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You Are Not the Only One Heartbroken

You Are Not the Only One Heartbroken

Hey!

Feeling heartbroken?

Feeling like a complete stranger to the world?

I know how it feels, but you are not the only one. We have all been there. To each one of us, the pain was as real and as excruciating as it is to you now.

And it doesn’t matter where you are from, whether you are a boy or a girl, in your twenties or your sixties, there is really nothing more painful than the feeling of a broken heart. The riot of emotions is immense and intolerable.

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    I have been there.

    I remember the times.I was twenty five and jubilant. I was dreaming of the rest of my life. It seemed to me that the next forty to fifty years of my life was going to be perfect. I was with the perfect person, in the perfect job – it was a beautiful picture.

    Then everything changed in one day. I can never forget that day. It is still so vivid. The pain was so real, so excruciating, so intense! I felt as if the slate was wiped clean all of a sudden, you know. The future was uncertain again. I did not know where to go and which way to look. I felt like I had lost a part of my soul.

    It seemed irrevocable. I ran to my closest friends. They tried, but the pain was just not going away; it was increasing every moment. Every song I heard seemed to be written about me. Every movie somehow reminded me of the amazing times I have had. It seemed that the accumulated wealth of my dreams had simply vaporized into thin air. And I did not know if I could ever build that dream again.

    More than losing the person from your life you get shattered to have lost those dreams, those imaginations. I am not a weak person. I am in command of an ocean liner and I am not allowed to be vulnerable. Being a mariner I have lived through some of the toughest situations imaginable. And not one of them even remotely came close to what I felt at that time. No one is immune.

    We often don’t realize how much we invest in a person or a feeling unless it leaves us. We take people for granted. At times, we tend to overlook the obvious signs that could tell us it’s not worth the investment. In short there is this blinding light covering the word “love”. If that shatters, it is a lost feeling.

    Whatever it is, it isn’t easy. People have gone crazy over this!! I know how you feel right now.

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      But regardless of how heartbroken you are, know this – even this has a silver lining.

      Life has a strange pattern to itself. Throw it away in a trash can, and more often than not, it will still get rearranged. Even when you do not believe in life, do not trust yourself, that little lump of muscle beating inside you always gives hope. You may not believe in it now, but, eventually you will know.

      This too, shall pass away. 

      Every pain, every sorrow and every grief comes with an expiry date.

      Years later, today, I stand tall, with a great job, a beautiful wife and a great life with very few regrets and no pain. Time eventually healed me. There were people in my life to thank for it too. But, just like an unwelcome guest, your pain goes away one day and it takes that feeling of being heartbroken along with it.

      It usually starts with a feeling where you feel stupid about a lot of things and either learn to eventually laugh at them or take some lessons out. It has been years now. My pain is long gone, but the memories stay.

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      The transformation of the heartbroken

      But there are a few very interesting things that happens at the end of that tunnel.

      When I look back, I thank God for taking away that part of my life to make way for something else, way better. Life as I said earlier, did fall in place. Had I not moved out and moved on, perhaps my future would not seem so great as it does now.

      No, you will not hold on to this pain forever. You will learn to come to terms and make peace with it. It’s really not even important whether you believe me when I say this, it will still happen regardless.

      Also, just like steel when forged, that excruciatingly painful experience you go through, changes a few things in you.

      1. You will never feel this much agony again. The pain of being heartbroken is like vaccination, it protects you from a second round of the same.
      2. You will understand people much more from today. Try not to get too skeptical though. Do not judge everyone by the same yardstick. I lost a few relationships from such mistakes.
      3. When you do find the person you love, you will never take him or her for granted.

      I thank the Lord every day, to be able to love someone so beautiful as my wife. I try to work on my relationships every day, to make them better. No, not because I am a great guy or something.I have learned to value what I have!!

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        How do you handle this day?

        It’s a difficult day today. No matter what I say or anyone else does, it isn’t going to ease that gut-wrenching anguish inside you. The feeling of being heartbroken will take some time to heal.

        Do not be worried about what will happen to you a year from now. You will be fine. Just plan how you will survive today. Handle life in bits and pieces. Try to stay with people you love, friends who really care and have been through this before.

        Cry if you want to, and as much as you want to. It’s okay to cry. Get busy, like really really busy!! Take every moment bit by bit. Only the next few days will be difficult.

        I repeat myself  – this too, shall pass away. And when it does, you will be a person reborn with the ability to turn back and look at life in its face.

        Featured photo credit: Free Images.com via freeimages.com

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        Last Updated on February 12, 2019

        12 Things That May Cause Breast Cancer You Should Avoid

        12 Things That May Cause Breast Cancer You Should Avoid

        I’m a hypochondriac. Always have been since I was a child. One of my biggest fears as an adult is getting breast cancer. I visited my gynecologist a few months ago and asked what I could do to help prevent getting breast cancer. You know what she said? Nothing. According to this recommended OB/GYN doctor, besides regular check-ups to see if I already had breast cancer, there was nothing I could do to prevent a cancer that impacts 1 in 8 U.S. women.

        BS.

        After heavily researching breast cancer, I found out that I was making quite a few mistakes with my everyday activities. Here are 12 things that may cause breast cancer that you should avoid.

        Buying Deodorant Without Checking the Label

        I actually have a good friend who is more of a hypochondriac than I am, so I went to her with my concerns about breast cancer. She took me into the bathroom and thrust her deodorant at me. While at first I was confused and slightly offended, she explained that I should start using a different deodorant because the mass-produced ones at the store have ingredients (ie aluminum –based compounds) I can’t afford to put under my armpits and so close to my breasts. Luckily, she had an extra Tom’s natural deodorant to give me.

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        There might not be any “conclusive” research that links antiperspirants to breast cancer but better safe than sorry.

        Using Chemical Hair Dye

        I know so many people who dye their hair every few months using the cheap boxed dyes you can buy at the store. Sure, it can be fun but it’s like playing Russian Roulette because the dyes you use most likely contain carcinogens. The National Cancer Institute even warns against the practice of just picking out a hair dye willy-nilly. So the next time you do it, go to a health foods market and find the most naturally-based hair dye you can.

        Smoking

        Regarding my visit to the gynecologist, she did come back after our conversation a few minutes later and asked if I smoked or drank a lot of alcohol. I said no (I don’t think any true hypochondriac can do either of those things). “You’ll be fine then,” she said. But she forgot about second-hand smoke, which can be just as dangerous. Now, I won’t go near anyone if they’re lighting up, including my BFF’s boyfriend. He can get as mad as he wants; my health is more important!

        Wearing the Wrong Bra Size

        When an organization devoted to protecting women against breast cancer suggests you get fitted with the right bra, you take notice. Bras that are too small or big might pose a risk because they just aren’t supportive on the breast tissue or if they are too tight they will cut off drainage of the lymph fluid. Hey, it was a great excuse to head to Victoria’s Secret to get measured.

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        If I had my choice though, I would go all-natural and join the bra burners of the 60s (however, my mom was a bra burner, so that might make it a little awkward).

        Using Chemical Household Cleaners

        If the cabinet under your kitchen sink looks like most, there are enough chemicals to make all sorts of crazy things. And yes, as you and I suspected, those chemicals are REALLY bad. Not only are they connected with breast cancer, they are connected with other kinds of cancers, as well as chronic conditions like migraines, allergies and more. So from now on, clean with vinegar, baking soda and other materials that aren’t going to give you a medical nightmare.

        Using Mothballs

        When I was a little kid, I learned to use mothballs. They actually remind me of my grandmother, bless her heart. Little did I know that they are filled with chemicals that have been connected with breast cancer development. Looks like I’ll be looking for an alternative, like cedar chips. Sorry, Grammy!

        Putting Non-Organic Make-Up on My Face

        I won’t tell you the foundation I use, but I will tell you that after I read the ingredients, I promptly threw it away. It was chock full of all sorts of nasty things like parabens, which have been found en masse in tissue samples that came from breast cancer patients. I can still wear make-up, though. A trip to my local whole foods store was all it took to come up with organic-based, paraben-free cover-up.

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        Neglecting My Physical Health

        In my research, I discovered losing weight is a good way to ward off breast cancer since there have been indications of a link between being overweight and being diagnosed with this type of cancer. That’s all the motivation I need to get off the couch and head to the gym.

        Drinking Alcohol

        Like I mentioned above, alcohol has never been my drink of choice but basically everyone else I know highly enjoys their beer. Yet alcohol is super problematic if you want to avoid breast cancer, liver cancer and heart cancer. In a global study, over 21 percent of alcohol related deaths were because of cancer. I’m hoping for a soon-to-be revolution that swaps alcohol for tea (healthier and less expensive) when it comes to social drinking. Tea time anyone?

        De-Odorizing My House With Air Fresheners

        I love a clean-smelling house and car, but the air fresheners I’ve been using contain phthalates, a type of plasticizing chemical. Phthalates have been found in air fresheners because they help create a long-lasting fragrance. Unfortunately, that fragrance could be deadly. Looks like I’ll be boiling some water, cinnamon sticks and cloves on the stovetop to make my house smell really amazing!

        Storing Everything in Plastic Containers

        I have a habit of collecting those plastic containers. Whenever I get a coupon for them, I just go hog-wild and buy a bunch. But they have a connection to breast cancer, which I didn’t know before. It’s especially bad when you use them to reheat food in the microwave. I’m going to suck it up, throw them out and use glass containers instead.

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        Buying the Wrong Food

        I figured that pesticides were trouble from the get-go, and I was right. They get into your foods and, in some cases, seem to foster an environment where cancerous cells feel compelled to grow within the organs and tissues, including the breasts. It’s one more reason to buy from local farmers, as long as they don’t use pesticides. You’ll have to ask them, by the way; most local food market stands don’t have signs up about the whole pesticides topic.

        While everyone still makes fun of me for being a hypochondriac, I know in my heart that I’m actually just protecting myself, and maybe educating some people on the health dangers that lurk in everyday items. My wellbeing is worth being the butt of a few jokes. Yours is, too.

        Featured photo credit: NA via istockphoto.com

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