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25 Things You Should Do Before You’re 50

25 Things You Should Do Before You’re 50

Let me start off by saying this.

I’m nowhere near 40. Nor do I have any idea what it’s like the moment you turn 40. But I do everything I can to surround myself with older mentors and teachers who are some of the happiest, most fulfilled, and successful people I know (in every aspect of life— health, wealth, love).

With that said, here’s 25 things you should do before you turn 50.

1. Travel the World Alone.

Traveling alone is a completely different experience than traveling with someone else. You get to do what you do, when you want to, and it’s when you learn to love yourself without depending on anyone else.

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    2. Travel the World Together.

    With that said, traveling together with someone you love can bring you closer than you could have imagined. The real person comes out when you travel with them, and it’s better to have this experience now than sooner.

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      3. Start Something That Lasts.

      Leaving a legacy behind is one of the most important things in my life, and to many of the happiest people in the world, because they have something to live for. Leaving something behind, beyond your physical presence, can be powerful just to think about.

      It can be a non-profit, your own business, a movement. It doesn’t matter what it is. Just start one.

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        4. Become a Mentee.

        Ask any successful person, and 99% will tell you they’ve gotten to where they are because someone mentored them along the way. If you find the right mentor, give even more value back than you receive.

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          5. Become a Mentor.

          If you’ve been mentored sometime in your life, then you understand how powerful it can be to someone’s destiny. Become that light at the end of the tunnel for someone in need, it can be one of the best choices you make.

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            6. Give Back.

            It’s only when we live for something beyond ourselves that we feel a sense of purpose and fulfillment. Giving back doesn’t have to be done only at an individual level. At Rype, we donate a portion of our profits back to organizations like Pencils of Promise, where they’ve built over 300+ schools in developing nations like Nicaragua, Guatemala, and Laos.

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              7. Go Skinny Dipping.

              You know you want to.

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                8. Start a Journal.

                Recording down your present thoughts, and reviewing it years later can be incredibly fulfilling to see how far you’ve come. It can be a blog, vlog, podcast, or a journal that you keep for yourself.

                The world deserves to hear your message.

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                  9. Attend a Religious Event (that’s not your own).

                  This may seem controversial, but most of us have either never been to a religious event or only attended one (probably the one you were born into).
                  Whether you’re religious or not, why not explore to understand what other types of religious faiths that exist?

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                    10. Fall in Love.

                     
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                      11. Learn to Be Happy Alone.

                      Depending on someone else to be happy is no way to live. Knowing that you can love yourself and find happiness alone, can be one of the most freeing discoveries in your life.

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                        12. Become an Expert at Something.

                        While it’s important to have a general understanding of diverse topics and skillsets, you should also be an expert at something. If someone in your life hears your name, there should be a skill that they can always rely on you for. Become a T-Shaped individual.

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                          13. Live in a Developing Country.

                          In the past 15 months, I lived in over a handful developing nations around the world, including Colombia, Argentina, Mexico, and Peru.
                          Traveling around hotels and visiting tourist spots in the country doesn’t help you understand anything about the culture itself. You have to live it.

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                            14. Visit your Elementary Teacher.

                            We should always give more credit than given to the people responsible for our education back in Elementary. My elementary teacher, Ms.Thorton, taught me how to speak English, showed me how to treat others, and taught me to think big. In most cases, they taught us things that we probably can’t even remember today, but has influenced many important decisions we made throughout our journey.

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                              15. Commit to a Health Ritual.

                              This is a common pattern that I see in nearly every person that hits 30 or 35.
                              Their priority of health starts to become the #1 priority in their life, even over wealth. What’s the point of accumulating wealth, if you’re not in a healthy state to enjoy it?

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                                16. Have more than One Career.

                                We live in the “hyphenated” world today. You’re an Engineer, Entrepreneur, Designer, Writer. Or Investor, Author, Speaker, etc. With technology moving industries and markets faster than ever before, and people living longer than ever, it’s not only possible to have more than one career, but it’s necessary.

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                                  17. Replace your Coffee with Tea.

                                  Cut the jitter, introduce the calm.

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                                    18. Have a Signature Dish.

                                    You may not need to know how to cook. But every person needs a signature dish. Keep it as your secret weapon.

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                                      19. Read 100+ Books.

                                      Knowledge is freedom. If you’re not growing, you’re dying.

                                      This post should help you out.

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                                        20. Buy Wine Today You’ll Drink In 20 Years.

                                        You can also do this with long-time friends.

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                                          21. Adopt.

                                          Be it a dog, cat, or baby, make the decision to turn someone’s life around.

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                                            22. Call up an Old Friend.

                                            If there’s someone you haven’t spoken to in a few years, or even a decade.
                                            Reach out to them. In the one-tap, social media world that we live in, there’s no reason to even call them. Just send them a message.

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                                              23. Learn How to Say “No.”

                                              Turning down opportunities allows you to do your best work.
                                              A great book to read is the Power of No by James Altucher.

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                                                24. Write a letter to your 10-year future self.

                                                Where do you want to be in 10-years? What would you say to this person?
                                                Share everything in a letter, and keep it locked for 10 years. Then 10 years later, write another letter to your 10-year future self.

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                                                  25. Learn a New Language.

                                                  If you’ve went your entire life knowing only one language (English), you’ve put a glass ceiling on yourself, because you can only reach 12% of this world’s population.

                                                  Learning a new language is the catalyst that opens up doors to new cultures, people, and opportunities. Learning how to speak Spanish alone can nearly double your global reach, and allow you to have a global perspective and a deeper understanding of the world outside your current limits.

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                                                    Take advantages of online websites like Rype, offering unlimited one-on-one Spanish lessons online with a professional language coach. Try it free for 14 days and get 3 free lessons with 3 different coaches when you sign up.

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                                                    Sean Kim

                                                    Sean is the founder and CEO of Rype, a language learning app. He's an entrepreneur and blogger.

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                                                    Last Updated on March 30, 2020

                                                    What Does Self-Conscious Mean? (And How to Stop Being It)

                                                    What Does Self-Conscious Mean? (And How to Stop Being It)

                                                    Have you ever walked into a room and felt like your nerves simply couldn’t handle it? Your heart beats fast, you start to sweat, and you feel like all eyes are on you (even if they’re really not). This is just one of the many ways that being self-conscious can rear its ugly head.

                                                    You may not even realize you’re self-conscious, and you may be wondering, “What does self-conscious mean?” That’s a good place to start.

                                                    This article will define self-consciousness, show how practically everyone has faced it at one point or another, and give you tips to avoid it.

                                                    What Does Self-Conscious Mean?

                                                    According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, self-conscious is defined as “conscious of one’s own acts or states as belonging to or originating in oneself.”[1]

                                                    Not so bad, right? There’s another definition, though — one that speaks more to what you’re going through: “feeling uncomfortably conscious of oneself as an object of the observation of others.” For those of us who regularly deal with extreme self-consciousness, that second definition sounds about right.

                                                    There are many different ways self-consciousness can spring up. You may feel self-conscious around people you know, like your family members or closest friends. You may feel self-conscious at work, even though you spend hours every week around your co-workers. Or you may feel self-conscious when out in public and surrounded by strangers. However, you probably don’t feel self-conscious when you’re home alone.

                                                    How to Stop Being Too Self-Conscious

                                                    When you’re in the throes of self-consciousness, it’s nearly impossible to remember how to stop feeling that way. That’s why it’s so important to prepare ahead of time, when you’re feeling ready to tackle the problem instead of succumbing to it.

                                                    Here are a variety of ways to feel better about yourself and stop thinking about how others see you.

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                                                    1. Ask Yourself, “So What?”

                                                    One way to banish negative, self-conscious thoughts is to do just that: banish them.

                                                    The next time you walk into a room and feel your face getting red, think to yourself, “So what?” How much does it really matter if people don’t like how you look or act? What’s the worst that could happen?

                                                    Most of the time, you’ll find that you don’t have a good answer to this question. Then, you can immediately start assigning such thoughts less importance. With self-awareness, you can acknowledge that your negative thoughts are present and realize that you don’t agree with them.[2] They’re just thoughts, after all.

                                                    2. Be Honest

                                                    A lie that self-consciousness might tell is that there’s one way to act or feel. Honestly, though, everyone else is just figuring life out as well. There isn’t a preferred way to show up to an event, gathering, or public place. What you can do is be honest with your feelings and thoughts.[3]

                                                    If you feel offended by something someone says, you don’t have to smile to be polite or laugh to fit in with the crowd. Instead, you can politely say why you disagree or excuse yourself and find a group of people who you relate to better. If you’re nervous, don’t overcompensate by trying to look relaxed and casual — it’ll be obvious you’re putting on a front. Instead, nothing is more endearing than saying, “I’m a little nervous!” to a room of people who probably feel the exact same way.

                                                    On the same note, if you don’t understand why someone wants you to do something, question it. You can do this at work, at home, or even with people you don’t know well. Nobody should force you to do something you don’t want to do.

                                                    Also, even if you’re willing to do what’s asked of you, there’s nothing wrong with asking for more clarification. People will realize that you’re not a person to be bossed around.

                                                    3. Understand Why You’re Struggling at Work

                                                    Being self-conscious at work can get in the way of your daily responsibilities, your relationships with co-workers, and even your career as a whole. If you’re facing some sort of conflict but you’re too nervous to speak up, you may be at the whim of what happens to you instead of taking some control.

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                                                    If you’re usually confident at work, you may be wondering where this new self-consciousness is coming from. It’s possible that you’re dealing with burnout.[4] Common signs are anxiety, fatigue and distraction, all of which can leave you feeling under-confident.

                                                    4. Succeed at Something

                                                    When you create success in your life, it’s easier to feel confident[5] and less self-conscious. If you feel self-conscious at work, finish the project that’s been looming over your head. If you feel self-conscious in the gym, complete an advanced workout class.

                                                    Exposing yourself to what you’re scared of and then succeeding at it in some way (even just by finishing it) can do wonders for your self-esteem. The more confidence you build, the more likely you are to have more success in the future, which will create a cycle of confidence-building.

                                                    5. Treat All of You — Not Just Your Self-Consciousness

                                                    Trying to solve your self-consciousness alone may not treat the root of the problem. Instead, take a well-rounded approach to lower your self-consciousness and build confidence in areas where you may struggle.

                                                    Even professional counselors are embracing this holistic type of treatment[6] because they feel that the health of the mind and body are inextricably linked. This approach combines physical, spiritual, and psychological components. Common activities and treatments include meditation, yoga, massage, and healthy changes to diet and exercise.

                                                    If much of this is new to you, it will pay to give it a try. You never know how it will impact you.

                                                    If you’re feeling self-conscious about how your body looks, a massage that makes you feel great could boost your confidence. If you try a new workout, you could have something exciting to talk about the next time you’re in a group setting.

                                                    Putting yourself in a new situation and learning that you can get through it with grace can give you the confidence to get through all sorts of events and nerve-wracking moments.

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                                                    6. Make the Changes That Are Within Your Control

                                                    Let’s say you walk into a room and you’re self-conscious about how you look. However, you may have put a lot of time and effort into your outfit. Even though it may stand out, this is how you have chosen to express yourself.

                                                    You have to work on your internal confidence, not your external appearance. There’s nothing to change other than your outlook.

                                                    On the other hand, maybe there’s something that you don’t like about yourself that you can change. For example, maybe you hate how a birthmark on your face looks or have varicose veins that you think are unsightly. If you can do something about these things, do it! There’s nothing wrong with changing your appearance (or skills, education, etc.) if it’s going to make you more confident.

                                                    You don’t have to accept your current situation for acceptance’s sake. There’s no award for putting up with something you hate. Confidence is also required to make changes that are scary, even if they’re for the better. Plus, it may be an easier fix than you thought. For example, treating varicose veins doesn’t have to involve surgery — sometimes simple compression stockings will take care of the problem.[7]

                                                    7. Realize That Everyone Has Awkward Moments

                                                    Everyone has said something awkward to someone else and lived to tell the tale. We’ve all forgotten somebody’s name or said, “You too!” when the concession stand girl says to enjoy our movie. Not only are these things uber-common, but they’re not nearly as embarrassing as you feel they are.

                                                    Think about how you react when someone else does something awkward. Do you think, “Wow, that person’s such a loser!” or do you think, “What a relief, I’m not the only one who does that.” Chances are good that’s the same reaction others have to you when you stumble.

                                                    Remember, self-consciousness is a state of mind that you have control over. You don’t have to feel this way. Do what you need to in order to build your confidence, put your self-consciousness in perspective, and start exercising your “I feel awesome about myself” muscle. It’ll get easier with time.

                                                    When Is Being Self-Conscious a Good Thing?

                                                    Self-consciousness can sometimes be a good thing[8], but you have to take the awkwardness and nerves out of it.

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                                                    In this case, “self-aware” is a much better term. Knowing how you come off to people is an excellent trait; you’ll be able to read a room and understand how what you do and say affects others. These are fantastic skills for people work and personal relationships.

                                                    Self-awareness helps you dress appropriately for the occasion, tells you that you’re talking too loud or not loud enough, and guides a conversation so you don’t offend or bore anyone.

                                                    It’s not about being someone you’re not — that can actually have adverse effects, just like self-consciousness. Instead, it’s about turning up certain aspects of yourself to perform well in the situation.

                                                    Final Thoughts

                                                    When you’re self-conscious, you’re constantly battling with yourself in an effort to control how other people view you. You try to change yourself to suit what you think other people want to see.

                                                    The truth, though, is that you can’t actually control how other people view you — and you may not even be correct about how they view you in the first place.

                                                    Being confident doesn’t happen overnight. Instead, it happens in small steps as you slowly build your confidence and say “no” to your self-consciousness. It also requires accepting that you’re going to feel self-conscious sometimes, and that’s okay.

                                                    Sometimes worrying that there is a problem can be more stressful than the problem itself. Feeling bad for feeling self-conscious can be more troublesome than simply feeling it and getting on with the day.

                                                    Forgive yourself for being human and make the small changes that will lead to better confidence in the future.

                                                    More Tips for Improving Your Self-Esteem

                                                    Featured photo credit: Cata via unsplash.com

                                                    Reference

                                                    [1] Merriam-Webster: Self-conscious
                                                    [2] Bustle: 7 Tips On How To Stop Feeling Self-Conscious
                                                    [3] Marc and Angel: 10 Things to Remember When You Feel Unsure of Yourself
                                                    [4] Bostitch: How to Protect Small Businesses From Burnout
                                                    [5] Psychology Today: Self-conscious? Get Over It
                                                    [6] Wake Forest University: Embracing Holistic Medicine
                                                    [7] Center for Vein Restoration: What Causes Venous Ulcers, and How Are They Treated?
                                                    [8] Scientific American: The Pros and Cons of Being Self-Aware

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