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Published on September 7, 2018

How ENFP Relationships Work Out With Each Meyers Briggs Type

How ENFP Relationships Work Out With Each Meyers Briggs Type

When it comes to dating and relationships, we all want to find someone who is our ‘best match’ — someone who ticks most of the compatibility boxes, understands our quirk’s and complements our personality. One way you can look into the indicators of compatibility is the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator Test.

In this article, we will look into one of the personality types — ENFP’s relationships lives. Who are ENFP compatible with and how should they take care of their relationships?

Myers-Briggs Personality Types and relationships

The Myers-Briggs Personality Types is an assessment that is based on the assumption that there are different attitudes and functions of consciousness.[1] The attitudes determine the direction in which your conscious interests and energies flow. The phenomenon is based on Jung’s classification of personalities.

Jung’s classification of personalities is based on two personality attitudes, (introversion and extroversion) and four functions that are divided into irrational functions (intuition and feeling) and rational functions (Judging and perceiving functions).

The Myers-Briggs Personality Types helps you to evaluate and understand yourself: who you are, how you interact with other people, how you make decisions and your psychological preferences when it comes to dating.[2]

For instance, you can use the Myers-Briggs Personality types to help you determine what the common thread is among your exes and crushes and consequently discover the type of partner with whom you should be spending your life.

ENFP personality type: Extrovert, intuition, feeling and perception

ENFPs account for 8% of the world’s population. The ENFPs are independent, energetic and compassionate. They make charming partners, and they readily express their reliability and devotion. They genuinely care for their partners and they are very sensitive to their partners’ needs.[3]

Famous ENFPs include:

  • Sandra Bullock
  • Oscar Wilde
  • Walt Disney
  • Keira Knightley
  • Daniel Radcliffe
  • Fidel Castro
  • Mark Twain
  • Salman Rushdle
  • Ellen Degeneres
  • Jeniffer Anniston
  • Sharon Stone

Here’re some of the major traits of ENFP:

1. They are unpredictable.

ENFPs follow their inspiration wherever it leads.[4] They enjoy indulging in their imaginative and spirited side. An ENFP wants to explore every possible idea that comes to their mind.

There is nothing an ENFP hates more than the feeling of being tied down, and they will not put their personal growth on the back burner.

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An ideal partner for an ENFP will engage them in new thoughts and ideas and expose them to scenarios that challenge them. Otherwise, the ENFP will start wondering if they should not be spending time with someone else.

2. They are good at communication.

ENFP individuals are characterized by their incredible ability to communicate. They are responsive to their partners’ emotions and constructively resolve issues since they have a good understanding of the people around them.

3. They hate conflict

For the ENFP, the process of solving conflict concerns making everyone happy.[5]

Even in a tough situation, ENFPs look beyond the obvious and see various possibilities. They are profoundly empathetic and they find it difficult to punish other people.

How ENFP relationships work out with each Meyer’s Briggs Type

A good fit for an ENFP is a partner who is capable of going with the flow. Rigidity and strictness in the schedule of an ENFP partner will cause the relationship to fail.

An ENFP partner should be flexible enough to travel and try new hobbies for the relationship to survive. The good thing is that since ENFPs love to make their partners happy, a partner’s efforts and sacrifices will be reciprocated.

Being dumped by an ENFP is hard on some of the other personality types. They wonder if they will ever find someone that wonderful again. On the contrary, when ENFPs are rejected, they recover quickly and concentrate on new prospects. Oh, and they rebound quickly.

Excellent partners for the ENFPs

The most compatible personality types for ENFP are INTJ and INFJ.

When it comes to dating and marriage, people are attracted to a partner who is strong in areas that they are weak. As such, ENFPs form very successful relationships with the INTJs and INFJs.

ENFPs and INTJs relationships:

ENFPs and INTJs will hit it off and experience a natural spark because they both thrive in the world of ideas.[6]

For the ENFP, life is full of possibility and excitement, and they will have a contagious enthusiasm that will draw the INTJ in.

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The ENFP will also open up the INTJ’s mind to many possibilities that they may not have been previously aware of while the INTJs will harness the ideas and insights of ENFPs and give them clarity and focus to bring them to life.

Since INTJs are reserved and introverted, they will find in the playful, and genuinely open-minded ENFPs comforting and delightful partners.

ENFPs and INFJs relationships:

ENFPs and INFJs also form very successful relationships. Experts say that both ENFPs and INFJs are highly intuitive individuals and that even though they have some fundamental differences, they both have pieces that each desires.[7]

While on the one hand, the INFJs want to be understood and to be helped to come out of their shell, the ENFPs genuinely love meeting the needs of their partners. This creates a great balance between the two partners.

Further, even though the ENFPs are extroverted, the INFJs are more introspective, and they know how to help the ENFPs with their emotional growth. In fact, the ENFPs are the only partners that are persistent enough that they will get to really know an INFJ.

Neither ENFPs nor INFJs enjoy conflict. So when they disagree on something, the efforts to come to a solution will rarely turn into a fight.

Other Myers-Briggs Personality Types that form excellent relationships with the ENFPs include:

ESFJ: The ESFJs can get extremely pessimistic and discouraged under certain circumstances. As such, the ENFPs prove to be very understanding and supportive of them.

ENFJ: ENFJs are profoundly perceptive and love to discuss meaningful topics. Just like ENFPs, they have excellent communication skills and therefore, ENFPs certainly enjoy their company.

INTP: INTPs are thinkers, and they are into ideas and theories. Their relationships with the ENFPs work very well because the ENFPs have a natural ability for understanding people.

Reasonably good partners for the ENFPs

ENFPs and INFPs are equally passionate and yet considerably different because of how they perceive the world around them.

ENFPs and INFPs relationships:

ENFPs love to talk and can indulge in talking endlessly. INFPs, on the other hand, are calm and reserved and they like to listen. This makes the two personality types perfect for each other.

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ENFPs are social animals. They love to make the people around them happy. The INFPs tend to stay behind the scenes. They are creative and artistic, and they, therefore, draw the ENFPs to them.

Both personalities rely on intuition, and they can have deep discussions. The ENFPs and INFPs can communicate their feelings through unconventional ways, which will keep their spark alive.

Other Myers-Briggs Personality Types that can build a reasonably healthy r elationship with the ENFP include:

ENTP: ENTPs are self-confident and can socialize with all people with uncompromising charm. They therefore make good partners with the ENFPs, who are social butterflies.

ENTJ: The ENTJs are logical in their approach and love planning. They bring structure to the lives of the ENFPs.

ISFP: The ISFPs are action oriented and believe in doing rather than thinking. They are a good fit for ENFPs since they can help them to achieve their goals.

ESFP: Just like the ENFPs, the ESFPs love to experience new things and are often impulsive. As a result, they can get along with ENFPs.

Of all the ENFPs, females are more than the males, in the ratio of 2:1

Unlikely partners for the ENFPs

The Myers-Briggs Personality Types that would find it difficult to build any meaningful relationship with the ENFPs include ISTJs. The ISTJ-ENFP relationship has zero similarities and four differences.[8]

ENFPs and ISTJs relationships:

The ENFPs may feel that the ISTJs are too quiet and find communicating with them difficult. On the other hand, ISTJs may find the ENFPs too loud. In a social situation, ISTJs may also feel neglected and unheard by ENFPs.

The ISTJs may prefer to have some quiet time at home while the ENFPs will enjoy heading out for social activities and other highly stimulating activities. This difference in preference would be a bone of contention in the relationship.

The ENFPs may also find the ISTJs too controlling at times while the ISTJ will find the ENFP lack of planning and scheduling irritating.

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In addition, the ISTJs are more focused on the present while the ENFPs concentrate on the future. This may deprive a couple of shared goals and a common future to look forward to. Eventually, the couple will not have any chemistry.

Other personality types that would find it hard to maintain a relationship with ENFPs include:[9]

ISTP: ISTPs are analytical, practical and realistic. They are also not good at handling emotions. The ENFPs might not find them appealing at all.

ESTP: ESTPs are realists, and they are not enthusiastic on the emotional side. They are therefore unlikely to be compatible with the ENFPs.

ESTJ: ESTJs have strong opinions, and they lack spontaneity. They are inflexible and may come off as controlling. They love traditions and routines and want to conduct the relationship the old-fashioned way. As a result, they do not get along with the ENFPs.

ISFJ: ISFJs are not very future oriented. Indeed, they would rather rely on past experiences. This is a total contradiction to the ENFPs.

Final thoughts

Having said all this, you should bear in mind that Myers-Briggs Types is just an instrument that gives you more information on people’s innate preferences.

While knowing your own and other people’s preferences is a huge plus when it comes to relationships, nothing is cast on stone. You cannot dismiss a potential partner just because Myers-Briggs said that you are not compatible.

Also, if you do not end up with someone whom you are compatible, you can use the Myers and Briggs Relationship Type to spark a debate about how you can meet halfway to build a more healthy relationship.

Again, despite what the Myers-Briggs types indicates, ENFPs can enjoy satisfying relationships with any personality type if both of the partners are committed to personal growth and communicating effectively.

Remember that there is more to relationships than simply meeting ‘the one’. Though you may have great chemistry and click to the moon and back, they are never a ‘meet the right one and ride off into the sunset’ type scenario. They take work in order to last and thrive.

The Myers-Briggs type indicators are only indicators and aren’t a silver bullet to long lasting relationship bliss.

Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

Reference

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Randy Skilton

Randy is an educator in the areas of relationships and self-help.

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Last Updated on May 21, 2019

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

For all our social media bravado, we live in a society where communication is seen less as an art, and more as a perfunctory exercise. We spend so much time with people, yet we struggle with how to meaningfully communicate.

If you believe you have mastered effective communication, scan the list below and see whether you can see yourself in any of the examples:

Example 1

You are uncomfortable with a person’s actions or comments, and rather than telling the individual immediately, you sidestep the issue and attempt to move on as though the offending behavior or comment never happened.

You move on with the relationship and develop a pattern of not addressing challenging situations. Before long, the person with whom you are in relationship will say or do something that pushes you over the top and predictably, you explode or withdraw completely from the relationship.

In this example, hard-to-speak truths become never- expressed truths that turn into resentment and anger.

Example 2

You communicate from the head and without emotion. While what you communicate makes perfect sense to you, it comes across as cold because it lacks emotion.

People do not understand what motivates you to say what you say, and without sharing your feelings and emotions, others experience you as rude, cold or aggressive.

You will know this is a problem if people shy away from you, ignore your contributions in meetings or tell you your words hurt. You can also know you struggle in this area if you find yourself constantly apologizing for things you have said.

Example 3

You have an issue with one person, but you communicate your problem to an entirely different person.

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The person in whom you confide lacks the authority to resolve the matter troubling you, and while you have vented and expressed frustration, the underlying challenge is unresolved.

Example 4

You grew up in a family with destructive communication habits and those habits play out in your current relationships.

Because you have never stopped to ask why you communicate the way you do and whether your communication style still works, you may lack understanding of how your words impact others and how to implement positive change.

If you find yourself in any of the situations described above, this article is for you.

Communication can build or decimate worlds and it is important we get it right. Regardless of your professional aspirations or personal goals, you can improve your communication skills if you:

  • Understand your own communication style
  • Tailor your style depending on the needs of the audience
  • Communicate with precision and care
  • Be mindful of your delivery, timing and messenger

1. Understand Your Communication Style

To communicate effectively, you must understand the communication legacy passed down from our parents, grandparents or caregivers. Each of us grew up with spoken and unspoken rules about communication.

In some families, direct communication is practiced and honored. In other families, family members are encouraged to shy away from difficult conversations. Some families appreciate open and frank dialogue and others do not. Other families practice silence about substantive matters, that is, they seldom or rarely broach difficult conversations at all.

Before you can appreciate the nuance required in communication, it helps to know the familial patterns you grew up with.

2. Learn Others Communication Styles

Communicating effectively requires you to take a step back, assess the intended recipient of your communication and think through how the individual prefers to be communicated with. Once you know this, you can tailor your message in a way that increases the likelihood of being heard. This also prevents you from assuming the way you communicate with one group is appropriate or right for all groups or people.

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If you are unsure how to determine the styles of the groups or persons with whom you are interacting, you can always ask them:

“How do you prefer to receive information?”

This approach requires listening, both to what the individuals say as well as what is unspoken. Virgin Group CEO Richard Branson noted that the best communicators are also great listeners.

To communicate effectively from relationship to relationship and situation to situation, you must understand the communication needs of others.

3. Exercise Precision and Care

A recent engagement underscored for me the importance of exercising care when communicating.

On a recent trip to Ohio, I decided to meet up with an old friend to go for a walk. As we strolled through the soccer park, my friend gently announced that he had something to talk about, he was upset with me. His introduction to the problem allowed me to mentally shift gears and prepare for the conversation.

Shortly after introducing the shift in conversation, my friend asked me why I didn’t invite him to the launch party for my business. He lives in Ohio and I live in the D.C. area.

I explained that the event snuck up on me, and I only started planning the invite list three weeks before the event. Due to the last-minute nature of the gathering, I opted to invite people in the DMV area versus my friends from outside the area – I didn’t want to be disrespectful by asking them to travel on such short notice.

I also noted that I didn’t want to be disappointed if he and others declined to come to the event. So I played it safe in terms of inviting people who were local.

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In the moment, I felt the conversation went very well. I also checked in with my friend a few days after our walk, affirmed my appreciation for his willingness to communicate his upset and our ability to work through it.

The way this conversation unfolded exemplified effective communication. My friend approached me with grace and vulnerability. He approached me with a level of curiosity that didn’t put me on my heels — I was able to really listen to what he was saying, apologize for how my decision impacted him and vow that going forward, I would always ask rather than making decisions for him and others.

Our relationship is intact, and I now have information that will help me become a better friend to him and others.

4. Be Mindful of Delivery, Timing and Messenger

Communicating effectively also requires thinking through the delivery of the message one intends to communicate as well as the appropriate time for the discussion.

In an Entrepreneur.com column, VIP Contributor Deep Patel, noted that persons interested in communicating well need to master the art of timing. Patel noted,[1]

“Great comedians, like all great communicators, are able to feel out their audience to determine when to move on to a new topic or when to reiterate an idea.”

Communicating effectively also requires thoughtfulness about the messenger. A person prone to dramatic, angry outbursts should never be called upon to deliver constructive feedback, especially to people whom they do not know. The immediate aftermath of a mass shooting is not the ideal time to talk about the importance of the Second Amendment rights.

Like everyone else, I must work to ensure my communication is layered with precision and care.

It requires precision because words must be carefully tailored to the person with whom you are speaking.

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It requires intentionality because before one communicates, one should think about the audience and what the audience needs in order to hear your message the way you intended it to be communicated.

It requires active listening which is about hearing verbal and nonverbal messages.

Even though we may be right in what we say, how we say it could derail the impact of the message and the other parties’ ability to hear the message.

Communicating with care is also about saying things that the people in our life need to hear and doing so with love.

The Bottom Line

When I left the meeting with my dear friend, I wondered if I was replicating or modeling this level of openness and transparency in the rest of my relationships.

I was intrigued and appreciative. He’d clearly thought about what he wanted to say to me, picked the appropriate time to share his feedback and then delivered it with care. He hit the ball out of the park and I’m hopeful we all do the same.

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Featured photo credit: Kenan Buhic via unsplash.com

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