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12 Books to Equip You with the Soft Skills in Demand

12 Books to Equip You with the Soft Skills in Demand

Out there in the rat race known as “the corporate world”, having the right soft skills will determine whether you make it or fall off the track. Fear not! Having these skills will separate you from the competition and put you ahead of the chase. There are some great self-help books that will identify the soft skills that you already have and help you to develop new ones.

Nobody Can Survive in the Workplace Without Soft Skills

Soft skills are personal attributes that enable someone to interact effectively and harmoniously with other people. These are qualities such as communication, teamwork, adaptability, problem solving, critical observation, and conflict resolution. While you may already possess the foundations for these skills, there are a number of self-help books out there to help you hone your skills and acquire new ones. More often than not, you will be working with others which can at times be daunting. With a little light reading, you’ll be ahead of the game in no time!

Best Books To Start Honing Soft Skills

The Hard Truth About Soft Skills: Workplace Lessons Smart People Wished They’d Learned Sooner – by Peggy Klause

    Peggy Klause, a Fortune 500 Coach, has built her business by providing consultation to individuals with great technical skills but limited interpersonal skills. This is typically what holds back people in their careers rather than any lack in technical or practical capability. Her coaching provides the steps required to master communication, self-management, and social aspects of the workplace.

    Bridging the Soft Skills Gap: How to Teach the Missing Basics to Today’s Young Talent – by Bruce Tulgan

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      The most common issue challenging young people in the workplace is the lack of soft skills. The issue is becoming greater as time goes by and is hindering much young talent because they don’t know how to accurately express and carry themselves. This book teaches how to behave in the workplace in a proactive and professional manner.

      Soft Skills Training: A Workbook to Develop Skills for Employment – by Frederick H. Wentz

        Frederick Wentz was hired to teach recently-released offenders the skills necessary for employment. After going through the motions of resumes and mock interviews, he realized that to truly benefit his students he had to teach them the soft skills that are essential to getting a job. He wrote this book to give guidance to those who are new to the working class.

        Everyone Communicates, Few People Connect: What the Most Effective People do Differently – by John C. Maxwell

          Experience is not the most important quality in order to succeed. The most vital skill that you can possess is communication and connection with your listeners. You need to know how to get through to people and appeal to their interests in order to attain their attention and respect. Charisma can be a learned skill, and you can sharpen your communication without being an extrovert.

          How to Talk to Anyone: 92 Little Tricks to Have Big Success in Relationships – by Leil Lowndes

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            This book will teach you how to make a great first impression, work a room like a politician, master small talk, feed someone’s ego, and so much more! Leil Lowndes delves deeply into the different aspects of communication and how to use them to secure your success.

            Teamwork 101: What Every Leader Needs to Know – by John C. Maxwell

              Best-selling writer John C. Maxwell explains that in order to have a successful, healthy workplace, there needs to be a solid foundation of teamwork and team players. This requires a well-thought-out game-plan, positive energy in the work place, identification of negative members and their impact on the team, production, and creativity, and the ability to judge whether or not the team can fulfill the task at hand.

              Teamwork is an Individual Skill: Getting Your Work Done While Sharing Responsibility – by Christopher M. Avery, Meri Aaron Walker, and Erin O’Toole

                This book emphasizes the importance of being able to work well with others in order to excel in the workplace. Mastering teamwork requires five essential skills: assuming personal responsibility for productive relationships, creating powerful partnerships, aligning individuals around a shared purpose, discerning when something is “just right”, and developing a collaborative mindset.

                The Advantage: The 7 Soft Skills You Need to Stay Ahead – by Emma-Sue Prince

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                  The world is changing rapidly, and in order to stay ahead you need to change with it. You need these seven essential skills to make yourself stand out from the rest: adaptability, resilience, optimism, integrity, critical thinking, proactivity, and empathy. You might think that either you have these qualities or you don’t, but these qualities can be learned!

                  FLIPP the Switch: Strengthen Executive Function Skills – by Sheri Wilkins and Carol Burmeister

                    A book written by parents and educators for parents and educators. This book focuses on young people who have trouble focusing and communicating, are disorganized and impulsive, and struggle with planning or problem solving. Although this book is written with adolescents in mind, young adults could find this book incredibly beneficial to improve these skills.

                    On Adaptability…

                    AdaptAbility: How to Survive Change You Didn’t Ask For – by M.J. Ryan

                      Whether you’ve found yourself displaced from a job, struggling to stay current as you age and your coworkers keep getting younger, or are faced with the reality that your company is outdated and in danger of being phased out. We all need to learn how to deal with change and use it to our advantage.

                      On Conflict Resolution…

                      Perfect Phrases for Conflict Resolution – by Lawrence Polsky and Antoine Gerschel

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                        In the workplace you’re bound to face conflict at some point no matter how nice or easy going you are. The result of the conflict depends on how it is handled and how carefully you choose your words. This book will equip you with conflict-diffusing phrases that can cool down any situation and stop it in its tracks before it gets out of control.

                        Conflict Communication: A New Paradigm in Conscious Communication – by Rory Miller

                          Learn how to control and manipulate situations to avoid and diffuse a conflict before it become a huge issue. This book covers conflict dynamics in the workplace as well as at home so that you’re always in control of a situation.

                          These books will equip you with the soft skills needed in the workplace. Learning them will be an advantage. The importance of being able to work well with others in the workplace cannot be overemphasized, so what are you waiting for? Start reading!

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                          Jenn Beach

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                          Last Updated on October 30, 2019

                          How the Stages of Change Model Helps You Change Your Habits

                          How the Stages of Change Model Helps You Change Your Habits

                          Change is tough, there’s no doubt about it. Old habits are hard to shift, and adopting a new lifestyle can feel like an uphill battle!

                          In this article, you will learn about a simple yet powerful model:

                          Stages of change model, that explains the science behind personal transformation.

                          You’ll discover how and why some changes stick whereas others don’t last, and how long it takes to build new habits.

                          What is the Stages of Change Model?

                          Developed by researchers J.O. Prochaska and Carlo C. DiClemente over 30 years ago[1] and outlined in their book Changing For Good, the Stages of Change Model, also known as the Transtheoretical Model, was formed as a result of the authors’ research with smokers.

                          Prochaska and DiClemente were originally interested in the question of why some smokers were able to quit on their own, whereas others required professional help. Their key conclusion was that smokers (or anyone else with a bad habit) quits only when they are ready to do so.

                          Here’s an illustration done by cartoonist and illustrator Simon Kneebone about the different stages a smoker experiences when they try to quit smoking:

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                            The Stages of Change Model looks at how these conscious decisions are made. It emphasizes that change isn’t easy. People can spend a long time stuck in a stage, and some may never reach their goals.[2]

                            The model has been applied in the treatment of smoking, alcoholism, and drugs. It is also a useful way of thinking about any bad habit. Social workers, therapists, and psychologists draw on the model to understand their patients’ behaviors, and to explain the change process to the patients themselves.

                            The key advantages to the model is that it is simple to understand, is backed by extensive research, and can be applied in many situations.

                            The Stages of Change Model is a well-established psychological model that outlines six stages of personal change:

                            1. Precontemplation
                            2. Contemplation
                            3. Determination
                            4. Action
                            5. Maintenance
                            6. Termination

                            How are these stages relevant to changing habits?

                            To help you visualize the stages of change and how each progresses to the next one, please take a look at this wheel:[3]

                              Let’s look at the six stages of change,[4] together with an example that will show you how the model works in practice:

                              Stage 1: Precontemplation

                              At this stage, an individual does not plan to make any positive changes in the next six months. This may because they are in denial about their problem, feel too overwhelmed to deal with it, or are too discouraged after multiple failed attempts to change.

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                              For example, someone may be aware that they need to start exercising, but cannot find the motivation to do so. They might keep thinking about the last time they tried (and failed) to work out regularly. Only when they start to realize the advantages of making a change will they progress to the next stage.

                              Stage 2: Contemplation

                              At this stage, the individual starts to consider the advantages of changing. They start to acknowledge that altering their habits would probably benefit them, but they spend a lot of time thinking about the downside of doing so. This stage can last for a long time – possibly a year or more.

                              You can think of this as the procrastinating stage. For example, an individual begins to seriously consider the benefits of regular exercise, but feels resistant when they think about the time and effort involved. When the person starts putting together a concrete plan for change, they move to the next stage.

                              The key to moving from this stage to the next is the transformation of an abstract idea to a belief (e.g. from “Exercise is a good, sensible thing to do” to “I personally value exercise and need to do it.)[5]

                              Stage 3: Preparation

                              At this point, the person starts to put a plan in place. This stage is brief, lasting a few weeks. For example, they may book a session with a personal trainer and enrol on a nutrition course.

                              Someone who drinks to excess may make an appointment with a drug and alcohol counsellor; someone with a tendency to overwork themselves might start planning ways to devise a more realistic schedule.

                              Stage 4: Action

                              When they have decided on a plan, the individual must then put it into action. This stage typically lasts for several months. In our example, the person would begin attending the gym regularly and overhauling their diet.

                              Stage 4 is the stage at which the person’s desire for change becomes noticeable to family and friends. However, in truth, the change process began a long time ago. If someone you know seems to have suddenly changed their habits, it’s probably not so sudden after all! They will have progressed through Stages 1-3 first – you probably just didn’t know about it.

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                              Stage 5: Maintenance

                              After a few months in the Action stage, the individual will start to think about how they can maintain their changes, and make lifestyle adjustments accordingly. For instance, someone who has adopted the habit of regular workouts and a better diet will be vigilant against old triggers (such as eating junk food during a stressful time at work) and make a conscious decision to protect their new habits.

                              Unless someone actively engages with Stage 5, their new habits are liable to come unstuck. Someone who has stuck to their new habits for many months – perhaps a year or longer – may enter Stage 6.

                              Maintenance can be challenging because it entails coming up with a new set of habits to lock change in place. For instance, someone who is maintaining their new gym-going habit may have to start improving their budgeting skills in order to continue to afford their gym membership.

                              Stage 6: Termination

                              Not many people reach this stage, which is characterized by a complete commitment to the new habit and a certainty that they will never go back to their old ways. For example, someone may find it hard to imagine giving up their gym routine, and feel ill at the thought of eating junk food on a regular basis.

                              However, for the majority of people, it’s normal to stay in the Maintenance period indefinitely. This is because it takes a long time for a new habit to become so automatic and natural that it sticks forever, with little effort. To use another example, an ex-smoker will often find it hard to resist the temptation to have “just one” cigarette even a year or so after quitting. It can take years for them to truly reach the Termination stage, at which point they are no more likely to smoke than a lifelong non-smoker.

                              How long does each stage take?

                              You should be aware that some people remain in the same stage for months or even years at a time. Understanding this model will help you be more patient with yourself when making a change. If you try to force yourself to jump from Contemplation to Maintenance, you’ll just end up frustrated. On the other hand, if you take a moment to assess where you are in the change process, you can adapt your approach.

                              So if you need to make changes quickly and you are finding it hard to progress to the next stage, it’s probably time to get some professional help or adopt a new approach to forming habits.

                              The limitations of this model

                              The model is best applied when you decide in advance precisely what you want to achieve, and know exactly how you will measure it (e.g. number of times per week you go to the gym, or number of cigarettes smoked per day). Although the model has proven useful for many people, it does have limitations.

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                              Require the ability to set a realistic goal

                              For a start, there are no surefire ways of assessing whereabouts in the process you are – you just have to be honest with yourself and use your own judgement. Second, it assumes that you are physically capable of making a change, whereas in fact you might either need to adjust your goals or seek professional help.

                              If your goal isn’t realistic, it doesn’t matter whether you follow the stages – you still won’t get results. You need to decide for yourself whether your aims are reasonable.[6]

                              Difficult to judge your progress

                              The model also assumes that you are able to objectively measure your own successes and failures, which may not always be the case.[7] For instance, let’s suppose that you are trying to get into the habit of counting calories as part of your weight-loss efforts. However, even though you may think that you are recording your intake properly, you might be over or under-estimating.

                              Research shows that most people think they are getting enough exercise and eating well, but in actual fact aren’t as healthy as they believe. The model doesn’t take this possibility into account, meaning that you could believe yourself to be in the Action stage yet aren’t seeing results. Therefore, if you are serious about making changes, it may be best to get some expert advice so that you can be sure the changes you are making really will make a positive difference.

                              Conclusion

                              The Stages Of Change Model can be a wonderful way to understand change in both yourself and others.

                              While there’re some limitations in it, the Stages of Change Model helps to visualize how you go through changes so you know what to expect when you’re trying to change a habit or make some great changes in life.

                              Start by identifying one of your bad habits. Where are you in the process? What could you do next to move forwards?

                              Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

                              Reference

                              [1] Psych Central: Stages Of Change
                              [2] Boston University School Of Public Health: The Transtheoretical Model (Stages Of Change)
                              [3] Empowering Change: Stages of Change
                              [4] Boston University School Of Public Health: The Transtheoretical Model (Stages Of Change)
                              [5] Psychology Today: 5 Steps To Changing Any Behavior
                              [6] The Transtheoretical Model: Limitations Of The Transtheoretical Model
                              [7] Health Education Research: Transtheoretical Model & Stages Of Change: A Critique

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