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Last Updated on November 26, 2020

How the 5 Pillars of Life Help You Achieve Balance in Life

How the 5 Pillars of Life Help You Achieve Balance in Life

Have you recently had the chance to pause, take a look at where you are in life, and consider your current aspirations or values? Everyone has different priorities and milestones they want to accomplish. We call these goals our pillars of life.

When imagining a pillar, you might picture structures that hold up a house or make up a grand entryway for a building. The pillars of life can be thought of similarly. They are foundations that exist to guide us and give us stability. If you feel uncertain about the future, consider striving to build 5 pillars of life: career, money, love, purpose, and enthusiasm.

Through these tangible coaching tips, you will be able to strengthen your pillars and achieve more balance in life.

1. Define Your Career Goals

Maybe you take pride in having worked for the same company for twenty years, or perhaps you finally followed your heart and started your own nonprofit. Having a career does simply mean committing yourself to a nine to five job. It could be contributing to any organization, as an employee, volunteer, or owner. It is all about taking our desire to learn and making an impact. We do this by giving energy to the business side of ourselves, utilizing our troubleshooting skills, and defining our work ethic.

Everyone has slivers of a career in their daily lives. Stay-at-home parents are in charge of the bills for the house, a college student might volunteer on the weekends, and a restaurant employee could be working to become a manager one day.

If this pillar is not as strong as you desire or you are looking to switch gears in life, consider going back to school. It is never too late to earn new credentials or certifications, even online. If you feel like you have lost your compass when it comes to your career, take a survey or personality test that will help determine what profession best suits you.

For example, donating time or resources to a cause you care about may lead to discovering a gift for fundraising or communicating with people. From there, the opportunity for a career change might grow. If you are currently an administrative assistant but aspire to move into management, try shadowing your boss to learn how they became a leader.

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Once you define your career goals, you will feel more clarity and balance in pursuing your aspirations.

2. Allow Money to Work for You

Becoming a millionaire does not have to be a goal, but money is an important pillar in life. It pays for the essentials and allows us to achieve milestones, such as buying our first home, saving for retirement, or taking a dream trip.

Money also helps us provide for our kids, pets, and ourselves in whatever way we desire. Consider what your financial needs are for you to feel comfortable in life. How much money you need or what you do with it is up for interpretation. You might want to live a frugal lifestyle and only spend on necessities, or maybe you spend money the minute you get it. Either way, there is value in respecting money because you will find good things come your way when you are deliberate with your funds.

If you stash away five dollars into a piggy bank every month, one day you will be thankful when your savings amounts to hundreds or thousands of dollars. You could also look into the retirement plans available at your place of employment. See if they have incentives that make you want to save more, which will give you peace of mind for the future.

Some people work an extra job on the weekends because they enjoy having added spending money for fancy dinners or they are saving up to start their own business. If you are a parent, consider teaching your kids the significance of money, which encourages them to work harder to earn things they desire. Money not only allows us to achieve our goals, but it also motivates us to be proactive.

When you define what your money pillar looks like, you have an anchor to hold on to that keeps your financial life balanced. You will discover that when you value money, it will grow and work for you.

3. Discover Variations of Love

We all have that desire to nurture and bond with someone or something. Loving and being loved by family, a significant other, a friend, or a four-legged buddy is a warm feeling that we all appreciate.

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Love comes in many forms, and you can decide what kind you want to work on or pursue. The type of love you desire might be unconditional, passionate, camaraderie, or nurturing.

When you think of the unconditional love in your life, ponder what characteristics make up these relationships. If you have ever gotten into a heated argument with a family member one night then greeted them in the morning as if nothing happened, you are familiar with unconditional devotion. It involves being forgiving, taking the high road, and realizing that you would rather see the other person happy than be right.

Passionate love could be allowing yourself to cultivate activities you are zealous about. Perhaps you have a passion for cooking, and making dinner for friends and family is your way of expressing this kind of love.

Camaraderie involves an exchange that is enriching and builds each other up. Simply asking a friend how they are doing can build companionship.

Finally, there is nurturing, which is focused on growing and caring. To nurture and be nurtured improves our lives and makes the journey richer. You can nurture a child, pet, friendship, or an organization that is meaningful to you.

The qualities you value in relationships and the type of affection you want to give and receive is completely up to you. Relationship goals can be achieved in many ways, like signing up for a dating app. While you may be skeptical, being vulnerable and putting yourself out there may lead to finding the love of your life. You might reach out to old friends and discover the chapter you thought was over is actually wide open again.

Setting up a weekly lunch date with your mom is another important way to show love. Our parents are not here forever, and taking the time to get to know details about their life is priceless. Even spending more time with your pet can fill you with warmth. Pets look at us like we are celebrities, and all they want is a tummy scratch, treat, and to play, so show them as much affection as possible.

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When you invest time in people and love, you will feel more confident and connected in life.

4. Tap Into Your Purpose by Leaving Your Mark

Another key to achieving balance in life is having a purpose or a sense of intention. Having a sense of purpose is key to establishing sturdy pillars of life. This does not just mean attaining a specific career or financial goal—it can be having an idea of the type of mark you want to leave on the world.

This aspect of purpose comes in micro and macro levels. On a small scale, you might find that your purpose is to treat people with kindness or be a team player. On a larger level, your purpose could be living out your ideal vocation, whether it means being a teacher, parent, writer, or entrepreneur. You may vow to do one selfless act every day or strive to be the first person in the family to own their own business.

Considering how you want your friends and family to remember you is a vital aspect of what purpose means. Maybe you want to be known as someone who always has a smile on their face or as the go-to person people count on. If so, this means your life purpose is bringing cheer to people and being a giving friend.

The beauty of having a purpose is that it can shift. The goal you are focusing on now might be completely different from your goal in five years. Perhaps your current purpose is getting your dream job and buying your parents a new home. Later in life, your purpose might be volunteering once retired.

No matter what, when you have the motivation to get out of bed every day, it is easier to feel stable and maintain a clear direction in life.

5. Find Your Enthusiasm

Life can become mundane if we do not have activities or hobbies that spark enthusiasm within us. Try picturing a vintage car versus a new, shiny one. Some people love the charm and history of the old one, while others appreciate the high-tech aspects of the new one.

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Both of these people have an enthusiasm for life, just different perspectives. So, now is the time to figure out what excites your spirit. Enthusiasm is an important pillar of life.

Are you someone who cherishes memories and creates detailed scrapbooks for your family? Or are you a cheerleader for people and work to help others achieve their dreams? By journaling and discovering what others admire about you, you begin to see what is possible and define the direction and story of your life.

While not everything we experience is exciting, it is invigorating to feel a sense of personal growth. Even arriving at a place where you no longer feel it necessary to live up to someone else’s standards is a big leap.

As you mature, you experience the wear and tear of life, but throughout it all, you can focus your enthusiasm on different activities and hobbies. When you are going through a difficult time or feeling uneasy, putting energy into spirituality or passions will make you feel more calm and centered.

Final Thoughts

The pillars of life allow us to achieve balance by giving us anchors to grasp when the waves of life rock the boat. These pillars can be continually developed and strengthened. A table won’t function properly when one leg is three feet tall while the others are six. The goal is to create sturdy pillars and a solid foundation.

Also, pillars evolve as our circumstances do. You can value the vibrancy of new pillars while respecting the older ones. Keep in mind that you are on a unique journey, so your pillars might look different than your best friend’s.

Remember that we are all supporting each other. As you strive to construct your pillars, learn from people who have built theirs. It may take a lifetime to perfect your pillars, but the act of creating a path you desire will give you newfound clarity and confidence.

More Tips to Improve Your Pillars of Life

Featured photo credit: Patrick Schneider via unsplash.com

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Nancy Solari

Nancy Solari is an accomplished CEO, life coach, and motivational speaker.

How to Commit to Self-Development for Continuous Growth How to Find Joy in Life During Difficult Times How the 5 Pillars of Life Help You Achieve Balance in Life

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Last Updated on November 27, 2020

15 Ways to Live a Fuller and Happier Life

15 Ways to Live a Fuller and Happier Life

You want to learn how to live a fuller happier life, and that is amazing! Happiness is entirely within your control; you just have to release the idea that you can find happiness from external sources. You create happiness for yourself by changing your attitude towards your life and improving your mindset.

I have split this list into three sections: Let Go, Discover, and Take Action. We cover all the things you need to let go of to life a fuller life, the parts of you that you need to discover, and the actions that you need to take in order to live your best life.

Let Go

Learning to let go of things that no longer serve you is imperative on your path to a happier life.

1. Let Go of Perfection

Nothing slows down happiness and growth faster than the relentless pursuit of perfection. It stops you in your tracks, frozen with the endless edits, tinkers, and changes to create your idea of perfection.

You will never be happy if you are constantly in the pursuit of perfection, because perfection is unattainable. You can perceive something as perfect, but if you constantly search for perfection, you will only ever find more flaws. You are coming from a headspace that leads you to believe it isn’t good enough, and that negative headspace can’t be filled with more tinkering and changing; it can only be filled with love and acceptance.

Let go of trying to do everything perfectly. Do everything imperfectly, and breathe through that nagging thought that it isn’t perfect. You’ll be surprised by how much stress is left behind.

2. Let Go of the Idea That You Know Everything

As we become teenagers and adults, we develop this mindset that we know everything and to not know something is to be weak and vulnerable. Let go of this idea and start questioning everything you think you know.

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The concept that you know everything and that you are always right is a closed mindset. You can’t learn, grow, and change if you aren’t open to new ideas and ways of thinking. Practice saying things like: “I did not know that,” “What do you think about this?” and “Is this true, or is this something I have just known my whole life?” Question your reality because it might be just repeated, old, and outdated ideals.

3. Let Go of Your Ego

Your ego is a wonderful tool at times, but when your ego gets too bossy, it becomes a problem. What is the ego? The ego is your idea of self[1]. The ego makes you act for appearances instead of principles.

When you’re performing for imaginary people’s imaginary expectations for you, you can only lose because you are creating the expectations and making them unrealistic. It is a constant practice to let go of the ego. Practice gratitude and letting go of those all-consuming thoughts.

4. Let Go of Constant Comparison

If you really want to learn how to live a fuller happier life, you have to stop comparing yourself to other people. Comparing yourself to others is futile because you aren’t the same. You haven’t walked in their shoes, and you don’t have their resources or skill set. You are different, and focusing on comparing yourself to them will only bring negative results.

Comparison ultimately results in resentment and deprives you of the joy in your life because, instead of focusing on all that you have, you focus on how you aren’t enough. Be inspired by other people and use it to propel your goals forward, but keep your eyes on your own unique life.

5. Let Go of Focusing on Negative Situations

I hate the phrase “think positive,” but it is misunderstood. It doesn’t mean ignore your problems and feelings; it means get creative. Find another solution. Think outside of the box! It is so easy to focus on the bad that is happening to you, but try not to focus on all the lack; practice gratitude and focus on all that you have.

Redirect your attention to potential solutions to your problems. Reach out for help if you need it. You can control how you perceive and handle situations. For example: Life is hard, and you are down, and you can’t stop feeling sad even though you are doing your best to avoid it and change your mindset. Try a new approach. Sit with your feelings, feel them fully, and face them so they can pass. Don’t focus on the negatives out of your control. Focus on the positive, the things to be grateful for, and all that you have.

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Discover

Life is full of lessons and surprises that are constantly waiting to be discovered. However, the most important discoveries are found inside of you.

6. Discover Your Values

Who are you? What do you believe in? If you want to learn how to live a fuller happier life, start with working out who you really are, what you truly believe in, and what your values are. Once you know who you are, what you value, and who you want to be, live your life in this way, despite what others may think of your choices.

7. Discover Self-Compassion

Life is hard, confusing, and messy. You aren’t a God. You are just a person trying to figure it out like the rest of us. Give yourself a break; you don’t have to have it all figured out. Always speak to yourself with kindness, even after you have done something wrong. Learn from your mistakes and be kind to yourself, and you will be so much happier. After all, it’s hard to be happy when there is someone living in your head constantly being mean to you.

8. Discover How to Live With No Regrets

When I was 14, I saw this motivational quote printed on wallpaper: “When you want to do something, do it right away. Do it when you can. It’s the only way to live a life without regrets.” I still remember it because it is so true.

Do you want to wake up at 70 or 80 or 100 and realize that you have regrets? Money comes around, time does not. If you want to do something, go do it. Now. Live your life right now, because you never know when you will wake up regretting all the things you never did.

9. Discover Balance

If you want to learn how to live a fuller happier life, you need to find balance. Do more things you love! Have more fun!

Spend some time finding balance in areas that you are lacking. For example, a workaholic will most likely need to have adventure. Someone who is constantly stressed may need to incorporate yoga or meditation into their routine. Find a way to stabilize your actions and emotions to live happier.

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10. Discover Your Self-Expression

If you learn how to express yourself emotionally and creatively, you will find a new world of happiness and fulfillment. Embrace your inner artist. Speak your truth, and say how you truly feel, fearlessly.

Part of living authentically is expressing who you are, even if people don’t like it. Live your truth, and find your tribe. You are wonderful and important, and you will find happiness in expressing who you really are.

Take Action

Taking action in life is only helpful if your actions help you stay true to your authentic self. Practice the actions below to learn how to live a fuller happier life.

11. Leave Your Comfort Zone

To live your fullest life, it means you have to leave your comfort zone and achieve your goals. Everything you want is on the other side of your comfort zone. Fear and happiness may seem like opposites, but they aren’t. Fear is just the step to help you up to the cookie jar that is happiness. To get there, you must be brave enough to get on the step and risk falling off.

12. Take One Day at a Time

Focus on living your best day each day. Don’t focus on how bad the past has been or what the future could be. Every day is a new day, and your past mistakes were lessons for you to apply today so you don’t repeat your mistakes. Focus on how you can improve today to be happy, fulfilled, and hit your goals in the future.

13. Surround Yourself With People Who Lift You up

You are only as happy as your environment. If you are surrounded by negative people who don’t believe in you and try and keep you down, your ability to be happy and fulfilled will be capped. If there are people in your life trying to sabotage your happiness, you’ll have a difficult time overcoming those negative emotions.

You are a combination of the five people you hang out with most, so make sure they are on your team and will to spread positivity wherever they go. Don’t be afraid to change up your people; you are doing them a favor, as well.

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14. Do What Makes You Happy

Not everyone is going to understand what you are doing, and people will try and tell you that you are crazy and hold you back. However, if it makes you happy and fulfilled, do it anyway. Prove them wrong.

Innovators have to push the boundaries of what is possible, and this applies to your life. You are an innovator, too. Your project is your life, and you have to be willing to continue down your path despite the negative voices that may come your way.

15. Take Personal Responsibility

It’s time to take action and take personal responsibility for your life. Bad things happen to people every day, and you have to stop blaming other people and situations for your bad experiences. This is a simple but vital mindset shift because it takes control back.

If you are responsible for everything that happens to you and you do, then you can change it. Take responsibility for each thing that happens to you, and use the knowledge you gain to prevent the same mistakes in the future. However (and this is key), don’t use it to blame and torture yourself about how bad a person you are. Use it to learn and apply to the future, without self-shaming. None!

Final Thoughts

Learning how to live a fuller happier life is completely in your control. It is all about attitude, mindset, and actions taken to create the life you want. It can be scary and overwhelming, but if you take small steps and practice gratitude, you can find your happiness. You deserve to be happy, so choose it.

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Featured photo credit: Antonino Visalli via unsplash.com

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