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11 Things That Happen After You Turn 30

11 Things That Happen After You Turn 30

When you were 20, there were probably a lot of things you wanted to do by the time you turn 30, and you likely thought that people over this age were actually quite old. However, the truth is that you don’t feel like you are 30 years old when that birthday hits you, but some things do change.

1. Hangovers become a real thing.

When you were twenty-something years old, you bragged about not having hangovers. You could even continue to drink the next day. Say goodbye to those days, because hangovers will soon become real torture that lasts 2 days. The torture includes nausea, headaches, and the famous quote “I am too old for this s**t.”

However, the bright side is that you finally learn to enjoy drinks, especially wine, and learn to get just a little drunk — which will make you happy rather than regretting your whole life.

2. Wild nightlife becomes a night in.

As you learn to enjoy good wine, and have the money to buy expensive drinks instead of cheap ones, you stop tolerating people who yell, drink a lot, and party till the morning. Crowded places, where the biggest challenge is getting to the bar and ordering drinks, are replaced with a night in with your partner or friends, drinking wine, having dinner, and watching films.

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Some Saturdays also mean spending time with a good movie or a book and just lying in a comfy bed.

3. You can’t eat everything anymore.

Before, you could eat any time of day, whatever you wanted, and not gain a pound. Now, everything you put in your body will show. Gaining weight becomes easier, as well as getting cellulite. So, you need to start exercising and eating healthier — which does not mean eating a cheeseburger at 2 AM.

Your metabolism and digestive system may have failed you, but eating healthy food and exercising will pay off.

4. Wrinkles, wrinkles everywhere.

You never cared about wrinkles until you saw your first ones. They don’t make you ugly, nor can everyone see them. The main problem with wrinkles is that you actually realize you are getting old and you cannot stop time.

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Real wrinkles come later, but when they occur you won’t care and they won’t be important. However, wrinkles are the first sign of becoming an adult, and there’s no reason to be sad and scared, because it’s much better than you think.

5. Grey hair starts to appear.

In your twenties, there were some grey hairs, but you could just pluck them and the problem was solved. However, when you turn 30, those grey hairs get to work on taking over your whole head — plucking isn’t an option anymore.

Since you have a job, you can afford an expensive and professional hair dresser who will create the perfect red carpet hairstyle for you — and make sure that your hair color is spot on.

6. You’ll actually start organizing events in advance.

Till recently, your motto regarding events was “go with the flow,” and planning was basically tweeting or posting an update about the event. The formula used to be: buy drinks, some food, the place doesn’t matter, nor does who shows up. However, those days are long gone.

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Now if you want to organize something, you do a lot of careful planning and make sure there are various drinks, extraordinary meals, and instead of tweets, you actually send invitations. When you were young, you couldn’t understand why people made such a big fuss about planning a wedding. Now, you aren’t just planning every little detail of your wedding, but also going through a pile of magazines and websites on the daily.

7. Your newsfeed is full of baby photos… and you like it.

You probably can’t tell exactly when the photos appearing in your newsfeed changed from wild parties to babies, but you actually don’t mind it at all. You may be complaining about them or making sarcastic comments, but deep inside you know that you like those cute baby pictures.

8. You don’t get easily offended

You were always confident, but you were a bit lost in the chaotic life — and the whole process of finding a job that you liked and figuring out who and where you want to be. By the time you turn 30, you still won’t have figured things out, but at least you’ll know what you want and how to get it.

When you were in your twenties, you were shaken and angry by a single comment on social media, but now you really don’t care about those things. You don’t have time for unimportant negative things. That’s why you don’t get easily offended, and you know how to stand up for yourself.

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9. You have a small circle of real friends.

Going out with 10 friends is a thing of the past, and you don’t tolerate random people that annoy you. You will finally learn to appreciate those few real friends that you have and love them unconditionally. Real happiness is having a few friends with whom you can share everything, instead of wasting time on toxic people or those that only drain your energy and give nothing back. Your best friends are the people you want to be with for the rest of your life.

10. You travel better.

No more cheap hotels and cramped hostel rooms, and say goodbye to sleeping in a car because you went on an unplanned vacation. In your thirties, you can afford nice rooms, eating in restaurants, and traveling with style.

Moreover, travelling has expanded beyond trips to top destinations. Traveling now includes short weekend trips to the countryside where you will recharge your batteries.

11. Love and sex are better.

You may have found the one or you might still be searching, but one thing is certain: you will find the person who truly makes you happy. Love becomes the only thing that keeps you going and inspires you to do more. Of course, your sex life also becomes better as your thirties are the time when you finally start loving your body, which makes you more confident around your partner.

After all, if we put some changes aside, being 30 is awesome. There is no better time to experience life. Don’t be afraid —  things will only get better.

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Katarina Milovanovic

Creative Writer

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Last Updated on January 15, 2021

7 Ways To Have More Confident Body Language

7 Ways To Have More Confident Body Language

The popular idiomatic saying that “actions speak louder than words” has been around for centuries, but even to this day, most people struggle with at least one area of nonverbal communication. Consequently, many of us aspire to have more confident body language but don’t have the knowledge and tools necessary to change what are largely unconscious behaviors.

Given that others’ perceptions of our competence and confidence are predominantly influenced by what we do with our faces and bodies, it’s important to develop greater self-awareness and consciously practice better posture, stance, eye contact, facial expressions, hand movements, and other aspects of body language.

Posture

First things first: how is your posture? Let’s start with a quick self-assessment of your body.

  • Are your shoulders slumped over or rolled back in an upright posture?
  • When you stand up, do you evenly distribute your weight or lean excessively to one side?
  • Does your natural stance place your feet relatively shoulder-width apart or are your feet and legs close together in a closed-off position?
  • When you sit, does your lower back protrude out in a slumped position or maintain a straight, spine-friendly posture in your seat?

All of these are important considerations to make when evaluating and improving your posture and stance, which will lead to more confident body language over time. If you routinely struggle with maintaining good posture, consider buying a posture trainer/corrector, consulting a chiropractor or physical therapist, stretching daily, and strengthening both your core and back muscles.

Facial Expressions

Are you prone to any of the following in personal or professional settings?

  • Bruxism (tight, clenched jaw or grinding teeth)
  • Frowning and/or furrowing brows
  • Avoiding direct eye contact and/or staring at the ground

If you answered “yes” to any of these, then let’s start by examining various ways in which you can project confident body language through your facial expressions.

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1. Understand How Others Perceive Your Facial Expressions

A December 2020 study by UC Berkeley and Google researchers utilized a deep neural network to analyze facial expressions in six million YouTube clips representing people from over 140 countries. The study found that, despite socio-cultural differences, people around the world tended to use about 70% of the same facial expressions in response to different emotional stimuli and situations.[1]

The study’s researchers also published a fascinating interactive map to demonstrate how their machine learning technology assessed various facial expressions and determined subtle differences in emotional responses.

This study highlights the social importance of facial expressions because whether or not we’re consciously aware of them—by gazing into a mirror or your screen on a video conferencing platform—how we present our faces to others can have tremendous impacts on their perceptions of us, our confidence, and our emotional states. This awareness is the essential first step towards

2. Relax Your Face

New research on bruxism and facial tension found the stresses and anxieties of Covid-19 lockdowns led to considerable increases in orofacial pain, jaw-clenching, and teeth grinding, particularly among women.[2]

The National Institute of Dental and Craniofacial Research estimates that more than 10 million Americans alone have temporomandibular joint dysfunction (TMJ syndrome), and facial tension can lead to other complications such as insomnia, wrinkles, dry skin, and dark, puffy bags under your eyes.[3])

To avoid these unpleasant outcomes, start practicing progressive muscle relaxation techniques and taking breaks more frequently throughout the day to moderate facial tension.[4] You should also try out some biofeedback techniques to enhance your awareness of involuntary bodily processes like facial tension and achieve more confident body language as a result.[5]

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3. Improve Your Eye Contact

Did you know there’s an entire subfield of kinesic communication research dedicated to eye movements and behaviors called oculesics?[6] It refers to various communication behaviors including direct eye contact, averting one’s gaze, pupil dilation/constriction, and even frequency of blinking. All of these qualities can shape how other people perceive you, which means that eye contact is yet another area of nonverbal body language that we should be more mindful of in social interactions.

The ideal type (direct/indirect) and duration of eye contact depends on a variety of factors, such as cultural setting, differences in power/authority/age between the parties involved, and communication context. Research has shown that differences in the effects of eye contact are particularly prominent when comparing East Asian and Western European/North American cultures.[7]

To improve your eye contact with others, strive to maintain consistent contact for at least 3 to 4 seconds at a time, consciously consider where you’re looking while listening to someone else, and practice eye contact as much as possible (as strange as this may seem in the beginning, it’s the best way to improve).

3. Smile More

There are many benefits to smiling and laughing, and when it comes to working on more confident body language, this is an area that should be fun, low-stakes, and relatively stress-free.

Smiling is associated with the “happiness chemical” dopamine and the mood-stabilizing hormone, serotonin. Many empirical studies have shown that smiling generally leads to positive outcomes for the person smiling, and further research has shown that smiling can influence listeners’ perceptions of our confidence and trustworthiness as well.

4. Hand Gestures

Similar to facial expressions and posture, what you do with your hands while speaking or listening in a conversation can significantly influence others’ perceptions of you in positive or negative ways.

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It’s undoubtedly challenging to consciously account for all of your nonverbal signals while simultaneously trying to stay engaged with the verbal part of the discussion, but putting in the effort to develop more bodily awareness now will make it much easier to unconsciously project more confident body language later on.

5. Enhance Your Handshake

In the article, “An Anthropology of the Handshake,” University of Copenhagen social anthropology professor Bjarke Oxlund assessed the future of handshaking in wake of the Covid-19 pandemic:[8]

“Handshakes not only vary in function and meaning but do so according to social context, situation and scale. . . a public discussion should ensue on the advantages and disadvantages of holding on to the tradition of shaking hands as the conventional gesture of greeting and leave-taking in a variety of circumstances.”

It’s too early to determine some of the ways in which Covid-19 has permanently changed our social norms and professional etiquette standards, but it’s reasonable to assume that handshaking may retain its importance in American society even after this pandemic. To practice more confident body language in the meantime, the video on the science of the perfect handshake below explains what you need to know.

6. Complement Your Verbals With Hand Gestures

As you know by now, confident communication involves so much more than simply smiling more or sounding like you know what you’re talking about. What you do with your hands can be particularly influential in how others perceive you, whether you’re fidgeting with an object, clenching your fists, hiding your hands in your pockets, or calmly gesturing to emphasize important points you’re discussing.

Social psychology researchers have found that “iconic gestures”—hand movements that appear to be meaningfully related to the speaker’s verbal content—can have profound impacts on listeners’ information retention. In other words, people are more likely to engage with you and remember more of what you said when you speak with complementary hand gestures instead of just your voice.[9]

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Further research on hand gestures has shown that even your choice of the left or right hand for gesturing can influence your ability to clearly convey information to listeners, which supports the notion that more confident body language is readily achievable through greater self-awareness and deliberate nonverbal actions.[10]

Final Takeaways

Developing better posture, enhancing your facial expressiveness, and practicing hand gestures can vastly improve your communication with other people. At first, it will be challenging to consciously practice nonverbal behaviors that many of us are accustomed to performing daily without thinking about them.

If you ever feel discouraged, however, remember that there’s no downside to consistently putting in just a little more time and effort to increase your bodily awareness. With the tips and strategies above, you’ll be well on your way to embracing more confident body language and amplifying others’ perceptions of you in no time.

More Tips on How to Develop a Confident Body Language

Featured photo credit: Maria Lupan via unsplash.com

Reference

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