Many of us live in denial.
We try to listen to the opinions of other people and concern ourselves with what they think about us. We revel in trying to tailor our lives to the expectations of others. But how far can this get you, and will the end result be fulfilling? It’s possible you need to start facing the hard truths of what makes you a unique and interesting being, rather than letting the thoughts and opinions of others shape your views.
It is time to live the life you were meant to live: an awesome life. To do this you need to start ignoring these lies:
Success is the opposite of failure
People often feel that if you have failed at a venture or a project, you can’t really be considered successful. They want you to try to focus your energies on not being a failure, convincing you that playing it safe in life is what brings success.
Real talk: failure isn’t the opposite of success but actually an integral part of becoming successful. People who have succeeded have failed a number of times before they became the success that they are today. You either you learn from failure and keep moving- or you allow it to consume you in a destructive manner.
“I am too old for that”
People tend to associate accomplishments with a certain age. It’s true that you need to be a certain age to get a degree, get married, or pursue some very specific ventures. This, combined with to age-related stereotypes, makes it easy to feel that you are simply the wrong person for the job you want- or that taking risks would make you look foolish.
Real talk: you shouldn’t be consumed with the fear that you have to be a certain age to gain success in life. Everyone has their own timeline, and you are never too old or too young to accomplish what you really want to do in life. For example, Nelson Mandela became president of South Africa when he was 76. Colonel Sanders started KFC when he was 61. Age doesn’t have to be a barrier.
“If only I had [….] I would be happy”
It seems for many people, being happy is always tied to acquiring certain possessions and items. Yet no matter how many things you attain, having something will always push you to want something else.
Real talk: appreciating things the way they are will lead you to contentment and happiness. Rather than complain or whine about the troubles in your life, why don’t you start offering thanks for all the troubles that you don’t have? Being consumed with wanting to have this or that could blind you to appreciating the things that are of value that you already have. Learn to be grateful and you will find happiness.
“Other people are better off than me”
You think that your friends who you went to school with, and the people you grew up with, are already leading fulfilled and exciting lives- and you’re not. There must be something wrong with you for not becoming like them, right?
Real talk: truthfully, no one has it better than you. If you are not as successful as others in terms of wealth or financial status, it doesn’t mean you haven’t excelled in your own unique way in life. Everyone has a different identity and accepting who you are will show you that you don’t have to perceive others as being better than you.
You have to be like every other person to be happy
You have to follow the same course every other person is taking to be happy. You have to go to school, get a degree, get a job, get married and have kids to be the person society expects you to be. This is conventional thinking, but what about your own inner validation?
Real talk: your happiness doesn’t depend on fitting whatever happens to be considered ‘normal’ today. You don’t have to be like every other person, do what they do, or take the same route to a destination. Rather you have to be you. You have to identify your own uniqueness.
Besides, not everything is always as it seems- life could have a way of tutoring you through providing unexpected paths for you to walk.
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