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8 Uncomfortable Actions That Result in Self-Improvement

8 Uncomfortable Actions That Result in Self-Improvement

Stepping out of your comfort zone is the toughest action you can take. It’s right there in the name: comfort zone. Obviously, stepping outside of it would make you uncomfortable. And who wants to be uncomfortable?

However, doing so is the only way you’ll ever grow as a person. In today’s fast-moving world, self-improvement is the key to getting ahead. It’s no longer acceptable to be just average; in order to succeed in life you need to excel in everything you set out to do. Making these changes might scare you, but the success you’ll experience after doing so will make all the discomfort worth it.

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1. Being skeptical

There’s a terrible saying that complacent people use when they don’t feel like standing up for what they believe in: “It is what it is.” It’s a resignation that, even though they know something is wrong in the world, there’s nothing they can do to change it. The greatest minds of our time never used this phrase; they questioned why “it is what it is,” and put their all into changing, and bettering, the world around them. Be the person that acknowledges that things don’t have to be the way they are, and that we all can change for the better.

2. Being honest

Being honest is not always the easiest thing to do. But it’s always the right thing to do. And this doesn’t just mean you should be honest when you know there’s a chance of getting caught. Hold yourself to the highest level of integrity. Live in private the way you live in public. Keep your promises. Even if everyone else around you is a back-stabbing weasel, take solace in the fact that you continue to maintain a high standard for yourself.

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3. Waking up early

The most successful people in the world wake up hours before they actually start working. They use this time to exercise, eat a healthy breakfast, and prepare themselves for the busy day ahead of them. Your time on Earth is your most valuable commodity. Once it’s gone, you can’t ever get it back. While it’s definitely easier to stay in bed as long as you can before you have to get to work, you’re really just wasting the most important gift you’ve been given.

4. Tracking your spending

So many of us can’t start our day without Starbucks or some other pick-me-up that costs $2-3 per day. While that doesn’t seem like much, it ends up costing you anywhere from $300 to $500 over the course of a year ($15,000 over the course of a career!). I’m not saying you should never indulge yourself, but you also should never get in the habit of spending money just because you feel like you need to. Keep track of every penny you spend, and you’ll almost immediately realize there are things you’re spending too much on that you can cut out right away.

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5. Tracking what you eat

One of the keys to self-improvement is watching what you eat. This goes along with the last point about spending money: if you eat a donut every day just because “you always do,” you might want to think about cutting down. Again, I’m not saying you should completely give up the sweets, but you should definitely acknowledge that not everything you put into your body is healthy. Making healthy changes to your diet will not only leave you feeling better physically, but you’ll also end up with a healthier mental attitude as well.

6. Speaking in public

There’s an old Seinfeld joke about people’s number one fear being public speaking, while number two is death: People would rather be in the coffin than giving the eulogy. If you think about it, having a fear of public speaking makes no sense. Since almost everyone is terrified of it, there’s no reason for you to be afraid of it. Remember in college when everyone had to give a speech? Did you actually care if the person up front made a mistake or didn’t perform well? No! The only time people care enough to remember a speech is if it’s incredibly good. Think about that the next time you have to give a presentation: You’ll only be remembered if what you said was worth remembering.

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7. Focusing on one improvement at a time

It’s easy to become overwhelmed by all the areas of self-improvement you should be focusing on. But it’s impossible to attack them all at once. If you’re trying to quit smoking, you probably shouldn’t also try to give up your daily donut at the same time; you’ll drive yourself (and others around you) absolutely crazy. Take the time to make a plan of attack, so you’re able to focus on one area of improvement at a time. After a year of self-improvement, you’ll feel like a completely new person.

8. Setting and achieving improbable goals

When setting goals for self-improvement, you don’t want to make them so easy that you reach them with minimal effort, or so hard that you become completely overwhelmed. Set goals that are just out of reach, so that every time you hit one you feel a sense of accomplishment. For example, if you want to start working out, it’s a terrible idea to plan to go to the gym seven days a week; it just won’t happen. But it’s also too easy to just go once a week. Make a plan to go at least three times, and, if you feel up to it, four or five. No matter what you’re trying to accomplish, plan so that you have to strive to reach the minimum goal you’ve set, but you also have room to improve.

Featured photo credit: 04222014 – Success Boot Camp Graduation at PCP – US Department of Education via farm8.staticflickr.com

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Matt Duczeminski

A passionate writer who shares lifestlye tips on Lifehack

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Last Updated on April 14, 2021

How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

We all lose our temper from time to time, and expressing anger is actually a healthy thing to do in our relationships with others. Expressing our differences in opinion allows us to have healthy conflict and many times come to an agreement or understanding that works for everyone. However, there are times when anger can become overwhelming or damaging, and during these times, it’s important to learn how to deal with anger.

Expressing anger inappropriately can be harmful to relationships, both personal and professional. You may express too much anger, too often, or at times that are only going to make things worse, not better. In this article we will look at anger management techniques that will help you better control your emotions.

Let’s take a deeper look at how to deal with anger.

Expressing Anger

Anger is a natural and normal part of almost any relationship. This includes relationships with your significant other, kids, boss, friends, family, etc. Anger provides us with valuable information if we are willing to listen to it. It clues us in to areas where we disagree with others and things that need to be changed or altered.

Unhealthy Ways to Express Anger

Here are some common yet unhealthy ways to express anger that you should avoid:

Being Passive-Aggressive

This is a term many of us are familiar with. Passive-aggressive behavior happens when someone is angry but uses indirect communication to express their anger.

Some of the more common passive-aggressive behaviors include the silent treatment, making comments about someone behind their back, being grumpy, moody, or pouting, or simply not doing tasks or assignments that they should.

This is a passive-aggressive person’s way of showing their anger. It’s not very productive but extremely common.

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Poorly-Timed

Some people get overwhelmed and express anger in a situation where it can’t really do any good.

An example would be getting angry at one person in front of a crowd of people. All that does is make people uncomfortable and shuts them down. It’s not a healthy way to express anger or disagreement with someone.

Ongoing Anger

Being angry all the time is most often a symptom of something else. It’s healthy and normal to express anger when you disagree with someone. However, if someone is angry most of the time and always seems to be expressing their anger to everyone around them, this won’t serve them well.

Over time, people will start to avoid this person and have as little contact as possible. The reason being is no one likes being around someone who is angry all the time; it’s a no-win situation.

Healthy Ways to Express Anger

What about the healthy ways[1] to adapt? When learning how to deal with anger, here are some healthy ways to get you started.

Being Honest

Express your anger or disagreement honestly. Be truthful about what it is that is making you angry. Sometimes this will entail walking away and thinking about it for a bit before you respond.

Don’t say you’re mad at something someone did or said when it’s really something else that upset you.

Being Direct

Similar to being honest, being direct is a healthy way to express anger.

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Don’t talk around something that is making you angry. Don’t say that one thing is making you angry when it’s really something else, and don’t stack items on top of each other so you can unload on someone about 10 different things 6 months from now.

Be direct and upfront about what is making you angry. Ensure you are expressing your anger to the person who upset you or you are angry at, not to someone else. This is very counterproductive.

Being Timely

When something makes you angry, it’s much better to express it in a timely manner. Don’t keep it bottled up inside of you, as that’s only going to do more harm than good.

Think of the marriages that seem to go up in flames out of nowhere when the reality is someone kept quiet for years until they hit their breaking point.

Expressing anger as it occurs is a much healthier way of using anger to help us guide our relationships in the moment.

How to Deal With Anger

If you feel angry, how should you deal with it right at that moment?

1. Slow Down

From time to time, I receive an email at work that makes me so angry that steam is probably pouring out of my ears.

In my less restrained moments, I have been known to fire off a quick response, and that typically has ended about as well as you might imagine.

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When I actually walk away from my computer and go do something else for a while, I am able to calm down and think more rationally. After that happens, I am able to respond in a more appropriate and productive manner. Doing things that helps you learn how to release anger can make an uncomfortable situation more manageable before it gets out of hand.

2. Focus on the “I”

Remember that you are the one that’s upset. Don’t accuse people of making you upset because, in the end, it’s your response to what someone did that really triggered your anger. You don’t want to place blame by saying something like “Why don’t you ever put away your dishes?” Say something more like “Having dirty dishes laying on the counter upsets me—can you work with me to come to a solution?”

When you are accusatory towards someone, all that does is increase the tension. This doesn’t usually do anything except make your anger rise higher.

3. Work out

When learning how to deal with anger, exercise is a great outlet. If something happens that angers you, see if you have the opportunity to burn off some of the anger.

Being able to hit the gym to get a hard workout in is great. If this isn’t an option, see if you can go for a run or a bike ride. If you are at work when you become angry and the weather permits, at least go outside for a brisk walk.

Besides working some of your anger out through exercise, this also helps to give your mind a chance to work through some ways to address what it is that upset you.

If you’re not sure where to start with an exercise routine, check out Lifehack’s free Simple Cardio Home Workout Plan.

4. Seek Help When Needed

There are times when we could all use some help. Life can be stressful and overwhelming. It’s perfectly fine to seek some help from a mental health professional if it will help you get back to a healthy balance.If you find that you are angry all the time, it might be a good idea to go talk to an expert about learning to control intense emotions. They can give you some sound advice and ideas on how to get your anger to a more manageable and healthy level.

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5. Practice Relaxation

We all seem to lead incredibly busy lives, and that’s a good thing if we are loving the life we are living. That being said, it is very beneficial to our physical and mental well-being to take time out for relaxation.

That can mean spending time doing things that help us calm down and relax, like being around people we enjoy, practicing deep breathing or listening to music. It could be making time for things that help bring us balance like a healthy diet and physical activity.

Many people incorporate techniques such as yoga and meditation to calm their minds and release tension when learning how to deal with anger. Whatever your choice is, ensure you take time out to relax when warning signs of anger start to bubble up.

6. Laugh

Incorporating humor and laughter on a regular basis will help keep anger in check and help you get over a bad mood and feelings of anger more quickly. This isn’t part of formal anger management techniques, but you’ll be surprised by how well it works. Remember, life is a journey that’s meant to be enjoyed fully along the way through healthy emotion. Make sure you take time to laugh and have fun.Surround yourself with people that like to laugh and enjoy life. Don’t work at a job that just causes you stress, which can lead to anger. Work at something you enjoy doing.

7. Be Grateful

It’s easy to focus on the bad in life and the things that cause us negative emotions. It’s vitally important to remind ourselves of all the wonderful things in life that bring us positive emotions, things that we easily forget because we get caught up in the whirlwind of day to day life.

Take time out each day to remind yourself of a few things you are grateful for in order to help you learn how to release anger and invite in more positive feelings.

Final Thoughts

Life can be overwhelming at times. We seem to have constant pressure to achieve more and to always be on the go. People we are around and situations we are in can cause stress, anger, and negative emotions. At times, it can seem to be too much, and we get angry and our emotions start to get out of control.

During these times, keep in mind that life is an incredible journey, full of wonder and things that bring you joy. When you find yourself angry more often than is healthy, take time out to remember the good things in life—the things that we seem to forget yet bring us so much positive energy and emotions.

Use some of the tips included here to help with how to deal with anger and better control your emotions.

More Resources on Anger Management

Featured photo credit: Andre Hunter via unsplash.com

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