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8 Signs You’ll Be Successful In Life (Though The Time Hasn’t Come Yet)

8 Signs You’ll Be Successful In Life (Though The Time Hasn’t Come Yet)

Do you ever wonder whether you’ll achieve your goals and manage to build the life of your dreams? Do you catch yourself wondering whether your efforts are worthwhile? When we encounter setbacks, it can be hard to believe that we’ll ever get what we most want or need. However, sometimes it can help to slow down and look for signs that you are on the right track to success, even if these indications are not always obvious. Take a look at the list below and you’ll probably discover that you already have the key ingredients for a happy, successful life.

1. You know what you want in life

You can’t reach your destination unless you know where it is you wish to go. The most successful people can readily identify their core goals and key values. If you are not sure what you want to achieve, take a few hours to sit down with a pen and piece of paper and list your goals. This simple step can save you from wasting time and energy in chasing goals that will not fulfil you.

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2. You always look for improvement

Truly exceptional people know that they can never afford to become complacent. They know that in order to stay ahead of their competition and to develop as individuals they need to continually seek out the areas in which they can improve. If you don’t look for new ways to improve yourself you risk wasting your talents and may experience a slump in motivation.

3. You learn from your failures

If you have the ability to take an honest look at what has gone wrong in your life and apply the lessons learned to your future endeavors, you are certainly on the right track. Success may be sweet but failure is a wonderful teacher. Those who learn from failure will soon find themselves making rapid progress.

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4. You can say no to things that are not your priority

Successful people are keenly aware that our time on earth is limited, and could end at any point. This means that they are adept at focusing only on important tasks, taking care to make time for fun and relaxation as well. Allowing yourself to take on other responsibilities and people that are not really any of your concern simply wastes your time. People who know how to say “no” have more space in their lives to chase success.

5. You stay positive

A positive mindset is one of the most precious assets you can have, and the best news is that developing an optimistic outlook is completely free! Of course it takes time and effort to adopt a more upbeat approach to life, and making the choice to see the best in even the bleakest of situations does not come naturally to many of us. However, remaining positive even when everything appears to be going wrong is vital in maintaining the momentum required for long-term success.

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6. You don’t care much about what others think

Asking for the opinions of friends, family and colleagues can be a valuable exercise, as it can provide you with new perspectives and ideas. However, successful people have enough self-confidence and faith in their own decisions that they do not allow what others think of them to dictate their actions or mood. This allows them to blaze new trails and become innovators in their fields.

7. You’re aware of your little progress

People who have achieved great things will often tell you that celebrating minor successes is just as important as striving for the end result. If you want to boost your motivation levels and scale new heights in life, break your largest goals down into small steps and celebrate every milestone.

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8. You’re confident but not arrogant

Much like positivity, confidence is vital. Confident people identify what they want and then take every possible step to make it happen. However, it is important to squash any tendency you may have towards arrogance. A self-important, arrogant attitude is detrimental as it means you will be reluctant to acknowledge and learn from your mistakes.

Don’t worry if you do not have all of the above eight qualities. They take time to develop and often come with maturity and experience. However, you can certainly hasten your own progress! Over the next few days, carefully monitor your thoughts. Ask yourself whether the messages you send yourself support the mindset described above. If not, it may be time to work on your self-esteem and re-evaluate what it is you are hoping to achieve in life.

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Jay Hill

Jay writes about communication and happiness on Lifehack.

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Last Updated on September 18, 2020

13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

For the original article by Celestine: 13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

“We all have problems. The way we solve them is what makes us different.” ~Unknown

“It’s not stress that kills us, it is our reaction to it.” – Hans Selye

Have you ever experienced moments when things just don’t go your way? For example, losing your keys, accidentally spilling your drink, waking up late, missing your buses/trains, forgetting to bring your things, and so on?

You’re not alone. All of us, myself included, experience times when things don’t go as we expect.

Here is my guide on how to deal with daily setbacks.

1. Take a step back and evaluate

When something bad happens, take a step back and evaluate the situation. Some questions to ask yourself:

  1. What is the problem?
  2. Are you the only person facing this problem in the world today?
  3. How does this problem look like at an individual level? A national level? On a global scale?
  4. What’s the worst possible thing that can happen to you as a result of this?
  5. How is it going to impact your life in the next 1 year? 5 years? 10 years?

Doing this exercise is not to undermine the problem or disclaiming responsibility, but to consider different perspectives, so you can adopt the best approach for it. Most problems we encounter daily may seem like huge issues when they crop up, but most, if not all, don’t have much impact in our life beyond that day.

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2. Vent if you have to, but don’t linger on the problem

If you feel very frustrated and need to let off some steam, go ahead and do that. Talk to a friend, complain, crib about it, or scream at the top of your lungs if it makes you happy.

At the same time, don’t get caught up with venting. While venting may temporarily relieve yourself, it’s not going to solve the problem ultimately. You don’t want to be an energy vampire.

Vent if there’s a need to, but do it for 15 to 20 minutes. Then move on.

3. Realize there are others out there facing this too

Even though the situation may be frustrating, you’re not alone. Remember there are almost 7 billion people in the world today, and chances are that other people have faced the same thing before too. Knowing it’s not just you helps you to get out of a self-victimizing mindset.

4. Process your thoughts/emotions

Process your thoughts/emotions with any of the four methods:

  1. Journal. Write your unhappiness in a private diary or in your blog. It doesn’t have to be formal at all – it can be a brain dump on rough paper or new word document. Delete after you are done.
  2. Audio taping. Record yourself as you talk out what’s on your mind. Tools include tape recorder, your PC (Audacity is a freeware for recording/editing audio) and your mobile (most mobiles today have audio recording functions). You can even use your voice mail for this. Just talking helps you to gain awareness of your emotions. After recording, play back and listen to what you said. You might find it quite revealing.
  3. Meditation. At its simplest form, meditation is just sitting/lying still and observing your reality as it is – including your thoughts and emotions. Some think that it involves some complex mambo-jumbo, but it doesn’t.
  4. Talking to someone. Talking about it with someone helps you work through the issue. It also gets you an alternate viewpoint and consider it from a different angle.

5. Acknowledge your thoughts

Don’t resist your thoughts, but acknowledge them. This includes both positive and negative thoughts.

By acknowledging, I mean recognizing these thoughts exist. So if say, you have a thought that says, “Wow, I’m so stupid!”, acknowledge that. If you have a thought that says, “I can’t believe this is happening to me again”, acknowledge that as well.

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Know that acknowledging the thoughts doesn’t mean you agree with them. It’s simply recognizing the existence of said thoughts so that you can stop resisting yourself and focus on the situation on hand.

6. Give yourself a break

If you’re very stressed out by the situation, and the problem is not time sensitive, then give yourself a break. Take a walk, listen to some music, watch a movie, or get some sleep. When you’re done, you should feel a lot more revitalized to deal with the situation.

7. Uncover what you’re really upset about

A lot of times, the anger we feel isn’t about the world. You may start off feeling angry at someone or something, but at the depth of it, it’s anger toward yourself.

Uncover the root of your anger. I have written a five part anger management series on how to permanently overcome anger.

After that, ask yourself: How can you improve the situation? Go to Step #9, where you define your actionable steps. Our anger comes from not having control on the situation. Sitting there and feeling infuriated is not going to change the situation. The more action we take, the more we will regain control over the situation, the better we will feel.

8. See this as an obstacle to be overcome

As Helen Keller once said,

“Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experiences of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired and success achieved.”

Whatever you’re facing right now, see it as an obstacle to be overcome. In every worthy endeavor, there’ll always be countless obstacles that emerge along the way. These obstacles are what separate the people who make it, and those who don’t. If you’re able to push through and overcome them, you’ll emerge a stronger person than before. It’ll be harder for anything to get you down in the future.

9. Analyze the situation – Focus on actionable steps

In every setback, there are going to be things that can’t be reversed since they have already occurred. You want to focus on things that can still be changed (salvageable) vs. things that have already happened and can’t be changed. The only time the situation changes is when you take steps to improve it. Rather than cry over spilt milk, work through your situation:

  1. What’s the situation?
  2. What’s stressing you about this situation?
  3. What are the next steps that’ll help you resolve them?
  4. Take action on your next steps!

After you have identified your next steps, act on them. The key here is to focus on the actionable steps, not the inactionable steps. It’s about regaining control over the situation through direct action.

10. Identify how it occurred (so it won’t occur again next time)

A lot of times we react to our problems. The problem occurs, and we try to make the best out of what has happened within the context. While developing a healthy coping mechanism is important (which is what the other helping points are on), it’s also equally important, if not more, to understand how the problem arose. This way, you can work on preventing it from taking place next time, vs. dealing reactively with it.

Most of us probably think the problem is outside of our control, but reality is most of the times it’s fully preventable. It’s just a matter of how much responsibility you take over the problem.

For example, for someone who can’t get a cab for work in the morning, he/she may see the problem as a lack of cabs in the country, or bad luck. However, if you trace to the root of the problem, it’s probably more to do with (a) Having unrealistic expectations of the length of time to get a cab. He/she should budget more time for waiting for a cab next time. (b) Oversleeping, because he/she was too tired from working late the previous day. He/she should allocate enough time for rest next time. He/she should also pick up better time management skills, so as to finish work in lesser time.

11. Realize the situation can be a lot worse

No matter how bad the situation is, it can always be much worse. A plus point vs. negative point analysis will help you realize that.

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12. Do your best, but don’t kill yourself over it

No matter how bad your situation may seem, do your best, but don’t kill yourself over it. Life is too beautiful to worry so much over daily issues. Take a step back (#1), give yourself a break if you need to (#6), and do what you can within your means (#9). Everything else will unfold accordingly. Worrying too much about the outcome isn’t going to change things or make your life any better.

13. Pick out the learning points from the encounter

There’s something to learn from every encounter. What have you learned from this situation? What lessons have you taken away?

After you identify your learning points, think about how you’re going to apply them moving forward. With this, you’ve clearly gained something from this encounter. You’ve walked away a stronger, wiser, better person, with more life lessons to draw from in the future.

Get the manifesto version of this article: [Manifesto] What To Do When Things Don’t Go Your Way

Featured photo credit: Alice Donovan Rouse via unsplash.com

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