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10 Little Things Happy Couples Remember To Do Every Day

10 Little Things Happy Couples Remember To Do Every Day

Ancient men discovered fire-making in a not so easy manner of friction. And just like fire-making, starting up and maintaining a good relationship is not an easy task that couple must do for a long period of time.

Relationships start with a spark that will later on turn to flame. And the flame that is present can only go in two ways: it can either be a never-ending sustained fire of love or an ember that will later turn into cold coal.

Thus, it’s very important for couples to take time in doing simple ways to keep the fire burning. So here are top 10 little things happy couples remember to do every day.

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1. They provide quality attention to each other.

We already live in a world where everything can just be posted in a wall or can tweeted. It’s quite been an excuse for us not to give too much attention to the people we are with physically. Let’s face it, it’s quite an annoying reality that we all live by especially for couples. And it has been said, time is the most precious gift that you can give to someone. And with time coupled with quality attention, surely a fire will keep on burning.

2. They go the extra mile to help each other.

Our differences send us to quest for our common goals. And as couples, there are plenty of things that can hinder us to understand each other but there is definitely one that will. When we understand each other, we go the extra mile of helping not just ourselves but also our partner to always rekindle the fire that we have. Sometimes, being together for a long period of time make the relationship too fluid. But always make sure that it wouldn’t kill the fire. So a little more understanding for each other everyday will go a long way.

3. They express appreciation.

Time, money and effort are apparent ingredients in a relationship. And while it is true that when you are in a relationship, everything is conjugal, not everything is sent by heaven for free. So when your partner gives you something, always compliment it or at least just say thank you. It never hurts also to return the favor as well.

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4. They say Yes.

At times , our partner would ask us favors that we might not like. Or there might be times that we just do not want to give in to their whims. But our momentary submission might mean a lot to them. Sometimes, just say YES!

5. They check in.

Checking into a hotel once in a while gives couple a chance to have a wick of adventure lit up. It’s not everyday that you can do it but checking into a nice hotel overnight will relish a special feeling between the both of you as you relax and reminisce your best memories as lovers.

6. They pucker up.

Puckering up is not just for teenagers. Puckering up among couples is a cute way of sending a clear message that I am enjoying your presence. Probably for us adults, puckering up is also a wholesome way of how we flirt with our partner. Simple yet effective. Pucker up now!

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7. They make fun with each other.

Most of the time, being corny and cheesy sets the mood for couples to be stronger and tighter. And there’s no easier way to do this but to be make fun with and of each other. Besides, best of friends bond too much by doing weird things with each other. Why not do it with your honey?

8. They leave sweets notes or even text with each other.

Communication is king in relationship. And the best fuel to keep the fire burning are sweet words coupled with concrete actions. But in days that you can’t be together or being with each other physically is quite impossible, leaving sweet notes and/or text messages will compensate for it. Your partner will just like be a kid who got a penny under his/her pillow from a Tooth Fairy.

9. They tolerate their partner’s little mistakes.

It has been said and it was said all over again: No one is perfect. And each flaw that each of us have can be stitched together into something perfect using the thread of acceptance of other people. And when conflict arises, isn’t it a good way of peacekeeping if we just stay calm and keep the bad words we’re going to say to our partner? We don’t want to create a smoke out of negativity-induced fire. We just want to keep the positive fire burning.

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10. They smile when potential conflict fires up.

The idiom “There’s no smoke when there’s no fire” connotes something more of a wildfire rather than a torch of burning passion in a relationship. But when the former persists, a sweet smile will do a small trick of pacifying an onslaught of emotional backfire. If it still doesn’t work, flash another smile again and try to be sweet. Your partner will probably return the favor leading you to a better position of talking things over with a sane mind.

Relationships will always have elements involved paralleling emotions that partners feel in a given period of time. Among these elements, fire sends out a message of warmth and passion. And to sum it up, let me give you a quote of Bruce Lee: “Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, our hearts mature and our love becomes as coals, deep-burning and unquenchable.”

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Last Updated on January 15, 2021

7 Ways To Have More Confident Body Language

7 Ways To Have More Confident Body Language

The popular idiomatic saying that “actions speak louder than words” has been around for centuries, but even to this day, most people struggle with at least one area of nonverbal communication. Consequently, many of us aspire to have more confident body language but don’t have the knowledge and tools necessary to change what are largely unconscious behaviors.

Given that others’ perceptions of our competence and confidence are predominantly influenced by what we do with our faces and bodies, it’s important to develop greater self-awareness and consciously practice better posture, stance, eye contact, facial expressions, hand movements, and other aspects of body language.

Posture

First things first: how is your posture? Let’s start with a quick self-assessment of your body.

  • Are your shoulders slumped over or rolled back in an upright posture?
  • When you stand up, do you evenly distribute your weight or lean excessively to one side?
  • Does your natural stance place your feet relatively shoulder-width apart or are your feet and legs close together in a closed-off position?
  • When you sit, does your lower back protrude out in a slumped position or maintain a straight, spine-friendly posture in your seat?

All of these are important considerations to make when evaluating and improving your posture and stance, which will lead to more confident body language over time. If you routinely struggle with maintaining good posture, consider buying a posture trainer/corrector, consulting a chiropractor or physical therapist, stretching daily, and strengthening both your core and back muscles.

Facial Expressions

Are you prone to any of the following in personal or professional settings?

  • Bruxism (tight, clenched jaw or grinding teeth)
  • Frowning and/or furrowing brows
  • Avoiding direct eye contact and/or staring at the ground

If you answered “yes” to any of these, then let’s start by examining various ways in which you can project confident body language through your facial expressions.

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1. Understand How Others Perceive Your Facial Expressions

A December 2020 study by UC Berkeley and Google researchers utilized a deep neural network to analyze facial expressions in six million YouTube clips representing people from over 140 countries. The study found that, despite socio-cultural differences, people around the world tended to use about 70% of the same facial expressions in response to different emotional stimuli and situations.[1]

The study’s researchers also published a fascinating interactive map to demonstrate how their machine learning technology assessed various facial expressions and determined subtle differences in emotional responses.

This study highlights the social importance of facial expressions because whether or not we’re consciously aware of them—by gazing into a mirror or your screen on a video conferencing platform—how we present our faces to others can have tremendous impacts on their perceptions of us, our confidence, and our emotional states. This awareness is the essential first step towards

2. Relax Your Face

New research on bruxism and facial tension found the stresses and anxieties of Covid-19 lockdowns led to considerable increases in orofacial pain, jaw-clenching, and teeth grinding, particularly among women.[2]

The National Institute of Dental and Craniofacial Research estimates that more than 10 million Americans alone have temporomandibular joint dysfunction (TMJ syndrome), and facial tension can lead to other complications such as insomnia, wrinkles, dry skin, and dark, puffy bags under your eyes.[3])

To avoid these unpleasant outcomes, start practicing progressive muscle relaxation techniques and taking breaks more frequently throughout the day to moderate facial tension.[4] You should also try out some biofeedback techniques to enhance your awareness of involuntary bodily processes like facial tension and achieve more confident body language as a result.[5]

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3. Improve Your Eye Contact

Did you know there’s an entire subfield of kinesic communication research dedicated to eye movements and behaviors called oculesics?[6] It refers to various communication behaviors including direct eye contact, averting one’s gaze, pupil dilation/constriction, and even frequency of blinking. All of these qualities can shape how other people perceive you, which means that eye contact is yet another area of nonverbal body language that we should be more mindful of in social interactions.

The ideal type (direct/indirect) and duration of eye contact depends on a variety of factors, such as cultural setting, differences in power/authority/age between the parties involved, and communication context. Research has shown that differences in the effects of eye contact are particularly prominent when comparing East Asian and Western European/North American cultures.[7]

To improve your eye contact with others, strive to maintain consistent contact for at least 3 to 4 seconds at a time, consciously consider where you’re looking while listening to someone else, and practice eye contact as much as possible (as strange as this may seem in the beginning, it’s the best way to improve).

3. Smile More

There are many benefits to smiling and laughing, and when it comes to working on more confident body language, this is an area that should be fun, low-stakes, and relatively stress-free.

Smiling is associated with the “happiness chemical” dopamine and the mood-stabilizing hormone, serotonin. Many empirical studies have shown that smiling generally leads to positive outcomes for the person smiling, and further research has shown that smiling can influence listeners’ perceptions of our confidence and trustworthiness as well.

4. Hand Gestures

Similar to facial expressions and posture, what you do with your hands while speaking or listening in a conversation can significantly influence others’ perceptions of you in positive or negative ways.

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It’s undoubtedly challenging to consciously account for all of your nonverbal signals while simultaneously trying to stay engaged with the verbal part of the discussion, but putting in the effort to develop more bodily awareness now will make it much easier to unconsciously project more confident body language later on.

5. Enhance Your Handshake

In the article, “An Anthropology of the Handshake,” University of Copenhagen social anthropology professor Bjarke Oxlund assessed the future of handshaking in wake of the Covid-19 pandemic:[8]

“Handshakes not only vary in function and meaning but do so according to social context, situation and scale. . . a public discussion should ensue on the advantages and disadvantages of holding on to the tradition of shaking hands as the conventional gesture of greeting and leave-taking in a variety of circumstances.”

It’s too early to determine some of the ways in which Covid-19 has permanently changed our social norms and professional etiquette standards, but it’s reasonable to assume that handshaking may retain its importance in American society even after this pandemic. To practice more confident body language in the meantime, the video on the science of the perfect handshake below explains what you need to know.

6. Complement Your Verbals With Hand Gestures

As you know by now, confident communication involves so much more than simply smiling more or sounding like you know what you’re talking about. What you do with your hands can be particularly influential in how others perceive you, whether you’re fidgeting with an object, clenching your fists, hiding your hands in your pockets, or calmly gesturing to emphasize important points you’re discussing.

Social psychology researchers have found that “iconic gestures”—hand movements that appear to be meaningfully related to the speaker’s verbal content—can have profound impacts on listeners’ information retention. In other words, people are more likely to engage with you and remember more of what you said when you speak with complementary hand gestures instead of just your voice.[9]

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Further research on hand gestures has shown that even your choice of the left or right hand for gesturing can influence your ability to clearly convey information to listeners, which supports the notion that more confident body language is readily achievable through greater self-awareness and deliberate nonverbal actions.[10]

Final Takeaways

Developing better posture, enhancing your facial expressiveness, and practicing hand gestures can vastly improve your communication with other people. At first, it will be challenging to consciously practice nonverbal behaviors that many of us are accustomed to performing daily without thinking about them.

If you ever feel discouraged, however, remember that there’s no downside to consistently putting in just a little more time and effort to increase your bodily awareness. With the tips and strategies above, you’ll be well on your way to embracing more confident body language and amplifying others’ perceptions of you in no time.

More Tips on How to Develop a Confident Body Language

Featured photo credit: Maria Lupan via unsplash.com

Reference

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