saying yes while inside you’re silently screaming no, my advice is to ask for some time to think, or simply take a breath and pause before the yes or no escapes your mouth.

        Use that moment to breathe, check in with yourself, and give the answer that feels congruent with who you are and what you want, not the one that always involves following the herd. Trusting your gut means having the courage to not simply go with the majority. It can be about holding your own. Here’s how to hone that skill for yourself and reap the rewards.

        1. Tune Into Your Body

        Your body gives you clues when you’re faced with a big decision. There are many visible and obvious symptoms that we feel in uncomfortable situations. Our body’s reaction is often something that we might try to hide, for example, blushing, being lost for words, or shaking. There are things we might do to try and hide that physical reaction, whether it’s wearing makeup, having a glass of wine or coffee to perk us up a bit, or learning to control our nerves.

        However, paying attention to your body when you experience these feelings of anxiety can teach you so much and help you to make sound choices. Some people will experience an actual “gut” feeling of stomach ache or indigestion in an uncomfortable situation.

        Ask yourself what’s really going on here, and explore what is happening behind your body’s response to the situation. What can your reaction or instinct teach you? Understanding that can be a clue and can help you either learn something about yourself, the situation, or other people. The answers are often within us.

        Advertising

        Sometimes we’ll get this “something’s not right here” feeling and cannot quite put our finger on it or explain it. That can still be incredibly useful and really guide us away from danger, even if we don’t know the reason.

        In his book, Blink, Malcolm Gladwell also argues this, making the point that sometimes our subconscious is better at processing the answer we need, and that we don’t necessarily need to take time to collect hours and hours of information to come to a reliable conclusion[1].

        2. Ensure Your Head Is Clear Before Making a Decision

        Energy, sleep, and good nutrition are so vital to nourishing our minds, as well as our bodies. There are times when your instinct could lead you astray, and one of these is when you are hungry, “hangry” (angry because you’re hungry!), tired, or anxious. If this is the case–and it may sound obvious–do consider sleeping or eating on it before making an important choice.

        There is, in fact, a connection between our gut and our brain[2], which is where terms like “butterflies in the stomach” and “gut-wrenching” originate from. Stress and emotions can cause physical feelings, and ignoring them might do more harm than good.

        3. Don’t Be Afraid to Say What You Think and Feel

        Listening to your gut and really paying attention to it might involve standing up and being counted, calling something out, or taking a stand. As someone who works for myself, I’ve become used to following the less-travelled road, and that’s given me the chance to strike out on my own in other ways, too.

        As they tell you in the planes, “put your own oxygen mask on first,” and part of that self-reliance is knowing what you really want and like and what is safe and good for you, including what resonates with your personal and business values. Making good decisions with this in mind means making choices that do not go against your own beliefs, even when it may mean taking a stand. This is part of trusting yourself and trusting your instincts.

        This does not always mean taking the “safe” option, although keeping ourselves safe is an important part of the process. This is how we learn and grow, by following our own inner compass. When you do take risks, go outside of your comfort zone, or choose the less popular option, spending some time researching the facts can stand us in good stead, too.

        Advertising

        4. Do Your Research If Something Feels Off

        As well as listening to our instincts, we can also back up the evidence for our chosen course of action before taking the leap. I had a gut feeling about the need for a learning and development network when I noticed my clients getting stuck with the same problems. I set up and now run such a network, but instead of simply going for it, without evidence, I followed up on my instinct with research.

        Having confidence in your gut instinct through these kinds of tests can help to minimize your risks, as well as spur you on. It will encourage you to trust your gut again in the future and trust that you are an expert with foresight and experience. You are!

        5. Challenge Your Assumptions

        When you look at the assumptions your making, this could be the clue to mistakes you are making.

        In order to check that our instincts are wise, we need to ask ourselves what blanks we might be filling in, either consciously or unconsciously. This is true not just when it comes to our own decision-making. It’s also true when we are listening to someone explain a problem or situation, and we’re about to jump in and give some advice. If we can learn to be aware of our own assumptions, we can become better listeners and better decision makers, too.

        A useful tool to become more aware of your assumptions before making a final decision is simply to ask yourself, “What assumptions am I making about this situation or person?”

        6. Educate Yourself on Unconscious Bias

        Unconscious bias is something we all have, and it can trip us up big time!

        There is a vital caveat to bear in mind when wondering about whether you can trust your gut and the feelings your body gives you, and that’s having an awareness of your unconscious bias. Understanding your own bias–which is hard to do because it literally does happen in our subconscious–can help you to make stronger, better, decisions instead of re-confirming your view of the world over and over again.

        Advertising

        Bias exists, and it’s part of the human condition. All of us have it, and it colors our decisions and can impact on our performance without us realizing.

        Unconscious bias happens at a subconscious level in our brains. Our subconscious brain processes information so much faster than our conscious brain. Quick decisions we make in our subconscious are based on both our societal conditioning and how our families raised us.

        Our brains process hundreds of thousands of pieces of information daily. We unconsciously categorize and format that information into patterns that feel familiar to us. Aspects such as gender, disability, class, sexuality, body shape and size, ethnicity, and what someone does for a job can all quickly influence decisions we make about people and the relationships we choose to form. Our unconscious bias can be very subtle and go unnoticed..

        We naturally tend to gravitate towards people similar to ourselves, favoring people who we see as belonging to the same “group” as us. Being able to make a quick decision about whether someone is part of your group and distinguish friend from foe was what helped early humans to survive. Conversely, we don’t automatically favor people who we don’t immediately relate to or easily connect with.

        The downside of that human instinct to seek out similar people is the potential for prejudice, which seems to be hard-wired into human cognition, no matter how open-minded we believe ourselves to be. And these stereotypes we create can be wrong. If we only spend our time with and employ people similar to ourselves, it can create prejudices, as well as stifle fresh thinking and innovation.

        We may feel more natural or comfortable working with other people who share our own background and/or opinions than collaborating with people who don’t look, talk, or think like us. However, diversity is not just morally right; having a mix of different people and perspectives that can be genuinely heard is also a valuable way to counter groupthink. Diversity stretches us to think more critically and creatively.

        7. Trust Yourself

        It is possible to learn how to truly trust yourself[3]. Like any talent or skill, practicing trusting your gut is the best way to get really good at it. When people talk about having great intuition or being good decision-makers, it’s because they’ve worked at honing those skills, made mistakes, learned from them, and tried again.

        Advertising

        Looking back at decisions you’ve made, what you did, what the outcome was, and what you’ve learned can help you become a stronger decision maker and develop solid self-trust and resilience. Making a mistake does not mean you are not great at decision-making; it’s a chance to grow and learn, and the only mistake is to ignore the lesson in that experience.

        If you are in the habit of asking others for their input, then the trick here is to choose your inner circle wisely. Having a sounding board of people who have your best interests at heart is a valuable asset, and, combined with your own excellent instincts, can make you a champion decision maker.

        The Bottom Line

        The above tips are all actionable and easy to start immediately. It’s simply about switching your thinking around, slowing down, and taking great care of this amazing machine that is your body and mind!

        Learning how to trust your gut is one of the most fundamental ways to make decisions that will help you lead the life you want and need. Tune into what your body is telling you and start making good decisions today.

        More Tips on How to Trust Your Gut

        Featured photo credit: Acy Varlan via unsplash.com

        Reference

        [1] Science of People: Learn to Trust Your Gut Instincts: The Science Behind Thin-slicing
        [2] Harvard Health Publishing: The gut-brain connection
        [3] Psych Central: 3 Ways to Develop Self-Trust

        Read Next