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5 Fearless Books To Read If You Want To Chase Your Fears Away

5 Fearless Books To Read If You Want To Chase Your Fears Away

Phobias are the most common mental disorder in the U.S, as approximately 10 percent of people in the U.S. experience phobias. Even if you are not bothered by a specific or social phobia, fear haunts us in different ways. It can affect our performance, for instance if we have a fear of public speaking or anxiety during an exam. An intense exposure to fear can even cause mental problems like panic attacks, cold sweats and other symptoms that affect our well being. There is always a way however, to deal with those fears and overcome the demons in our lives. Here is a selection of 5 books that can help you to conquer your inner fears.

Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead by Brené Brown

    Most of the times we see our vulnerability as a weakness, something we fear. Dr. Brené Brown offers an alternative view in Daring Greatly and encourages readers to embrace vulnerability and imperfection, to live wholeheartedly, and to courageously engage in our lives. The book sheds a new light on what it means to engage with our vulnerability, the reason (shame) why we are so afraid of being vulnerable, and how to combat the situation. The book will not fix your insecurities instantly, but it helps readers to realise and relate to their lives in order to move forward.

    Reading duration: 4hrs 32mins

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    Get Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead from Amazon at $13.60

    The Big Leap: Conquer Your Hidden Fear and Take Life to the Next Level by Gay Hendricks

      The Big Leap helps you learn how to jump from mediocrity to excellence. To do that, you have to learn to conquer the fears that are holding you back. Hendricks suggests in the book, that certain fears are fake, mostly because we believe ourselves to be limited.

      In the book, we learn about the four hidden barriers that many of us impose on ourselves that may limit us.  A lot of our negative emotions are self-limiting, including worry, and self-criticism, and these are the hindrance to our future success. Hendricks offers us his key to success “I expand in abundance, success, and love every day and I inspire others around me to do the same.”

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      Reading duration: 3hrs 10mins

      Get The Big Leap: Conquer Your Hidden Fear and Take Life to the Next Level from Amazon at $7.57

      Hardcore Self Help: F**k Anxiety by Robert Duff

        This book is not your regular self-help (if i might say, boring) anxiety relief book. Instead of going on and on with scientific knowledge, Duff delineates the important stuff clearly in a way anyone can understand with or without prior education in psychology. There is lots of swearing and humour, with lots of helpful and actionable information. Even if you do not suffer from anxiety, you will get a good laugh from the book.

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        Reading duration: 59mins

        Get Hardcore Self Help: F**k Anxiety from Amazon at $9.99

        The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook by Edmund J. Bourne

          The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook is a practical book with exercises for readers to follow through, such as breathing techniques and info on herbal remedies to ease generalised anxiety disorder, social anxiety, specific phobias, panic attacks, obsessive-compulsive disorder, and other anxiety-related issues. Aside from the quick and easy fix, the author provides challenging negative self-talk and mistaken beliefs, and imagery and real-life desensitisation to a step-by-step guide to slowly put your life together. If you have anxiety, this book would act as a very good supplement to a professional counsel that can be around with you for anytime.

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          Reading duration: 6hrs 54mins

          Get The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook from Amazon at $19.41

          Calm: Calm the Mind. Change the World by Michael Acton Smith

            Our daily lives are filled with tasks, stuff, people. Calm is the book to help you rediscover the pause button during your hustle and bustle. Mindfulness meditation is a proven way to reduce anxiety and stress and improve your overall well-being.

            Many people relate meditation to huge lifestyle change, a Buddhist who practices Zen, Calm is about simple and achievable habits that fit into the busy life all of us live. Expect this to be a workbook that provides you with a step-by-step guide to keeping a gratitude note every week, a ten-minute meditation that is able to fit into your bus-ride to work.

            Get Calm: Calm the Mind. Change the World from Amazon at $6.64

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            Last Updated on February 17, 2020

            What Is Self-Actualization? 13 Traits of Self-Actualized People

            What Is Self-Actualization? 13 Traits of Self-Actualized People

            Have you ever heard of self-actualization? As someone who has been a personal development junkie for several years now, I was shocked to learn about self-actualization recently.

            When I came across the term, I couldn’t help but think, “What is this self-actualization thing, and how have I gone so many years without hearing about it?”

            Maybe you’re in the same boat. Perhaps you’ve read up on tons of other topics like self-limiting beliefs, how to gain more self-awareness, how to be more self-confident, but you’ve never heard of self-actualization.

            Don’t fret! I’m going to give you a crash course on what self-actualization is and which 13 traits are most commonly found in a self-actualized person.

            What is Self Actualization?

            When I explore a new topic, I can’t help but start with examining the definition. This one comes from Google Dictionary:

            “The realization or fulfillment of one’s talents and potentialities, especially considered as a drive or need present in everyone.”

            The concept of self-actualization came from Abraham Maslow. Maslow was an American psychologist who is best known for his hierarchy of innate human needs. Like all hierarchy’s, Maslow’s hierarchy of needs is listed in order of priority and is often represented as a pyramid.

              At the bottom are physiological needs, such as food and water. Up from there is safety and then belongingness, which would include intimate relationships and friends. Above belongingness is esteem or things like prestige and the feeling of accomplishment.

              On the very top of Maslow’s hierarchy rests self-actualization. And as we’ve seen in the definition, this means that the highest of human needs is to achieve one’s full potential.

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              So, if becoming a self-actualized person means realizing our greatest talents and achieving our greatest potential, how do we go about doing that? How do we achieve self-actualization?

              13 Traits of a Self-Actualized Person

              Let’s start by examining the top 13 traits of a highly self-actualized person and work backward from there.

              1. They Practice Acceptance

              Self-actualized people accept themselves and other people as they are, and they have no expectations for how people should be otherwise. They understand that no one is perfect, and they accept their own quirks, desires, and flaws as well as those of others.

              While many people wish they were different in some way, self-actualized people do not. They love themselves for who they are, and they do not apologize or feel guilt or shame for who they are.

              2. They Are Authentic and True

              A self-actualized individual has a strong sense of who they are. They have a deep understanding of their beliefs and values, and they live in congruence with those beliefs and values.

              Because they accept and understand themselves, they are authentic and true to themselves. They do not pretend to be anything they are not. Not only are self-actualized people authentic, but they seek authenticity as well, both in people and in the world. They are quick to spot dishonesty.

              3. They Possess a Strong Sense of Realism

              Another characteristic of a self-actualized person is their sense of realism.

              To the average person, self-actualized people seem to have sound judgment or excellent gut instincts, but it’s far more than that. Their ability to logically and rationally evaluate the world allows them to spot dishonesties, fakes, and inconsistencies.

              Self-actualized people seek truth in everything they encounter, which gives then a keen ability to see behind the scenes more often than most people.

              4. They Live in the Here and Now

              Because self-actualized people are accepting and are grounded in reality, they are exceptionally good at living in the here and now. Self-actualized people do have goals, but they don’t focus on the future at the expense of the present.

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              For the self-actualized, the journey towards a goal is just as important as achieving the goal, if not slightly more so.

              5. They Are Autonomous and Independent

              Self-actualized people are highly independent and do not conform to the norms of society. They do not depend on people, the world, or any external factors for their happiness. Instead, they draw satisfaction from their own development and personal growth.

              They are comfortable being alone, and because they are so independent, self-actualized people are not bothered by the opinions that others may have about them. They accept themselves as they are, and the opinions of others cannot change that.

              6. They Have Excellent Moral Intuition

              Self-actualized people do not allow themselves to be molded by culture or by society. They have an excellent moral compass, and they are deliberate about their decisions. They reject what they see as bad or evil, and they adopt what they see as good.

              Because they are driven by their own moral intuition, they have a strong code of ethics that cannot be swayed by society.

              The self-actualized do not accept everything as black and white, right or wrong, They evaluate all sides of an issue and make their own decisions based on what they believe to be right and just.

              7. They Seek Growth and Development

              Self-actualized people not only draw happiness from personal growth, but they are also intrinsically motivated to develop their potential.

              They have moved beyond Maslow’s first four hierarchies are no longer motivated by basic human needs. They know that they are capable of more in life and they’re driven to see how much they can grow.

              They also view their growth as a tool to help more people, not just themselves.

              8. They are Problem-Solving, Humanitarians

              Self-actualized people have a genuine desire to help the human race. They are quick to spot problems in the world and, because they are problem solvers, they don’t hesitate to look for solutions.

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              This genuine desire to help is not rooted in personal gain, glory, recognition, or any other self-serving motive. Self-actualized people have a strong sense of purpose and want to leave the world better than they found it.

              9. They Have a Strong Sense of Purpose

              Because self-actualized people are humanitarians and they seek never-ending personal growth. They often times adopt a mission or purpose that is far beyond themselves or their own needs.

              This mission is typically meant to solve a problem for the good of all mankind and gives them a powerful sense of purpose. This purpose demands much of their energy, and they are more than happy to spend their time making a significant impact on the world.

              10. They Seek Peak Experiences

              Self-actualized people seek frequent peak experiences. These are not everyday experiences of joy—they are experiences that involve a heightened sense of wonder, awe, or ecstasy—a feeling of transcendence.[1]

              Peak performances tend to be highly significant to one’s life. They are fulfilling, thrilling, intrinsically rewarding, and in many cases, feel very spiritual.

              While rare, peak experiences can happen for anyone at any time, those who are self-actualized deliberately seek out these experiences routinely.

              11. They Embrace the Unknown

              While most people fear the unknown, self-actualized people embrace it. Self-actualized people understand that to grow as a person, you have to step beyond your comfort zone and into the unknown.

              Self-actualized people seek to reach their full potential, which means they have to explore the unknown. They cannot reach their full potential by staying where they are. They cannot cling to the familiar.

              They do not fear the unknown. Instead, the self-actualized welcome and embrace the unknown—they accept it and learn from it. They are not afraid of the many curve balls that life tends to throw their way.

              12. They Are Unconventional and Spontaneous

              Because they are not afraid of the unknown, self-actualized people tend to be very spontaneous and unconventional. While they are able to follow most social and cultural expectations, they have no problem doing their own thing when they decide it’s appropriate.

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              They do not feel confined by the norms of society and are willing to explore the unknown world beyond those expectations, even if the new experience is not a social norm.

              13. They Have a Thoughtful Sense of Humor

              Self-actualized people have a deep and thoughtful sense of humor. They are very good at finding the humor in most situations, and they enjoy laughing at themselves.

              On the other hand, they never use humor to embarrass or ridicule other people, and they never make jokes at the expense of others.

              The Path to Self-Actualization

              So there you have it: 13 traits that self-actualized people share. To get on the path to self-actualization, you can study these traits and seek to live a life that mirrors them.

              There’s no step-by-step plan to follow to become self-actualized. However, these 13 traits offer you a guide to becoming more self-actualized over time. Remember, becoming self-actualized is not a destination; it’s a journey.

              You can learn to be more present in your life, to accept yourself and those around you, and to be more spontaneous and unconventional. You can work towards finding your purpose in life, to becoming more humanitarian, and embracing the unknown.

              As you live your life, focus on improving these 13 areas of your life, and you’ll be well on your way to becoming self-actualized.

              Good luck!

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              Featured photo credit: Denys Nevozhai via unsplash.com

              Reference

              [1] Very Well Mind: Peak Experiences in Psychology

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