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7 Signs Your Ego Is Limiting Your Success (And How To Tame It)

7 Signs Your Ego Is Limiting Your Success (And How To Tame It)

There’s a fine line between confident and egotistical. It’s definitely okay to take pride in your work and have the self-esteem to know that you’re good at what you do, but it’s another to think you’re better than everyone else and act superior to them. Your ego can really get in the way. If you truly are better at performing your job than other people are, gloating about it only wastes time and energy. Instead, you should work on building others up in order for the entire team to succeed.

Signs of egotism:

  • Frequent complaining

Egotists find any and everything to complain about when things start to go wrong, when they should really be using that energy to right the ship. These people tend to blame others for a team’s shortcomings, rather than look at what they can do better, or what they can do to help others grow.

  • Frequent arguing

Since they tend to place blame on others, egotists are often very confrontational. This leads to rifts between colleagues and coworkers, ultimately impeding any progress for all parties involved.

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  • Defensive behavior

Egotists are quick to blame everyone else, but somehow always have a reason for why they didn’t perform well on a task. When others mess up, they’re incompetent; when they mess up, it’s because they didn’t sleep well, or have a lot on their plate. They often don’t listen to constructive criticism, believing their supervisor is simply out to get them. Obviously, this attitude completely impedes their ability to improve.

  • Self-criticism

Behind closed doors, egotists are incredibly critical of themselves. They are afraid of taking risks or stepping out of their comfort zones because they fear being laughed at. This stems from the notion that they actually think anyone else truly cares enough to judge them. Egotists also believe that others think this way simply because that’s how they operate themselves.

  • No apologies

Why would an egotist apologize? In their eyes, they never do any wrong. This goes back to how they often blame others for their own mistakes or shortcomings, and how they rationalize their own behavior. When someone wrongs them, they’ll hold a grudge until the other party apologizes. When they wrong others, they believe the other party should just let it go.

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  • Impatience

Egotists are rather impatient when it takes others a little longer to learn something or complete a task. They think they’re more intelligent and efficient than everyone else in the room, so they get frustrated when someone else takes their time doing something. They don’t take the time to consider other people’s thought processes or abilities. Rather than help others, they simply complain about how long it’s taking them to get a job done.

  • Passing judgment

Obviously, egotists are incredibly judgmental. They don’t consider other people’s background, personal life, or any other factor when analyzing their ability to perform a specific task. When others fail, egotists don’t see them as a work in progress; they simply see them as a failure.

Ways to overcome egotism

You might not even realize you’re acting in a way that comes of as egotistical. If any of the preceding characteristics apply to you, you should take action in order to become a more compassionate, team-driven individual.

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  • Help others instead of putting them down

Don’t waste time and energy complaining about how terrible others are at their jobs. If you’re so much better than them, it should be easy to help them improve. Share the strategies you’ve used to move forward in life. Your colleagues will most likely appreciate your efforts, and your team will move toward success.

  • Use criticism wisely

When helping others, point out the things they do well. Although they probably have areas in need of improvement pertaining to their performance, don’t harp on them. Instead, guide them toward growth. Nobody likes a critic, so if you’re going to criticize others, make sure it’s for a positive reason.

  • Only judge yourself

You should never, ever judge anyone other than yourself. Don’t compare other people’s performance to your own because you have no idea about any other aspect of their life, and have never walked in their shoes. Compare yourself only to the person you were yesterday. If you haven’t made improvements yourself, you have no right to judge anyone else.

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Featured photo credit: Flickrr via farm8.staticflickr.com

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Matt Duczeminski

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Last Updated on July 3, 2020

30 Small Habits To Lead A More Peaceful Life

30 Small Habits To Lead A More Peaceful Life

In today’s world, true peace must come from within us and our own actions. Here are 30 small things you can do on a regular basis to increase your overall sense of harmony, peace, and well-being:

1. Don’t go to every fight you’re invited to

Particularly when you’re around those who thrive on chaos, be willing to decline the invitation to join in on the drama.

2. Focus on your breath

Throughout the day, stop to take a few deep breaths. Keep stress at bay with techniques such as “square breathing.” Breathe in for four counts, hold for four counts, then out for four counts, and hold again for four counts. Repeat this cycle four times.

3. Get organized and purge old items

A cluttered space often creates a cluttered spirit. Take the time to get rid of anything you haven’t used in a year and invest in organizational systems that help you sustain a level of neatness.

4. Stop yourself from being judgmental

Whenever you are tempted to have an opinion about someone else’s life, check your intentions. Judging others creates and promotes negative energy.

5. Say ‘thank you’ early and often

Start and end each day with an attitude of gratitude. Look for opportunities in your daily routine and interactions to express appreciation.

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6. Smile more

Even if you have to “fake it until you make it,” there are many scientific benefits of smiling and laughing. Also, pay attention to your facial expression when you are doing neutral activities such as driving and walking. Turn that frown upside down!

7. Don’t worry about the future

As difficult as this sounds, there is a direct connection between staying in the present and living a more peaceful life. You cannot control the future. As the old proverb goes, “Worry is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but it won’t get you anywhere.” Practice gently bringing your thoughts back to the present.

8. Eat real food

The closer the food is to the state from which it came from the earth, the better you will feel in eating it. Choose foods that grew from a plant over food that was made in a plant.

9. Choose being happy over being right

Too often, we sacrifice inner peace in order to make a point. It’s rarely worth it.

10. Keep technology out of the bedroom

Many studies, such as one conducted by Brigham and Women’s Hospital, have connected blue light of electronic devices before bed to adverse sleep and overall health. To make matters worse, many people report that they cannot resist checking email and social media when their cell phone is in reach of their bed, regardless of the time.

11. Make use of filtering features on social media

You may not want to “unfriend” someone completely, however you can choose whether you want to follow their posts and/or the sources of information that they share.

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12. Get comfortable with silence

When you picture someone who is the ultimate state of peace, typically they aren’t talking.

13. Listen to understand, not to respond

So often in conversations, we use our ears to give us cues about when it is our turn to say what we want to say. Practice active listening, ask questions, process, then speak.

14. Put your troubles in a bubble

Whenever you start to feel anxious, visualize the situation being wrapped in a bubble and then picture that sphere floating away.

15. Speak more slowly

Often a lack of peace manifests itself in fast or clipped speech. Take a breath, slow down, and let your thoughtful consideration drive your words.

16. Don’t procrastinate

Nothing adds stress to our lives like waiting until the last minute.

17. Buy a coloring book

Mandala coloring books for adults are becoming more popular because of their connection to creating inner peace.

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18. Prioritize yourself

You are the only person who you are guaranteed to live with 24 hours a day for the rest of your life.

19. Forgive others

Holding a grudge is hurting you exponentially more than anyone else. Let it go.

20. Check your expectations

Presumption often leads to drama. Remember the old saying, “Expectations are premeditated resentments.”

21. Engage in active play

Let your inner child come out and have some fun. Jump, dance, play, and pretend!

22. Stop criticizing yourself

The world is a hard enough place with more than enough critics. Your life is not served well by being one of them.

23. Focus your energy and attention on what you want

Thoughts, words, and actions all create energy. Energy attracts like energy. Put out what you want to get back.

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24. Assign yourself “complaint free” days.

Make a conscious decision not to complain about anything for a whole day. It might be harder than you think and the awareness will stick with you.

25. Surround yourself with people you truly enjoy being in the company of

Personalities tend to be contagious, and not everyone’s is worth catching. Be judicious in your choices.

26. Manage your money

Financial concerns rank top on the list of what causes people stress. Take the time each month to do a budget, calculate what you actually spend and sanity check that against the money you have coming in.

27. Stop trying to control everything

Not only is your inner control freak sabotaging your sense of peace, it is also likely getting in the way of external relationships as well.

28. Practice affirmations

Repeat positive phrases that depict the life and qualities you want to attract. It may not come naturally to you, but it works.

29. Get up before sunrise

Personally witnessing the dawn brings a unique sense of awe and appreciation for life.

30. Be yourself

Nothing creates more inner discord than trying to be something other than who we really are. Authenticity breeds happiness.

Featured photo credit: man watching sunrise via stokpic.com

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