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3 Cognitive Biases That Affect Our Decisions Every Day

3 Cognitive Biases That Affect Our Decisions Every Day

Many people wonder how their life took a turn for better or worse. A person’s mentality often gets overlooked. There are several concepts including The Law of Attraction that people consider it being nothing more than fluff. As a society, we are faced with challenges that forms our cognitive biases. Those cognitive biases affect our everyday decisions. With those years of decisions, we start to have a better understanding about how our lives have become what they are today.

Here are three cognitive biases that affect our daily decisions:

1.  I Can’t Do That

“I spent the last 30 years of my life doing things that others can’t do or won’t do. [Many of my successes have been based on] people telling me that I couldn’t do something.

I was told that I couldn’t build a website development company. So, I built and designed websites for companies like Microsoft and Sun Microsystems,” says Chuck Blakeman (Serial Entrepreneur & Author of Making Money Is Killing Your Business).

Unfortunately, many people fall victim into believing that they can’t do something. Sadly, people are told such things from people that they admire. Like Chuck Blakeman, there are countless examples of people who have taken ideas and turn them into success stories. despite being in the midst of naysayers.

Your task is not to sulk in those beliefs but instead prove them wrong. Success is a journey that starts by taking one step at a time. In my younger years, I wanted to be an international bestselling author. It took me years to realize that I have to truly believe in something if I wanted to see it come to fruition.

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I had to first believe that it was possible to become an international bestselling author before becoming one. This year marks a significant milestone in my life, which is being a bestselling author in three countries.

2. I Don’t Need Anyone

“A lot of our happiness or unhappiness comes from the quality of our relationships. Human connection fuels happiness”, says Scott Crabtree (Founder & Chief Happiness Officer of Happy Brain Science).

There are a lot of people who carry around an ultra independent attitude. I personally admire someone who is independent. The problem is that independence can sometimes be used as an illusion for a person’s ego. Independence is obviously better than dependence. However, interdependence is better than both of them.

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There is nothing wrong with asking for help. Accepting the help of others will usually shorten the learning curve in anything you want to pursue in life. It does not make you any less independent. Stephen Covey (Author of the NY Times Bestseller, 7 Habits of Highly Effective People) agrees that we function best when we recognize and works towards the role of interdependence.

None of us is perfect. We all have weaknesses. So, why not let someone who is strong in your weak areas to help you?

3. I Have No Purpose

“You have to decide your mission in your life. That’s your guide. What kind of impact do you want to have on the planet? Be very clear about it [because if your mission] is hazy, it will be very difficult”, says Aubrey Marcus (Founder & CEO of Onnit).

Many people can make different arguments about the origin of our nature. However, I think the overwhelming majority of us share the same theme on life: You only live once. So, make the most of it. I hope you are moving with the time because it will continue to move with or without you.

Wayne Dyer and Stephen Covey are two examples of inspirational role models who left a legacy for us. My goal is to leave a legacy too. Since the Great Recession, I have helped over 2,000 people reach the finish line and you can too. My message is still the same.

Success is unavailable to the majority because the majority are unavailable.

Featured photo credit: Olichel via pixabay.com

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Kallen Diggs

Bestselling Author / Magazine Editor / Syndicated Radio Show Host

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Last Updated on October 16, 2019

Invaluable Lessons You Can Learn From Your Mistakes

Invaluable Lessons You Can Learn From Your Mistakes

Do you like making mistakes?

I certainly don’t.

Making mistakes is inevitable. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could be at ease with them?

Perhaps there is a way to think of them differently and see their benefits.

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Why Mistakes Feel Dangerous

Mistakes often feel dangerous. Throughout human history, our errors have often been treated as dangerous for a variety of reasons:

  • Our vulnerability. We have limited and fragile support systems. When those systems fail, people often lose their lives.
  • Real dangers. Nature can be dangerous, and making mistakes can put us at the mercy of nature and its animal residents seeking a meal.
  • Ignorance. Many cultures scapegoats someone whenever there is a failure of some kind. Scapegoating can be serious and deadly.
  • Order. Many societies punish those who do not conform to the prevailing orthodoxy and treat difference and non-conformity as a mistake. Even our brains flash an error message whenever we go against prevailing social norms.

We have a history of handling mistakes and failure in an unpleasant way. Since each of us carries our human history with us, it can be a challenge to overcome the fear of making mistakes.

If we can embrace the reality of mistakes, we can free ourselves to be more creative in our lives and dig up some interesting insights.

Why We Can’t Avoid Making Mistakes

Many people operate under the notion that making mistakes is an aberration, a mistake if you will. You can call it perfectionism but it is a more substantial problem. It is really a demand for order and continuity.

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When we think we can eliminate mistakes, we are often working from a perspective that sees the world as a fixed place. The world, however, is not so obliging. Like it or not, the world, and everything in it, is constantly changing.

Change is more constant and pervasive than we can see with our own eyes which is why we often miss it. Our bodies are constantly changing. The natural conditions of the earth change constantly as well. Everything, including economic and cultural systems have life cycles. Everything is in a constant state of flux.

We cannot see all of the changes going on around us since rates of change vary. Unfortunately, when we try to create a feeling of certainty and solidity in our lives or operate from the illusion of stability and order, we are fighting reality and our natural evolution which is built on adapting to change.

It is better to continually bend into this reality rather than fight every change we experience. Fighting it can cause us to make more mistakes. Finding the benefits in change can be useful and help us minimize unnecessary mistakes.

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Lessons Learned from Making Mistakes

Life has so many uncertainties and variables that mistakes are inevitable. Fortunately, there are many things you can learn from making mistakes.

Here is a list of ways to harness the mistakes you make for your benefit.

  1. Point us to something we did not know.
  2. Reveal a nuance we missed.
  3. Deepen our knowledge.
  4. Tell us something about our skill levels.
  5. Help us see what matters and what does not.
  6. Inform us more about our values.
  7. Teach us more about others.
  8. Let us recognize changing circumstances.
  9. Show us when someone else has changed.
  10. Keep us connected to what works and what doesn’t work.
  11. Remind us of our humanity.
  12. Spur us to want to better work which helps us all.
  13. Promote compassion for ourselves and others.
  14. Teach us to value forgiveness.
  15. Help us to pace ourselves better.
  16. Invite us to better choices.
  17. Can teach us how to experiment.
  18. Can reveal a new insight.
  19. Can suggest new options we had not considered.
  20. Can serve as a warning.
  21. Show us hidden fault lines in our lives which can lead us to more productive arrangements.
  22. Point out structural problems in our lives.
  23. Prompt us to learn more about ourselves.
  24. Remind us how we are like others.
  25. Make us more humble.
  26. Help us rectify injustices in our lives.
  27. Show us where to create more balance in our lives.
  28. Tell us when the time to move on has occurred.
  29. Reveal where our passion is and where it is not.
  30. Expose our true feelings.
  31. Bring out problems in a relationship.
  32. Can be a red flag for our misjudgments.
  33. Point us in a more creative direction.
  34. Show us when we are not listening.
  35. Wake us up to our authentic selves.
  36. Can create distance with someone else.
  37. Slow us down when we need to.
  38. Can hasten change.
  39. Reveal our blind spots.
  40. Are the invisible made visible.

Reframe Reality to Handle Mistakes More Easily

The secret to handling mistakes is to:

  • Expect them as part of the process of growth and development.
  • Have an experimental mindset.
  • Think in evolutional rather than fixed terms.

When we accept change as the natural structure of the world, our vulnerability and humanness lets us work with the ebb and flow of life.

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When we recognize the inevitability of mistakes as part of the ongoing experiment which life is, then we can relax more. In doing so we may make fewer of them.

It also helps to keep in mind that trial and error is an organic natural way of living. It is how we have evolved over time. It is better to be with our natural evolution than to fight it and make life harder.

When we adopt an evolutional mindset and see ourselves as part of the ongoing human experiment, we can appreciate that all that has been built up over time which includes the many mistakes our ancestors have made over thousands of years. Each one of us today is a part of that human tradition of learning and experimenting,

Mistakes are part of the trial and error, experimental nature of life. The more you adopt the experimental, evolutional frame, the easier it becomes to handle mistakes.

Handling mistakes well can help you relax and enjoy all aspects of life more.

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Featured photo credit: Sarah Kilian via unsplash.com

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