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System Overload: How to Deal With Feeling Overwhelmed

System Overload: How to Deal With Feeling Overwhelmed

We live in a world riddled by choice — the first world, that is. There is so much opportunity at our fingertips, it makes decisions sometimes seem impossible. The more uncertain we are about our choices, the more our system becomes overloaded and overwhelmed.

Too many choices lead to overwhelm and indecision, which leads to self-doubt. We feel out of control, stressed, anxious, useless or worse — depressed. Most of the problems we create are out of sheer boredom. Our lives are too easy and too convenient that we end up catastrophising the smallest things, creating big, scary monsters that make us feel out of control.

How do I know if I’m making the right choice? What if I miss out on something? What if I make this decision, and it blows up in my face? We can drown ourselves in questions, but until we actually take the plunge, we will never know what’s on the other side.

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Building self-awareness allows us to make hard choices and stick to them. There are no bad decisions, there are the ones we believe in and the ones we don’t — in the end, it’s all a learning experience.

Here are a few tricks to protect yourself from total system combustion:

1. Box breathe.

It seems simple, but we often forget, especially when we’re feeling overwhelmed. Long, slow deep breaths. It grounds us in times of uncertainty. The breath is our anchor to presence. In through your nose for 1, 2, 3, 4. Holding for 1, 2, 3, 4 and exhaling through nose for 1,2,3,4 and holding for 1,2,3,4. It’s called box breathing and it has been used by all walks of life from yogis to firefighters to soldiers. Leave a post-it note somewhere you can see it to remind yourself to just breathe.

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2. Write your thoughts down when feeling overwhelmed.

Your writing doesn’t have to be the next New York Times bestseller. It doesn’t really need to make sense. When we’re overwhelmed, we don’t think clearly and our emotions can often become erratic and all over the place. When we take those erratic emotions and throw them onto a page, we can then look at them as an outsider looking in — from a different perspective.

Thoughts take us down darker and darker rabbit holes when we keep them locked inside. In Brene Brown’s new book Rising Strong she calls this exercise an SFD — Shitty First Draft. Write down the emotions you’re feeling, how they’re manifesting in your body and what you’re thinking about. Write for about 15-20 minutes. Once you’ve cooled off, take time to reflect on what you wrote and what you can do differently next time.

3. Prioritize.

Make a list of what matters most when you’re feeling overwhelmed. Simple, yes. Effective, yes. You just have to actually do it. This can also be part of your writing therapy. It will help you decide what really needs to happen now and what can wait. We can’t do everything at once. We think that we’re really good at multitasking, when we’re just giving ourselves the opportunity to screw up more than one thing at a time. Read the book The One Thing by Gary Keller and you’ll understand what I mean.

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4. Trust yourself.

It’s important to work on building enough courage to pick yourself up after you’ve fallen down. You’re overwhelmed because you can’t make a decision. Just make one and go with it! The circumstances don’t change, we either believe in the choices we make or we don’t. Watch this TED on How to Make Hard Choices.

5. Replace FOMO with JOMO.

Our fear of missing out has us saying YES when we should be saying NO in order to fulfil expectations we put on ourselves or the fear built around letting someone else down. This can cause you to feel overwhelmed. It’s important to be authentic and self-aware when identifying the right times to buy in or bow down.

Brene Brown said it best, “Every time we say yes because we’re afraid of missing out, we say NO to something. That something may be a big dream or a short nap. We need both.”

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Replace FOMO with JOMO — The Joy of Missing Out.

6. Break your state.

When we’re feeling overwhelmed, we’re just thinking about me, me, me, me. We need to get out of our heads and over ourselves. The best way to do that is to break your state. Make a fart noise with your mouth or bark like a dog. Just do something ridiculous to get yourself out of your head.

And remember when you’re feeling overwhelmed, choice is a blessing, not a curse.

Featured photo credit: 184; Stress level: Midnight/Sara V. via flickr.com

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Last Updated on June 13, 2019

How to Quit Your Boring Life and Start Living an Interesting One

How to Quit Your Boring Life and Start Living an Interesting One

Think you have a boring life?

The definition of boring is dull or not interesting. Maybe you’ve been doing the same thing and living the same life for too long, or maybe your daily routine is limiting your growth and happiness. Whatever your reason is, the following list of 20 things can definitely make any day more interesting. Some of them are silly, while some are more meaningful, so hopefully just reading the list makes your life less boring and sparks your creativity.

Let’s dive in the list to quit your boring life and start living an interesting (and meaning) one!

1. Channel Your 7-Year-Old Self

What would he or she want to do right now? Color? Paint? Run around outside? Play dress up? Eat with your hands? Play that instrument hiding in the back of your closet that you haven’t touched in years?

Just because you’re a grown up doesn’t mean any of this stuff will be less enjoyable than you remember it. Give yourself permission to play.

2. Go Play with Kids

Speaking of little kids, if you have your own or access to any (in a non-creepy way, like they’re your niece or your best friend’s kid, you get the idea) go play with them!

They didn’t create an entire show called Kids Say The Darndest Things because kids aren’t hilarious. They also keep things so simple, and we can really stand to be reminded of this and stop allowing ourselves to get bogged down in boring details.

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3. Order a Hot Dog

While you’re eating it, Google: “What’s in a hot dog?” You decide whether or not you want to finish it.

4. For the Ladies: Wear Your Sexiest Lingerie Under Your Work Clothes

Your “little secret” will leave you feeling anything but boring all day!

5. Play Cell Phone Roulette

You’ll need at least one buddy for this. Scroll through the contacts in your phone, stop on a random one and call the person.

You could spark an incredible catch up session or be incredibly awkward. Neither are boring.

6. Fill out a Pack of Thank-You Cards

Give them to random people who probably don’t get thanked too often for doing what they do ever day.

Ideas: police officers, librarians, servers, baristas, cab drivers, sanitation workers, teachers, people behind any check out counter, receptionists, your friends, the guy at the falafel stand, etc.

7. Sign up for a Class in Something You’ve “Always Wanted to Do”, or Something That Makes You Really Uncomfortable

Ideas: pole dancing, salsa lessons, improv, pottery, cooking, knitting (yup, there are classes for this, too!), karate, boxing, something techy like the workshops they run in Apple stores, get Rosetta Stone and learn that language you’ve always wanted to speak, etc.

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What’s good about joining an interest class is that you will also meet new people!

8. Interview Your Grandparents About Their Lives

You can bet they’ve had some crazy experiences you probably never knew about.

9. Get up on Stage at an Open Mic Night

Whether you’re funny or not, get up on stage and just talk funny. And if you’re not, memorize a few of your favorite jokes and tell those!

10. Do Something for Someone Else That You Wish Someone Would Do for You

We all have a few ideas on this list. I promise you will feel amazing after and anything but bored.

11. Start a DIY Project in Your Home

It doesn’t have to be super complicated. If you need ideas, there’re plenty on Pinterest. Or you can also check out these 30 Awesome DIY Projects that You’ve Never Heard of.

12. Plan a Weekend Trip or an All-Out Vacation

This will give you something to look forward to.

Even if you don’t have the time or money to go on a vacation, plan for a staycation, which is same fun and relaxing!

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13. People Watch

Find a bench in a crowded area (centers of transportation like airports, bus stops and train stations are great for this!) and just observe.

People are infinitely interesting.

14. Eat Something You’ve Never Eaten Before

Bonus points if it’s a random fruit or veggie.

15. Dance

You can get your friends together for a night on the town or just pull up a video on YouTube and bust a move from your own living room.

If you’re feeling extra brave, you can even dance in public and get other people involved.

16. Go to YOUTUBE and Search “Funny Pets” or “Funny Babies”

This is also a great quickie ab workout as you will be laughing hysterically.

17. Pick up a Book and Start Reading

Check out the NY Times Best Sellers lists and grab a new book you can get lost in.

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18. Step Away from the Computer and Go Get Some Time with People You Care About in Real Life

Facebook stalking doesn’t count as real social interaction. You can even share this post with your friends and vote on which one you’d like to do together!

19. Check out a Museum You’ve Never Been to Before

OK, depending on your interests, this one might actually be boring. If you love learning, art or different cultures though, this one is for you!

20. Write a List of Things You Desire and Truly Want

This is a great way to help you figure out the real reason why you’re feeling bored about your life. Maybe you haven’t really done things that you truly enjoy? Maybe what you’ve wanted to do all the time has been left behind?

Think about the list of things you really want to do, and ask yourself why you aren’t doing these things (yet). Then start taking your first step to make what you want happen.

Now go make your life interesting and live your dream life!

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Featured photo credit: Kev Costello via unsplash.com

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