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10 Things You Wish You Knew When You Were a Teenager

10 Things You Wish You Knew When You Were a Teenager

Think back on your teenage years. Awkward, right? How many things do you wish you had know then? How different would your life be if you could go back and change just the slightest thing? Here are 10 things you wish you knew when you were a teenager.

1. You can (and should) be weird!

First and foremost! This is the most important lesson of all. Every teenager is strange—even the straight-A, social butterflies. It’s learning to embrace this weirdness that is so hard to do. When you’re a teenager, you just want to fit in. You want to blend into the crowd and graduate without being picked on. Ironically, as a an adult, it’s important to be unique. It’s at this point that you look back on your strange teenage self and wish you had embraced it then.

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2. You always have a choice.

Don’t feel stuck. Not in anything, be it a friendship, a relationship, a class, or a college path. You’re young, and you have your whole life ahead of you! Don’t get trapped in anything. A single choice can change your life, and you’re at the perfect age to take a different track.

3. You can be anything you want.

You don’t have to become a lawyer because your father is one. You’re in high school, with your whole life ahead of you. What do you want to do? Don’t be discouraged by pressure from grown-ups or counselors. If you love art or music, follow your dreams! But be practical: think of the life you’re trying to make for yourself, and figure out how you can get there.

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4. You don’t have to be a follower.

High school is the prime time to gossip and spread rumors. It’s when it’s “cool” to start drinking and smoking. Everybody’s doing it, but you don’t have to. Rise above the petty drama and be your own person. Stay on the right path and you’ll accomplish more in one semester than the majority will accomplish in their entire high school careers.

5. Your thoughts create things.

Ideas are a gold mine. A comic book about a blue werewolf? Start drawing! Don’t discount anything you think. This is the age when your ideas make you feel like you could conquer the world—and you probably could! Don’t talk yourself out of anything. Follow through on anything that crosses your mind. Providing, of course, that it isn’t dangerous or flat-out ridiculous—no flying on homemade wings!

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6. Cherish your friends.

Your friends have your back. They support you when you have to tackle a difficult presentation, and they’ll talk you down off the ledge when you have a failing grade. Cherish these relationships. Friendships in high school are so valuable because you learn a lot from them about what type of person you want to be, and how you’ll treat friends later.

7. Don’t forget your friends.

This is not a restatement of the last tip. This one is regarding relationships. Too often, teenagers let their boyfriends or girlfriends become their world. Just know that no significant other is better than your true friends. It might seem like it at the time, and the relationship might make you feel special, and you might really like kissing…but more than likely, you’ll be single before too long. An you know who will still be there? Your real friends.

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8. You need to learn forgiveness.

It’s too easy to hold a grudge when someone wrongs you. The hardest part is forgiving someone—but it’s also the most rewarding. If your friend ditches you for a new special someone, even if you never did that to a friend (because you knew, right?), take your friend back when they need you. Be kind and open and forgiving, and you’ll be a person everyone thinks favorably about.

9. Don’t try to be cool.

Don’t work too hard to be cool. Don’t drink, don’t smoke, don’t do drugs. Don’t do anything you feel pressured to do. Do things because they’re the right things and you want to do them. Do that, and you know what? You will be cool.

10. Love yourself.

Read over all these tips again—do you notice a trend? They’re all about being yourself and being true to yourself, which culminates in loving yourself. This might hurt, but it’s best to learn now: There will always be someone better looking than you, more popular than you, smarter than you. Don’t fight it. Don’t hate them because of what they are, and don’t hate yourself for what you think you’re not. Love who you are and be the best you possible.

Featured photo credit: Diversity Teenagers Friends Friendship Team Concept via shutterstock.com

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Last Updated on October 17, 2019

How to Spend More Quality Time with Your Partner

How to Spend More Quality Time with Your Partner

You see your partner every single day. They are the first person you talk to in the morning and the last person you kiss goodnight.

But does seeing each other day in and day out equal a healthy relationship? Not necessarily.

Spending quality time with your partner is the best way to ensure your relationship stays healthy and strong. This means going above and beyond sitting together while you watch Netflix or going out for the occasional dinner. You deserve more from your relationship – and so does your spouse!

What does quality time mean? It means spending time with your spouse without interruption. It’s a chance for you to come together and talk. Communication will build emotional intimacy and trust.

Quality time is also about expressing love in a physical way. Not sex, necessarily (but that’s great, too!) but through hand-holding, cuddling, caressing, and tickling. Studies show that these displays of affection will boost partner satisfaction.[1]

So how do you spend quality time with your partner? Here are 13 relationship tips on making the most out of your time with your partner.

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1. Recognize the Signs

If you want a healthy relationship, you have to learn how to recognize the signs that you need to spend more quality time together.

Some telltale signs include:

  • You’re always on your phones.
  • You value friendships or hobbies over quality time with your spouse.
  • You aren’t together during important events.
  • You are arguing more often or lack connection.
  • You don’t make plans or date nights.
  • You’re not happy.

If you are experiencing any of these relationship symptoms, know that quality time together can reverse the negative effects of the signs above.

2. Try New Things Together

Have you ever wanted to learn how to play an instrument or speak another language? How about skydive or ballroom dance?

Instead of viewing these as solo hobbies and interests, why not involve your partner?

Trying new activities together builds healthy relationships because it encourages spouses to rely on one another for emotional and physical support.

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Shared hobbies also promote marital friendship, and the Journal of Happiness Studies found that marital satisfaction was twice as high for couples who viewed each other as best friends.[2]

3. Schedule in Tech-Free Time

Your phone is a great way to listen to music, watch videos, and keep up-to-date with friends and family. But is your phone good for your relationship?

Many couples phone snub, or ‘phub’, one another. Studies show that phubbing can lower relationship satisfaction and increase one’s chances of depression.[3]

Reduce those chances by removing distractions when spending quality time together and showing your partner they have your full attention.

4. Hit the Gym as a Couple

One way you can spend more time together as a couple is by becoming workout partners. Studies show that couples are more likely to stay with their exercise routine if they work out together.[4] Couples also work out harder than they would solo. One study found that 95 percent of couples who work out together maintained weight loss compares to the 66 percent of singles who did.[5]

Join a gym, do at-home couples’ workouts, try couples yoga, hit the hiking trails, or get your bikes out. No matter which way you choose to exercise, these healthy activities can promote a healthy relationship.

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5. Cook Meals Together

Pop open a bottle of wine or put some romantic music on while you get busy – in the kitchen, of course!

One of the best relationship tips for spending quality time together when you both have busy schedules is to cook meals together.[6]

Spice things up and try and prepare a four-course meal or a fancy French dish together. Not only is this a fun way to spend your time together, but it also promotes teamwork.

If all goes well, you’ll have a romantic date night meal at home that you prepared with your four hands. And if the food didn’t turn out the way you’d hoped, you are guaranteed to have a laugh and create new memories together.

6. Have a Regular Date Night

Couples experience a greater sense of happiness and less stress when they are spending quality time together.[7] One of the biggest relationship tips for a healthy partnership is to include a date night in your weekly routine.

The National Marriage Project found that having a weekly date night can make your relationship seem more exciting and helps prevent relationship boredom.[8] It also lowers the probability of divorce, improves your sex life, and increases healthy communication.

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Some great ideas for what to do on your date night include:

  • Have a movie marathon – Gather up your favorite flicks and cuddle up on the couch.
  • Play games together – Cards, board games, video games, and other creative outlets are a fun way to spend quality time together.
  • Recreate your first date – Go back to that restaurant and order the same meal you did when you first got together. You can spice up your evening by pretending you’re strangers meeting for the first time and see how sexy the night gets.
  • Plan a weekend getaway – There’s nothing better than traveling with the one you love.
  • Dinner and a movie – A classic!
  • Try a new restaurant – Make it your mission to rate and try all of the Mexican restaurants/Irish pubs/Italian trattorias in your area.
  • Have a long sex session – Intimacy promotes the release of the oxytocin hormone which is responsible for a myriad of great feelings.[9]

Here’re even more date night ideas for your reference: 50 Unique and Really Fun Date Ideas for Couples

Final Thoughts

The benefits of spending quality time together are endless. Here are just some of the ways it can contribute to a healthy relationship:

  • Improves emotional and physical intimacy
  • Lowers divorce rates
  • Improves communication
  • Reduces marital boredom
  • Bonds couples closer
  • Improves friendship
  • Boosts health
  • Reduces stress

These are all excellent reasons to start making date night a regular part of your week.

It’s easy to have a healthy relationship when you set aside dedicated time to share with your spouse. Try new things together, make your spouse your workout buddy, and look for innovative ways to be close and connected.

These relationship tips will bring great benefits to your marriage.

Featured photo credit: Allen Taylor via unsplash.com

Reference

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