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11 Things That Happen After You Turn 30

11 Things That Happen After You Turn 30

When you were 20, there were probably a lot of things you wanted to do by the time you turn 30, and you likely thought that people over this age were actually quite old. However, the truth is that you don’t feel like you are 30 years old when that birthday hits you, but some things do change.

1. Hangovers become a real thing.

When you were twenty-something years old, you bragged about not having hangovers. You could even continue to drink the next day. Say goodbye to those days, because hangovers will soon become real torture that lasts 2 days. The torture includes nausea, headaches, and the famous quote “I am too old for this s**t.”

However, the bright side is that you finally learn to enjoy drinks, especially wine, and learn to get just a little drunk — which will make you happy rather than regretting your whole life.

2. Wild nightlife becomes a night in.

As you learn to enjoy good wine, and have the money to buy expensive drinks instead of cheap ones, you stop tolerating people who yell, drink a lot, and party till the morning. Crowded places, where the biggest challenge is getting to the bar and ordering drinks, are replaced with a night in with your partner or friends, drinking wine, having dinner, and watching films.

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Some Saturdays also mean spending time with a good movie or a book and just lying in a comfy bed.

3. You can’t eat everything anymore.

Before, you could eat any time of day, whatever you wanted, and not gain a pound. Now, everything you put in your body will show. Gaining weight becomes easier, as well as getting cellulite. So, you need to start exercising and eating healthier — which does not mean eating a cheeseburger at 2 AM.

Your metabolism and digestive system may have failed you, but eating healthy food and exercising will pay off.

4. Wrinkles, wrinkles everywhere.

You never cared about wrinkles until you saw your first ones. They don’t make you ugly, nor can everyone see them. The main problem with wrinkles is that you actually realize you are getting old and you cannot stop time.

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Real wrinkles come later, but when they occur you won’t care and they won’t be important. However, wrinkles are the first sign of becoming an adult, and there’s no reason to be sad and scared, because it’s much better than you think.

5. Grey hair starts to appear.

In your twenties, there were some grey hairs, but you could just pluck them and the problem was solved. However, when you turn 30, those grey hairs get to work on taking over your whole head — plucking isn’t an option anymore.

Since you have a job, you can afford an expensive and professional hair dresser who will create the perfect red carpet hairstyle for you — and make sure that your hair color is spot on.

6. You’ll actually start organizing events in advance.

Till recently, your motto regarding events was “go with the flow,” and planning was basically tweeting or posting an update about the event. The formula used to be: buy drinks, some food, the place doesn’t matter, nor does who shows up. However, those days are long gone.

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Now if you want to organize something, you do a lot of careful planning and make sure there are various drinks, extraordinary meals, and instead of tweets, you actually send invitations. When you were young, you couldn’t understand why people made such a big fuss about planning a wedding. Now, you aren’t just planning every little detail of your wedding, but also going through a pile of magazines and websites on the daily.

7. Your newsfeed is full of baby photos… and you like it.

You probably can’t tell exactly when the photos appearing in your newsfeed changed from wild parties to babies, but you actually don’t mind it at all. You may be complaining about them or making sarcastic comments, but deep inside you know that you like those cute baby pictures.

8. You don’t get easily offended

You were always confident, but you were a bit lost in the chaotic life — and the whole process of finding a job that you liked and figuring out who and where you want to be. By the time you turn 30, you still won’t have figured things out, but at least you’ll know what you want and how to get it.

When you were in your twenties, you were shaken and angry by a single comment on social media, but now you really don’t care about those things. You don’t have time for unimportant negative things. That’s why you don’t get easily offended, and you know how to stand up for yourself.

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9. You have a small circle of real friends.

Going out with 10 friends is a thing of the past, and you don’t tolerate random people that annoy you. You will finally learn to appreciate those few real friends that you have and love them unconditionally. Real happiness is having a few friends with whom you can share everything, instead of wasting time on toxic people or those that only drain your energy and give nothing back. Your best friends are the people you want to be with for the rest of your life.

10. You travel better.

No more cheap hotels and cramped hostel rooms, and say goodbye to sleeping in a car because you went on an unplanned vacation. In your thirties, you can afford nice rooms, eating in restaurants, and traveling with style.

Moreover, travelling has expanded beyond trips to top destinations. Traveling now includes short weekend trips to the countryside where you will recharge your batteries.

11. Love and sex are better.

You may have found the one or you might still be searching, but one thing is certain: you will find the person who truly makes you happy. Love becomes the only thing that keeps you going and inspires you to do more. Of course, your sex life also becomes better as your thirties are the time when you finally start loving your body, which makes you more confident around your partner.

After all, if we put some changes aside, being 30 is awesome. There is no better time to experience life. Don’t be afraid —  things will only get better.

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Katarina Milovanovic

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Published on October 7, 2019

4 Types of Toxic People and How to Deal with Them

4 Types of Toxic People and How to Deal with Them

Can a person really be toxic? Well, a toxic person does not refer to those who are affected by the virus or toxic. To be precise, toxic people are those who are very unsupportive, abusive and unhealthy in nature. Their behavior is filled with venom and you will not feel any sort of gentle breeze in their words.

In this article, you will learn how to spot out a toxic person, and what you can do to deal with them.

Signs of Toxic People

To make it more obvious, I have added some signs of toxic people below.

Manipulative Behavior And Fabricated Mind

Toxic people are unable to deal with the bitter truth firmly. If you are going to blurt out their fabrications with proof, they will try to change the whole matter with their manipulative behavior. They will titillate you with sensitive words or they will try to frighten you to get rid of the problems.

Inhuman And Merciless in Nature

We know that sharing our thoughts with friends will keep us in good mental state. But, if you are not getting fruitful outcomes, you have to understand that you are spending time with toxic friends.

Toxic people do not know how to put themselves in other’s shoes. They just put on a mask of simplicity. But, in reality, they don’t have feelings for you. Therefore, you should stop sharing your valuable time with them as you will get nothing except annoyance and silence.

Hypocrisy at Its Best in Their Nature

Toxic people have a great hunger for respect, adoration, and fidelity. After dignifying them with these valuable elements, you will get nothing; you will be cheated, manipulated and criticized by them. And, if you are not willing to listen to them, you will be controlled by guilt-tripping.

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Emotional Outburst And Pathological Excuses

Toxic people always want to see themselves in the positive end. Therefore, to get their job done, they always have an emotional outburst and emotional excuse to make an impulsive impression upon you.

We do mistakes and it is our duty to accept those mistakes. But, toxic people have their own rules, they have a tendency to present themselves rationally even after committing a mistake. If someone tries to expose themselves with facts, they show no embarrassment and use emotional excuses as a shield.

Play with Your Emotion And Gradually Erode It

Toxic people always try to condescend you with critical jokes and when you try to elicit your thoughts, they just burst out laughing. Teasing becomes an important element in your relationship with toxic person. They even give you backhanded compliments to belittle you.

Thus, using their toxic mindset, they just gradually diminish your abilities as well as intelligence. And you will have nothing left in your hand other than putting up with these things to maintain the silence.

Well, you probably might have not seen all these signs in one person as there are different types of toxic people roaming around you.

4 Types of Toxic People

To understand it better, I’m mentioning the different types of toxic people here.

1. Conversational Narcissist

There are some toxic people who do not know how to give importance to others. They will talk about themselves but never ask you about your condition; they will only recall you when they need you or they are facing some sort of problems.

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2. Emotional Vampires

These vampires do not suck your blood but dissipate your emotion. They always talk negatively about everyone and compel you to think in the same pattern that they follow. They mask themselves in such a way in front of you that you gradually start giving importance to them. But, ultimately, you will not get any positive outcome from them.

3. Monsters with Green eyes

As discussed earlier, toxic people will give you backhanded compliments. Basically, these are called monsters with green eyes. These monsters feel happy when you feel sad. Therefore, they will always try to belittle your achievements, intelligence, and strengths. Along with it, they give compliments with some negativity in it.

4. Black-Eyed Cats

These cats always do mew-mew and try to control everything around them. They love to be pampered but, they do not like if someone goes against them.

If you are in a relationship with such persons, you will be nagged until you are giving them complete satisfaction. In a nutshell, it must be said that you have to align yourself with them if you want to live with them. But, ultimately, you will lose your mental, conversational and emotional freedom.

How to Deal with Toxic People

Living with problems is more convenient than living with toxic people. But, toxic people are parasites and therefore, you will see these monsters rambling around you wherever you go.

However, if you know how to deal with them, it would be very helpful for you and your life would be much easier to live. We have added some tips to assist you, just check these out.

Get Rid of Intermittent Reinforcement

We are very optimistic in nature and over the time, this optimism has reached to such a level that we can happily put up with the ‘close losses’ instead of trying to catch the ‘near wins’.

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B.F Skinner once did an experiment with three rats. He put them in different cages attached with levers. The lever delivered food when it was pressed. In the 1st cage, the lever always delivered food when the rat pressed it. In case of the 2nd cage, food was never delivered by the lever even after pressing it, therefore, the rat understood the lesson and never tried to get food. But, in the third cage, the lever delivered food randomly and as a result, the rat was completely hooked and fixated. He constantly pushed it but didn’t get the food always.

Well, this is called intermittent relationship and the same thing happens in human relationships where toxic people give you intermittent reinforcement and your heart gets pumped up with optimism. As a result, you will be hooked and your life will be fixated at some point with toxic people.

You should learn to move on without them and live your life happily because random happiness cannot bring permanent relief.

Never Make Too Many Allowances And Pardons

Well, sympathetic attitude is very good and it is also a fact that sometimes toxic people suffer from genuine depression, physical as well as mental illness. But, you have to set a boundary and you cannot allow people to get away with anything so easily.

If you make too many allowances as well as pardons, it would not be good for you in the long-term. Yes, there are some people who are facing extreme hardships and they are not even toxic in nature. But, all you can do is show some genuine compassion keeping yourself within the boundaries.

Always Try to Ignore Their Toxic Traps

Demotivational words are the primary weapon that they frequently use in their implications to detract you. Along with this, they throw words in such a way that you start feeling guilty. Well, you must understand that these are just toxic traps and you should not step on it.

Always remember that you will have full access to freedom if you stop taking things personally. They not only do this with you but also with everyone. You just have to keep in mind that these toxic words are not based on truth but on their own mental reproduction. So, you just have to ignore this and focus on your work.

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Show Them Your Beautiful Smile Not the Curves on Your Forehead

Toxic people have an aptitude to attack mentally, mock disgracefully and diminish shamefully. But, you will not be affected if you don’t surrender yourself. Show them that you are not getting belittled or insulted.

We all have our problems and we also know that we are capable of solving these problems. Therefore, the matter entirely depends upon us and if we don’t allow these vampires to enter into our life or play with our emotions, they cannot suck our happiness. So, I’d suggest you show your beautiful smile when they buzz around you.

Don’t Suppress Yourself

Toxic people will intimidate, bully, pass guilt, and forcefully take money from you to get their job done. They know very well that they are doing wrong and at the same time, they are acquainted with the concept that we are incapable of doing anything against them.

Most of the time, we keep ourselves quiet until someone speaks up. And because of this suppressive mindset, we are gradually being dragged into their mind games.

Well, we have to change this concept as it infuses courage into them. We need to obstruct them with firm minds and make them realize the negative consequences of their behavior.[1] If they are upsetting you, just tell them directly. Your direct statement might open a new gate of opportunity that will allow you to help them if they are suffering from genuine problems.

So, why are you still tolerating these toxic people? Follow the tips mentioned above and deal with them in the right way.

Featured photo credit: Devin Avery via unsplash.com

Reference

[1] Tips for Grooming: Change Your Fixed Negative Belief

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