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Small Things Wonderful People Do That Build Deep Relationships

Small Things Wonderful People Do That Build Deep Relationships

There are only two kinds of relationships – those that are long-term and those that are very long-term. The rest are acquaintances. Long-term relationships are deep and are built to weather the storms along the way.

Here are ten small things wonderful people do to build deeper relationships:

1. They (Genuinely) Care

They care for what you care about as if it’s their own. There is a difference between genuinely caring and “pretending to care” and they clearly are in the former camp. When they converse with you, they tend to drop their agenda and focus on yours.

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2. They Remember

I am not talking about birthdays and anniversaries. They care about things that matter most to you. In other words, they act as your self-appointed accountability partners. They catch things that you might have dropped owing to your busy schedule.

3. They (Thoughtfully) Connect

They thoughtfully connect you to people from their network to expand the space of your own possibilities in your personal and professional life. They are keenly aware that your capacity expands significantly when you are connected to the right people.

4. They Follow-up

They are relentless in their followup – not on what they need from you, but on things that move the needle of your personal and professional lives. They are aware that you start your projects with great intentions, but like everyone else you need a helping hand in following them through to completion.

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5. They Make You Think

They don’t simply accept what you say when it comes to you taking important (game-changing) decisions in your work and life. They ask thoughtful questions that will make you think and re-think. In the process, you end up making better decisions.

6.  They Celebrate Your Wins

They are not “passively jealous” of your wins. They celebrate your wins with all their heart. In addition, they ensure that you don’t rest on your laurels by helping you set your sights on the next big thing for you.

7. They (Really) Listen

They listen to what you say AND they also listen to what you don’t say. They read between the lines to get to the bottom of what’s the real underlying issue that is bothering you. They also create a level of comfort for you to openly share your hopes, dreams, desires, fears, challenges, concerns, wishes and your wants.

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8. They Smile

They are like a fresh breeze. They walk in with a smile all the time. It’s a joy to be spending time with them. You are in a flow when they are around.

9. They Make YOU Smile

They touch your life in such a powerful way that you start feeling good about yourself. They accentuate your positives and help you cover your negatives. In short, they make you smile and feel blessed. In their presence. you feel relaxed and at ease about life.

10. They Are Just a Phone Call Away

They make it clear and mean it when they say they are just a phone call away. They are there for you in good times and bad times. Just the fact that they are available in case you need them gives you a boost in your confidence to take on the challenges ahead.

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11. They Demonstrate a High PGQ

Practical Generosity Quotient (PGQ) is the capacity one adds in relation to the capacity the other person needs to move the needle in a significant way. They bring with them a PGQ so high that you don’t have a choice but to feel blessed to be their friend.

In summary, your life is wonderful because you are surrounded by these wonderful people. Build deep relationships with these people and make your life magical.

Featured photo credit: Black Chaos via flickr.com

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Last Updated on September 17, 2018

7 Signs of an Unhappy Relationship That Makes You Feel Stuck

7 Signs of an Unhappy Relationship That Makes You Feel Stuck

Relationships are complicated and when you’re unhappy, it can be difficult to tell what’s causing it and what needs to change.

Sometimes it’s as easy as opening up to your partner about your problems, while other times it may be necessary to switch partners or roll solo to get your mind straight.

When you’re in the thick of things, it can be difficult to tell if you’re unhappy in your relationship or just unhappy in general (in which case, a relationship may be just the cure you need).

Here’re signs of an unhappy relationship that is possibly making you feel stuck:

1. You’re depressed about your home life.

No matter what you do in life, you’re going to have good and bad days. Your relationship is no different.

However, no matter what you’re going through at home, you have to feel comfortable in your own home.

If you constantly dread going home because your significant other is there, there’s a problem. Maybe it’s something you already know about, everyone has an argument or just needs some alone time.

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When that yearning to be alone becomes an insatiable obsession over the course of months and years, it’s time to realize you’re not the exception to the rule.

You’re unhappy in your relationship, and you need to take a look in the mirror and do whatever it takes to make yourself smile.

2. You aren’t comfortable being yourself.

Remember all those things you discovered about yourself when you first got together? The way your partner made you feel when you met that made you fall in love with him or her in the first place.

If they don’t make you feel that way anymore, it’s not the end of the world. If your partner makes you uncomfortable about being you, then her or she is only dragging you down. It’s up to you to decide how to handle that.

You need to be comfortable with who you are. This means being comfortable in your skin and with the way you walk, talk, look, breath, move, and all the other things that make you uniquely you.

If the person who supposedly loves you doesn’t make you feel good about yourself, know that you can do better. They’re not even one in a billion.

3. You can’t stop snooping.

Mutual trust is necessary in any relationship. The only way to get that trust is with respect.

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I can find you anywhere online, no matter how private and secure you think you are. The odds of you having a password I can’t crack are slim. If we’ve met in person, I could install a remote key logger on your device without even touching it.

Finding your information online hardly takes a clandestine organization. Any idiot with a Wi-Fi-enabled device can cyberstalk you. I’m just the only idiot in the village admitting it.

So now that we know everyone snoops, it’s time to address your personal habits. Governments snoop because they don’t trust us. If you’re snooping on your partner, it’s because you don’t trust them.

It’s ok to have doubts, and it’s perfectly normal to look into anything that looks weird, but keep in mind that data collection is only half of an investigation.

If you find yourself constantly snooping and questioning everything, clearly there’s a trust issue and the relationship likely needs to end.

4. You’re afraid of commitment.

If you’ve been dating longer than a year and you aren’t engaged, it’s never going to happen.

Commitment is important. People will come up with a million ways to describe why they can’t be committed.

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No matter who you are if you like it, you need to put a ring on it. Find an engagement ring, stick a gemstone in it and marry the person. If you’re not legally able to get married or you don’t believe in it for one reason or another, have a child (or adopt one, however you’re able to) or treat your partner’s family like your own. It’s a huge financial and mental commitment.

If you’re not ready for one or the other after some time, don’t waste anymore of your precious life on the relationship.

Your relationship should be something that propels you forward. If it’s not going anywhere, make it an open relationship and call it what it is—dating multiple people.

5. You imagine a happier life without your partner.

If all you’re doing is imagining a happier life without your partner, it’s a sign that you’re in the wrong relationship. You’re unhappy and you need to get out.

Your partner should be included in your dreams. There’s nothing wrong with wanting a future with someone.

Try to remember what you dreamed of before you got your heart broken by the realities of life, love and the pursuit of human success.

Remember when you would crush on that cute kid in class? You would secretly imagine marrying him or her and going on an adventure—that’s the way life should be.

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If you’re not at least imagining adventures together, then why are you in that relationship?

6. You resent, rather than love your partner.

When a relationship starts to crumble, you begin to resent your partner for all the things you once loved about him or her.

When you’ve reached this point, your partner has reached at least No. 2 on this list. From your partner’s perspective, your unhappiness with them is picked up as bashing them for being who they are.

If you’re both unhappy in the relationship, it’s better if it ends as quickly and painlessly as possible.

7. You chase past feelings.

It’s okay to reminisce about the past, but if all you do is wish things were like they used to be, it’s a sign you’re not on the right path.

You’re unhappy and, at the very least, you need to have an open dialogue about it. This isn’t necessarily a sign that the relationship should end, but it definitely needs a spark.

When you talk to your partner candidly about what it is you’re looking for, you never know how they’ll react. The risk alone is worth it, good or bad.

Final thoughts

If you’re feeling stuck in your current relationship, it’s time to reflect about it with your partner. Don’t ignore these signs of an unhappy relationship as they will slowly go worse and harm both you and your partner in long-term.

Featured photo credit: josh peterson via unsplash.com

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