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10 Reasons Why You Should Date A Martial Artist

10 Reasons Why You Should Date A Martial Artist

Martial arts aren’t all about breaking boards and breaking arms; martial artists have also been known to break their own fair share of hearts. But don’t let that stop you, because men and women who practice martial arts offer a ton of great benefits to potential partners. Want to find out more about why your next lover should be a black belt, or at least halfway there?

1. They have high confidence levels.

People who engage in regular martial arts often carry themselves a little differently. Look at guys like Steven Seagal, Bruce Lee, or pretty much any current UFC champ and you will realize something right away: these guys are oozing with confidence. Whether you are a female or a male, there are few things more attractive than being with a person who is supremely confident that they can take care of themselves and protect those that they care about.

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2. They have small or nonexistent egos.

Arrogance is actually the result of low self-confidence and insecurity. Sure, the wanna-be tough guy walking around flexing at the gym looks “tough,” but he is probably just a scared little boy inside of a balloon suit. When a person is unsure of who they are and lacks self-confidence, they often walk around puffing out their chest, criticizing others, and acting tough in order to project an image of confidence. Someone with confidence is attractive, but someone with an ego twice the size of Texas is just about as annoying as a rock in your shoe. Ego is the false projection of confidence, and it almost always leads to bad things.

3. They are fit.

People involved in the martial arts are almost always physically fit. I know from being a competitor at some of the largest Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu competitions in the world that most of the people walking around are sporting six-packs and bulging biceps. Personally, I trained up to 6 hours a day at times, and with that much working out, you are bound to get fit in the process. Martial artists often treat their bodies like a temple and avoid things that will detract from their health. They are always active in some way or another.

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4. They are better lovers.

Not only do martial artists have better stamina from being in great shape, but people in the martial arts are often much more in touch with their bodies, more balanced, more flexible, and more in tune with the bodies and reactions of others. I am going to keep this article PG, so I will let your imagination run wild with that one for moment.

5. They have more discipline.

Martial artists not only discipline their bodies through drilling, hard exercise, and physical conditioning, but they also learn to control their minds as well. Martial artists must develop the power to force themselves to do things that are uncomfortable. They must continue to train even when they are tired, sore, or getting beaten. A true warrior of the martial way has to learn to be in control of themselves at all times, and it helps them to develop tremendous personal discipline. Are you bad with diet, budget, or setting goals? Find a martial artist. They can probably teach you a thing or two.

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6. They are better listeners.

Martial arts require a high degree of concentration and focus in order to excel at practice or competition. The same powers of concentration that allow a warrior to seize an arrow out of the air or dodge a punch will allow your new partner to listen to your problems, offer solutions, and be a shoulder to lean on in tough times.

7. They are happier people.

Have you ever wanted someone who just rolls with the punches, passes through life, and encourages you to smile all the time? A martial artist is a person who often takes things lightly, learns to exist within the flow of life, and finds joy in the small and passing moments that many of us take for granted. Who doesn’t want to date someone who is happy? More confidence, less ego, less anger, and a quiet dedication to the body and the mind: all these things make a martial artist a happier person.

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8. They are gentle and slow to anger.

The martial way is not one of violence and bloodshed, but rather one of patience, virtue, and peace. A true warrior doesn’t go around provoking fights or arguments, but avoids confrontation and fighting when possible. I don’t know about all martial artists, but I know my instructor won’t even kill a spider that walks out onto the mat, and I am the same way. I am not saying that a martial artist is someone to walk on, just that they probably are the last person that will start screaming in your face.

9. They are honest.

The martial way is one of humility, respect, and honesty. Martial artists often dedicate their lives to cultivation of their spirits, bodies, and minds, and along with these pursuits, they must learn to develop strong core values and beliefs. A person with integrity—a clear focus on what they believe and value—is much more likely to be honest than a person who has no purpose in life.

10. They are dedicated, faithful, and loyal.

Martial artists often devote their lives to those closest to them. Along with their strong values comes a strong sense of belonging and responsibility for and towards those they love and care about. A martial artist sees him or herself as a tool to protect honesty, integrity, wisdom, truth, and all things good in the world. If a lifelong practitioner of the martial arts tells you they want to be with you forever, you better believe they mean it. They will probably stick with you through fights, adversity, challenges, temptations, and anything else life can throw your way.

Featured photo credit: Fighter Portrait by Jorge Gonzalez via flickr.com

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Last Updated on December 3, 2019

10 Life Lessons You’d Better Learn Early on in Life

10 Life Lessons You’d Better Learn Early on in Life

There are so many lessons I wish I had learned while I was young enough to appreciate and apply them. The thing with wisdom, and often with life lessons in general, is that they’re learned in retrospect, long after we needed them. The good news is that other people can benefit from our experiences and the lessons we’ve learned.

Here’re 10 important life lessons you should learn early on:

1. Money Will Never Solve Your Real Problems

Money is a tool; a commodity that buys you necessities and some nice “wants,” but it is not the panacea to your problems.

There are a great many people who are living on very little, yet have wonderfully full and happy lives… and there are sadly a great many people are living on quite a lot, yet have terribly miserable lives.

Money can buy a nice home, a great car, fabulous shoes, even a bit of security and some creature comforts, but it cannot fix a broken relationship, or cure loneliness, and the “happiness” it brings is only fleeting and not the kind that really and truly matters. Happiness is not for sale. If you’re expecting the “stuff” you can buy to “make it better,” you will never be happy.

2. Pace Yourself

Often when we’re young, just beginning our adult journey we feel as though we have to do everything at once. We need to decide everything, plan out our lives, experience everything, get to the top, find true love, figure out our life’s purpose, and do it all at the same time.

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Slow down—don’t rush into things. Let your life unfold. Wait a bit to see where it takes you, and take time to weigh your options. Enjoy every bite of food, take time to look around you, let the other person finish their side of the conversation. Allow yourself time to think, to mull a bit.

Taking action is critical. Working towards your goals and making plans for the future is commendable and often very useful, but rushing full-speed ahead towards anything is a one-way ticket to burnout and a good way to miss your life as it passes you by.

3. You Can’t Please Everyone

“I don’t know the secret to success, but the secret to failure is trying to please everyone” – Bill Cosby.

You don’t need everyone to agree with you or even like you. It’s human nature to want to belong, to be liked, respected and valued, but not at the expense of your integrity and happiness. Other people cannot give you the validation you seek. That has to come from inside.

Speak up, stick to your guns, assert yourself when you need to, demand respect, stay true to your values.

4. Your Health Is Your Most Valuable Asset

Health is an invaluable treasure—always appreciate, nurture, and protect it. Good health is often wasted on the young before they have a chance to appreciate it for what it’s worth.

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We tend to take our good health for granted, because it’s just there. We don’t have to worry about it, so we don’t really pay attention to it… until we have to.

Heart disease, bone density, stroke, many cancers—the list of many largely preventable diseases is long, so take care of your health now, or you’ll regret it later on.

5. You Don’t Always Get What You Want

“Life is what happens while you’re busy making other plans.” – John Lennon

No matter how carefully you plan and how hard you work, sometimes things just don’t work out the way you want them to… and that’s okay.

We have all of these expectations; predetermined visions of what our “ideal” life will look like, but all too often, that’s not the reality of the life we end up with. Sometimes our dreams fail and sometimes we just change our minds mid-course. Sometimes we have to flop to find the right course and sometimes we just have to try a few things before we find the right direction.

6. It’s Not All About You

You are not the epicenter of the universe. It’s very difficult to view the world from a perspective outside of your own, since we are always so focused on what’s happening in our own lives. What do I have to do today? What will this mean for me, for my career, for my life? What do I want?

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It’s normal to be intensely aware of everything that’s going on in your own life, but you need to pay as much attention to what’s happening around you, and how things affect other people in the world as you do to your own life. It helps to keep things in perspective.

7. There’s No Shame in Not Knowing

No one has it all figured out. Nobody has all the answers. There’s no shame in saying “I don’t know.” Pretending to be perfect doesn’t make you perfect. It just makes you neurotic to keep up the pretense of manufactured perfection.

We have this idea that there is some kind of stigma or shame in admitting our limitations or uncertainly, but we can’t possibly know everything. We all make mistakes and mess up occasionally. We learn as we go, that’s life.

Besides—nobody likes a know-it-all. A little vulnerability makes you human and oh so much more relatable.

8. Love Is More Than a Feeling; It’s a Choice

That burst of initial exhilaration, pulse quickening love and passion does not last long. But that doesn’t mean long-lasting love is not possible.

Love is not just a feeling; it’s a choice that you make every day. We have to choose to let annoyances pass, to forgive, to be kind, to respect, to support, to be faithful.

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Relationships take work. Sometimes it’s easy and sometimes it’s incredibly hard. It is up to us to choose how we want to act, think and speak in a relationship.

9. Perspective Is a Beautiful Thing

Typically, when we’re worried or upset, it’s because we’ve lost perspective. Everything that is happening in our lives seems so big, so important, so do or die, but in the grand picture, this single hiccup often means next to nothing.

The fight we’re having, the job we didn’t get, the real or imagined slight, the unexpected need to shift course, the thing we wanted, but didn’t get. Most of it won’t matter 20, 30, 40 years from now. It’s hard to see long term when all you know is short term, but unless it’s life-threatening, let it go, and move on.

10. Don’t Take Anything for Granted

We often don’t appreciate what we have until it’s gone: that includes your health, your family and friends, your job, the money you have or think you will have tomorrow.

When you’re young, it seems that your parents will always be there, but they won’t. You think you have plenty of time to get back in touch with your old friends or spend time with new ones, but you don’t. You have the money to spend, or you think you’ll have it next month, but you might not.

Nothing in your life is not guaranteed to be there tomorrow, including those you love.

This is a hard life lesson to learn, but it may be the most important of all: Life can change in an instant. Make sure you appreciate what you have, while you still have it.

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Featured photo credit: Ben Eaton via unsplash.com

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