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Why Aren’t You Happy? Because You Haven’t Been Asking The Right Questions

Why Aren’t You Happy? Because You Haven’t Been Asking The Right Questions

What really makes you happy? When you are put on the spot and questioned about your happiness, what answers will you give? Happiness is not a destination or a thing, neither is it a substance or an item, rather it is a mindset and an outlook. If you think deeper or ponder on certain subjects, you will find out that being happy is not so farfetched.

After all, the mind is great at wandering for answers that will supply the body with the energy it needs to keep going. To dig deeper and discover what makes you happy and excited, you should ask yourself the following questions:

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What am I most grateful about in my life right now?

Happiness can be born out of contentment and satisfaction. And while many do not see it this way, but are interested in hunting rather than appreciating what they have, you should understand what place gratitude has in your life.

Be grateful and appreciate the feeling of satisfaction that comes with the things you currently have. Is it a decent family? Is it a great career? Is it an assurance of new beginnings or great health? Is it a new environment or a new destination? There is always something to be thankful for and you should start asking yourself what it is.

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Who do you most connect with, and why?

This question is centered on who you love and why you love them. Important relationships define our happiness, as we are social creatures and either want to be accepted or to accept others. Possibly, you are not getting the love you deserve or believe you deserve more. However, your family, friends, or loved ones will always provide you the options for you to answer this question.

If joy became a currency, what career or job do you think would make you wealthy?

Your job satisfaction has a way of contributing to your happiness. But most times many of us seek security and survival rather than aiming for what profession excites us. If you had to make a choice and pick, what occupation would you do for the joy and excitement it affords you?

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What I am committed to in my life right now, and why?

In the long run, what we believe in defines what we are committed to or what will be taking up most of our time and energy. Answering or asking yourself this question makes you realize or mirror what you believe in. Are you committed to your marriage, relationships, career or education, religion, or social interests? Why are you committed to these? What do you hope to gain from being committed to any of these things?

What do I admire in others?

What draws you to others and makes you interested in them. This question mirrors you to yourself, as you are able to realize what your values and personal motivation is. When you learn what you find intriguing and interesting in others, you can find ways to apply such things in your life. When you these, you will be able to find greater happiness in what you do.

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What motivates you, fear or passion?

At the end of the day, only two emotions define your every action — love or fear. Fear drives negative factors, such as focusing on what’s wrong, anger, guilt, shame, and resentment. Passion drives positive factors, such as gratitude, optimism, empowerment, and creativity.

With passion, you want to contribute and make the world better. Know what your motivation is and try to start every day with a task or project that is triggered by your passion rather than your fear.

Featured photo credit: http://www.pixabay.com via pixabay.com

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Casey Imafidon

Specialized in motivation and personal growth, providing advice to make readers fulfilled and spurred on to achieve all that they desire in life.

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Last Updated on June 19, 2019

6 Ways to Be a Successful Risk Taker and Take More Chances

6 Ways to Be a Successful Risk Taker and Take More Chances

I’ve stood on the edge of my own personal cliffs many times. Each time I jumped, something different happened. There were risks that started off great, but eventually faded. There were risks that left me falling until I hit the ground. There were risks that started slow, but built into massive successes.

Every risk is different, but every risk is the same. You need to have some fundamentals ready before you jump, but not too many.

It wouldn’t be a risk if you knew everything that was about to happen, would it? Here’re 6 ways to be a successful risk taker.

1. Understand That Failure Is Going to Happen a Lot

It’s part of life. Everything we do has failure attached to it. All successful people have stories of massive failure attached to them. Thinking that your risk is going to be pain free and run as smooth as silk is insane.

Expect some pain and failure. Actually, expect a lot of it. Expect the sleepless nights with crazy thoughts of insecurity that leave you trembling under the covers. It’s going to happen, no matter how positive you are about the risk you are about to take.

When failure hits, the only options are to keep going or quit. If you expect falling into a meadow of flowers and frolicking unicorns, then you’re going to immediately quit once you realize that getting to that meadow requires you to go through a rock filled cave filled with hungry bats.

2. Trust the Muse

Writing a story isn’t a big risk. It’s really just a risk on my time. So when I start writing a story, I’m scared it will be time wasted. Of course, it never really is. Even if the story doesn’t turn out fabulous, I still practiced.

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When I’ve taken risks in my life, the successful ones always seemed to happen when I followed the muse. Steven Pressfield describes the muse,

“The Muse demands depth. Shallow does not work for her. If we’re seeking her help, we can’t stay in the kiddie end. When we work, we have to go hard and go deep.”

The muse is a goddess who wants our attention and wants us to work on our passion.

If you’re taking a risk in anything, it’s assumed that there is some passion built up behind that risk. That passion, deep inside you, is the muse. Trust it, focus on it, listen to it.

The most successful articles and stories I write are the ones I’ve focused all my attention on. There were no interruptions during their creative development. I didn’t check my phone or go watch my Twitter feed. I was fully engaged in my work.

Trust the muse, focus your attention on your risk, let the ideas and path develop themselves, and leave the distractions at the side of the road.

3. Remember to Be Authentic

Taking a risk and then turning into something you’re not, is only going to lead to disaster. Whether you are risking a new relationship or new opportunity, you must be yourself throughout the entire process.

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How many times have you acted like you loved something just because the men or woman you just started going out with loved it?

For example, I’m not an office worker. I have an incredibly hard time working in a confined timeline (ie. 9-5). That’s why I write. I can do it whenever the mood strikes, I don’t have somebody breathing down my neck, telling me that I’m five minutes late, or missed a comma somewhere. I don’t have to walk on eggshells wondering if what I’m writing will get me fired or make me lose a promotion. I can just be myself, period.

One girlfriend didn’t understand that. She believed solely in the 9-5 motto, specifically something in human resources because that was a very stable job. I was scared for my future, but I stuck with the relationship because of my own insecurities and acted like I would do it to make her happy.

Here’s a tip: NEVER take away from your happiness to make somebody else satisfied (note I didn’t say happy).

Making somebody else happy will make you happy. Doing something to satisfy somebody is murder on your soul.

4. Don’t Take Any Risks While You’re Not Clearheaded

I’d been considering the risk for a couple weeks. It all sounded good. I was 22 and I could be rich in a couple of years. That’s what they were selling me, anyways.

One night, while at a house party with some friends, I found myself at a computer. A couple of my friends were standing nearby and asked me what I was doing. I told them I was considering starting my own business and it was only going to cost me $1,500.

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Of course, when a bunch of drunk people are surrounded by more drunk people, things get enthusiastic. It sounded like the best business venture in the world to everybody, including me. So I signed up and gave them my credit card number.

A few painful months and close to $4,000 dollars lost later, I quit the business. I was young and fell into the pyramid scheme trap. It was an expensive drunk decision.

Drinking heavily and making decisions has a proven track record of failure. So when you have something important to decide, don’t let your emotions take over your brain.

5. Fully Understand What You’re Risking

It was the start of my baseball comeback. I got a tryout with a professional scout and killed it. After the tryout, he talked to my girlfriend and myself, making sure we understood I would be gone for up to 6 months at a time. That strain on the relationship could be tough.

We understood. I left to play ball, chose to stay in the city I played in, and a year later we broke up. Not because of baseball, see point 3 above. Taking big risks can have massive impacts on everything in your life from relationships to money. Know what you’re risking before you take the risk.

If you believe the risk will be worth it or you have the support you need from your family, then go ahead and make the leap.

You can get more guidance on how to take calculated risks from this article: How to Take Calculated Risk to Achieve More and Become Successful

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6. Remember This Is Your One Shot Only

As far as we know officially, this is our one shot at life, so why not take some risks?

The top thing people are saddened by on their deathbeds are these regrets. They wish they did more, asked that girl in the coffee shop out, spoke out when they should have, or did what they were passionate about.

Don’t regret. Learn and experience. Live. Take the risks you believe in. Be yourself and make the world a better place.

Now go ahead, take that risk and be successful at it!

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Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

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