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20 Simple Ways To Fall In Love With Your Life Again

20 Simple Ways To Fall In Love With Your Life Again

Think about the best phase of your life.  What did it look like?  What made it different?  Somewhere in the mix of life, the colors can lose their brilliance.  No worries…it happens to the most of us.  Here are 20 things you can do to add some pizzaz into your life.  Warning: these suggestions are extremely easy to implement and have the power to change your outlook!

1. Take a walk through the park

Find a nice park around you and just take a stroll.  As cliche as it sounds, it might just add a spring to your step.  Bring yourself back to the simplicity of life by walking through a non-commercialized zone.  Soak in the greenery and fill your lungs with fresh air.

2. Set a measurable goal for time of silence

This is a bit crazy…but we really do have to set apart time for silence.  The world is getting louder and louder, so we have to be intentional about giving our bodies silence daily.  Start small and ease yourself into it.  Set a timer for 15 minutes so you don’t have to think about when to stop.  Quiet your thoughts and sit or lie down in a wakeful state of silence.

3. Eat 2 more servings of vegetables than usual

We all know that we feel better when we eat well, so give your body a boost.  Pick a day of the week and add 2 more servings of vegetables than you normally would.  Don’t get too ambitious if this is not natural for you.  Stick to the extra servings just once a week.  Then, after it’s a weekly habit, you can a day at a time.

4. Eat something indulgent on purpose (guilt-free)

There’s always some part of us that wants to indulge in a sweet dessert or less-than-healthy treat.  I just ate a Key-Lime Cheesecake.  I worked hard today and gave myself a treat.  Keep it special.  Know you will only do this occasionally and enjoy the treat.

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5. Watch a comedy

Life is too serious sometimes.  Watch outrageous comedy.  Step outside your situation and watch life from the lens of a comedian.  Find the humor in the mundane.

6. Learn how to bake

Baking requires meticulous technique and whimsical imagination.  Immerse yourself in something that will work your brain in a different way and then make someone else happy with the things you’ve created.

7. Build something with your hands

Just like baking, any kind of craft made with your hands injects a very organic energy into your life.  Find a project that does not require much time or energy, preferably something you can complete in a couple hours.  There’s an innate need to create in all of us.

8. Make a list

This one is a bit more concrete and practical.  Make a list of things that make you feel stuck and see what you can eliminate.  Do this twice a year and whenever you feel stuck and stale.  Some factors are out of our control, but there are some things we can change.  So we should.

9. Call an old friend

What was the best friend era you ever had?  Call one of those friends.  Connect over the phone.  In this digital age, it is so special to actually receive a call from an old friend.  Get nostalgic and lose yourself a bit.  It might even inspire a spark in you.

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10. Forgive someone

This is so powerful.  Do you hold any grudges?  Free yourself.  That negative energy does not serve you.  Release that power and don’t worry about the other person.

11. Do something completely selfless

Focus on someone else.  When you help others, you benefit too.  Yes, you do need to make sure that you are healthy, but you don’t need to be perfect to help others.  Just a little act of selflessness can ripple many other kind acts.

12. Create a safe space

Where do you go when you feel drained, exhausted, upset, or happy?  Find a physical space in your home that will absorb all these emotions.  It doesn’t have to be fancy, just somewhere you can peel back the layers and just be.

13. Get a new Duvet Cover or Comforter

Home design shows have put a reno bug in all of us.  Unfortunately, we can’t renovate our homes every couple years.  What’s the next best thing?  Freshen up your space with things that change the landscape of your room.  Try a fresh new duvet cover, shower curtain, or towels.  A $100 solution to hold you over till the next big change.

14. Try a new food

My grocery bags look the same week after week.  I have to go out of my way to get some new flavors on my tastebuds.  Keep life interesting.  Try one new food every week.  A snack, take out, whatever you want.  Expand your palate.

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15. Watch a documentary

Get immersed in something bigger than yourself.  Find a cause or phenomenon that interests you and then binge watch about it.  You just never know what it will lead to.

16. Join a Book Club

Even if you’re not a big reader, it’s good to hear other people’s perspectives on the same work of art.  Choose a group and remember that you are not committed for life.  Just try it.

17. Clear out your closet

Cleanse the staleness out of your life starting from the 10 year old pants you never wear.  Remove unused clothing every 6 months.  Make it a habit not to purchase more hangers when you buy new clothing.  Maintain the size of your wardrobe by getting rid of something when you add an item.

18. Keep your counters clean

It’s so easy to place something on an empty countertop.  Resist the urge to clutter your space.  Make it a goal to remove any non permanent items (like mail) every day or every couple days, at the most.

19. Cut Down Your Daily Goals

Do you get overwhelmed with all you’d like to do?  Most people don’t do all they’d like to because of overwhelm paralysis.  Try this for a month.  Just focus on 1 goal for each day (other than daily tasks).  What is the one thing you can focus on today.  When you make a goal, remember to keep it measurable and specific.  Small goals will help you get to your larger goals.

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20. Smile

Often and everywhere.  Smile because there is a lot to be thankful for.  Smile because you are alive.  Smile because you can brighten another’s day.  Of course, smiling’s best friend is laughter, so laugh often, too.

What do you think?  Which one of these will you start doing this week?  If you start feeling really good about your life again, just smile.

Featured photo credit: Mitya Ku via flickr.com

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Last Updated on September 18, 2020

13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

For the original article by Celestine: 13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

“We all have problems. The way we solve them is what makes us different.” ~Unknown

“It’s not stress that kills us, it is our reaction to it.” – Hans Selye

Have you ever experienced moments when things just don’t go your way? For example, losing your keys, accidentally spilling your drink, waking up late, missing your buses/trains, forgetting to bring your things, and so on?

You’re not alone. All of us, myself included, experience times when things don’t go as we expect.

Here is my guide on how to deal with daily setbacks.

1. Take a step back and evaluate

When something bad happens, take a step back and evaluate the situation. Some questions to ask yourself:

  1. What is the problem?
  2. Are you the only person facing this problem in the world today?
  3. How does this problem look like at an individual level? A national level? On a global scale?
  4. What’s the worst possible thing that can happen to you as a result of this?
  5. How is it going to impact your life in the next 1 year? 5 years? 10 years?

Doing this exercise is not to undermine the problem or disclaiming responsibility, but to consider different perspectives, so you can adopt the best approach for it. Most problems we encounter daily may seem like huge issues when they crop up, but most, if not all, don’t have much impact in our life beyond that day.

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2. Vent if you have to, but don’t linger on the problem

If you feel very frustrated and need to let off some steam, go ahead and do that. Talk to a friend, complain, crib about it, or scream at the top of your lungs if it makes you happy.

At the same time, don’t get caught up with venting. While venting may temporarily relieve yourself, it’s not going to solve the problem ultimately. You don’t want to be an energy vampire.

Vent if there’s a need to, but do it for 15 to 20 minutes. Then move on.

3. Realize there are others out there facing this too

Even though the situation may be frustrating, you’re not alone. Remember there are almost 7 billion people in the world today, and chances are that other people have faced the same thing before too. Knowing it’s not just you helps you to get out of a self-victimizing mindset.

4. Process your thoughts/emotions

Process your thoughts/emotions with any of the four methods:

  1. Journal. Write your unhappiness in a private diary or in your blog. It doesn’t have to be formal at all – it can be a brain dump on rough paper or new word document. Delete after you are done.
  2. Audio taping. Record yourself as you talk out what’s on your mind. Tools include tape recorder, your PC (Audacity is a freeware for recording/editing audio) and your mobile (most mobiles today have audio recording functions). You can even use your voice mail for this. Just talking helps you to gain awareness of your emotions. After recording, play back and listen to what you said. You might find it quite revealing.
  3. Meditation. At its simplest form, meditation is just sitting/lying still and observing your reality as it is – including your thoughts and emotions. Some think that it involves some complex mambo-jumbo, but it doesn’t.
  4. Talking to someone. Talking about it with someone helps you work through the issue. It also gets you an alternate viewpoint and consider it from a different angle.

5. Acknowledge your thoughts

Don’t resist your thoughts, but acknowledge them. This includes both positive and negative thoughts.

By acknowledging, I mean recognizing these thoughts exist. So if say, you have a thought that says, “Wow, I’m so stupid!”, acknowledge that. If you have a thought that says, “I can’t believe this is happening to me again”, acknowledge that as well.

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Know that acknowledging the thoughts doesn’t mean you agree with them. It’s simply recognizing the existence of said thoughts so that you can stop resisting yourself and focus on the situation on hand.

6. Give yourself a break

If you’re very stressed out by the situation, and the problem is not time sensitive, then give yourself a break. Take a walk, listen to some music, watch a movie, or get some sleep. When you’re done, you should feel a lot more revitalized to deal with the situation.

7. Uncover what you’re really upset about

A lot of times, the anger we feel isn’t about the world. You may start off feeling angry at someone or something, but at the depth of it, it’s anger toward yourself.

Uncover the root of your anger. I have written a five part anger management series on how to permanently overcome anger.

After that, ask yourself: How can you improve the situation? Go to Step #9, where you define your actionable steps. Our anger comes from not having control on the situation. Sitting there and feeling infuriated is not going to change the situation. The more action we take, the more we will regain control over the situation, the better we will feel.

8. See this as an obstacle to be overcome

As Helen Keller once said,

“Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experiences of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired and success achieved.”

Whatever you’re facing right now, see it as an obstacle to be overcome. In every worthy endeavor, there’ll always be countless obstacles that emerge along the way. These obstacles are what separate the people who make it, and those who don’t. If you’re able to push through and overcome them, you’ll emerge a stronger person than before. It’ll be harder for anything to get you down in the future.

9. Analyze the situation – Focus on actionable steps

In every setback, there are going to be things that can’t be reversed since they have already occurred. You want to focus on things that can still be changed (salvageable) vs. things that have already happened and can’t be changed. The only time the situation changes is when you take steps to improve it. Rather than cry over spilt milk, work through your situation:

  1. What’s the situation?
  2. What’s stressing you about this situation?
  3. What are the next steps that’ll help you resolve them?
  4. Take action on your next steps!

After you have identified your next steps, act on them. The key here is to focus on the actionable steps, not the inactionable steps. It’s about regaining control over the situation through direct action.

10. Identify how it occurred (so it won’t occur again next time)

A lot of times we react to our problems. The problem occurs, and we try to make the best out of what has happened within the context. While developing a healthy coping mechanism is important (which is what the other helping points are on), it’s also equally important, if not more, to understand how the problem arose. This way, you can work on preventing it from taking place next time, vs. dealing reactively with it.

Most of us probably think the problem is outside of our control, but reality is most of the times it’s fully preventable. It’s just a matter of how much responsibility you take over the problem.

For example, for someone who can’t get a cab for work in the morning, he/she may see the problem as a lack of cabs in the country, or bad luck. However, if you trace to the root of the problem, it’s probably more to do with (a) Having unrealistic expectations of the length of time to get a cab. He/she should budget more time for waiting for a cab next time. (b) Oversleeping, because he/she was too tired from working late the previous day. He/she should allocate enough time for rest next time. He/she should also pick up better time management skills, so as to finish work in lesser time.

11. Realize the situation can be a lot worse

No matter how bad the situation is, it can always be much worse. A plus point vs. negative point analysis will help you realize that.

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12. Do your best, but don’t kill yourself over it

No matter how bad your situation may seem, do your best, but don’t kill yourself over it. Life is too beautiful to worry so much over daily issues. Take a step back (#1), give yourself a break if you need to (#6), and do what you can within your means (#9). Everything else will unfold accordingly. Worrying too much about the outcome isn’t going to change things or make your life any better.

13. Pick out the learning points from the encounter

There’s something to learn from every encounter. What have you learned from this situation? What lessons have you taken away?

After you identify your learning points, think about how you’re going to apply them moving forward. With this, you’ve clearly gained something from this encounter. You’ve walked away a stronger, wiser, better person, with more life lessons to draw from in the future.

Get the manifesto version of this article: [Manifesto] What To Do When Things Don’t Go Your Way

Featured photo credit: Alice Donovan Rouse via unsplash.com

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