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20 Things Every Woman in Their 20’s Should Do

20 Things Every Woman in Their 20’s Should Do

The 20’s are a time to make mistakes, learn, love, have fun, and adventure. They are a time to thrive to for us to get to know ourselves. They are a mess, but the mess is so beautiful. Nothing will ruin your 20’s more than thinking you should have your life together already.

1. Make out with a beautiful asshole.

Beautiful people are fun to make out with. Assholes are not fun to date. Have fun, and be done.

2. Travel alone.

You don’t have to fly out of the country for this one. You know that city you have always wanted to explore? Buy a plane ticket or hop in your car and go check it out! Go stay in a cabin and take a solitude weekend. Spend time getting to know yourself. See what you like to do when the only agenda that you have to be concerned with is your own.

What gets you excited? Notice how you feel throughout the day when you get to make all the decisions. Take what you learn and apply it to your every day life. Do more of what makes you happy, and less of what does not. Big bonus: The confidence you get from being independent and doing things alone is huge.

3. Get a nice set of PJs.

Why? Because you deserve it. Take care of yourself. Lounge around and look cute- just for you.

4. Ask your crush out.

Let’s be real. If you are in your 20’s and reading this you know by now that men are not the chivalrous, confident princes that Disney makes them out to be. We are living in an incredible time where gender roles are changing. Take your love life into your own hands— don’t wait around for a guy to ask you out because he probably wont. Don’t be afraid to make the first move because you are smart, strong, funny, and beautiful!

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5. Go commando for a day.

You will find yourself smiling all day long because you have a little secret that no one else knows.

6. Say “I love you” first.

They are three words that carry a lot of vulnerability. Saying I love you and meaning it opens up doors to go deeper into a relationship. This doesn’t apply to just romantic relationships, but to friendships too. Allow yourself to be vulnerable and see the magic that comes from that beautiful space you create. Say “I love you,” and say it a lot.

7. Quit your job.

Stop doing something that makes you miserable just for money.

8. Cultivate creativity.

Sign up for a pottery class. Do a paint and sip night. Practice hand-lettering. Cut out your coupons and go to the craft store to start a new project. Re-arrange your apartment. Paint your walls. Pick flowers. Sketch on a napkin. Left brain is logic, right is creativity. Get out of your left brain and into your right brain.

9. Journal.

Journal because you need to figure it out. Journal because you want to remember. Journal because you think you have a lot to say (you do!). Journal because you are funny. Journal because you have dreams. Journal because it is good for you.

According to an article in the Huffington Post, journaling can help raise your IQ, evoke mindfulness, help achieve goals, boost memory and comprehension, expand your emotional intelligence, improve communication, strengthen self discipline, spark creativity, foster healing, and build self confidence.

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10. Drink water.

You cannot argue with this one. Get a water bottle and make that water bottle your best friend. Water flushes out the system, helps you feel energized, plays a role in maintaining a healthy weight, is good for your skin, and it helps your body function. Water makes your body feel good and work to its fullest potential.

11. Make time for self-love.

Sometimes we get caught up trying to save the world. Saving the world begins with taking care of yourself. Imagine what the world would be like if everyone spent an hour everyday loving themselves.

12. Spend time volunteering.

Through volunteering you are exposed to new experiences and different demographics you may not have encountered otherwise. You don’t have to fly to Africa, just go to your nearest food bank or volunteer at your local library. Ask yourself what you can give to the world and then give it.

“Happiness is not having a lot. Happiness is giving a lot.” – Buddha

13. Get off social media.

Get off social media for a week and see how much more connected you feel with the real world, not the world you see happening through a screen. 

14. Get out in the woods.

Everybody needs beauty as well as bread, places to play in and pray in, where nature may heal and give strength to body and soul.” – John Muir

We often associate the woods with quiet, but there are still a lot of sounds- birds, animals, water, and insects. What happens is that when we are in the woods our minds become quieter.

15. Make peace with your body.

And I said to my body- softly- ‘I want to be your friend.’ it took a long breath, and replied ‘I have been waiting my whole life for this.” – Nayyiah Waheed

The body is not an extension of the mind to be configured how you think it should look. Your body and mind are not separate. You are one unique, beautiful being. Your body is what carries you where you go, it is home to a life, be gentle with it.

16. Don’t spend money for a week.

Spend a Saturday splurging out at the grocery store, filling your car up with gas, paying bills and getting a little treat (of course!). Then Sunday to Sunday you save. It feels so good: one week of saving will make you aware of your spending habits and help you realize all the amazing free stuff in your life.

17. Forgive.

In the words of the amazing role model and feminist leader Cheryl Strayed: “You will come to know things that can only be known with the wisdom of age and the grace of years. Most of those things will have to do with forgiveness.” Forgiveness isn’t always the clean mess free process we want it to be. It is messy. It is hard. Forgiveness takes time. Forgiveness means not sweeping something under the rug, rather taking the hurt and pain and working with it and getting messy and dirty and then let it go, sweeping it out the door.

18. Go skinny dipping.

Why? Just for fun! And in the words of Ernest Hemingway, “When you stop doing things for fun you might as well be dead.”

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19. Ditch the meal plan.

Gluten free? Dairy-free? Yo-yo dieting? No amount of carrots of celery is going to satisfy you when you just want a piece of chocolate. Eat the piece of chocolate- just don’t eat so much that your stomach hurts. Eat what makes you feel good. Enjoy your food.

20. Go with it.

Sometimes we make a choice and it ends up being an amazing adventure and sometimes it ends up being a big mistake. Just remember – maybe you are face-palming but you are not face-planting. Mistakes happen and often they lead to the most amazing self-discovery and a path you did not even know existed.

Take a second to think: where you would be if everything you ever wanted had turned out exactly right? Everything is constantly changing — go with it. Listen to your gut – research says that women have stronger instincts than men – own that!

Featured photo credit: Favim via Favim.com

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Last Updated on September 17, 2018

Why Do I Have Bad Luck? 2 Simple Things to Change Your Destiny

Why Do I Have Bad Luck? 2 Simple Things to Change Your Destiny

Are you one of those people who are always suffering setbacks? Does little ever seem to go right for you? Do you sometimes feel that the universe is out to get you? Do you wonder:

Why do I have bad luck?

Let me let you into a secret:

Your luck is no worse—and no better—than anyone else’s. It just feels that way. Better still, there are two simple things you can do which will reverse your feelings of being unlucky.

1. Stop believing that what happens in your life is down to the vagaries of luck, destiny, supernatural forces, malevolent other people, or anything else outside your self.

Psychologists call this “external locus of control.” It’s a kind of fatalism, where people believe that they can do little or nothing personally to change their lives.

Because of this, they either merely hope for the best, focus on trying to change their luck by various kinds of superstition, or submit passively to whatever comes—while complaining that it doesn’t match their hopes.

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Most successful people take the opposite view. They have “internal locus of control.” They believe that what happens in their life is nearly all down to them; and that even when chance events occur, what is important is not the event itself, but how you respond to it.

This makes them pro-active, engaged, ready to try new things, and keen to find the means to change whatever in their lives they don’t like.

They aren’t fatalistic and they don’t blame bad luck for what isn’t right in their world. They look for a way to make things better.

Are they luckier than the others? Of course not.

Luck is random—that’s what chance means—so they are just as likely to suffer setbacks as anyone else.

What’s different is their response. When things go wrong, they quickly look for ways to put them right. They don’t whine, pity themselves, or complain about “bad luck.” They try to learn from what happened to avoid or correct it next time and get on with living their life as best they can.

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No one is habitually luckier or unluckier than anyone else. It may seem so, over the short term (Random events often come in groups, just as random numbers often lie close together for several instances—which is why gamblers tend to see patterns where none exist).

When you take a longer perspective, random chance is just . . . random. Yet those who feel that they are less lucky, typically pay far more attention to short-term instances of bad luck, convincing themselves of the correctness of their belief.

Your locus of control isn’t genetic. You learned it somehow. If it isn’t working for you, change it.

2. Remember that whatever you pay attention to grows in your mind.

If you focus on what’s going wrong in your life—especially if you see it as “bad luck” you can do nothing about—it will seem blacker and more malevolent.

In a short time, you’ll become so convinced that everything is against you that you’ll notice more and more instances where this appears to be true. As a result, you will almost certainly stop trying, convinced that nothing you can do will improve your prospects.

Fatalism feeds on itself until people become passive “victims” of life’s blows. The “losers” in life are those who are convinced they will fail before they start anything; sure that their “bad luck” will ruin any prospects of success.

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They rarely notice that the true reasons for their failure are ignorance, laziness, lack of skill, lack of forethought, or just plain foolishness—all of which they could do something to correct, if only they would stop blaming other people or “bad luck” for their personal deficiencies.

Your attention is under your control. Send it where you want it to go. Starve the negative thoughts until they die.

To improve your fortune, first decide that what happens is nearly always down to you; then try focusing on what works and what turns out well, not the bad stuff.

Your “fate” really does depend on the choices that you make. When random events happen, as they always will, do you choose to try to turn them to your advantage or just complain about them?

Thomas Jefferson is said to have used these words:

“I’m a great believer in luck and I find the harder I work, the more I have of it.”

Ralph Waldo Emerson said:

“Shallow men believe in luck. Strong men believe in cause and effect.”

Your luck, in the end, is pretty much what you choose it to be.

Featured photo credit: LoboStudio Hamburg via unsplash.com

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