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3 Benefits of Effective Communication in a Relationship

3 Benefits of Effective Communication in a Relationship

No romantic relationship can flourish without effective communication between the couple. Communication is the transmitting, disseminating, and sharing of vital information between two people. Living together as husband and wife (or any romantic partnership) can only work when there is an effective back and forth of information between the two involved. It is not strange that many relationships fail to last long as a result of a fragile foundation caused by shoddy communication. As we always learn, effective communication is the key to a successful relationship.

Powerful listening and communication connects a husband and wife together and intensifies the intimacy that acts as glue to holding any relationship together. Like communication, listening is not as much an innate skill that all people possess, but is more so a skill that individuals must make an effort to learn. If in our daily dealings with our partner, we tend to always talk and not listen, then communication becomes meaningless. Interrupting or talking without listening makes it difficult to hear what your partner is saying, particularly when our feelings, thoughts, and opinions will vary. Effective communication in a relationship makes any romantic relationship easier, sweeter, and more enjoyable for both parties involved. Any relationship that lacks effective communication might experience their share of misunderstandings, frustrations, unhappiness, fighting – and can ultimately lead to the dissolution of the relationship.

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There are many reasons why you should pay attention to maintaining effective communication in a relationship. The following three reasons are why learning effective communication can benefit our relationships.

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1. It Shows Value

Undoubtedly, listening to another party’s words shows a sign of respect to the speaker. When having a discussion, listening to each other shows that you respect what he or she is saying. Even if we disagree with what’s being said, we still need to admire thoughts and feelings of the individual. With effective communication, it is shows your values to your partner, and your partner sees you as a valuable asset for him or her. On the other hand, if there is lack of effective and flourishing communication among partners, then one partner becomes a liability to the other partner and communication becomes a chore versus something you genuinely enjoy.

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2. It Helps Us To Understand

There is a clear difference between communication and effective communication, and that difference lies in the effectiveness. Effective communication makes partners understand each other. The end goal of communication should always be to understand – not to fight, not to dismiss, not to invalidate, but to understand. The moment we tend to understand our partners and listen to them even in times we don’t agree, we can move forward with the situation and take the necessary steps to enhance the relationship. Understanding your partner avoids a lot of things like frequent fighting, frequent abusive words, harsh words to each other, and many more. For women especially, understand your partner without judgement is a good way to get your man committed and enamored with you.[1]

3. It Helps To Be Approachable

In relationships, it can be a good thing to know that someone is actually there to talk to us about anything at all. Effective communication can help others feel comfortable with approaching us any time they need or want to talk about anything that might be bothering them. We are likely to have a more open and healthy romantic relationship if we are approachable to our partners. Many partners live together in a room but they can’t approach each other because the relationship lacks the comfort level that allows for certain subjects to be broached, even if the topic is an uncomfortable one.

It is very important to focus in on effective communication as a vital tool in building and maintaining your relationship. We want others to respect, understand, and be approachable to us, right? Work on learning to listening and communicating about any and everything. Watch your romantic relationship grow in positive ways because of it.

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Reference

[1]http://www.sabtrends.com/2016/07/how-to-get-your-man-so-committed-to-you.html

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Saminu Abass

Content Writer and Blogger

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Last Updated on September 10, 2018

Overcoming The Pain Of A Breakup: 3 Suggestions Based On Science

Overcoming The Pain Of A Breakup: 3 Suggestions Based On Science

We thought that the expression ‘broken heart’ was just a metaphor, but science is telling us that it is not: breakups and rejections do cause physical pain. When a group of psychologists asked research participants to look at images of their ex-partners who broke up with them, researchers found that the same brain areas that are activated by physical pain are also activated by looking at images of ex-partners. Looking at images of our ex is a painful experience, literally.[1].

Given that the effect of rejections and breakups is the same as the effect of physical pain, scientists have speculated on whether the practices that reduce physical pain could be used to reduce the emotional pain that follows from breakups and rejections. In a study on whether painkillers reduce the emotional pain caused by a breakup, researchers found that painkillers did help. Individuals who took painkillers were better able to deal with their breakup. Tamar Cohen wrote that “A simple dose of paracetamol could help ease the pain of a broken heart.”[2]

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Just like painkillers can be used to ease the pain of a broken heart, other practices that ease physical pain can also be used to ease the pain of rejections and breakups. Three of these scientifically validated practices are presented in this article.

Looking at images of loved ones

While images of ex-partners stimulate the pain neuro-circuitry in our brain, images of loved ones activate a different circuitry. Looking at images of people who care about us increases the release of oxytocin in our body. Oxytocin, or the “cuddle hormone,” is the hormone that our body relies on to induce in us a soothing feeling of tranquility, even when we are under high stress and pain.

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In fact, oxytocin was found to have a crucial role as a mother is giving birth to her baby. Despite the extreme pain that a mother has to endure during delivery, the high level of oxytocin secreted by her body transforms pain into pleasure. Mariem Melainine notes that, “Oxytocin levels are usually at their peak during delivery, which promotes a sense of euphoria in the mother and helps her develop a stronger bond with her baby.”[3]

Whenever you feel tempted to look at images of your ex-partner, log into your Facebook page and start browsing images of your loved ones. As Eva Ritvo, M.D. notes, “Facebook fools our brain into believing that loved ones surround us, which historically was essential to our survival. The human brain, because it evolved thousands of years before photography, fails on many levels to recognize the difference between pictures and people”[4]

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Exercise

Endorphins are neurotransmitters that reduce our perception of pain. When our body is high on endorphins, painful sensations are kept outside of conscious awareness. It was found that exercise causes endorphins to be secreted in the brain and as a result produce a feeling of power, as psychologist Alex Korb noted in his book: “Exercise causes your brain to release endorphins, neurotransmitters that act on your neurons like opiates (such as morphine or Vicodin) by sending a neural signal to reduce pain and provide anxiety relief.”[5] By inhibiting pain from being transmitted to our brain, exercise acts as a powerful antidote to the pain caused by rejections and breakups.

Meditation

Jon Kabat Zinn, a doctor who pioneered the use of mindfulness meditation therapy for patients with chronic pain, has argued that it is not pain itself that is harmful to our mental health, rather, it is the way we react to pain. When we react to pain with irritation, frustration, and self-pity, more pain is generated, and we enter a never ending spiral of painful thoughts and sensations.

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In order to disrupt the domino effect caused by reacting to pain with pain, Kabat Zinn and other proponents of mindfulness meditation therapy have suggested reacting to pain through nonjudgmental contemplation and acceptance. By practicing meditation on a daily basis and getting used to the habit of paying attention to the sensations generated by our body (including the painful ones and by observing these sensations nonjudgmentally and with compassion) our brain develops the habit of reacting to pain with grace and patience.

When you find yourself thinking about a recent breakup or a recent rejection, close your eyes and pay attention to the sensations produced by your body. Take deep breaths and as you are feeling the sensations produced by your body, distance yourself from them, and observe them without judgment and with compassion. If your brain starts wandering and gets distracted, gently bring back your compassionate nonjudgmental attention to your body. Try to do this exercise for one minute and gradually increase its duration.

With consistent practice, nonjudgmental acceptance will become our default reaction to breakups, rejections, and other disappointments that we experience in life. Every rejection and every breakup teaches us great lessons about relationships and about ourselves.

Featured photo credit: condesign via pixabay.com

Reference

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