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Sometimes You Have To Let Go Even If You Still Love The Person

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Sometimes You Have To Let Go Even If You Still Love The Person

The process of letting go of someone you love is one of life’s most painful experiences. When you have invested a considerable amount of time and emotional energy in someone, the prospect of living without them may be unthinkable. You may look back on the memories you shared, the plans you made, and feel nothing but psychic agony. If you are newly broken up, envisaging a new future may feel close to impossible. You may find yourself ruminating on what you could have done differently, the arguments you may have had, and the things you regret saying.

Every relationship is unique, and there are many reasons why cutting ties may be the kindest solution for all parties. Maybe you discovered as time went on that your values and dreams did not align. At first you may have hoped that you could overcome your differences, but in the end they drove you apart. Sometimes, love just isn’t enough and you come to the sad conclusion that it’s time to part ways. Perhaps you love one another and even revel in your differences, but seem unable to communicate or resolve conflict. Maybe you had to end the relationship for another reason entirely. Whatever the trigger, the emotional fallout will be considerable. This is completely normal. Be kind to yourself, and expect a period of emotional turbulence.

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What are you really releasing when you let go?

Letting go of a person involves letting go of hope. We may have believed this person to be our soulmate, or at least someone upon whom we could rely to stick around for a long time. It can be tremendously difficult to face the stark reality that we need to carve out a new path for ourselves, and allow the other person to do the same. You may be feeling lonely, even when surrounded by friends and family who want to comfort you. If you can, allow yourself to be nourished by their support.

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Taking the momentous decision to let go of someone you love is a brave step. In doing so, you are proving to yourself that you are capable of creating your own happiness, and that you do not need to rely on someone else to make you feel as though life is worth living. In evaluating your relationship, deciding that you would be best off apart and then letting them go, you are demonstrating that you have faith in the universe. When you summon the courage to move on from a relationship that isn’t working, you are affirming that you are worthy of the best life has to offer, and that you are confident that with time you can move on to a more constructive relationship.

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Why letting go can herald a beautiful new beginning

Letting go of harmful relationships allows you to move forwards a brighter future. Remember the old saying, “If you love someone, let them go?” If you look deep within yourself, you will realize that in freeing yourself and the other person from a relationship that is holding you both back, you are helping two people to create a happier, more authentic life. In this way, letting go of someone you love can be an act of supreme care and kindness. Every relationship can teach us something, and occasionally the whole purpose of a relationship may come only when it ends. Although it may feel as though your world is ending when you break up with someone you love, over time you will realize that you are merely embarking on a new beginning. Let the lessons you have learned from your interactions with this person serve to guide you in forming healthier relationships in the future, and rest assured that you can and will find love again. See this painful period as a step closer to getting what you really need and want from life.

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Jay Hill

Jay writes about communication and happiness on Lifehack.

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