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10 Relationship Mistakes that Women Make

10 Relationship Mistakes that Women Make

 A relationship is as it’s people are, imperfect, flawed, but mostly unique

Every relationship is unique. Sometimes women do things, often without realizing it, that can impair a relationship. Here are a few things to keep in mind.

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Stop Undervaluing Yourself

It’s very easy to be vulnerable and insecure in today’s world. You are constantly required to prove yourself and face success and failure almost successively. It is therefore easy to diminish one’s self esteem and self worth. Try not to undervalue yourself. Know that you are worth everything in the world and that everything you get, you deserve.

Stop Relying Completely On Your Partner

To lean on someone for support isn’t bad, however to depend on someone to the extent that they become a crutch is a very unhealthy idea that then makes your self-worth, your emotional stability and your happiness dependent on something you have no control over. Do rely on your partner for support, not for neediness .

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Stop Neglecting Communication

Sometimes it’s hard to understand someone. This is especially true if you’re upset, angry, or sad so it’s easier to just drop the topic of conversation. However it is always a good idea to talk, ask, communicate in a relationship especially if you feel like your cannot understand your partner’s need or his way of communicating. Doing so will strengthen your relationship and give both of you a better idea of each other.

Stop Trying to Change Him

Men and women in our generation and that preceding ours, (thanks to huge gender binary that we were brought up in) are quite different in the way they think, act, and behave. Not everyone , of course, but a lot of them. There will be things about your partner that you’ll like and there will be some you don’t. You would’ve probably preferred it if he didn’t have those traits, however, now that he does, take them with a pinch of salt and try to get used to them. Don’t try to change him to your liking, instead focus more on what you like and less on what you don’t!

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Stop Undermining What He Does for You

Some men are familiar with women’s ideas of romantic. However, most men, though absolutely loving, seldom keep up with a woman’s definition of romantic. Keep in mind that just because he doesn’t know the things you didn’t tell him, doesn’t make him uncaring. If there is something you want him to do, just tell him straight up. It’ll make your life easier and his too!

Stop Being Too Picky Over Things You Can’t Control

Memories are created by those who don’t fret the little details. Seldom do things in life go just the way you want them to. Getting upset when plans are changed is very normal, however to brood over those changes or throw tantrums or have constant snide remarks can ruin a memory in progress and spoil yours and your partner’s mood. Unless the change in plans is something you absolutely cannot accept and adversely affects your health or your safety, try to not sweat the details and instead enjoy the time with what can now be a surprise element!

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Stop Trying to Tie Him Down

As a way of ensuring security within the relationship, often some women tend to demand long term commitments. There is of course nothing wrong with wanting a secure lasting relationship, however you must bear in mind that by tying him down, you too will be tied down to a man, you may not even love five years from now. We all change and evolve as individuals and though the notion of growing old with someone or of marrying your high school sweetheart may seen enticing, it isn’t for everyone. So give yourself time and also him. To strengthen your relationship and eliminate the sense of insecurity, talk to your partner and together figure out a way to make you feel more secure.

Stop Cheating

There are no restrictions on ones thoughts and there shouldn’t be. To think freely is a basic right that we enjoy. However to act upon your thoughts is a very different story. Relationships go through difficult phases and it’s during those phases that we tend to be susceptible, a little insecure and sometimes unhappy. If that is the case, talk to your partner. In case you want something different that your current relationship cannot give you, then have courage and break it off. If not, then do not break the trust you and partner share, for a moment’s weakness or on an impulse. It’s absolutely imperative that you treat your partner they way you want your partner to treat you. So be loyal.

Stop Making His Decisions

We all like to have a certain degree of say in our partner’s choices and decisions. It makes one feel special and important, but many times we can overdo. Remember how it feels when someone interferes with your decision making? Exactly. Don’t make his decisions for him.

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Sanah Rizvi

Sanah is an influential public speaker and a devoted advocator of female rights.

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Last Updated on September 17, 2019

10 Simple Ways To Always Think Positive Thoughts

10 Simple Ways To Always Think Positive Thoughts

Positive thinking can lead to a lot of positive change in your life. Developing an optimistic outlook can be good for both your physical and mental health.

But sometimes, certain situations arise in life that makes it hard to keep a positive outlook. Take steps to make positive thinking become more like your second nature and you’ll reap the biggest benefits.

Here are 10 ways to make thinking positive thoughts easy:

1. Spend Time with Positive People

If you surround yourself with constant complainers, their negativity is likely to rub off on you.

Spend time with positive friends and family members to increase the likelihood that their positive thinking habits will become yours too. It’s hard to be negative when everyone around you is so positive.

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2. Take Responsibility for Your Behavior

When you encounter problems and difficulties in life, don’t play the role of the victim. Acknowledge your role in the situation and take responsibility for your behavior.

Accepting responsibility can help you learn from mistakes and prevent you from blaming others unfairly.

3. Contribute to the Community

One of the best ways to feel good about what you have, is to focus on what you have to give.

Volunteer in some manner and give back to the community. Helping others can give you a new outlook on the world and can assist you with positive thinking.

4. Read Positive and Inspirational Materials

Spend time each day reading something that encourages positive thinking. Read the Bible, spiritual material, or inspirational quotes to help you focus on what’s important to you in life. It can be a great way to start and end your day.

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Some recommendations for you:

5. Recognize and Replace Negative Thoughts

You won’t be successful at positive thinking if you’re still plagued by frequent negative thoughts. Learn to recognize and replace thoughts that are overly negative. Often, thoughts that include words like “always” and “never” signal that they aren’t true.

If you find yourself thinking something such as, “I always mess everything up,” replace it with something more realistic such as, “Sometimes I make mistakes but I learn from them.”

There’s no need to make your thoughts unrealistically positive, but instead, make them more realistic.

6. Establish and Work Toward Goals

It’s easier to be positive about problems and setbacks when you have goals that you’re working toward. Goals will give you motivation to overcome those obstacles when you encounter problems along the way. Without clear goals, it’s harder to make decisions and gauge your progress.

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Learn to set SMART goals to help you achieve more.

7. Consider the Consequences of Negativity

Spend some time thinking about the consequences of negative thinking. Often, it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

For example, a person who thinks, “I probably won’t get this job interview,” may put less effort into the interview. As a result, he may decrease his chances of getting the job.

Create a list of all the ways negative thinking impacts your life. It likely influences your behavior, your relationships, and your feelings. Then, create a list of the ways in which positive thinking could be beneficial.

8. Offer Compliments to Others

Look for reasons to compliment others. Be genuine in your praise and compliments, but offer it frequently. This will help you look for the good in other people.

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9. Create a Daily Gratitude List

If you start keeping a daily gratitude list, you’ll start noticing exactly how much you have to be thankful for. This can help you focus on the positive in your life instead of thinking about all the bad things that have happened in the day.

Getting in the habit of showing an attitude of gratitude makes positive thinking more of a habit. Here’re 40 Simple Ways To Practice Gratitude.

10. Practice Self-Care

Take good care of yourself and you’ll be more equipped to think positively.

Get plenty of rest and exercise and practice managing your stress well. Taking care of your physical and mental health will provide you with more energy to focus on positive thinking.

Learn about these 30 Self-Care Habits for a Strong and Healthy Mind, Body and Spirit.

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Featured photo credit: DESIGNECOLOGIST via unsplash.com

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