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Are Beautiful Women or Handsome Men Really More Confident Than Ordinary People?

Are Beautiful Women or Handsome Men Really More Confident Than Ordinary People?

True Confidence Isn’t an Appearance

“You can only be confident if you’re handsome”… Super helpful advice, right?

It’s astounding just how many people have fallen into this fallacy that handsome or beautiful people are the only confident people in the world. Why is it that society has focused solely on the aspect of physical beauty? Especially to assign a value on something that’s so absurdly vague? Think about it for a second, we take something that is generally only a person’s opinion, and then just base an aspect of life on it?

Absolutely bonkers. There’s a quote by Barrie Davenport, the writer and operator of Live Bold and Bloom. When it comes down to Self-Confidence and Beauty, she says:

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“True beauty is the flame of self-confidence shining from the inside out.”
– 
Barrie Davenport

Think about that for a moment. Beauty coming from within. Here’s a fact about that life that most individuals realize at different points. Physical beauty doesn’t last, it’s fleeting. So then let’s break this down, even if you have an absurd amount of money available to help maintain a sense of beauty in yourself, your good looks WILL in fact disappear, it’s a part of life! Why base your entire self-esteem on something that will eventually vanish? That isn’t confidence, it’s a fallacy as there’s nothing you can really do to make it last.

The truth is that most people who base their confidence on their looks are actually really don’t have confidence at all. “Everyone else needs to think i’m gorgeous or else I’m not good enough” is a very poor mindset to have. In fact, there are many celebrities that even with their good looks didn’t have any confidence for a long time. Here’s a truth…

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True Confidence isn’t Beauty

Many people believe that famous people are all looks and that’s why they achieved what they have. But there are quite a few celebrities that were quite shy before accomplishing the things they love to do. Bob Dylan, the famed folk singer for example. He was shy and not at all confident in his ability to play guitar or write songs, yet now he’s one of the most prolific musicians we have. Tina Fey and Tom Cruise as well. Both of them are massively famous actors, yet both suffered from not being confident for YEARS before either of them hit it big!

None of them changed their physical beauty when they became famous either. All that truly changed in their lives was that they went out and took on the world and won. They dreamed and dared to chase it! That’s a true basis of being confident, going after and doing what you love, even if it seems crazy.

So instead of basing your confidence on an opinion, try and rewire your brain a little bit. See the cool thing about life and psychology is that you have the ability to control your brain. The way you associate certain aspects of your life is a powerful concept. There was a reason that you decided to associate your confidence with other peoples beauty right? Instead of just associating it with something that’s just a loose concept, it’s time to build a solid foundation for yourself. It’s time to rethink your confidence.

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True Confidence Comes From Challenges and Passion

True confidence comes from two different things, challenges, and passions. People who have true confidence aren’t focused about how they look, but what they’re working on in life! The challenges people encounter in their lives are often viewed as just obstacles. But, think about how you feel as you overcome those challenges. During the period of stress, you’re unhappy, frustrated, and probably upset. But once you get over the hump, you tend to feel empowered right?

It almost makes you feel as if you can do anything, you look back at it later in life, and smile because you’ve come so far from those low points! Plus, the struggles happen periodically to just to make sure that you stay on your toes and keep moving forward. So here’s a crazy theory, what if those challenges are there to help inspire a definite sense of confidence in you? What if those barriers are there to not just challenge you, but inspire you to keep moving? Being able to be confident is more of a sense of being able to rely on yourself to take on each day.

So instead, base your confidence on your ability to handle challenges and come out on the other side. That way instead of having to gather other people’s opinions on who you are, you’ll have the knowledge in yourself. Plus, it’s useful feeling as if you made another notch in your belt after each challenge. That way you can feel as if the world just keeps re-certifying the knowledge that you can do anything. But that’s only half the equation.

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The other half is based more on personal fulfillment. It’s not enough alone to be able to rely on yourself. Confidence is also a matter of being content and happy with who you are and what you do. If the first half of the equation was to make sure that your mind feel challenged, the other half is to make sure that your heart is content.

The way you accomplish this is to build upon your own sense of happiness. How, you ask? Well, what are the things in your life that make you happy? What activities do you do in your world that when you’re done, you find yourself feeling happy and fulfilled? Do you have those things in your mind? Good, go do them! Those things in your life are your passions, they are the things that make you want to jump out of bed and shout.

If you don’t have those things, then that is simply your latest challenge. Finding your passions, finding your hobbies is integral to making sure you’re a confident individual. Confidence is part reliance, part fulfillment. Believing in yourself and being happy sounds a lot more valid than relying on the fleeting aspect of looks, doesn’t it?

So, that’s really what you need to increase your confidence, start challenging yourself, break from the norm. Life presents us with new opportunities every day, start taking them. Second, start discovering the things you love to do. If you’ve already got passions, awesome! It’s time to start building on them. Having a great life is dependent on being confident, and confidence comes from growing. You can read on How To Boost Your Self-Confidence in 5 Easy Steps.

Life = Growth. Now get out there and start living!

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Last Updated on September 17, 2019

10 Simple Ways To Always Think Positive Thoughts

10 Simple Ways To Always Think Positive Thoughts

Positive thinking can lead to a lot of positive change in your life. Developing an optimistic outlook can be good for both your physical and mental health.

But sometimes, certain situations arise in life that makes it hard to keep a positive outlook. Take steps to make positive thinking become more like your second nature and you’ll reap the biggest benefits.

Here are 10 ways to make thinking positive thoughts easy:

1. Spend Time with Positive People

If you surround yourself with constant complainers, their negativity is likely to rub off on you.

Spend time with positive friends and family members to increase the likelihood that their positive thinking habits will become yours too. It’s hard to be negative when everyone around you is so positive.

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2. Take Responsibility for Your Behavior

When you encounter problems and difficulties in life, don’t play the role of the victim. Acknowledge your role in the situation and take responsibility for your behavior.

Accepting responsibility can help you learn from mistakes and prevent you from blaming others unfairly.

3. Contribute to the Community

One of the best ways to feel good about what you have, is to focus on what you have to give.

Volunteer in some manner and give back to the community. Helping others can give you a new outlook on the world and can assist you with positive thinking.

4. Read Positive and Inspirational Materials

Spend time each day reading something that encourages positive thinking. Read the Bible, spiritual material, or inspirational quotes to help you focus on what’s important to you in life. It can be a great way to start and end your day.

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Some recommendations for you:

5. Recognize and Replace Negative Thoughts

You won’t be successful at positive thinking if you’re still plagued by frequent negative thoughts. Learn to recognize and replace thoughts that are overly negative. Often, thoughts that include words like “always” and “never” signal that they aren’t true.

If you find yourself thinking something such as, “I always mess everything up,” replace it with something more realistic such as, “Sometimes I make mistakes but I learn from them.”

There’s no need to make your thoughts unrealistically positive, but instead, make them more realistic.

6. Establish and Work Toward Goals

It’s easier to be positive about problems and setbacks when you have goals that you’re working toward. Goals will give you motivation to overcome those obstacles when you encounter problems along the way. Without clear goals, it’s harder to make decisions and gauge your progress.

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Learn to set SMART goals to help you achieve more.

7. Consider the Consequences of Negativity

Spend some time thinking about the consequences of negative thinking. Often, it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

For example, a person who thinks, “I probably won’t get this job interview,” may put less effort into the interview. As a result, he may decrease his chances of getting the job.

Create a list of all the ways negative thinking impacts your life. It likely influences your behavior, your relationships, and your feelings. Then, create a list of the ways in which positive thinking could be beneficial.

8. Offer Compliments to Others

Look for reasons to compliment others. Be genuine in your praise and compliments, but offer it frequently. This will help you look for the good in other people.

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9. Create a Daily Gratitude List

If you start keeping a daily gratitude list, you’ll start noticing exactly how much you have to be thankful for. This can help you focus on the positive in your life instead of thinking about all the bad things that have happened in the day.

Getting in the habit of showing an attitude of gratitude makes positive thinking more of a habit. Here’re 40 Simple Ways To Practice Gratitude.

10. Practice Self-Care

Take good care of yourself and you’ll be more equipped to think positively.

Get plenty of rest and exercise and practice managing your stress well. Taking care of your physical and mental health will provide you with more energy to focus on positive thinking.

Learn about these 30 Self-Care Habits for a Strong and Healthy Mind, Body and Spirit.

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Featured photo credit: DESIGNECOLOGIST via unsplash.com

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