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How to Trust Your True Calling

How to Trust Your True Calling

The Connection

We all have a Calling. The trick is “How to Trust Your True Calling?”  A Calling starts out like a first-time meeting with someone absolutely captivating or mysterious. It’s sexier than anything you’ve ever seen. You keep bumping into your Calling here and there, but never the right time or place for an extended hook up. Then, it disappears.

A little time passes, then “BAM”, something seen, heard, smelled, touched, or tasted screams “Here’s your Calling’s number” and it feels right! You muster some courage and you make the call.

Near Misses

Unfortunately, your Calling has lousy cell reception. When it calls you, it sounds like a possessed, static breathing robot you can’t understand. Or, you connect sporadically amidst dropped calls. This becomes phone tag frustration and uncertainty about your Calling. This experience leaves you wondering if this relationship is going anywhere.

However, your Calling becomes a rock in your shoe. It irritates and nags you off and on. It won’t leave you alone. And, you can’t leave it alone. How do you get rid of life’s static and dropped calls where your Calling is concerned? The answer is getting exclusive with your Calling.

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Getting Exclusive with Your Calling

You solve your poor Calling connection and relationship trust issues by boosting your Calling’s signal in three easy steps:

#1 Same Carrier Plan

All relationships begin with the same plan of action: Fit or No Fit. You must determine if you and your Calling are a good to great fit. You must ask yourself tough questions, before getting exclusive with your Calling. These questions revolve around positive and indelible experience with your Calling that were “Good to Great”, captivating, compelling, driving, satisfying, fulfilling, enriching, helped others, etc.:

  • What internal dialog or external experiences scream this Calling is for you?
  • Do people comment on how well you two fit together?
  • Do people assume you and your Calling are together?
  • Do you feel happiest, engaged, and meaning-filled hanging out with your Calling?
  • Can you imagine your best life without your Calling?
  • Do you have a vision for your best life with your Calling dead center?

If your responses prove indelible and positive, you and your Calling are moving closer to crystal clear communication and a trusted life’s direction. Let’s talk plan upgrades for you two love birds.

#2 Upgrades

You can’t afford communications issues in a new relationship, so you’ll need to upgrade your thinking. Your brain will run old programming or negative thoughts until you proactively challenge and change them.

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Your brain operates on a closed loop system. Your loop is driven by what you say is important. It is not driven by what you WANT or NEED. It is driven by what you FOCUS ON. This focus concretes into your trusted beliefs (Good or Bad). Your beliefs shape your reality, drive your actions, and impact your results.

Not sure? Look around. Bingo – you are the sum of your decisions. It’s not what happens to us, but how you respond that shapes your life. We respond to life based on our beliefs about life. Change your beliefs – change your life. This begins with you solidifying belief in your Calling, which requires a change in your thinking.

Here’s how you will upgrade your thinking:

  1. Focus on positive inputs (affirmations, information, experiences, preferences, hope, faith, etc.) and tell your brain “Fetch my Calling”.
  2. EXPECT and ACCEPT the evidence your brain fetches, to demonstrate you are on the right track.

Your Calling’s fit will help solidify your life’s direction and best life shifts. Finally, get some insurance. Insurance against the static of your old habits, fears, and doubts. Unchecked, this static can disrupt your Calling’s communication and relationship.

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#3 Get Insurance

My first I-Phone fell into a Maryland snowbank and was never seen again. Fortunately, I had insurance. Your Calling communication and relationship needs insurance too. The insurance takes two forms: Clear Development Goals and Disciplined Behavior Management.

Clear Development Goals:

Your calling must be developed into life support for your lifestyle, based on increasingly complex goals. As life changes, you update or change your development goals accordingly.

GOAL: You believe your Calling is to be a Veterinarian. This best life has you opening a clinic and serving rural Iowa.

EXAMPLE:  Your development goals would include (1) formal education and (2) professional exposure illuminating successful rural Veterinarians in Iowa. You MUST enroll in a Veterinary Sciences program, then follow through with studying and tough choices supporting your studies.

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If you have other major life commitments (job, children, mortgage, etc.), you will re-prioritize those responsibilities around your Calling’s development. In time, your Calling will return the favor by centering everything you want around you.

Disciplined Behavior Management:

Nothing happens unless you take consistent action. 92% of New Year’s resolutions fail, because they lack a clear plan and supporting disciplines. Pursuing your calling is no different. You need goals supported by disciplined behaviors. Continuing our Veterinarian scenario:

ACTION: You would (1) FIND a mentor and (2) get direct experience from professionals directly. This reinforces your trusted belief and direction. You learn success skills from those living their Calling as successful rural Veterinarians in Iowa.

Goals and disciplined behaviors INSURE you are continuously growing in skill and knowledge. It INSURES you are forming the right behaviors needed for achieving the Veterinary expertise required for`and supporting your best life and lifestyle.

Conclusion

With all relationships, you will hit bumps in the road. You will question whether you and your Calling truly fit. This is normal, so revisit Steps 1 – 2. This will help you re-affirm your love for and belief in your Calling. In time, your Calling expertise will grow, pay your bills, fuel your happiness, serve others, and give you the life and lifestyle you desire.

Featured photo credit: Photodune via photodune.net

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John St. John

Blogger, Writer, Leadership Developer, and Purpose Coach

How to Trust Your True Calling Escaping the Corporate Cube Farm

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Last Updated on August 10, 2020

10 Principles for Success to Live Your Dream Life

10 Principles for Success to Live Your Dream Life

Are you stressed out and overwhelmed, wishing you had more time to do the things that really matter? Are you ready to do something better, something special in your life or your career?

If you’re ready to do what you want in life, then the 10 principles of success are what you need to follow.

You were born with a gift that no one else in the world can express like you. When you dance to your own music, you naturally develop your innate abilities and excel in work and life. You are a total rock star. But when you live someone else’s idea of who you should be, it throws off your groove.

Many people—maybe you—stopped following their dreams way too early in life because their talents were ignored, minimized, or shamed. They didn’t have the chops to win an American Idol competition or nab an Olympic gold medal, so they stopped expressing their inborn gifts altogether.

You don’t need to be an award winner to rock your life. Living your dream life is about discovering your superpowers and feeling vibrant and joyful when you use them. It’s about owning what makes you unique and finding like-minded people to support you.

Here are 10 success principles to help you live a rich and rewarding life on your terms that have worked with thousands of people in my workshops and will work for you, too.

1. Get a Hobby to Move Closer to Your Dreams

If you never became a professional dancer or a world-renowned author, it does NOT mean you should stop dancing or writing! These activities make you come alive, even if you “only” do them as favorite pastimes.

Engaging in a hobby is one of the most important success principles you can follow to move closer to your dreams.

When you try something creative for the first time or in a long while, you begin to see opportunities at work and in life that you were unaware of before. You also feel happier and more energized, according to a recent study from New Zealand.[1]

Some of my most burned-out executive clients reinvigorated their careers by discovering a creative outlet that refueled them after the workday ended. Research at San Francisco State University shows that having a hobby lowers stress and helps you succeed at work.[2]

So, give yourself permission to try new things and revisit old passions you gave up long ago. Setting aside just one hour a week for personal exploration can significantly change your life.

Who knows? Your creative outlet could transform into a thriving business or lead to a new profession down the road.

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2. Focus on Your Strengths, Not Your Weaknesses

Did you know that you are more likely to succeed when you develop your natural strengths rather than work on your weaknesses? The problem is that you probably don’t know where your true talents lie.

Here are a few options to help you discover your unique strengths. You can:

  • Take the VIA Character Strengths Survey[3]
  • Try Gallup’s CliftonStrengths Assessment[4]
  • Answer a few Superpower Questions

Once you understand what makes you tick, you can use these skills at work and your personal life to get more done in less time. If you boost your unique abilities through practice and study, you can accelerate your career and become a leader in a field that matters to you. It’s worth investing in yourself this way.

3. Jumping off a Cliff is NOT Required

Here’s the deal: most people are too afraid to change. When participants first come to my workshops, they tell me they have mouths to feed, bills to pay, and fear that if they follow their dreams, someone will get hurt.

The old saying “leap and the net shall appear” does not comfort them. Because they are hesitant to plunge into the unknown, they believe their only option is to stay put where they are in life. Can you relate?

You do not have to sacrifice the life you have now to start a new one. I was a psychology professor by day and singer by night for years before I transitioned into a full-time music career.

Just take a little time out each week to do what enlivens you through a hobby, volunteer work, etc. Get a feel for it.

Is it what you really want? If so, increase the time you spend doing it and make the transition when the time feels right.

4. Give Your Inner Critic Some Love

The main culprit that keeps you from stepping outside your comfort zone and getting the life of your dreams is KCRP or K-CRAP – the radio station that plays 24/7 in your head. The moment you try to do something interesting with your life it slaps you down with such chart-topping killer hooks as “Who do you think you are?” and “You’ll never be good enough!”.

Have you ever noticed that KCRP’s mean-spirited DJ sounds like your parents, teachers, bosses, and other authority figures who shut you down creatively? These folks don’t need to stifle you any longer (although they often still do) because your inner critic does it for them. That keeps you stuck in a rut.

To break free, try thinking of this DJ as a gruff old grandfather who gives you crap to keep you safe. Remember, this grumpy grandpa is woefully out of touch with the times. So, his stern opinions don’t really matter much, do they? Give him a pat on the back for his good intentions, and put your focus back on what makes you come alive.

This success principle will give you the courage to venture into the unknown where you can dance to the beat of your own drummer.

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5. Embrace Your Inner Self

Many of us don’t go after our dreams because we’re afraid folks will find out how odd or strange we are. But our little eccentricities often turn out to be our greatest strengths. Yes, it’s good to be quirky.

Odds are, you lost track of your true passions and talents before you were even old enough to know you were getting off-track. You became slowly “adulterated” by learning to:

  • Take on family roles that don’t match who you really are.
  • Spit back what teachers taught you in school rather than risk getting bad grades for being original.
  • Hide parts of yourself that don’t seem acceptable to certain social groups.

The price for fitting in is that you may wind up leading a life that doesn’t fit you all that well. Your true calling becomes clear when you embrace what makes you different from others and allow yourself to stand out from the crowd, even if it feels awkward. Often, the very qualities you view as your flaws are your greatest gifts.

Here’s How to Listen to Your Inner Voice for Greater Fulfillment.

6. See the Bigger Picture to Find Your True Calling

I cannot stress the importance of this success principle enough. Your true calling is right in front of you. But you may miss it because you’re looking for it in the wrong place.

To “see” it clearly, try widening your point of view.

Case in point: Maria felt she needed to retire early from being a police detective, so she could travel abroad. I encouraged Maria to think of ways that she could continue to serve as a law enforcer (a career she loved) and travel overseas at the same time.

A few months later, Maria landed a job with the United Nations in Bosnia training the local police force to understand and embrace human rights procedures.

Like Maria, you are an everyday rock star capable of accomplishing greater things than you can imagine. Is what you’re looking for right in front of you, too? Do you have an inkling of what it may be?

Look beyond your day-to-day activities, your current job, and even the town you live in. View your life from an eagle’s perspective and be open to new possibilities.

7. Try a Little Wish-List Magic

Pretend I’m your fairy godmother and I give you permission right now to be your most magnificent self. What kind of life would be music to your ears? It doesn’t matter whether it seems unattainable or even downright crazy. Write it down on a wish list.

Get quiet. Be honest. Think big.

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What would you like your career, your relationships, your health, your finances, and your spiritual life to be like? Jot down enough details so that your wishes seem tangible to you. Then, look at this list every morning before you start your day and every night before you go to sleep.

Sounds silly? It’s not. It works! Permitting yourself to daydream about a rich and fulfilling life is the first step to manifesting it.

8. Take Breaks to Get Clues About Your Ideal Future

Did you know that working straight through to a deadline leads to diminishing returns? Research shows that taking a break for 15 minutes every 75 to 90 minutes can help you recharge, refresh your focus, and get more done in less time.[5]

Wait, it gets better! A Stanford study shows that walking increases your creative output increases by 60 percent. Doing repetitive activities such as walking, running, riding your bike, swimming, and sweeping allow solutions to problems to pop into your mind out of nowhere.[6]

What does this success principle have to do with creating your dream life?

These mini-breaks allow you to get vital clues for what to do next to attain your ideal future. Plus, you won’t waste precious time and energy getting lost in other people’s agendas.

9. Take Action on Your Inspired Ideas

Once an inspired thought pops into your mind, take action.

This is one of the most powerful success principles for turning your dreams into reality; the sooner the better. Whatever it is—from calling an old friend to taking a new route home—be sure to do it!

Pay attention to your oddball hunches. You need to go after what you want, not just dream about it. As comedian Jim Carrey warns,

“You can’t just visualize and go eat a sandwich.”

10. Count Your Rockstar Moments

Still not sure you have what it takes to get your dream life? This final success principle is guaranteed to help.

Make a list of everything you’ve ever accomplished. As you read back through it, put a star next to each item, and let it sink in.

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You’ll be pleasantly surprised by how good you’ll feel about yourself afterward. You’ll also see how effective you’ve been in the past at getting what you want. You’ve succeeded before, you can succeed again.

You already rock. You just need to own it. Trust me, you’ve got this!

Final Thoughts

Eleanor Roosevelt said,

“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.”

Following these success principles will help you find the time and energy to do the things that really matter and live with clear intention.

By spending just one hour a week doing something you love, focusing on your strengths and achievements, embracing what makes you different, and acting on inspired ideas, you can create a life that is a perfect fit for you, step-by-step.

If you don’t have a clue about what your dream life could look like yet, don’t worry. Your heart knows. It has been “talking” to you for a long time. It’s just being muffled by KCRP, buried under a lot of “shoulds” and fear.

This article can also help you figure out the life you truly want to live: How to Get Motivated and Be Happy Every Day When You Wake Up.

Stand still, get quiet, and listen. It’s constantly telling you what you need to do to realize your own rockstar potential. It may be just a whisper now, but the more you pay attention to it, the louder it will get, and the easier it will be to follow.

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Featured photo credit: Rahul Dey via unsplash.com

Reference

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