Why are parties considered almost an obligatory activity for you to have a good time? If this question bothers you, then you will understand what truly makes a good night out — parties not included. There are loads of things you can do to enjoy yourself. Standing around trying to talk and socialize with the inevitable drink in one hand does not have to be one of them.
People look at you strangely when you try to tell them that you don’t like parties, that they can be exhausting and even stressful. In their minds, they only visualize glinting lights on glasses, people laughing, music, dancing, making new friends, staying up till the small hours of the morning and generally having a fantastic time. If they only knew what you have to go through to make sure that you avoid them at all costs.
If you don’t like partying, here are 10 things you can understand and relate to.
1. You are not a hermit or recluse
You have your own circles of friends and you are not particularly keen on getting to know loads of new ones. You also enjoy being with your friends for a night at the cinema or dining out in the latest ethnic restaurant. You are not a loner because you know the value of being in the company of close friends.
2. You have other ideas about having a good time
You don’t want to explain to anyone (and why should you?) that there are other ways of having a good time. Have they not heard about books, films, gardening, yoga, or swimming? Which commandment says “Thou shalt have a good time only at parties,” you wonder.
3. You want to relax
Parties are hard work, so forget about relaxation. When you are dragged kicking and screaming to a party, this is usually what happens: you see your friends and maybe chat with them. Nothing new there. Then, maybe you want to be a little bit more adventurous and socialize more broadly. So, you have to work out opening lines, think up interesting topics, and areas of common interest. Then there is the music, chaos, standing up for long periods, trying to get another drink, and finding a chair to sit on. This is exhausting and you wish you had never accepted the invitation.
4. You like your beauty sleep
It is wonderful to go to bed and sleep soundly. No getting home late, no mad searching for taxis, which by this point are as scarce as hen’s teeth. Nothing like your own nightcap, a warm bed, and zero worries about how many hours of sleep you’ll get. Sheer bliss!
5. You don’t like drinking
Why does everyone sort of frown when you say that you don’t drink? Is there some magical ingredient in alcohol which makes you a social and fun-loving animal? The joy of never having a hangover the next day is indescribable. Once was more than enough!
6. You feel like you’re taking an exam
Parties are like an examination in social skills. But this is supposed to be about having a great time, isn’t it? No way. Now you have to keep the conversation going and then you have to think of an exit strategy. You ask yourself why it feels as if your social skills are being assessed. You begin to feel like an alien because you have only clicked with one person in the last ten you have met.
7. You hate having to circulate
You think nostalgically about sitting round the dinner table with some close friends and having a relaxed chat. At parties, there is no such thing because you have to circulate. The problem here is that it is a hell of a job to find one interesting person to talk to. It seems that you have to keep mixing and circulating and sometimes you never find that person. You would have a better chance of winning the lottery.
8. You find parties rowdy and noisy
The noise level is usually unbearable as the lives and souls of the party get going. Miley Cyrus gets louder and people get drunker, rowdier, and noisier. This is another reason why you hate parties. You must have been crazy to accept this time. The next time, you will be at home watching the end of a really good film and maybe chatting about it with some friends.
9. You find quieter parties too intense
You know the ones, those smaller parties where people are intent on talking about politics, philosophy, and the greater questions of life. They break up into small groups and it is impossible to escape. But you already have your own ideas on these topics and are not prepared to give a TED talk late at night. These parties can get very intense and sometimes end with argumentative people getting heated. You want to curl up in bed, but you’ve already been trapped.
10. You are tired of the introvert and extrovert labels
You’re tired of having to explain that most people are neither totally introverted or extroverted. It is rather like a spectrum and you just happen to be nearer the quieter end of the scale. People are wired differently, so you wonder what the fuss is all about. In addition, you are not prepared to go to parties because you feel you should do so or because there is too much peer pressure.
Let us know in the comments how you escape parties and how you still manage to enjoy yourself!
Featured photo credit: Newbury Birthday Party /Gareth Williams via flickr.com