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9 Hidden Life Lessons In Star Wars That You Need To Know!

9 Hidden Life Lessons In Star Wars That You Need To Know!

“In a galaxy far, far, away…”

As the world anticipates the return of the Millennium Falcon and Han Solo, let’s reflect on the wisdom of the Jedi, The Force, and the Sith Lord himself, in order to glean nine lessons Star Wars teaches us about life.

Star Wars Yoda

    1. Commit to the life you want to live – and live it!

    “Do or do not… there is no try.” – Yoda in The Empire Strikes Back

    We can spend our entire lives debating this and that, frozen in fear, fighting uncertainty. However, in life, nothing is certain. We can either waste precious time in limbo or make a decision and stick with it!

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    Star Wars Darth

      2. Surround yourself with people who are supportive and believe in you.

      “I find your lack of faith disturbing.” – Darth Vader in A New Hope

      There is absolutely no reason to waste your time and energy on people who bring you down. Rather, fill your life with the believers and doers, people who inspire you and bring positive energy to your life. Otherwise, you may resort to the dark side…

      Star Wars Yoda

        3. Don’t lie to yourself. We usually already know what the right thing to do is.

        “Already know you, that which you need.” – Yoda

        Listen to your heart, The Force, and your conscience. Listen to that Yoda voice you hear as you fall asleep or the nagging thoughts that simply won’t go away. Though the road ahead seems perilous, the solution is within.

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        Star Wars Han Solo

          4. Don’t let impossible odds hold you back.

          C-3PO: “Sir, the possibility of successfully navigating an asteroid field is approximately 3,720 to 1.”

          “Never tell me the odds.” – Han Solo in The Empire Strikes Back

          Even if an asteroid field is hurling towards you and your odds of success are 3,720 to 1, don’t let this daunting ratio prevent you from following your heart.

          Star Wars Obi

            5. Often success stems from overcoming failures.

            “Strike me down and I will become more powerful than you can possibly imagine.” – Obi- Wan Kenobi in A New Hope

            Success cannot flourish without hard work. It is found only through trial and error, profound dedication, and the ability to see setbacks as stepping stones towards later victory.

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            Star Wars Yoda Quote

              6. Don’t let fear guide your life.

              “Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.” – Yoda in The Phantom Menace

              Fear cripples us from doing what needs to be done. It prevents us from becoming the people we’re meant to be. It isolates us from others and makes us scared of those we do not understand. Historically speaking, fear has fueled many wars, genocides, persecutions, and riots. Clearly, Yoda was onto something.

              Star Wars

                7. Humor goes a long way.

                (as garbage compactor closes in) “One thing’s for sure, we’re all gonna be a lot thinner.” – Han Solo in A New  Hope

                When things get tough, it’s natural to freak out. However, freaking out isn’t the most productive or efficient way to solve a problem. Humor lightens the mood and allows everyone time to regroup and reassess the situation. It also keeps spirits high, enabling people to do what needs to be done. Plus, girls dig a guy who can crack a joke every now and again.

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                Star Wars Focus

                  8. Our thoughts and actions impact our future.

                  “Always remember, your focus determines your reality.” – Qui-Gon Jinn in The Phantom Menace.

                  What we spend our days thinking about, and actively pursuing, directly affects our future (for better or worse). Considering this, we should invest our time and energy into the things and people we’re passionate about, and the dreams we have, rather than focusing on the negative or filling our lives with empty distractions.

                  Star Wars Vader

                    9. Sometimes we just need to let it go.

                    “Let go of your hate.” – Luke Skywalker in Return of the Jedi

                    There is no room for hate, fear, and regret in our lives. Often, we just need to let it go so that we may finally be free.

                    Featured photo credit: What’s Your Favorite Star Wars Poster?/ Ant-Man via flickr.com

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                    Published on May 4, 2021

                    How To Spot Fake People (And Ways To Deal With Them)

                    How To Spot Fake People (And Ways To Deal With Them)

                    They say we are the average of the five persons we spend the most time with. For a minute, consider the people around you. Are they truly who your “tribe” should be or who you aspire to become in the future? Are they really genuine people who want to see you succeed? Or are they fake people who don’t really want to see you happy?

                    In this article, I’ll review why it is important to surround yourself with genuine individuals—the ones who care, bring something to our table, and first and foremost, who leave all fakeness behind.

                    How to Spot Fake People?

                    When you’ve been working in the helping professions for a while, spotting fake people gets a bit easier. There are some very clear signs that the person you are looking at is hiding something, acting somehow, or simply wanting to get somewhere. Most often, there is a secondary gain—perhaps attention, sympathy, or even a promotion.

                    Whatever it is, you’re better off working their true agenda and staying the hell away. Here are some things you should look out for to help spot fake people.

                    1. Full of Themselves

                    Fake people like to show off. They love looking at themselves in the mirror. They collect photos and videos of every single achievement they had and every part of their body and claim to be the “best at what they do.”

                    Most of these people are actually not that good in real life. But they act like they are and ensure that they appear better than the next person. The issue for you is that you may find yourself always feeling “beneath” them and irritated at their constant need to be in the spotlight.

                    2. Murky in Expressing Their Emotions

                    Have you ever tried having a deep and meaningful conversation with a fake person? It’s almost impossible. It’s because they have limited emotional intelligence and don’t know how they truly feel deep down—and partly because they don’t want to have their true emotions exposed, no matter how normal these might be.

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                    It’s much harder to say “I’m the best at what I do” while simultaneously sharing “average” emotions with “equal” people.

                    3. Zero Self-Reflection

                    To grow, we must accept feedback from others. We must be open to our strengths and to our weaknesses. We must accept that we all come in different shapes and can always improve.

                    Self-reflection requires us to think, forgive, admit fault, and learn from our mistakes. But to do that, we have to be able to adopt a level of genuineness and depth that fake people don’t routinely have. A fake person generally never apologizes, but when they do, it is often followed with a “but” in the next breath.

                    4. Unrealistic Perceptions

                    Fake people most often have an unrealistic perception of the world—things that they want to portray to others (pseudo achievements, materialistic gains, or a made-up sense of happiness) or simply how they genuinely regard life outside themselves.

                    A lot of fake people hide pain, shame, and other underlying reasons in their behavior. This could explain why they can’t be authentic and/or have difficulties seeing their environment for the way it objectively is (both good and bad).

                    5. Love Attention

                    As I mentioned earlier, the biggest sign that something isn’t quite right with someone’s behavior can be established by how much they love attention. Are you being interrupted every time you speak by someone who wants to make sure that the spotlight gets reverted back to them? Is the focus always on them, no matter the topic? If yes, you’re probably dealing with a fake person.

                    6. People Pleaser

                    Appreciation feels nice but having everyone like you is even better. While it is completely unrealistic for most people to please everyone all the time, fake people seem to always say yes in pursuit of constant approval.

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                    Now, this is a problem for two reasons. Firstly, these people are simply saying yes to things for their own satisfaction. Secondly, they often end up changing their minds or retracting their offer for one reason or another (“I would have loved to, but my grandmother suddenly fell ill.”), leaving you in the lurch for the 100th time this year.

                    7. Sarcasm and Cynicism

                    Behind the chronic pasted smile, fake people are well known for brewing resentment, jealousy, or anger. This is because, behind the postcard life, they are often unhappy. Sarcasm and cynicism are well known to act as a defense mechanism, sometimes even a diversion—anything so they can remain feeling on top of the world, whether it is through boosting themselves or bringing people down.

                    8. Crappy friend

                    Fake people are bad friends. They don’t listen to you, your feelings, and whatever news you might have to share. In fact, you might find yourself migrating away from them when you have exciting or bad news to share, knowing that it will always end up one way—their way. In addition, you might find that they’re not available when you truly need them or worse, cancel plans at the last minute.

                    It’s not unusual to hear that a fake person talks constantly behind people’s backs. Let’s be honest, if they do it to others, they’re doing it to you too. If your “friend” makes you feel bad constantly, trust me, they’re not achieving their purpose, and they’re simply not a good person to have around.

                    The sooner you learn to spot these fake people, the sooner you can meet meaningful individuals again.

                    How to Cope With Fake People Moving Forward?

                    It is important to remind yourself that you deserve more than what you’re getting. You are worthy, valuable, precious, and just as important as the next person.

                    There are many ways to manage fake people. Here are some tips on how to deal with them.

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                    1. Boundaries

                    Keep your boundaries very clear. As explained in the book Unlock Your Resilience, boundaries are what keep you sane when the world tries to suffocate you. When fake people become emotional vampires, make sure to keep your distances, limit contact, and simply replace them with more valuable interactions.

                    2. Don’t Take Their Behavior Personally

                    Sadly, they most likely have behaved this way before they knew you and will continue much longer after you have moved on. It isn’t about you. It is about their inner need to meet a void that you are not responsible for. And in all honesty, unless you are a trained professional, you are unlikely to improve it anyway.

                    3. Be Upfront and Honest About How You Feel

                    If your “friend” has been hurtful or engaged in behaviors you struggle with, let them know—nicely, firmly, however you want, but let them know that they are affecting you. If it works, great. If it doesn’t, you’ll feel better and when you’re ready to move on, you’ll know you tried to reach out. Your conscience is clear.

                    4. Ask for Advice

                    If you’re unsure about what you’re seeing or feeling, ask for advice. Perhaps a relative, a good friend, or a colleague might have some input as to whether you are overreacting or seeing some genuine concerns.

                    Now, don’t confuse asking for advice with gossiping behind the fake person’s back because, in the end, you don’t want to stoop down to their level. However, a little reminder as to how to stay on your own wellness track can never hurt.

                    5. Dig Deeper

                    Now, this one, I offer with caution. If you are emotionally strong, up to it, guaranteed you won’t get sucked into it, and have the skills to manage, perhaps you could dig into the reasons a fake person is acting the way they do.

                    Have they suffered recent trauma? Have they been rejected all their lives? Is their self-esteem so low that they must resort to making themselves feel good in any way they can? Sometimes, having an understanding of a person’s behavior can help in processing it.

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                    6. Practice Self-Care!

                    Clearly, putting some distance between the fake person and yourself is probably the way to go. However, sometimes, it takes time to get there. In the meantime, make sure to practice self-care, be gentle with yourself, and compensate with lots of positives!

                    Self-care can be as simple as taking a hot shower after talking to them or declining an invitation when you’re not feeling up to the challenge.

                    Spotting fake people isn’t too hard. They generally glow with wanna-be vibes. However, most often, there are reasons as to why they are like this. Calling their behavior might be the first step. Providing them with support might be the second. But if these don’t work, it’s time to stay away and surround yourself with the positivity that you deserve.

                    Final Thoughts

                    Remember that life is a rollercoaster. It has good moments, tough moments, and moments you wouldn’t change for the world. So, look around and make sure that you take the time to choose the right people to share it all with.

                    We are the average of the five people we spend the most time with, so take a good look around and choose wisely!

                    More Tips on Dealing With Fake People

                    Featured photo credit: Priscilla Du Preez via unsplash.com

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