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Why We Must Learn to Accept Defeat

Why We Must Learn to Accept Defeat

It’s incredibly tough to face defeat, all too easy to assume that losing means we’re a failure or not worth anything. But in order to push past defeat, we must first confront it. Smarter people than you or I have pointed that out in some excellent quotes and excerpts. Here is some wonderful advice from great people from history on how to accept and even grow from defeat.

1. “There is no better than adversity.”

Legendary human rights activist Malcom X said, “There is no better than adversity. Every defeat, every heartbreak, every loss, contains its own seed, its own lesson on how to improve your performance the next time.” He’s someone who knew a lot, too much in fact, about heartbreak and loss, so that quote is especially valuable coming from him. Don’t let defeat, no matter how painful at the time, define and control you. Instead, use it as fuel to become better and stronger physically, mentally, spiritually or emotionally.

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2. “Learn to die to be liberated from death.”

As said by the master, Bruce Lee, “Like everyone else you want to learn the way to win, but never to accept the way to lose — to accept defeat. To learn to die is to be liberated from it. So when tomorrow comes you must free your ambitious mind and learn the art of dying!” Once you can finally accept of defeat, also referred to as the death of a dream, you can move forward with your life. Furthermore, that fearlessness will free you to do your true best, which in itself will mean more wins and less defeat.

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3. “We should be thankful to those who let us fly this flight.”

Aerospace engineer Gordan Cooper is quoted as saying, “Father, we thank you, especially for letting me fly this flight – for the privilege of being able to be in this position, to be in this wondrous place, seeing all these many startling, wonderful things that you have created.” We need to display gratitude towards those that gave us an opportunity to “compete” in the first place, whether they be gods, mentors, friends or some other presence in our lives. Being defeated is better than not attempting sometime at all, so we should thank those who gave us an opportunity to take a shot at our goal.

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4. “Be humble.”

Motivational author Harvey Mackay is known for the quote, “Talent is God-given; be humble. Fame is man-given; be thankful. Conceit is self-given; be careful.” Defeat isn’t always due to a lack of will or effort. In fact, it rarely is. It’s often the case that others have a genetic or situational advantage over you which caused you to “fail.” And in fact, sometimes defeat is the only thing that can remind you of how to humble yourself and see a larger world. Remember that every defeat gives you an opportunity to humble yourself in the eyes of your gods, friends, family or another thing you consider bigger than yourself.

5. “Success isn’t meaningful if it isn’t because of growth.”

Benjamin Franklin probably never would have discovered electricity or played his part in the creation of the United States if he didn’t believe this. He is quoted as saying, “Without continual growth and progress, such words as improvement, achievement, and success have no meaning.” He spent most of his time learning and improving himself so that he could make a true, lasting, positive impact on the world. Only through defeat can you grow, and only through growth can you actually earn any sense of success. This and the other messages are important to remember if you’re struggling to accept defeat.

Featured photo credit: Defeat/James Simkins via flickr.com

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Matt OKeefe

Matt is a marketer and writer who shares about lifestyle and productivity tips on Lifehack.

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Last Updated on January 21, 2020

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

If I was a super hero I’d want my super power to be the ability to motivate everyone around me. Think of how many problems you could solve just by being able to motivate people towards their goals. You wouldn’t be frustrated by lazy co-workers. You wouldn’t be mad at your partner for wasting the weekend in front of the TV. Also, the more people around you are motivated toward their dreams, the more you can capitalize off their successes.

Being able to motivate people is key to your success at work, at home, and in the future because no one can achieve anything alone. We all need the help of others.

So, how to motivate people? Here are 7 ways to motivate others even you can do.

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1. Listen

Most people start out trying to motivate someone by giving them a lengthy speech, but this rarely works because motivation has to start inside others. The best way to motivate others is to start by listening to what they want to do. Find out what the person’s goals and dreams are. If it’s something you want to encourage, then continue through these steps.

2. Ask Open-Ended Questions

Open-ended questions are the best way to figure out what someone’s dreams are. If you can’t think of anything to ask, start with, “What have you always wanted to do?”

“Why do you want to do that?”

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“What makes you so excited about it?”

“How long has that been your dream?”

You need this information the help you with the following steps.

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3. Encourage

This is the most important step, because starting a dream is scary. People are so scared they will fail or look stupid, many never try to reach their goals, so this is where you come in. You must encourage them. Say things like, “I think you will be great at that.” Better yet, say, “I think your skills in X will help you succeed.” For example if you have a friend who wants to own a pet store, say, “You are so great with animals, I think you will be excellent at running a pet store.”

4. Ask About What the First Step Will Be

After you’ve encouraged them, find how they will start. If they don’t know, you can make suggestions, but it’s better to let the person figure out the first step themselves so they can be committed to the process.

5. Dream

This is the most fun step, because you can dream about success. Say things like, “Wouldn’t it be cool if your business took off, and you didn’t have to work at that job you hate?” By allowing others to dream, you solidify the motivation in place and connect their dreams to a future reality.

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6. Ask How You Can Help

Most of the time, others won’t need anything from you, but it’s always good to offer. Just letting the person know you’re there will help motivate them to start. And, who knows, maybe your skills can help.

7. Follow Up

Periodically, over the course of the next year, ask them how their goal is going. This way you can find out what progress has been made. You may need to do the seven steps again, or they may need motivation in another area of their life.

Final Thoughts

By following these seven steps, you’ll be able to encourage the people around you to achieve their dreams and goals. In return, you’ll be more passionate about getting to your goals, you’ll be surrounded by successful people, and others will want to help you reach your dreams …

Oh, and you’ll become a motivational super hero. Time to get a cape!

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Featured photo credit: Thought Catalog via unsplash.com

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