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How ENFP Relationships Work Out With Each Meyers Briggs Type

How ENFP Relationships Work Out With Each Meyers Briggs Type

When it comes to dating and relationships, we all want to find someone who is our ‘best match’ — someone who ticks most of the compatibility boxes, understands our quirk’s and complements our personality. One way you can look into the indicators of compatibility is the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator Test.

In this article, we will look into one of the personality types — ENFP’s relationships lives. Who are ENFP compatible with and how should they take care of their relationships?

Myers-Briggs Personality Types and relationships

The Myers-Briggs Personality Types is an assessment that is based on the assumption that there are different attitudes and functions of consciousness.[1] The attitudes determine the direction in which your conscious interests and energies flow. The phenomenon is based on Jung’s classification of personalities.

Jung’s classification of personalities is based on two personality attitudes, (introversion and extroversion) and four functions that are divided into irrational functions (intuition and feeling) and rational functions (Judging and perceiving functions).

The Myers-Briggs Personality Types helps you to evaluate and understand yourself: who you are, how you interact with other people, how you make decisions and your psychological preferences when it comes to dating.[2]

For instance, you can use the Myers-Briggs Personality types to help you determine what the common thread is among your exes and crushes and consequently discover the type of partner with whom you should be spending your life.

ENFP personality type: Extrovert, intuition, feeling and perception

ENFPs account for 8% of the world’s population. The ENFPs are independent, energetic and compassionate. They make charming partners, and they readily express their reliability and devotion. They genuinely care for their partners and they are very sensitive to their partners’ needs.[3]

Famous ENFPs include:

  • Sandra Bullock
  • Oscar Wilde
  • Walt Disney
  • Keira Knightley
  • Daniel Radcliffe
  • Fidel Castro
  • Mark Twain
  • Salman Rushdle
  • Ellen Degeneres
  • Jeniffer Anniston
  • Sharon Stone

Here’re some of the major traits of ENFP:

1. They are unpredictable.

ENFPs follow their inspiration wherever it leads.[4] They enjoy indulging in their imaginative and spirited side. An ENFP wants to explore every possible idea that comes to their mind.

There is nothing an ENFP hates more than the feeling of being tied down, and they will not put their personal growth on the back burner.

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An ideal partner for an ENFP will engage them in new thoughts and ideas and expose them to scenarios that challenge them. Otherwise, the ENFP will start wondering if they should not be spending time with someone else.

2. They are good at communication.

ENFP individuals are characterized by their incredible ability to communicate. They are responsive to their partners’ emotions and constructively resolve issues since they have a good understanding of the people around them.

3. They hate conflict

For the ENFP, the process of solving conflict concerns making everyone happy.[5]

Even in a tough situation, ENFPs look beyond the obvious and see various possibilities. They are profoundly empathetic and they find it difficult to punish other people.

How ENFP relationships work out with each Meyer’s Briggs Type

A good fit for an ENFP is a partner who is capable of going with the flow. Rigidity and strictness in the schedule of an ENFP partner will cause the relationship to fail.

An ENFP partner should be flexible enough to travel and try new hobbies for the relationship to survive. The good thing is that since ENFPs love to make their partners happy, a partner’s efforts and sacrifices will be reciprocated.

Being dumped by an ENFP is hard on some of the other personality types. They wonder if they will ever find someone that wonderful again. On the contrary, when ENFPs are rejected, they recover quickly and concentrate on new prospects. Oh, and they rebound quickly.

Excellent partners for the ENFPs

The most compatible personality types for ENFP are INTJ and INFJ.

When it comes to dating and marriage, people are attracted to a partner who is strong in areas that they are weak. As such, ENFPs form very successful relationships with the INTJs and INFJs.

ENFPs and INTJs relationships:

ENFPs and INTJs will hit it off and experience a natural spark because they both thrive in the world of ideas.[6]

For the ENFP, life is full of possibility and excitement, and they will have a contagious enthusiasm that will draw the INTJ in.

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The ENFP will also open up the INTJ’s mind to many possibilities that they may not have been previously aware of while the INTJs will harness the ideas and insights of ENFPs and give them clarity and focus to bring them to life.

Since INTJs are reserved and introverted, they will find in the playful, and genuinely open-minded ENFPs comforting and delightful partners.

ENFPs and INFJs relationships:

ENFPs and INFJs also form very successful relationships. Experts say that both ENFPs and INFJs are highly intuitive individuals and that even though they have some fundamental differences, they both have pieces that each desires.[7]

While on the one hand, the INFJs want to be understood and to be helped to come out of their shell, the ENFPs genuinely love meeting the needs of their partners. This creates a great balance between the two partners.

Further, even though the ENFPs are extroverted, the INFJs are more introspective, and they know how to help the ENFPs with their emotional growth. In fact, the ENFPs are the only partners that are persistent enough that they will get to really know an INFJ.

Neither ENFPs nor INFJs enjoy conflict. So when they disagree on something, the efforts to come to a solution will rarely turn into a fight.

Other Myers-Briggs Personality Types that form excellent relationships with the ENFPs include:

ESFJ: The ESFJs can get extremely pessimistic and discouraged under certain circumstances. As such, the ENFPs prove to be very understanding and supportive of them.

ENFJ: ENFJs are profoundly perceptive and love to discuss meaningful topics. Just like ENFPs, they have excellent communication skills and therefore, ENFPs certainly enjoy their company.

INTP: INTPs are thinkers, and they are into ideas and theories. Their relationships with the ENFPs work very well because the ENFPs have a natural ability for understanding people.

Reasonably good partners for the ENFPs

ENFPs and INFPs are equally passionate and yet considerably different because of how they perceive the world around them.

ENFPs and INFPs relationships:

ENFPs love to talk and can indulge in talking endlessly. INFPs, on the other hand, are calm and reserved and they like to listen. This makes the two personality types perfect for each other.

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ENFPs are social animals. They love to make the people around them happy. The INFPs tend to stay behind the scenes. They are creative and artistic, and they, therefore, draw the ENFPs to them.

Both personalities rely on intuition, and they can have deep discussions. The ENFPs and INFPs can communicate their feelings through unconventional ways, which will keep their spark alive.

Other Myers-Briggs Personality Types that can build a reasonably healthy r elationship with the ENFP include:

ENTP: ENTPs are self-confident and can socialize with all people with uncompromising charm. They therefore make good partners with the ENFPs, who are social butterflies.

ENTJ: The ENTJs are logical in their approach and love planning. They bring structure to the lives of the ENFPs.

ISFP: The ISFPs are action oriented and believe in doing rather than thinking. They are a good fit for ENFPs since they can help them to achieve their goals.

ESFP: Just like the ENFPs, the ESFPs love to experience new things and are often impulsive. As a result, they can get along with ENFPs.

Of all the ENFPs, females are more than the males, in the ratio of 2:1

Unlikely partners for the ENFPs

The Myers-Briggs Personality Types that would find it difficult to build any meaningful relationship with the ENFPs include ISTJs. The ISTJ-ENFP relationship has zero similarities and four differences.[8]

ENFPs and ISTJs relationships:

The ENFPs may feel that the ISTJs are too quiet and find communicating with them difficult. On the other hand, ISTJs may find the ENFPs too loud. In a social situation, ISTJs may also feel neglected and unheard by ENFPs.

The ISTJs may prefer to have some quiet time at home while the ENFPs will enjoy heading out for social activities and other highly stimulating activities. This difference in preference would be a bone of contention in the relationship.

The ENFPs may also find the ISTJs too controlling at times while the ISTJ will find the ENFP lack of planning and scheduling irritating.

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In addition, the ISTJs are more focused on the present while the ENFPs concentrate on the future. This may deprive a couple of shared goals and a common future to look forward to. Eventually, the couple will not have any chemistry.

Other personality types that would find it hard to maintain a relationship with ENFPs include:[9]

ISTP: ISTPs are analytical, practical and realistic. They are also not good at handling emotions. The ENFPs might not find them appealing at all.

ESTP: ESTPs are realists, and they are not enthusiastic on the emotional side. They are therefore unlikely to be compatible with the ENFPs.

ESTJ: ESTJs have strong opinions, and they lack spontaneity. They are inflexible and may come off as controlling. They love traditions and routines and want to conduct the relationship the old-fashioned way. As a result, they do not get along with the ENFPs.

ISFJ: ISFJs are not very future oriented. Indeed, they would rather rely on past experiences. This is a total contradiction to the ENFPs.

Final thoughts

Having said all this, you should bear in mind that Myers-Briggs Types is just an instrument that gives you more information on people’s innate preferences.

While knowing your own and other people’s preferences is a huge plus when it comes to relationships, nothing is cast on stone. You cannot dismiss a potential partner just because Myers-Briggs said that you are not compatible.

Also, if you do not end up with someone whom you are compatible, you can use the Myers and Briggs Relationship Type to spark a debate about how you can meet halfway to build a more healthy relationship.

Again, despite what the Myers-Briggs types indicates, ENFPs can enjoy satisfying relationships with any personality type if both of the partners are committed to personal growth and communicating effectively.

Remember that there is more to relationships than simply meeting ‘the one’. Though you may have great chemistry and click to the moon and back, they are never a ‘meet the right one and ride off into the sunset’ type scenario. They take work in order to last and thrive.

The Myers-Briggs type indicators are only indicators and aren’t a silver bullet to long lasting relationship bliss.

Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

Reference

More by this author

Randy Skilton

Randy is an educator in the areas of relationships and self-help.

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Last Updated on April 6, 2020

10 Powerful Ways to Influence People Positively

10 Powerful Ways to Influence People Positively

Most discussions on positively influencing others eventually touch on Dale Carnegie’s seminal work, How to Win Friends and Influence People. Written more than 83 years ago, the book touches on a core component of human interaction, building strong relationships. It is no wonder why.

Everything that we do hinges on our ability to connect with others and formulate deep relationships. You cannot sell a house, buy a house, advance in most careers, sell a product, pitch a story, teach a course, etc. without building healthy relationships. Managers get the best results from their teams, not through brute force, but to careful appeals to their sensibilities, occasional withdrawals from the reservoir of respect they’ve built. Using these tactics, they can influence others to excellence, to productivity, and to success.

Carnegie’s book is great. Of course, there are other resources too. Most of us have someone in our lives who positively influences us. The truth is positively influencing people is about centering the humanity of others. Chances are, you know someone who is really good at making others feel like stars. They can get you to do things that the average person cannot. Where the requests of others sound like fingernails on a chalkboard, the request from this special person sounds like music to your ears. You’re delighted to not only listen but also to oblige.

So how to influence people in a positive way? Read on for tips.

1. Be Authentic

To influence people in a positive way, be authentic. Rather than being a carbon copy of someone else’s version of authenticity, uncover what it is that makes you unique.

Discover your unique take on an issue and then live up to and honor that. Once of the reasons social media influencers are so powerful is that they have carved out a niche for themselves or taken a common issue and approached it from a novel or uncommon way. People instinctually appreciate people whose public persona matches their private values.

Contradictions bother us because we crave stability. When someone professes to be one way, but lives contrary to that profession, it signals that they are confused or untrustworthy and thereby, inauthentic. Neither of these combinations bode well for positively influencing others.

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2. Listen

Growing up, my father would tell me to listen to what others said. He told me if I listened carefully, I would know all I needed to know about a person’s character, desires and needs.

To positively influence others, you must listen to what is spoken and what is left unsaid. Therein lies the explanation for what people need in order to feel validated, supported and seen. If a person feels they are invisible, and unseen by their superiors, they are less likely to be positively influenced by that person.

Listening meets a person’s primary need of validation and acceptance.

Take a look at this guide on how to be a better listener: How to Practice Active Listening (A Step-By-Step Guide)

3. Become an Expert

Most people are predisposed to listen to, if not respect, authority. If you want to positively influence others, become an authority in the area in which you seek to lead others. Research and read everything you can about the given topic, and then look for opportunities to put your education into practice.

You can argue over opinions. You cannot argue, or it is unwise to argue, over facts and experts come with facts.

4. Lead with Story

From years of working in the public relations space, I know that personal narratives, testimonials and impact stories are incredibly powerful. But I never cease to be amazed with how effective a well-timed and told story can be.

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If you want to influence people, learn to tell stories. Your stories should be related to the issue or concept you are discussing. They should be an analogy or metaphor that explains your topic in ordinary terms and in vivid detail. To learn more about how to tell powerful stories, and the ethics of storytelling, take a look at this article: How To Tell An Interesting Story In 4 Simple Steps

5. Lead by Example

It is incredibly inspiring to watch passionate, talented people at work or play. One of the reasons a person who is not an athlete can be in awe of athletic prowess is because human nature appreciates the extraordinary. When we watch the Olympics, Olympic trials, gymnastic competitions, ice skating, and other competitive sports, we can recognize the effort of people who day in and day out give their all. C

ase in point: Simone Biles. The gymnast extraordinaire won her 6TH all-around title at the U.S. Gymnastics Championships after doing a triple double. She was the first woman to do so. Watching her gave me chills. Even non-gymnasts and non-competitive athletes can appreciate the talent required to pull off such a remarkable feat.

We celebrate remarkable accomplishments and believe that their example is proof that we too can accomplish something great, even if it isn’t qualifying for the Olympics. To influence people in a positive way, we must lead by example, lead with intention and execute with excellence.

6. Catch People Doing Good

A powerful way to influence people in a positive way is to catch people doing good. Instead of looking for problems, look for successes. Look for often overlooked, but critically important things that your peers, subordinates and managers do that make the work more effective and more enjoyable.

Once you catch people doing good, name and notice their contributions.

7. Be Effusive with Praise

It did not take me long to notice a remarkable trait of a former boss. He not only began and ended meetings with praise, but he peppered praise throughout the entire meeting. He found a way to celebrate the unique attributes and skills of his team members. He was able to quickly and accurately assess what people were doing well and then let them and their colleagues know.

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Meetings were not just an occasion to go through a “To Do” list, they were opportunities to celebrate accomplishments, no matter how small they are.

8. Be Kind Rather Than Right

I am going to level with you; this one is tough. It is easy to get caught up in a cycle of proving oneself. For people who lack confidence, or people who prioritize the opinions of others, being right is important. The validation that comes with being perceived as “right” feeds one’s ego. But in the quest to be “right,” we can hurt other people. Once we’ve hurt someone by being unkind, it is much harder to get them to listen to what we’re trying to influence them to do.

The antidote to influencing others via bullying is to prioritize kindness above rightness. You can be kind and still stand firm in your position. For instance, many people think that they need others to validate their experience. If a person does not see the situation you experienced in the way you see it, you get upset. But your experience is your experience.

If you and your friends go out to eat and you get food poisoning, you do not need your friends to agree that the food served at the restaurant was problematic for you. Your own experience of getting food poisoning is all the validation you need. Therefore, taking time to be right is essentially wasted and, if you were unkind in seeking validation for your food-poison experience, now you’ve really lost points.

9. Understand a Person’s Logical, Emotional and Cooperative Needs

The Center for Creative Leadership has argued that the best way to influence others is to appeal to their logical, emotional and cooperative needs. Their logical need is their rational and educational need. Their emotional need is the information that touches them in a deeply personal manner. The cooperative need is understanding the level of cooperation various individuals need and then appropriately offering it.

The trick with this system is to understand that different people need different things. For some people, a strong emotional appeal will outweigh logical explanations. For others, having an opportunity to collaborate will override emotional connection.

If you know your audience, you will know what they need in order to be positively influenced. If you have limited information about the people whom you are attempting to influence, you will be ineffective.

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10. Understand Your Lane

If you want to positively influence others, operate from your sphere of influence. Operate from your place of expertise. Leave everything else to others. Gone are the days when being a jack of all trades is celebrated.

Most people appreciate brands that understand their target audience and then deliver on what that audience wants. When you focus on what you are uniquely gifted and qualified to do, and then offer that gift to the people who need it, you are likely more effective. This effectiveness is attractive.

You cannot positively influence others if you are more preoccupied by what others do well versus what you do well.

Final Thoughts

Influencing people is about centering your humanity. If you want to influence others positively, focus on the way you communicate and improve the relationship with yourself first.

It’s hard to influence others if you’re still trying to figure out how to communicate with yourself.

More Tips About Making Influence

Featured photo credit: Wonderlane via unsplash.com

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