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8 Signs You Have A Strong Personality That Might Scare Some People

8 Signs You Have A Strong Personality That Might Scare Some People

When people encounter someone with a strong personality, they don’t understand the kind of person they are dealing with.

Some people think you dominate. Some just think you are rude. But none of these are the truth. These words actually do not reflect your personality at all. In fact, strong people are often kittens on the inside. It’s just that people with domineering personalities just give you a bad rep.

Strong people do not have to win, they just are not willing to let other people walk all over them on the outside.

Sure, some people might be afraid of you. But that is only because they do not understand how you can be so comfortable with yourself that you do not need anyone else to validate you.

Here are eight signs that you have a strong personality that might scare some people.

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You Don’t Put Up With Excuses

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    Strong personalities do not put up with excuses. When you have a strong personality, you’re not willing to listen to people waste time whining about what they can do. You would rather focus on what you can do and how you can overcome obstacles to do more.

    Don’t question yourself for not making excuses. There might be a lot of reasons that you can’t do something but there are more reasons that you can.

    You Are Careful About Who You Let Into Your Life

    As a strong person, you do not rely on other people to tell you who you are, what you are or what you can do. You recognize that some people need to do that to make themselves feel better. You also recognize that some people need to hear these things to feel whole.

    Even if you don’t yet know exactly who you are, you know that you do not need a boyfriend, girlfriend, boss, best friend or family member to tell you what you’re capable of. You can figure that out on your own.

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    You Hate Small Talk

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      Small talk is terrible. If you have a strong personality, you have a lot of ideas. You do not want to waste time talking about people when you could be changing the world.

      You Can’t Stand Insensitivity, Idiocy or Ignorance

      Dominating personalities come from a lack of influence or knowledge. Strong personalities are the result of being thoughtful and well-informed. There is a huge difference between the two.

      Because you have put time and effort into using your brain for good, you hate it when people make instant judgements about things they do not know anything about. This is probably your best quality but not because you can use your knowledge to influence people. It is because you can use it to encourage people to actually think about what they say before it falls out of their mouth.

      You Know How to Listen

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        People with strong personalities know how to listen. You might think that people would appreciate this. But in reality, being heard and encouraged actually terrifies people who are not used to it.

        You Do Not Need Attention

        Having this type of personality means that you do not need attention. Most people that you encounter think that you thrive on it but this is not the truth. It just that your personality attracts people to you. The amount of socializing you do is not because you want to do it but because people need people like you around.

        Despite this perception, you still need time to recharge. Don’t be afraid to take it. It is just as important to take care of yourself as it is to take care of other people.

        You Are Fearless

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          Okay, this one is not true. There is probably one thing that you are afraid of. But the difference between you and other people is that you do not let this fear dictate the way you live your life.

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          You Take Insecurity As An Opportunity

          Insecurity for you is an opportunity to do better. You know you’re not perfect but if you are not trying to learn and evolve, despite the risk of looking like a fool, then you are not living. You are just existing.

          They say everyone is insecure and this is probably true. But not everyone has to stop this insecurity from letting them live their life and own the things that they are insecure about.

          Sure, some people think that people with big personalities are difficult to be around. But you’re only difficult to be around because you challenge other people to be the best version of themselves! If this is what being difficult is like than you already know that it is best to just keep being you.

          photo credit: Pinterest

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          Last Updated on August 6, 2020

          6 Reasons Why You Should Think Before You Speak

          6 Reasons Why You Should Think Before You Speak

          We’ve all done it. That moment when a series of words slithers from your mouth and the instant regret manifests through blushing and profuse apologies. If you could just think before you speak! It doesn’t have to be like this, and with a bit of practice, it’s actually quite easy to prevent.

          “Think twice before you speak, because your words and influence will plant the seed of either success or failure in the mind of another.” – Napolean Hill

          Are we speaking the same language?

          My mum recently left me a note thanking me for looking after her dog. She’d signed it with “LOL.” In my world, this means “laugh out loud,” and in her world it means “lots of love.” My kids tell me things are “sick” when they’re good, and ”manck” when they’re bad (when I say “bad,” I don’t mean good!). It’s amazing that we manage to communicate at all.

          When speaking, we tend to color our language with words and phrases that have become personal to us, things we’ve picked up from our friends, families and even memes from the internet. These colloquialisms become normal, and we expect the listener (or reader) to understand “what we mean.” If you really want the listener to understand your meaning, try to use words and phrases that they might use.

          Am I being lazy?

          When you’ve been in a relationship for a while, a strange metamorphosis takes place. People tend to become lazier in the way that they communicate with each other, with less thought for the feelings of their partner. There’s no malice intended; we just reach a “comfort zone” and know that our partners “know what we mean.”

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          Here’s an exchange from Psychology Today to demonstrate what I mean:

          Early in the relationship:

          “Honey, I don’t want you to take this wrong, but I’m noticing that your hair is getting a little thin on top. I know guys are sensitive about losing their hair, but I don’t want someone else to embarrass you without your expecting it.”

          When the relationship is established:

          “Did you know that you’re losing a lot of hair on the back of your head? You’re combing it funny and it doesn’t help. Wear a baseball cap or something if you feel weird about it. Lots of guys get thin on top. It’s no big deal.”

          It’s pretty clear which of these statements is more empathetic and more likely to be received well. Recognizing when we do this can be tricky, but with a little practice it becomes easy.

          Have I actually got anything to say?

          When I was a kid, my gran used to say to me that if I didn’t have anything good to say, I shouldn’t say anything at all. My gran couldn’t stand gossip, so this makes total sense, but you can take this statement a little further and modify it: “If you don’t have anything to say, then don’t say anything at all.”

          A lot of the time, people speak to fill “uncomfortable silences,” or because they believe that saying something, anything, is better than staying quiet. It can even be a cause of anxiety for some people.

          When somebody else is speaking, listen. Don’t wait to speak. Listen. Actually hear what that person is saying, think about it, and respond if necessary.

          Am I painting an accurate picture?

          One of the most common forms of miscommunication is the lack of a “referential index,” a type of generalization that fails to refer to specific nouns. As an example, look at these two simple phrases: “Can you pass me that?” and “Pass me that thing over there!”. How often have you said something similar?

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          How is the listener supposed to know what you mean? The person that you’re talking to will start to fill in the gaps with something that may very well be completely different to what you mean. You’re thinking “pass me the salt,” but you get passed the pepper. This can be infuriating for the listener, and more importantly, can create a lack of understanding and ultimately produce conflict.

          Before you speak, try to label people, places and objects in a way that it is easy for any listeners to understand.

          What words am I using?

          It’s well known that our use of nouns and verbs (or lack of them) gives an insight into where we grew up, our education, our thoughts and our feelings.

          Less well known is that the use of pronouns offers a critical insight into how we emotionally code our sentences. James Pennebaker’s research in the 1990’s concluded that function words are important keys to someone’s psychological state and reveal much more than content words do.

          Starting a sentence with “I think…” demonstrates self-focus rather than empathy with the speaker, whereas asking the speaker to elaborate or quantify what they’re saying clearly shows that you’re listening and have respect even if you disagree.

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          Is the map really the territory?

          Before speaking, we sometimes construct a scenario that makes us act in a way that isn’t necessarily reflective of the actual situation.

          A while ago, John promised to help me out in a big way with a project that I was working on. After an initial meeting and some big promises, we put together a plan and set off on its execution. A week or so went by, and I tried to get a hold of John to see how things were going. After voice mails and emails with no reply and general silence, I tried again a week later and still got no response.

          I was frustrated and started to get more than a bit vexed. The project obviously meant more to me than it did to him, and I started to construct all manner of crazy scenarios. I finally got through to John and immediately started a mild rant about making promises you can’t keep. He stopped me in my tracks with the news that his brother had died. If I’d have just thought before I spoke…

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