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10 Ways to Become More Approachable

10 Ways to Become More Approachable

It’s important to make an effort to be approachable for a number of reasons – including the fact that it will help us have a successful career, be more likable and help people feel comfortable around us. In short, life is easier and more fun when we are welcoming and approachable. With that in mind, it makes sense to become more conscious and aware of ways to make people feel at ease around us.

This process is a long but worthwhile journey, but here are some ways to get started. 10 ways to become more approachable:

1. Make eye contact and smile.

According to SocialPro, smiling all the time can come off as insincere or be subconsciously picked up as covering up nervousness – instead, they suggest making a concerted effort to smile when:

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  • You’ve just met a new person.
  • Whenever the other person is smiling.
  • They are telling a joke, or the story they’re telling indicates something amusing.
  • When you’re about to take off.
  • Making eye contact makes other people way more likely to approach you.

2. Use open body posture.

WikiHow suggests that an open body posture is one of the ultimate ways to seem more approachable to other people and make them feel comfortable. If you’re not quite clear on what that looks like, be intentional about:

  • Keeping your shoulders up and not slouching.
  • Leaning back slightly when sitting.
  • Have your hands down and at your side, avoiding crossed arms or putting your hands in your pockets.

3. Put away things that cover your face or distractions like your phone.

Being on your phone or covering up your face, whether it be with a hat or with your hands, sends an instinctive message to people that could consider talking with you. It might be comforting to always be on your phone, but it won’t make you more approachable.

4. Take a deep interest in things that other people are into.

In situations like a workplace, taking a strong interest in the types of hobbies people enjoy or what they did this weekend, makes it more likely that people will open up to you, and consider you their friend. It’s just the nature of our minds that we start to enjoy the company of someone who listens. If you make a concerted effort to listen and bring up things someone has said they were interested in before, they will naturally gravitate towards you.

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5. Ask 3 Questions for every one statement about yourself that you make.

An easy way to try to remember to listen more is to ask 3 questions before talking about something you’re very into.

  • Don’t only talk about the other person – just make an effort to let the conversation be about what they are into more often.
  • When you do get a chance to talk about something you’re passionate about, be sure to not dominate the conversation but find creative ways to work the other person into the conversation and pivot back to their subjects.

6. Try new things like traveling to different areas or countries.

According to France Student Travel, “nothing breaks people out of a certain kind of small thinking and closed off behavior like getting out and seeing other cultures.”

It’s hard to deny that whether you’re from Texas and get a chance to go to California or you’re able to take a class trip to France, immersing yourself fully in a different culture is an incredible way to become more open and welcoming to different points of view.

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7. Make an effort to attempt one new activity you haven’t tried every month.

Besides traveling – become a tourist in your own city and have new and exciting things to talk about with the people you meet by challenging yourself to try one new activity for every 30 day period. It doesn’t have to be skydiving! Visit a new apple orchard, walk around the whole city, or hit up that super iconic area that you just haven’t got to yet even though out-of-towners love it.

8. Try to see things from an outside perspective and study other cultures viewpoints.

New ways of life, philosophies, and points of view are less scary when we really take the time to read up on them, watch documentaries and put ourselves out there and are welcoming to people who espouse these ideas. If we make an effort to welcome new cultural viewpoints, we make ourselves significantly more approachable on the outside too – people can sense if you are open to new ideas and ways of life.

9. Expect new people to find you and want to start conversations.

“The biggest thing we can do to help people feel comfortable around us – is to truly be comfortable with ourselves,” says Spenser Baldwin of Omaha SEO.

By expecting that people will want to talk to us, and allowing ourselves that confidence we start to mentally prepare and make our whole approach more accommodating for others.

10.Become very self-aware and ask people close to you what you’re strengths and weaknesses are.

By liking yourself more, and knowing your strengths, you make people feel comfortable being around you because being self-aware puts you more at ease. Knowing your weaknesses is important too – if we know that ‘not asking questions’ or having a closed off body posture is a weakness of ours, we can make an effort to correct it.

Always focus more on your strengths, but don’t be blind to what you can do better on, and think of those things as an opportunity to sharpen your skills of making other people more comfortable.

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Featured photo credit: PicJumbo via picjumbo.com

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Last Updated on September 12, 2019

12 Things You Should Remember When Feeling Lost in Life

12 Things You Should Remember When Feeling Lost in Life

Even the most charismatic people you know, whether in person or celebrities of some sort, experience days where they feel lost in life and isolated from everyone else.

While it’s good to know we aren’t alone in this feeling, the question still remains:

What should we do when we feel lost and lonely?

Here are 12 things to remember:

1. Recognize That It’s Okay!

The truth is, there are times you need to be alone. If you’ve always been accustomed to being in contact with people, this may prove difficult.

However, learning how to be alone and comfortable in your own skin will give you confidence and a sense of self reliance.

We cheat ourselves out of the opportunity to become self reliant when we look for constant companionship.

Learn how to embrace your me time: What Your Fear of Being Alone Is Really About and How to Get over It

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2. Use Your Lost and Loneliness as a Self-Directing Guide

You’ve most likely heard the expression: “You have to know where you’ve been to know where you’re going.”

Loneliness also serves as a life signal to indicate you’re in search of something. It’s when we’re in the midst of solitude that answers come from true soul searching.

Remember, there is more to life than what you’re feeling.

3. Realize Loneliness Helps You Face the Truth

Being in the constant company of others, although comforting sometimes, can often serve as a distraction when we need to face the reality of a situation.

Solitude cuts straight to the chase and forces you to deal with the problem at hand. See it as a blessing that can serve as a catalyst to set things right!

4. Be Aware That You Have More Control Than You Think

Typically, when we see ourselves as being lost or lonely, it gives us an excuse to view everything we come in contact with in a negative light. It lends itself to putting ourselves in the victim mode, when the truth of the matter is that you choose your attitude in every situation.

No one can force a feeling upon you! It is YOU who has the ultimate say as to how you choose to react.

5. Embrace the Freedom That the Feeling of Being Alone Can Offer

Instead of wallowing in self pity, which many are prone to do because of loneliness, try looking at your circumstance as a new-found freedom.

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Most people are in constant need of approval of their viewpoints. Try enjoying the fact that  you don’t need everyone you care about to support your decisions.

6. Acknowledge the Person You Are Now

Perhaps you feel a sense of loneliness and confusion because your life circumstances have taken you away from the persona that others know to be you.

Perhaps the new you differs radically from the old. Realize that life is about change and how we react to that change. It’s okay that you’re not who you used to be.

Take a look at this article and learn to accept your imperfect self: Accept Yourself (Flaws and All): 7 Benefits of Being Vulnerable

7. Keep Striving to Do Your Best

Often those who are feeling isolated and unto themselves will develop a defeatist attitude. They’ll do substandard work because their self esteem is low and they don’t care.

Never let this feeling take away your sense of worth! Do your best always and when you come through this dark time, others will admire how you stayed determined in spite of the obstacles you had to overcome.

And to live your best life, you must do this ONE thing: step out of your comfort zone.

8. Don’t Forget That Time Is Precious

When we’re lost in a sea of loneliness and depression, it’s all too easy to reflect on regrets of past life events. This does nothing but feed negativity and perpetuate the situation.

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Instead of falling prey to this common pitfall, put one foot in front of the other and acknowledge every positive step you take. By doing this, you can celebrate the struggles you overcome at the end of the day.

9. Remember, Things Happen for a Reason

Every circumstance we encounter in our life is designed to teach us and that lesson is in turn passed on to others.

Sometimes we’re fortunate enough to figure out the lesson to be learned, while other times, we simply need to have faith that if the lesson wasn’t meant directly for us to learn from, how we handled it was observed by someone who needed to learn.

Your solitude and feeling of lost, in this instance, although painful possibly, may be teaching someone else.

10. Journal During This Time

Record your thoughts when you’re at the height of loneliness and feeling lost. You’ll be amazed when you reflect back at how you viewed things at the time and how far you’ve come later.

This time (if recorded) can give you a keen insight into who you are and what makes you feel the way you feel.

11. Remember You Aren’t the First to Feel This Way

It’s quite common to feel as if we’re alone and no one else has ever felt this way before. We think this because at the time of our distress, we’re silently observing others around us who are seemingly fine in every way.

The truth is, we can’t possibly know the struggles of those around us unless they elect to share them. We ALL have known this pain!

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Try confiding in someone you trust and ask them how they deal with these feelings when they experienced it. You may be surprised at what you learn.

12. Ask for Help If the Problem Persists

The feeling of being lost and lonely is common to everyone, but typically it will last for a relatively short period of time.

Most people will confess to, at one time or another, being in a “funk.” But if the problem persists longer than you feel it should, don’t ignore it.

When your ability to reason and consider things rationally becomes impaired, do not poo poo the problem away and think it isn’t worthy of attention. Seek medical help.

Afraid to ask for help? Here’s how to change your outlook to aim high!

Final Thoughts

Loneliness and a sense of feeling lost can in many ways be extremely painful and difficult to deal with at best. However, these feelings can also serve as a catalyst for change in our lives if we acknowledge them and act.

Above anything, cherish your mental well being and don’t underestimate its worth. Seek professional guidance if you’re unable to distinguish between a sense of freedom for yourself and a sense of despair.

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Featured photo credit: Andrew Neel via unsplash.com

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