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Not A Confident Person? You Will Know How To Be One After Reading This.

Not A Confident Person? You Will Know How To Be One After Reading This.

Based on the movie poster, I’m not thinking I’ll like Fight Club 2…
The key to success (whether in a relationship, job, or personal endeavor) is confidence. It’s been scientifically proven that people are attracted to tenacity, and the way you’re perceived can change based on your level of personal mettle. If you want to improve every aspect of your life, boost your confidence with these easy steps.

1 – Cleanliness Is Close to Confidence

When you wake up, cleaning yourself up should be among your first priorities. A routine of heading to the bathroom to wash up starts your day off right; you’re the star of your own personal movie, and a trip to the green room will make you feel like a million bucks inside, no matter what your bank account says. Keeping clean will also make you less self-conscious around other people, as your thoughts won’t be lingering on whether or not your breath smells, or there’s an odor coming from your armpits, feet, etc.

2 – Mirror, Mirror, on the Wall

While you’re cleaning up in the bathroom, it’s difficult not to look in the mirror, as they’re usually equipped. Look yourself in the eyes and see what it is that other people see when they look at you. Practice saying and doing things in the mirror to understand how you’re coming off to the outside world. Also give yourself a pep talk. You’ll see in the mirror the way someone reacts when they truly care about you, so you’ll have a bar to measure people with.

3 – Think about It

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Where did I put that damn HDMI cable?

    Where did I put that damn HDMI cable?

    We are our own God; regardless of who or where you are, you’re responsible for the way you interact with the world. If you want to be confident, you have to think confident. This means not doubting yourself–instead, coach and motivate yourself. The power of positive and negative thinking can transform you, and, since you’re you, it’s in your best interests to have a positive mindset about yourself.

    4 – Dress to Impress

    Everyone judges everyone. When you see someone dressed up, you naturally treat them with more respect than you would someone sloppy–it’s like how you drive a little better when there’s a cop driving behind you (unless you’re rich or daddy’s a politician), and you don’t mouth off to a soldier (unless you’re a hippie or insurgent). Here’s a tip: store security dresses up in pressed black clothes to look like cops and deter you from theft for a fraction the cost of real bacon (and with less cholesterol).

    5 – Be Prepared

    Athletes watch hours of footage every day to study themselves and their opponents. Artists paint thousands of pictures, play thousands of songs, and dance thousands of dances before their work registers in your senses. People may be born with certain strengths and weaknesses, but preparation for the events in your life makes a world of difference in improving how confident you are.

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    6 – Improve Your Posture

    Dear Santa, In what universe is a piano a drum set?

      Dear Santa, In what universe is a piano a drum set?

      Don’t slouch! When you’re hunched over, you look smaller. Have you ever seen a nature video? In the animal kingdom, a common survival method is to bulk up (or at least make yourself appear larger). This works on people too. You don’t see the President or a CEO hunched over looking at their feet, so why are you?

      7 – Move with a Purpose

      The way you walk goes a long way in affecting how you’re perceived. The WWE is a great place to see this in the wild. Though not allowed to compete in the Olympics, professional wrestlers have a style about them. Each individual wrestler is defined by their entrance, their strut, and their attitude well before they earn that undisputed championship belt. It doesn’t matter whether you win or lose; it’s how you strut that counts. Just don’t get all Spider-Man 3 about it.

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      8 – Look People in the Eye

      This dog...was owned by Rapper, Ice T...here's the proof...

        This dog was owned by Rapper, Ice T…here’s the proof

        Feeling confident means having power over your surroundings; it means people around you are treating you the way you want. Looking someone in the eye is a great way to show people you’re confident. This will build trust, and you’ll be more attuned them, picking up their visual cues. If you learn to read these cues, you’ll be able to convince yourself you can control the world around you with the power of your own voice.

        9 – Stick to Your Guns

        Remember all those positive things you said to yourself in the mirror? Continue saying them throughout the day. You have to reinforce your confidence; it’s not something you decide to be, and it magically happens. Sticking to your guns also means standing up for what you believe in. Doing so will give you the confidence to say what you mean and mean what you say, no matter what anyone thinks of you.

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        10 – Learn and Burn

        Study and exercise are the best ways to boost your confidence. There’s a certain power you get knowing you’re the smartest person in the room. Knowing that you’re able to defend yourself is powerful as well. Your energy levels will be higher, you’ll be more alert, and you’ll be a constantly-evolving person. I’m confident there are no downsides to studying and exercising.

        11 – Baby Steps to Success

        Above all else, know that it takes baby steps to get anywhere in life. Overnight success doesn’t exist; it’s a myth, just like Zeus, unicorns, and a decent movie with the word “vs.” in the title. Don’t get frustrated if things don’t go as planned, and don’t give up–continue planning, acting, doing, and gaining the confidence to succeed.

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        Last Updated on April 19, 2021

        How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

        How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

        We all lose our temper from time to time, and expressing anger is actually a healthy thing to do in our relationships with others. Expressing our differences in opinion allows us to have healthy conflict and many times come to an agreement or understanding that works for everyone. However, there are times when anger can become overwhelming or damaging, and during these times, it’s important to learn how to deal with anger.

        Expressing anger inappropriately can be harmful to relationships, both personal and professional. You may express too much anger, too often, or at times that are only going to make things worse, not better. In this article we will look at anger management techniques that will help you better control your emotions.

        Let’s take a deeper look at how to deal with anger.

        Expressing Anger

        Anger is a natural and normal part of almost any relationship. This includes relationships with your significant other, kids, boss, friends, family, etc. Anger provides us with valuable information if we are willing to listen to it. It clues us in to areas where we disagree with others and things that need to be changed or altered.

        Unhealthy Ways to Express Anger

        Here are some common yet unhealthy ways to express anger that you should avoid:

        Being Passive-Aggressive

        This is a term many of us are familiar with. Passive-aggressive behavior happens when someone is angry but uses indirect communication to express their anger.

        Some of the more common passive-aggressive behaviors include the silent treatment, making comments about someone behind their back, being grumpy, moody, or pouting, or simply not doing tasks or assignments that they should.

        This is a passive-aggressive person’s way of showing their anger. It’s not very productive but extremely common.

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        Poorly-Timed

        Some people get overwhelmed and express anger in a situation where it can’t really do any good.

        An example would be getting angry at one person in front of a crowd of people. All that does is make people uncomfortable and shuts them down. It’s not a healthy way to express anger or disagreement with someone.

        Ongoing Anger

        Being angry all the time is most often a symptom of something else. It’s healthy and normal to express anger when you disagree with someone. However, if someone is angry most of the time and always seems to be expressing their anger to everyone around them, this won’t serve them well.

        Over time, people will start to avoid this person and have as little contact as possible. The reason being is no one likes being around someone who is angry all the time; it’s a no-win situation.

        Healthy Ways to Express Anger

        What about the healthy ways[1] to adapt? When learning how to deal with anger, here are some healthy ways to get you started.

        Being Honest

        Express your anger or disagreement honestly. Be truthful about what it is that is making you angry. Sometimes this will entail walking away and thinking about it for a bit before you respond.

        Don’t say you’re mad at something someone did or said when it’s really something else that upset you.

        Being Direct

        Similar to being honest, being direct is a healthy way to express anger.

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        Don’t talk around something that is making you angry. Don’t say that one thing is making you angry when it’s really something else, and don’t stack items on top of each other so you can unload on someone about 10 different things 6 months from now.

        Be direct and upfront about what is making you angry. Ensure you are expressing your anger to the person who upset you or you are angry at, not to someone else. This is very counterproductive.

        Being Timely

        When something makes you angry, it’s much better to express it in a timely manner. Don’t keep it bottled up inside of you, as that’s only going to do more harm than good.

        Think of the marriages that seem to go up in flames out of nowhere when the reality is someone kept quiet for years until they hit their breaking point.

        Expressing anger as it occurs is a much healthier way of using anger to help us guide our relationships in the moment.

        How to Deal With Anger

        If you feel angry, how should you deal with it right at that moment?

        1. Slow Down

        From time to time, I receive an email at work that makes me so angry that steam is probably pouring out of my ears.

        In my less restrained moments, I have been known to fire off a quick response, and that typically has ended about as well as you might imagine.

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        When I actually walk away from my computer and go do something else for a while, I am able to calm down and think more rationally. After that happens, I am able to respond in a more appropriate and productive manner. Doing things that helps you learn how to release anger can make an uncomfortable situation more manageable before it gets out of hand.

        2. Focus on the “I”

        Remember that you are the one that’s upset. Don’t accuse people of making you upset because, in the end, it’s your response to what someone did that really triggered your anger. You don’t want to place blame by saying something like “Why don’t you ever put away your dishes?” Say something more like “Having dirty dishes laying on the counter upsets me—can you work with me to come to a solution?”

        When you are accusatory towards someone, all that does is increase the tension. This doesn’t usually do anything except make your anger rise higher.

        3. Work out

        When learning how to deal with anger, exercise is a great outlet. If something happens that angers you, see if you have the opportunity to burn off some of the anger.

        Being able to hit the gym to get a hard workout in is great. If this isn’t an option, see if you can go for a run or a bike ride. If you are at work when you become angry and the weather permits, at least go outside for a brisk walk.

        Besides working some of your anger out through exercise, this also helps to give your mind a chance to work through some ways to address what it is that upset you.

        If you’re not sure where to start with an exercise routine, check out Lifehack’s free Simple Cardio Home Workout Plan.

        4. Seek Help When Needed

        There are times when we could all use some help. Life can be stressful and overwhelming. It’s perfectly fine to seek some help from a mental health professional if it will help you get back to a healthy balance.If you find that you are angry all the time, it might be a good idea to go talk to an expert about learning to control intense emotions. They can give you some sound advice and ideas on how to get your anger to a more manageable and healthy level.

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        5. Practice Relaxation

        We all seem to lead incredibly busy lives, and that’s a good thing if we are loving the life we are living. That being said, it is very beneficial to our physical and mental well-being to take time out for relaxation.

        That can mean spending time doing things that help us calm down and relax, like being around people we enjoy, practicing deep breathing or listening to music. It could be making time for things that help bring us balance like a healthy diet and physical activity.

        Many people incorporate techniques such as yoga and meditation to calm their minds and release tension when learning how to deal with anger. Whatever your choice is, ensure you take time out to relax when warning signs of anger start to bubble up.

        6. Laugh

        Incorporating humor and laughter on a regular basis will help keep anger in check and help you get over a bad mood and feelings of anger more quickly. This isn’t part of formal anger management techniques, but you’ll be surprised by how well it works. Remember, life is a journey that’s meant to be enjoyed fully along the way through healthy emotion. Make sure you take time to laugh and have fun.Surround yourself with people that like to laugh and enjoy life. Don’t work at a job that just causes you stress, which can lead to anger. Work at something you enjoy doing.

        7. Be Grateful

        It’s easy to focus on the bad in life and the things that cause us negative emotions. It’s vitally important to remind ourselves of all the wonderful things in life that bring us positive emotions, things that we easily forget because we get caught up in the whirlwind of day to day life.

        Take time out each day to remind yourself of a few things you are grateful for in order to help you learn how to release anger and invite in more positive feelings.

        Final Thoughts

        Life can be overwhelming at times. We seem to have constant pressure to achieve more and to always be on the go or motivated. People we are around and situations we are in can cause stress, anger, and negative emotions. At times, it can seem to be too much, and we get angry and our emotions start to get out of control.

        During these times, keep in mind that life is an incredible journey, full of wonder and things that bring you joy. When you find yourself angry more often than is healthy, take time out to remember the good things in life—the things that we seem to forget yet bring us so much positive energy and emotions.

        Use some of the tips included here to help with how to deal with anger and better control your emotions.

        More Resources on Anger Management

        Featured photo credit: Andre Hunter via unsplash.com

        Reference

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