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10 Scientifically-Based Ways To Raise Happy Kids

10 Scientifically-Based Ways To Raise Happy Kids

We all know the feeling–we just can’t spend enough time with our kids. We feel guilty that it is affecting their growth.

Recent good news might help ease your guilt. A new study that determined quality time with kids holds less sway than parent education and stress levels. Trying to cram in more time, especially when you’re grumpy or irritable, just isn’t the answer.

So what do you do during those times together? Here are 10 scientific tips for raising healthy, happy kids.

1. Nurture your child

Showing your children how much you love them doesn’t only nurture your relationship with them—it can help form a strong bond and contribute to a child’s ability to create lasting bonds into adulthood. Parent nurturing could be related to the size of a preschooler’s hippocampus, an area of the brain responsible for learning and memory.

Don’t underestimate the power of a kiss on the cheek. Respond to your children with emotion. Tell them you love them. Speak kindly to them.

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2. Model responsible behavior

For kids to develop into responsible, productive citizens, they must witness responsible, productive citizens. And that starts with you. Sociologists have shown that children will imitate behaviors they witness in their parents.

Be the kind of person you want your child to be. With each action or decision, ask yourself if this is how you want your child to react in the future.

3. Objectively mediate sibling conflicts

Research shows that parents who successfully mediate conflicts between siblings have children who eventually deal better with conflict.

When a conflict arises between siblings, demonstrate active listening techniques and other mediation skills.

4. Read with your kids

Reading with your kids induces healthy changes in several brain regions. These changes seem to be more prevalent when you read with your kids, not to your kids. Ask your children what they are thinking about the story or how it relates to other things they know.

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5. Create unstructured playtime

According to experts, free playtime encourages imaginative thought and problem-solving skills. They become better at asking “what if” and determining alternative solutions to difficult or complex situations.

While it can be tempting to structure every hour of the day to make sure it’s filled with important activities, don’t forget to leave open time for kids to explore and imagine.

6. Teach them to use technology wisely

Conventional wisdom used to be that face time with a screen was unhealthy for kids. In fact, several studies show that the time spent watching television can both predict and cause depression.

Not so fast, though. Technology is an integral part of today’s existence. In 2014, the Federal Communications Commission (FCC) and private companies spent nearly $3 billion on technology education because it is so necessary to participate in today’s world. Access to technology makes learning more engaging, as four out of five students said using a tablet helped them in class.

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Evolution of Tech in the Classroom - 4

    Rather than simply shutting out electronics, practice healthy habits such as setting time limits on usage and asking children what they’ve learned on their laptop or tablet that day.

    7. Be authoritative

    Parenting styles can be broken down into four major categories: authoritarian, authoritative, permissive and uninvolved. Science has consistently held that authoritative parenting—authority with communication—yields the best results.

    Don’t be afraid to put your foot down when it comes to major issues. However, in doing this, make sure you communicate your feelings and concerns, as well as why a certain behavior yields a certain consequence or punishment.

    8. Let them fail

    In today’s everyone-gets-a-trophy world, it can seem counter-cultural to allow your kids to fail when they struggle. However, failure can be an extremely important lesson. Studies show that failing actually leads to greater productivity throughout life and helps develop advanced problem solving skills.

    9. Take care of yourself

    Research demonstrates than parental stress can affect a child’s physical or mental well-being. In addition, mood disorders and perhaps even autism may be linked to parental stress, both pre- and post-childbirth.

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    Figure out what you need to maintain your happiness and sanity. If it means finding a babysitter so you can treat yourself to a movie once a week or enrolling in college classes to get a degree, taking care of yourself is critical in taking care of your child.

    10.  Teach them to share

    It’s better to give than to receive. Research shows that sharing improves a child’s disposition. For instance, toddlers who were asked to give away treats to other toddlers showed greater happiness than others.

    Start young by asking your children to share snacks with you, and share with them. Make the event a special treat so that the habit becomes natural, and always show your gratitude when they want to share.

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    Last Updated on January 18, 2019

    7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

    7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

    Some people will have a rain cloud hanging over them, no matter what the weather is outside. Their negative attitude is toxic to your own moods, and you probably feel like there is little you can do about it.

    But that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

    If you want to effectively deal with negative people and be a champion of positivity, then your best route is to take definite action through some of the steps below.

    1. Limit the time you spend with them.

    First, let’s get this out of the way. You can be more positive than a cartoon sponge, but even your enthusiasm has a chance of being afflicted by the constant negativity of a friend.

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    In fact, negativity has been proven to damage your health physically, making you vulnerable to high levels of stress and even cardiac disease. There’s no reason to get hurt because of someone else’s bad mood.

    Though this may be a little tricky depending on your situation, working to spend slightly less time around negative people will keep your own spirits from slipping as well.

    2. Speak up for yourself.

    Don’t just absorb the comments that you are being bombarded with, especially if they are about you. It’s wise to be quick to listen and slow to speak, but being too quiet can give the person the impression that you are accepting what’s being said.

    3. Don’t pretend that their behavior is “OK.”

    This is an easy trap to fall into. Point out to the person that their constant negativity isn’t a good thing. We don’t want to do this because it’s far easier to let someone sit in their woes, and we’d rather just stay out of it.

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    But if you want the best for this person, avoid giving the false impression that their negativity is normal.

    4. Don’t make their problems your problems.

    Though I consider empathy a gift, it can be a dangerous thing. When we hear the complaints of a friend or family member, we typically start to take on their burdens with them.

    This is a bad habit to get into, especially if this is a person who is almost exclusively negative. These types of people are prone to embellishing and altering a story in order to gain sympathy.

    Why else would they be sharing this with you?

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    5. Change the subject.

    When you suspect that a conversation is starting to take a turn for the negative, be a champion of positivity by changing the subject. Of course, you have to do this without ignoring what the other person said.

    Acknowledge their comment, but move the conversation forward before the euphoric pleasure gained from complaining takes hold of either of you.

    6. Talk about solutions, not problems.

    Sometimes, changing the subject isn’t an option if you want to deal with negative people, but that doesn’t mean you can’t still be positive.

    I know that when someone begins dumping complaints on me, I have a hard time knowing exactly what to say. The key is to measure your responses as solution-based.

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    You can do this by asking questions like, “Well, how could this be resolved?” or, “How do you think they feel about it?”

    Use discernment to find an appropriate response that will help your friend manage their perspectives.

    7. Leave them behind.

    Sadly, there are times when we have to move on without these friends, especially if you have exhausted your best efforts toward building a positive relationship.

    If this person is a family member, you can still have a functioning relationship with them, of course, but you may still have to limit the influence they have over your wellbeing.

    That being said, what are some steps you’ve taken to deal with negative people? Let us know in the comments.

    You may also want to read: How to Stop the Negative Spin of Thoughts, Emotions and Actions.

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