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10 Things People Do Differently To Make Their Life Happier

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10 Things People Do Differently To Make Their Life Happier

You’ve tried everything and its flat out not working; you just cant seem to make your life happier. You probably have a great family and friends, and happy home but there is something missing. What is that?

Getting to know yourself and why you do the things you do will help, tremendously, and an insight into your own actions can help you make necessary changes as well.What other simple changes can you make to experience a happier life; would you believe me if I told you this was even possible?

Well there are changes you can make and I’m about to share them with you right now.

Here are 10 Things People Do Differently To Make Their Life Happier:

1. They live by their own rules

Its easy to follow along with what everybody else is doing – working a nine to five, following the latest fashion trends, keeping up with the neighbors, latest gadgets and so on. This can get to a point which can make you frustrated, lost and even not quite knowing why. The alternative is to realize your daily actions. Are you doing something because everyone else is doing it, or are you doing what you really want to do? Living by your own rules being consciously aware of your actions, doing the things in life not by any ones standards but your own.

In essence a happier life involves living by your own rules.

2. They accept who they are

You’re not ‘perfect’ and you never will be. This is actually a good thing because all those little quirks and weird (but wonderful) ideas you have make you special, they make you, you. Your gifts and talents are unique and exclusive to you only, your job is figure them out and use them to your advantage.

Chasing perfection is exhausting and a waste of time. Accept who you are, stop trying to be what you’re not and you’ll find true happiness” -Sarah Moores

3. They say goodbye to dream stealers

They are out there and probably closer than you think. In the form of your friends, family, teachers, spouses and society in general. These folk mean well but say the wrong thing most the time. It’s probably hard if loved ones try to sway you from what you want to do that doesn’t fit in with a conventional society, however your dreams are more important than what others have to say. Listening to someones ‘meaningful’ advice doesn’t have to mean you do what they say, especially when it comes to living the life of your dreams.

Beware the dream stealers, stay aligned and hold tight to your vision” – Kate Spence

4. They are grateful for everything in life

I received an email from one of my readers who said she was not happy and couldn’t manifest all the things she had been trying to bring into her life. I told her, instead of trying to ‘manifest’  new things into her life, start to be grateful for all you have. So now you know my secret to happiness; simply, gratitude.

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Gratitude turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos into order, confusion into clarity…it makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.” – Melody Beattie

5. They take full responsibility everyday

This is an important principal, only when you take full responsibility for everything that happens in your life will your life then be transformed. If you blame other people, the weather, or circumstances you are not taking control of your own life. So you’re probably thinking what does it actually mean to take responsibility for your life? It means making choices based on your current situation and no matter what do not not blame anything outside yourself.

You must take personal responsibility. You cannot change the circumstances, the seasons, or the wind but you can change yourself.” – Jim Rohn

6. They follow their dreams while enjoying the present

Following your dreams is possible with a little planning and work put in. To do this you must know your values, strengths and passions. Every great leader knows who they are and what they believe in and stand for. You should too. This will not only leave you with the confidence in knowing who you are and what you will do in life, but you will be way happier guaranteed! While you follow your dreams, don’t forget to enjoy the journey and make your life enjoyable now. Spend time with people that matter and do things that you really want to do.

Live a life you love – one designed for you, by following your dreams and enjoying each day!

7. They read

Reading is a cool and mind bending experience, allowing you to either get lost in an adventure or learn about stuff other people don’t know about. Reading can serve as a getaway and develop your creativity and imagination. It can also improve self worth by learning an area where you struggle, so it’s a great self help tool making your life much happier. Reading provides you with endless possibilities and feelings of emotional learning and fun!

Always read something that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.” –P.J. O’Rourke

8. They accept other people as they come

You may be the kind of person who finds others annoying by the the things they say or do, they make your life a misery, and when you are around them you get frustrated. You can flip this around by accepting others as they come – their quirks, annoyances, character and who they are. When you do you will find you have mastered the control of your own emotions by staying relaxed when other people used to annoy you. The truth is they are not annoying you they are being themselves.

Most people can’t understand how others can blow their noses differently than they do.” – Ivan Tugenev

9. They learn to be optimistic

I believe optimism is the secret to happiness and health; many studies have shown this to also be the case. Having a positive outlook on life and in everything you do will sure to make your life happier too. When you expect bad things to happen, they will, and you will always find things to be unhappy about. Being optimistic is about seeing past your current situation and seeing a positive end result. Even when this may not happen, optimistic people take on the attitude of getting past obstacles by learning from lessons and mistakes, but seeing a clear positive end result.

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Optimism is the medicine to your health and happiness

10. They know happiness is a choice

Bottom line… Happiness is a choice, you create your own happiness by realizing that happiness comes from within yourself. Happiness is a mindset, the way you manage the outcome to a situation. There are things that can give you happiness momentarily, like, money, cars, clothes, a big house etc, but true lasting happiness stays with you forever when you find it. Put into practice even just some of these things people do differently to make their life happier and you will see a positive change.

Remember:

Happiness is a choice. You can choose to be happy. There’s going to be stress in life, but it’s your choice whether you let it affect you or not.” – Valerie Bertinelli

Featured photo credit: Beauty Winter Girl Blowing Snow in frosty winter Park. Outdoors. Flying Snowflakes. Sunny day. Backlit. Joyful Beauty young woman Having Fun in Winter Park. Defocused via shutterstock.com

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More by this author

Diana Reid

CEO - Moxie House Ltd

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Last Updated on July 20, 2021

How to Overcome the Fear of Public Speaking (A Step-by-Step Guide)

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How to Overcome the Fear of Public Speaking (A Step-by-Step Guide)

You’re standing behind the curtain, just about to make your way on stage to face the many faces half-shrouded in darkness in front of you. As you move towards the spotlight, your body starts to feel heavier with each step. A familiar thump echoes throughout your body – your heartbeat has gone off the charts.

Don’t worry, you’re not the only one with glossophobia(also known as speech anxiety or the fear of speaking to large crowds). Sometimes, the anxiety happens long before you even stand on stage.

Your body’s defence mechanism responds by causing a part of your brain to release adrenaline into your blood – the same chemical that gets released as if you were being chased by a lion.

Here’s a step-by-step guide to help you overcome your fear of public speaking:

1. Prepare yourself mentally and physically

According to experts, we’re built to display anxiety and to recognize it in others. If your body and mind are anxious, your audience will notice. Hence, it’s important to prepare yourself before the big show so that you arrive on stage confident, collected and ready.

“Your outside world is a reflection of your inside world. What goes on in the inside, shows on the outside.” – Bob Proctor

Exercising lightly before a presentation helps get your blood circulating and sends oxygen to the brain. Mental exercises, on the other hand, can help calm the mind and nerves. Here are some useful ways to calm your racing heart when you start to feel the butterflies in your stomach:

Warming up

If you’re nervous, chances are your body will feel the same way. Your body gets tense, your muscles feel tight or you’re breaking in cold sweat. The audience will notice you are nervous.

If you observe that this is exactly what is happening to you minutes before a speech, do a couple of stretches to loosen and relax your body. It’s better to warm up before every speech as it helps to increase the functional potential of the body as a whole. Not only that, it increases muscle efficiency, improves reaction time and your movements.

Here are some exercises to loosen up your body before show time:

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  1. Neck and shoulder rolls – This helps relieve upper body muscle tension and pressure as the rolls focus on rotating the head and shoulders, loosening the muscle. Stress and anxiety can make us rigid within this area which can make you feel agitated, especially when standing.
  2. Arm stretches – We often use this part of our muscles during a speech or presentation through our hand gestures and movements. Stretching these muscles can reduce arm fatigue, loosen you up and improve your body language range.
  3. Waist twists – Place your hands on your hips and rotate your waist in a circular motion. This exercise focuses on loosening the abdominal and lower back regions which is essential as it can cause discomfort and pain, further amplifying any anxieties you may experience.

Stay hydrated

Ever felt parched seconds before speaking? And then coming up on stage sounding raspy and scratchy in front of the audience? This happens because the adrenaline from stage fright causes your mouth to feel dried out.

To prevent all that, it’s essential we stay adequately hydrated before a speech. A sip of water will do the trick. However, do drink in moderation so that you won’t need to go to the bathroom constantly.

Try to avoid sugary beverages and caffeine, since it’s a diuretic – meaning you’ll feel thirstier. It will also amplify your anxiety which prevents you from speaking smoothly.

Meditate

Meditation is well-known as a powerful tool to calm the mind. ABC’s Dan Harris, co-anchor of Nightline and Good Morning America weekend and author of the book titled10% Happier , recommends that meditation can help individuals to feel significantly calmer, faster.

Meditation is like a workout for your mind. It gives you the strength and focus to filter out the negativity and distractions with words of encouragement, confidence and strength.

Mindfulness meditation, in particular, is a popular method to calm yourself before going up on the big stage. The practice involves sitting comfortably, focusing on your breathing and then bringing your mind’s attention to the present without drifting into concerns about the past or future – which likely includes floundering on stage.

Here’s a nice example of guided meditation before public speaking:

2. Focus on your goal

One thing people with a fear of public speaking have in common is focusing too much on themselves and the possibility of failure.

Do I look funny? What if I can’t remember what to say? Do I look stupid? Will people listen to me? Does anyone care about what I’m talking about?’

Instead of thinking this way, shift your attention to your one true purpose – contributing something of value to your audience.

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Decide on the progress you’d like your audience to make after your presentation. Notice their movements and expressions to adapt your speech to ensure that they are having a good time to leave the room as better people.

If your own focus isn’t beneficial and what it should be when you’re speaking, then shift it to what does. This is also key to establishing trust during your presentation as the audience can clearly see that you have their interests at heart.[1]

3. Convert negativity to positivity

There are two sides constantly battling inside of us – one is filled with strength and courage while the other is doubt and insecurities. Which one will you feed?

‘What if I mess up this speech? What if I’m not funny enough? What if I forget what to say?’

It’s no wonder why many of us are uncomfortable giving a presentation. All we do is bring ourselves down before we got a chance to prove ourselves. This is also known as a self-fulfilling prophecy – a belief that comes true because we are acting as if it already is. If you think you’re incompetent, then it will eventually become true.

Motivational coaches tout that positive mantras and affirmations tend to boost your confidents for the moments that matter most. Say to yourself: “I’ll ace this speech and I can do it!”

Take advantage of your adrenaline rush to encourage positive outcome rather than thinking of the negative ‘what ifs’.

Here’s a video of Psychologist Kelly McGonigal who encourages her audience to turn stress into something positive as well as provide methods on how to cope with it:

4. Understand your content

Knowing your content at your fingertips helps reduce your anxiety because there is one less thing to worry about. One way to get there is to practice numerous times before your actual speech.

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However, memorizing your script word-for-word is not encouraged. You can end up freezing should you forget something. You’ll also risk sounding unnatural and less approachable.

“No amount of reading or memorizing will make you successful in life. It is the understanding and the application of wise thought that counts.” – Bob Proctor

Many people unconsciously make the mistake of reading from their slides or memorizing their script word-for-word without understanding their content – a definite way to stress themselves out.

Understanding your speech flow and content makes it easier for you to convert ideas and concepts into your own words which you can then clearly explain to others in a conversational manner. Designing your slides to include text prompts is also an easy hack to ensure you get to quickly recall your flow when your mind goes blank.[2]

One way to understand is to memorize the over-arching concepts or ideas in your pitch. It helps you speak more naturally and let your personality shine through. It’s almost like taking your audience on a journey with a few key milestones.

5. Practice makes perfect

Like most people, many of us are not naturally attuned to public speaking. Rarely do individuals walk up to a large audience and present flawlessly without any research and preparation.

In fact, some of the top presenters make it look easy during showtime because they have spent countless hours behind-the-scenes in deep practice. Even great speakers like the late John F. Kennedy would spend months preparing his speech beforehand.

Public speaking, like any other skill, requires practice – whether it be practicing your speech countless of times in front of a mirror or making notes. As the saying goes, practice makes perfect!

6. Be authentic

There’s nothing wrong with feeling stressed before going up to speak in front of an audience.

Many people fear public speaking because they fear others will judge them for showing their true, vulnerable self. However, vulnerability can sometimes help you come across as more authentic and relatable as a speaker.

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Drop the pretence of trying to act or speak like someone else and you’ll find that it’s worth the risk. You become more genuine, flexible and spontaneous, which makes it easier to handle unpredictable situations – whether it’s getting tough questions from the crowd or experiencing an unexpected technical difficulty.

To find out your authentic style of speaking is easy. Just pick a topic or issue you are passionate about and discuss this like you normally would with a close family or friend. It is like having a conversation with someone in a personal one-to-one setting. A great way to do this on stage is to select a random audience member(with a hopefully calming face) and speak to a single person at a time during your speech. You’ll find that it’s easier trying to connect to one person at a time than a whole room.

With that said, being comfortable enough to be yourself in front of others may take a little time and some experience, depending how comfortable you are with being yourself in front of others. But once you embrace it, stage fright will not be as intimidating as you initially thought.

Presenters like Barack Obama are a prime example of a genuine and passionate speaker:

7. Post speech evaluation

Last but not the least, if you’ve done public speaking and have been scarred from a bad experience, try seeing it as a lesson learned to improve yourself as a speaker.

Don’t beat yourself up after a presentation

We are the hardest on ourselves and it’s good to be. But when you finish delivering your speech or presentation, give yourself some recognition and a pat on the back.

You managed to finish whatever you had to do and did not give up. You did not let your fears and insecurities get to you. Take a little more pride in your work and believe in yourself.

Improve your next speech

As mentioned before, practice does make perfect. If you want to improve your public speaking skills, try asking someone to film you during a speech or presentation. Afterwards, watch and observe what you can do to improve yourself next time.

Here are some questions you can ask yourself after every speech:

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  • How did I do?
  • Are there any areas for improvement?
  • Did I sound or look stressed?
  • Did I stumble on my words? Why?
  • Was I saying “um” too often?
  • How was the flow of the speech?

Write everything you observed down and keep practicing and improving. In time, you’ll be able to better manage your fears of public speaking and appear more confident when it counts.

If you want even more tips about public speaking or delivering a great presentation, check out these articles too:

Reference

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