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Your Voice of Temptation Doesn’t Need To Be In Charge

Your Voice of Temptation Doesn’t Need To Be In Charge

There are two prominent, and distinct voices inside my head. No, I am not suggesting that I suffer from a multiple personality disorder. Rather when it comes to motivation, it seems that we are all in a tug-of-war between opposing objectives. We want to lose weight, but there is a voice that says, “Just eat that one slice of chocolate cake.” We may feel guilty for a short time afterwards, but in the end, we will eat that cake again if given a chance.

There is a constant struggle between these two voices, the one that knows what is good for us, and the other that tempts us to sabotage our success. I have tried ignoring it, even reasoning with this other voice, but to no avail. The only thing I did try, and that worked, was making up my mind about which of the two voices was in charge.

Who’s Really The Boss Here?

I decided that the Voice of Good should be in the control seat. This doesn’t mean of course that the Voice of Temptation is going to go silently into the night. Mine put up a fierce fight. In fact, it seems never to stop fighting back. But, because I have made the decision, I use the Voice of Good to tell that Voice of Temptation where to get off.

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As ridiculous, and as slightly mad as it sounds, I now catch the times when the Voice of Temptation goes into another ramble about excuses to not go to the gym and workout — and then tell it where it gets off. This seems to work. “Listen here Voice of Temptation, I get what you are trying to do, but you are not in charge here, I, the Voice of Good say we are going to go to the gym whether you like it or not!”

The Two Voices, As Old As Time

Telling that Voice of Temptation where to get off, and putting it in its place, has nothing to do with motivation, but everything to do with discipline. The truth is, you cannot practice motivation, but what you can practice is discipline. It takes discipline, to allow that Voice of Good to stand up and proclaim who is running the show.

Like Marcus Aurelius, Emperor of Rome and Stoic philosopher, points out in his influential book, Meditations,

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“At dawn, when you have trouble getting out of bed, tell yourself: “I have to go to work – as a human being. What do I have to complain of, If I’m going to do what I was born for – the things I was brought into the world to do? Or is this what I was created for? To huddle under the blankets and stay warm?”

– But it’s nicer here…

So you were born to feel “nice”? Instead of doing things and experiencing them? Don’t you see the plants, the birds, the ants and spiders and bees going about their individual tasks, putting the world in order, as best they can? And you’re not willing to do your job as a human being? Why aren’t you running to do what your nature demands?

– But we have to sleep sometime…

Agreed. But nature set a limit on that – as it did on eating and drinking. And you’re over the limit. You’ve had more than enough of that. But not of working. There you’re still below your quota.

You don’t love yourself enough. Or you’d love your nature too, and what it demands of you. People who love what they do wear themselves down doing it, they even forget to wash or eat. Do you have less respect for your own nature than the engraver does for engraving, the dancer for the dance, the miser for money or the social climber for status? When they’re really possessed by what they do, they’d rather stop eating and sleeping than give up practicing their arts.”

Aurelius points to the discipline required to get things done. He also seems to be having that damned conversation between the Voice of Good and the Voice of Temptation that we all do. Clearly, those two voices have been around for eternity. The bottom line is, if you rely solely on the ‘desire’ to do something, then most of us would rather remain “huddled under the blankets and stay warm.” You have to put up the good fight, allow the Voice of Good to take charge, and don’t be afraid to tell the Voice of Temptation where to get off. And often, you need to tell it repeatedly!

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Rodney King

Embodied Performance Coach

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Last Updated on March 31, 2020

How To Break the Procrastination Cycle

How To Break the Procrastination Cycle

How often do you find yourself procrastinating? Do you wish you could procrastinate less? We all know how debilitating procrastination can make us feel, and it seems to be a challenge we all share. Procrastination is one of the biggest hindrances to moving forward and doing the things that we want to in life.

There are many reasons why you might be procrastinating, and sometimes, it is really difficult to pinpoint why. You might be procrastinating because of something related to the past, present, or future (they are all intertwined), or it could be as simple as biological factors. Whatever the reason, most of us follow a cycle when we procrastinate, from the moment we decide to do something to actually getting it done, or in this case, not getting it done.

The Vicious Procrastination Cycle

For some reason, it helps to understand that we all go through the same thing, even though we often feel like the only person in the world who struggles with this. Do you resonate with the cycle below?

1. Feeling Eager and Energized

This is when you commit to taking a new action or getting something done. You are feeling confident and optimistic that, this time round, you will do it!

2. Apprehension Starts to Come Up

The beginning stages of optimism are starting to fade. There is still time, but you haven’t done anything yet, and you start to feel uneasy. You realize that you actually have to do something to get it done, and that good intentions are not enough.

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3. Still No Action

More time has passed. You still haven’t taken any action and probably have a lot of excuses why. You start to panic a little and wish you had started sooner. Your panic starts to turn into frustration and perhaps even irritability.

4. Flicker of Hope Left

You can still make it; there is a little time left and you ponder how you are going to get it done. The rush you get from leaving your task until the last minute gives you a flicker of hope. There is still time; you can do this!

5. Fading Quickly

Your hope starts to quickly fade as you try desperately to understand why you just can’t do this. You may feel desperate and have thoughts like, “What is wrong with me?” and “Why do I ALWAYS do this?” You feel discouraged, or perhaps angry and resentful at yourself.

6. Vow to Yourself

Once the feeling of anger or disappointment disappears, you most likely swear to yourself that this will never happen again; that this was the last time and next time will be different.

Does this sound like you? Is the next time different? I understand the devastating effect that procrastination has on many lives, and for some, it is a really serious problem. You also have, on the other hand, those who procrastinate but it doesn’t affect them in any way. You know whether it is affecting you or not and whether it undermines your results.

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How to Break the Procrastination Cycle

Unless you break the cycle, you will keep reinforcing it!

To break the cycle, you need to change the sequence of events. Here is my suggestion on how you can effectively break the vicious cycle you are in!

1. Feeling Eager and Energized

This is when you commit to taking a new action or getting something done. You are feeling confident and optimistic that, this time round, you will do it! The first stage is always the same.

2. Plan

Thinking alone will not help; you need to plan your actions. I always put my deadlines one or two days in advance because you know Murphy’s Law! Take into consideration everything that you need to do, how long it will take you, and what you will need to get it done, then plan the individual steps.

3. Resistance

Just because you planned doesn’t mean that this time is guaranteed to be different. You will most likely still feel the resistance so expect this. This stage is key to identifying why you are procrastinating, so when you feel the resistance, try to identify it immediately.

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What is causing you to hesitate in this moment? What do you feel?  Write them down if it helps.

4. Confront Those Feelings

Once you have identified what could possibly be holding you back, for example, fear of failure, lack of motivation, etc. You need to work on lessening the resistance.

Ask yourself, “What do I need to do to move forward? What would make it easier?” If you find that you fear something, overcoming that fear is not something that will happen overnight — keep this in mind.

5. Put Results Before Comfort

You need to keep moving forward and put results before comfort. Take action, even if it is only for 10 minutes. The key is to break the cycle and not reinforce it. You have more control that you think.

6. Repeat

Repeat steps 3-5 until you achieve what you first set out to do.

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Final Thoughts

Change doesn’t happen overnight, and if you have some deeper underlying reasons why you procrastinate, it may take longer to finally break the cycle.

If procrastination is holding you back in life, it is better to deal with it now than to deal with the negative consequences later on. It is not a question of comfort anymore; it is a question of results. What is more important to you?

Learn more about how to stop procrastinating here: What Is Procrastination and How to Stop It (The Complete Guide)

Featured photo credit: Luke Chesser via unsplash.com

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