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Don’t Feel Hurt When Others Say “You’re Weird”, Take It As A Compliment Instead

Don’t Feel Hurt When Others Say “You’re Weird”, Take It As A Compliment Instead

Have you ever been called “weird?”  What exactly does that mean?

Usually when someone refers to you as weird, it conjures up negative feelings. You are being told that you are odd, different and that you don’t fit the conventional norms of the day. We are taught early in life that being different is social suicide and going off the quintessential “beaten path” is choosing a life of solitude and ridicule.

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I’ve been blessed to have worn the “weird” label my whole life. And the truth is–I am weird. I have weird views on life, finances and romance. I march to the beat of my own drum and forge my own paths where none previously existed. In short, I am extremely proud and honored to be called “weird.”

“So you’re a little weird? Work it! A little different? OWN it! Better to be a nerd than one of the herd!”~Mandy Hale

Society has conditioned us to be conformist. When you are called weird instead of hearing an insult, you should understand that you have just been paid one of the highest compliments. You have just been told that you are unique, bold, daring, exceptional, authentic and that you are special. Weird people think differently and choose to respond to the world around them differently – they own their individuality. It takes courage to go against the grain and to choose a distinct path in life.

Weird people are divergent thinkers

Being able to see the world, problems and situations from a perspective that is unique from the masses is truly a gift. When you are younger it does cause you a lot of problems. As a child, I’m guessing that your inquisitiveness – like mine – was mistakenly viewed as being obstinate, and difficult and efforts were made to quickly stamp out that “perverse” thinking before it could infect the others. In school, unfortunately we are taught what to think and not how to think for ourselves.

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Divergent thinkers are the ones who change the world. Throughout history, most of our true heroes had views that were directly opposed to the popular opinion of their day. They stood – many times alone – and championed their cause with or without help from others. Being able to see the world through a different set of lenses enables you a unique vantage point and the ability to attack problems and issues in away that no one else can. Your one weird idea could be the catalyst for change this world needs – don’t be tricked into conforming.

Being Weird is a superpower

The ability to own being weird gives you the power to accept the dare. The world throws so much at us and many times ordinary people live ordinary lives because they do not dare rise to the challenge. And this doesn’t mean (although it could) solving world hunger or putting an end to violence forever. Daring behavior shows up in our day-to-day thinking about small things. It is displayed in how we think and respond to political decisions, how we raise our children or how we make financial decisions.

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My husband and I were married very young and we decided that we wanted to live a life without debt or with very little debt. So our first small step was the decision not to use credit cards to make any purchases. When we shared our new endeavor with our loved ones we were patted on the head and told that it was an impossible and very impractical way to live. We were informed that you HAD to have a credit card to travel, rent cars and conduct certain types of business–no two ways about it–it just wasn’t doable in today’s society. My husband and I listened carefully to the advice of our well meaning friends and family and we quietly accepted the dare.

Twenty years later we are still credit card free, have traveled all over the world and rent cars regularly. The most phenomenal part about the whole process is the dare taught us how to be fiscally responsible, set us up for a very early retirement, helped my husband choose his career (he’s an accountant) and given us the ability to counsel others financially. The genesis of our financial success began with a simple dare.

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More by this author

Denise Hill

Denise shares about psychology and communication tips on Lifehack.

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Last Updated on October 17, 2019

How to Spend More Quality Time with Your Partner

How to Spend More Quality Time with Your Partner

You see your partner every single day. They are the first person you talk to in the morning and the last person you kiss goodnight.

But does seeing each other day in and day out equal a healthy relationship? Not necessarily.

Spending quality time with your partner is the best way to ensure your relationship stays healthy and strong. This means going above and beyond sitting together while you watch Netflix or going out for the occasional dinner. You deserve more from your relationship – and so does your spouse!

What does quality time mean? It means spending time with your spouse without interruption. It’s a chance for you to come together and talk. Communication will build emotional intimacy and trust.

Quality time is also about expressing love in a physical way. Not sex, necessarily (but that’s great, too!) but through hand-holding, cuddling, caressing, and tickling. Studies show that these displays of affection will boost partner satisfaction.[1]

So how do you spend quality time with your partner? Here are 13 relationship tips on making the most out of your time with your partner.

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1. Recognize the Signs

If you want a healthy relationship, you have to learn how to recognize the signs that you need to spend more quality time together.

Some telltale signs include:

  • You’re always on your phones.
  • You value friendships or hobbies over quality time with your spouse.
  • You aren’t together during important events.
  • You are arguing more often or lack connection.
  • You don’t make plans or date nights.
  • You’re not happy.

If you are experiencing any of these relationship symptoms, know that quality time together can reverse the negative effects of the signs above.

2. Try New Things Together

Have you ever wanted to learn how to play an instrument or speak another language? How about skydive or ballroom dance?

Instead of viewing these as solo hobbies and interests, why not involve your partner?

Trying new activities together builds healthy relationships because it encourages spouses to rely on one another for emotional and physical support.

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Shared hobbies also promote marital friendship, and the Journal of Happiness Studies found that marital satisfaction was twice as high for couples who viewed each other as best friends.[2]

3. Schedule in Tech-Free Time

Your phone is a great way to listen to music, watch videos, and keep up-to-date with friends and family. But is your phone good for your relationship?

Many couples phone snub, or ‘phub’, one another. Studies show that phubbing can lower relationship satisfaction and increase one’s chances of depression.[3]

Reduce those chances by removing distractions when spending quality time together and showing your partner they have your full attention.

4. Hit the Gym as a Couple

One way you can spend more time together as a couple is by becoming workout partners. Studies show that couples are more likely to stay with their exercise routine if they work out together.[4] Couples also work out harder than they would solo. One study found that 95 percent of couples who work out together maintained weight loss compares to the 66 percent of singles who did.[5]

Join a gym, do at-home couples’ workouts, try couples yoga, hit the hiking trails, or get your bikes out. No matter which way you choose to exercise, these healthy activities can promote a healthy relationship.

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5. Cook Meals Together

Pop open a bottle of wine or put some romantic music on while you get busy – in the kitchen, of course!

One of the best relationship tips for spending quality time together when you both have busy schedules is to cook meals together.[6]

Spice things up and try and prepare a four-course meal or a fancy French dish together. Not only is this a fun way to spend your time together, but it also promotes teamwork.

If all goes well, you’ll have a romantic date night meal at home that you prepared with your four hands. And if the food didn’t turn out the way you’d hoped, you are guaranteed to have a laugh and create new memories together.

6. Have a Regular Date Night

Couples experience a greater sense of happiness and less stress when they are spending quality time together.[7] One of the biggest relationship tips for a healthy partnership is to include a date night in your weekly routine.

The National Marriage Project found that having a weekly date night can make your relationship seem more exciting and helps prevent relationship boredom.[8] It also lowers the probability of divorce, improves your sex life, and increases healthy communication.

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Some great ideas for what to do on your date night include:

  • Have a movie marathon – Gather up your favorite flicks and cuddle up on the couch.
  • Play games together – Cards, board games, video games, and other creative outlets are a fun way to spend quality time together.
  • Recreate your first date – Go back to that restaurant and order the same meal you did when you first got together. You can spice up your evening by pretending you’re strangers meeting for the first time and see how sexy the night gets.
  • Plan a weekend getaway – There’s nothing better than traveling with the one you love.
  • Dinner and a movie – A classic!
  • Try a new restaurant – Make it your mission to rate and try all of the Mexican restaurants/Irish pubs/Italian trattorias in your area.
  • Have a long sex session – Intimacy promotes the release of the oxytocin hormone which is responsible for a myriad of great feelings.[9]

Here’re even more date night ideas for your reference: 50 Unique and Really Fun Date Ideas for Couples

Final Thoughts

The benefits of spending quality time together are endless. Here are just some of the ways it can contribute to a healthy relationship:

  • Improves emotional and physical intimacy
  • Lowers divorce rates
  • Improves communication
  • Reduces marital boredom
  • Bonds couples closer
  • Improves friendship
  • Boosts health
  • Reduces stress

These are all excellent reasons to start making date night a regular part of your week.

It’s easy to have a healthy relationship when you set aside dedicated time to share with your spouse. Try new things together, make your spouse your workout buddy, and look for innovative ways to be close and connected.

These relationship tips will bring great benefits to your marriage.

Featured photo credit: Allen Taylor via unsplash.com

Reference

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