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The Single Biggest Regret People Have In Their Lives

The Single Biggest Regret People Have In Their Lives

Have you been following your heart, or are you guilty of the thousands of people that will chalk their biggest regret as to not following through on what they’re passionate about? It is something that does not get spoken of enough, but many people end up sticking to the safe route in life as if it is the only path they know how to walk. They then forget what tingles their fiery sense of desire and regret not taking the small sliver of opportunity that was available to them at some point, and instead they find themselves stuck or complacent and missing out in a repentant state of mind. This idea of following the heart is difficult, but imagine the life you could be living if you gave in to the calling of your heart instead of the ‘norm’ life that society has ingrained into our heads.

People often get stuck where they are at. They live rather comfortably and don’t want to give that up. Usually it has to deal with monetary values, because whether we like to believe it or not, to pursue plenty of things there is a price. At the same time, there is the dichotomy that they are making money not doing what they love and instead just ‘getting by’. The most important step into not falling into the life of regret is finding the medium into which you can step outside that comfort level and let the unpredictable route of passion takes its hold over you. Otherwise, we get shackled to what we are not in love with, almost like having to carry around extra weight that pushes your passion and heart deep within yourself that it never sees the light of day.

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At one point I fell victim to not putting what my heart wanted first. I noticed it when someone asked what a day in the life of Sean was, and what I responded with was so stagnant that I snapped out of my zombie like, droning state and dropped that piece of my life off in a ditch and instead charted a map for my heart to follow and soar. I fell victim to the heavy work load of life and it felt monotonous enough that I do not think my happiness or career would be where it is now if I continued that old life. That being said, not following your heart will lead to you questioning what you have been doing for so long. You will wake up feeling like a shadow or ghost of yourself, because you know you can strive more and your soul deserves what you care about. Write that novel. Finish that painting. Find that deep love you have for your creative identity. Otherwise you may spend your time crashing through the same routine without any sense of worth in whatever it is you are doing.

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I have spent the past six weeks of my life traveling the country pursuing what I love most, music. Along my journey I have met many other musicians and people who have come to understand the idea of being free thanks to following their heart. They come in all different forms of individuals as well. Their lives are never boring and they are bleeding their passion into everything they do. This is my real life example of what has happened when I shed my old life and blossomed into one that is more fulfilling. I think a lot of people forget what they are fighting for in this life, and more likely than not forget to realize that it is possible to break from the normality and wed yourself to the idea of what you are passionate about. I clung onto the opportunity that I was handed and ran with it. Since then, I have found a new sense of value and perception of my self that I had been lacking and aching to find.

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I am one of the people that dropped their entire life in order to finally feel a sense of achievement in what I was more passionate about than the same routine of “wake up, go to work, come home, drink and sleep.” Now I have spent the night in various different states and with the idea that I can believe in myself and more importantly, everything I have done to shed the idea of not following my own heart. It has lead me to some magnificent places, gotten in touch with terrific people and stopped the process of regretting what I am doing in my life. My single biggest regret is not following my heart earlier in life, but I am beyond relieved I am doing it now.

Featured photo credit: Colin Czerwinski via colinczerwinski.com

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Last Updated on June 24, 2019

Why Social Media Might Be Causing Depression

Why Social Media Might Be Causing Depression

A study [1] published in Depression and Anxiety found that social media users are more likely to be depressed. This was just one of the huge number of studies linking social media and depression[2] . But why exactly do platforms like Facebook and Instagram make people so unhappy? Well, we don’t know yet for sure, but there are some explanations.

Social Media Could Lead to Depression

Depression is a serious medical condition that affects how you think, feel, and behave. Social media may lead to depression in predisposed individuals or make existing symptoms of depression[3] worse explains[4] the study above’s senior author Dr. Brian Primack. So, the problem may not be in social media per se, but how we use it.

Signs You’re Suffering From “Social Media Depression”

If you feel like social media is having a negative impact on your mood, then you may be suffering from “social media depression.” Look for symptoms like:

• low self-esteem,

• negative self-talk,

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• a low mood,

• irritability,

• a lack of interest in activities once enjoyed,

• and social withdrawal.

If you’ve had these symptoms for more than two weeks and if this is how you feel most of the time, then you are likely depressed. Although “social media depression “is not a term recognized in the medical setting, social media depression seems to be a real phenomenon affecting around 50% of social media users. As explained in a review study[5] published in Cyberpsychology, Behavior, and Social Networking, if a person has a certain predisposition to depression and other mental disorders, social media use may only worsen their mental health.

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Social Media Could Crush Self-Esteem

We know that social media and depression are in some way linked, but why is this so? Well, according to Igor Pantic, MD, Ph.D.[6], social media use skews your perception about other people’s lives and traits. To explain this further, most people like to portray an idealized image of their lives, personal traits, and appearance on sites like Facebook and Instagram. If you confuse this idealized image with reality, you may be under the false impression that everyone is better than you which can crush your self-esteem and lead to depression. This is especially true for teens and young adults who are more likely to compare themselves to others. If you already suffer from low self-esteem, the illusion that everyone has it better off than you will just make you feel worse.

Causing Social Isolation and Other Negative Emotions

Another commonly cited reason for the negative impact of social media on mental health is its link with social isolation. Depressed people are more likely to isolate themselves socially and chose only to interact indirectly through social media platforms. But communication online tends to be superficial and is lacking when compared to real-life interaction explains Panic. What this means is not that social media leads to isolation but the other way around, possibly explaining why we find so many depressed persons on these sites.

Lastly, social media use may generate negative emotions in you like envy, jealousy, dislike, loneliness, and many others and this may worsen your depressive symptoms.

Why We Need to Take This Seriously

Both depression and social media use are on the rise according to epidemiological studies. Since each one has an impact on the other, we have to start thinking of healthier ways to use social media. Teens and young adults are especially vulnerable to the negative impact of social media on mental health.

Advice on Social Media Use

Although these findings did not provide any cause-effect explanation regarding Facebook and depression[7], they still do prove that social media use may not be a good way to handle depression. For this reason, the leading authors of these studies gave some suggestions as to how clinicians and people can make use of such findings.

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One suggestion is that clinicians should ask patients about their social media habits. Then they can advise them on how to change their outlook on social media use or even suggest limiting their time spent on social media.

Some social media users may also exhibit addictive behavior; they may spend too much time due to compulsive urges. Any compulsive behavior is bound to lead to feelings of guilt which can worsen depressive symptoms.

Having Unhealthy Relationship with Social Media

If you feel like your relationship with social media is unhealthy, then consider the advice on healthy social media use provided by psychology experts from Links Psychology[8]:

Avoid negative social comparison – always keep in mind that how people portray themselves and their lives on social media is not a realistic picture, but rather an idealized one. Also, avoid comparing yourself to others because this behavior can lead to negative self-talk.

Remember that social media is not a replacement for real life – Social media is great for staying in touch and having fun, but it should never replace real-world interactions.

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Avoid releasing personal information – For your safety and privacy, make sure to be careful with what you post online.

Report users who bully and harass you – It’s easy to be a bully in the anonymous and distant world of social media. Don’t take such offense personally and report those who abuse social media to harass others.

The bits of advice listed above can help you establish a healthy relationship with social media. Always keep these things in mind to avoid losing an objective perspective of what social media is and how it is different from real life. If you are currently suffering from depression, talk to your doctor about what is bothering you so that you can get the treatment you need to get better. Tell your doctor about your social media use and see if they could give you some advice on this topic.

Reference

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