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9 Reasons You Can’t Resist Dating A Dreamer

9 Reasons You Can’t Resist Dating A Dreamer

Have you ever stopped to watch someone blow bubbles? These soapy bubbles are colorful and beautiful. Even though you know that all bubbles will burst in the end, you will still stop and follow each bubble to see where it goes.

Dating a dreamer is like watching bubbles float in the air. There’s something irresistible and enigmatic about dreamers that makes you stall for a moment. Why are dreamers so irresistible? Here are 9 reasons why you can’t resist dating a dreamer.

1. You can’t stop looking into their dreamy eyes.

There is something intriguing about a dreamer’s eyes. You can spend a lot of time getting lost in their eyes and still be fascinated by them. Through their beautiful eyes, you feel a deep connection with their souls, yet they still remain somewhat mysterious to you.

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2. You feel special around them.

When you date a dreamer, you finally know what it means to be special. Dreamers treat you like a prince or princess from the fairy tales. You will be loved because dreamers believe in love. Once they have decided that you are the one, they will fight for you despite all obstacles and challenges.

3. You always have surprises.

You never know what’s going on inside a dreamer’s head. They are full of surprises. Dating a dreamer means you will never have a boring date again and will soon forget what boring is. They are hopelessly romantic and they sure know how to surprise you when you least expected it. You won’t know where they will take you for a date or what they will give you next.

4. You have someone who believes in you.

Dreamers believe in the impossible. They see potential in everything, including you. If you have a dream, they will encourage and inspire you to take action. They are positive and optimistic not only towards their own dreams, but also towards yours too.

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5. You are amused by his absent-mindedness.

There is a certain cuteness and charm when dreamers get absent-minded. They might wear unmatched socks or shoes. They might search for an item that they already have with them. They might not be aware of what’s going on in their surroundings. It’s pure joy to look at them dream and live inside their own head.

6. You are dating more than one person.

Dreamers are imaginative. When you date a dreamer, it feels like you are dating more than one person. They can be naughty and fun, romantic and loving, intelligent and confident. They are everything you wish for in a partner. Dating a dreamer means you just bought a ticket to fantasy-land. You don’t get the best of both worlds. You get the best of all worlds.

7. You feel like a kid again.

Have you seen a kid fall down and cry, only to later get up on his feet and start laughing and having fun again? That’s what dating a dreamer is like. You momentarily forget what unhappiness is. Ask dreamers about their dreams, you will see a big kid with wide-opened eyes talking about his or her aspirations. Their positivity and kid-like excitement is infectious, making you feel like a kid again.

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8. You are blessed with endless creative solutions to your problems.

Dreamers may not seem to possess the conventional wisdom that people admire, but they are actually very creative and smart. In fact, with their heads in the clouds all the time, they are able to see solutions that most people normally won’t. They have visions beyond what currently exists. They also always find ways to improve your life and theirs.

9. You are dating someone who is potentially very successful.

For realists out there who think that dreamers are not worth dating because they wouldn’t be financially stable in the long run, you couldn’t be more wrong.

Yes, some dreamers never took off with their dreams. However, some of the most successful people in the world are dreamers. Walt Disney, Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, Albert Einstein, and Thomas Edison are all dreamers.

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Without dreamers, there wouldn’t be any new inventions or progress. Dreamers don’t follow the crowd. Their ideas may not be the most popular at first. However, you won’t know what you have missed if you give up on a dreamer who has ambition.

Featured photo credit: Couple / Mo Riza via flickr.com

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Last Updated on May 21, 2019

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

For all our social media bravado, we live in a society where communication is seen less as an art, and more as a perfunctory exercise. We spend so much time with people, yet we struggle with how to meaningfully communicate.

If you believe you have mastered effective communication, scan the list below and see whether you can see yourself in any of the examples:

Example 1

You are uncomfortable with a person’s actions or comments, and rather than telling the individual immediately, you sidestep the issue and attempt to move on as though the offending behavior or comment never happened.

You move on with the relationship and develop a pattern of not addressing challenging situations. Before long, the person with whom you are in relationship will say or do something that pushes you over the top and predictably, you explode or withdraw completely from the relationship.

In this example, hard-to-speak truths become never- expressed truths that turn into resentment and anger.

Example 2

You communicate from the head and without emotion. While what you communicate makes perfect sense to you, it comes across as cold because it lacks emotion.

People do not understand what motivates you to say what you say, and without sharing your feelings and emotions, others experience you as rude, cold or aggressive.

You will know this is a problem if people shy away from you, ignore your contributions in meetings or tell you your words hurt. You can also know you struggle in this area if you find yourself constantly apologizing for things you have said.

Example 3

You have an issue with one person, but you communicate your problem to an entirely different person.

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The person in whom you confide lacks the authority to resolve the matter troubling you, and while you have vented and expressed frustration, the underlying challenge is unresolved.

Example 4

You grew up in a family with destructive communication habits and those habits play out in your current relationships.

Because you have never stopped to ask why you communicate the way you do and whether your communication style still works, you may lack understanding of how your words impact others and how to implement positive change.

If you find yourself in any of the situations described above, this article is for you.

Communication can build or decimate worlds and it is important we get it right. Regardless of your professional aspirations or personal goals, you can improve your communication skills if you:

  • Understand your own communication style
  • Tailor your style depending on the needs of the audience
  • Communicate with precision and care
  • Be mindful of your delivery, timing and messenger

1. Understand Your Communication Style

To communicate effectively, you must understand the communication legacy passed down from our parents, grandparents or caregivers. Each of us grew up with spoken and unspoken rules about communication.

In some families, direct communication is practiced and honored. In other families, family members are encouraged to shy away from difficult conversations. Some families appreciate open and frank dialogue and others do not. Other families practice silence about substantive matters, that is, they seldom or rarely broach difficult conversations at all.

Before you can appreciate the nuance required in communication, it helps to know the familial patterns you grew up with.

2. Learn Others Communication Styles

Communicating effectively requires you to take a step back, assess the intended recipient of your communication and think through how the individual prefers to be communicated with. Once you know this, you can tailor your message in a way that increases the likelihood of being heard. This also prevents you from assuming the way you communicate with one group is appropriate or right for all groups or people.

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If you are unsure how to determine the styles of the groups or persons with whom you are interacting, you can always ask them:

“How do you prefer to receive information?”

This approach requires listening, both to what the individuals say as well as what is unspoken. Virgin Group CEO Richard Branson noted that the best communicators are also great listeners.

To communicate effectively from relationship to relationship and situation to situation, you must understand the communication needs of others.

3. Exercise Precision and Care

A recent engagement underscored for me the importance of exercising care when communicating.

On a recent trip to Ohio, I decided to meet up with an old friend to go for a walk. As we strolled through the soccer park, my friend gently announced that he had something to talk about, he was upset with me. His introduction to the problem allowed me to mentally shift gears and prepare for the conversation.

Shortly after introducing the shift in conversation, my friend asked me why I didn’t invite him to the launch party for my business. He lives in Ohio and I live in the D.C. area.

I explained that the event snuck up on me, and I only started planning the invite list three weeks before the event. Due to the last-minute nature of the gathering, I opted to invite people in the DMV area versus my friends from outside the area – I didn’t want to be disrespectful by asking them to travel on such short notice.

I also noted that I didn’t want to be disappointed if he and others declined to come to the event. So I played it safe in terms of inviting people who were local.

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In the moment, I felt the conversation went very well. I also checked in with my friend a few days after our walk, affirmed my appreciation for his willingness to communicate his upset and our ability to work through it.

The way this conversation unfolded exemplified effective communication. My friend approached me with grace and vulnerability. He approached me with a level of curiosity that didn’t put me on my heels — I was able to really listen to what he was saying, apologize for how my decision impacted him and vow that going forward, I would always ask rather than making decisions for him and others.

Our relationship is intact, and I now have information that will help me become a better friend to him and others.

4. Be Mindful of Delivery, Timing and Messenger

Communicating effectively also requires thinking through the delivery of the message one intends to communicate as well as the appropriate time for the discussion.

In an Entrepreneur.com column, VIP Contributor Deep Patel, noted that persons interested in communicating well need to master the art of timing. Patel noted,[1]

“Great comedians, like all great communicators, are able to feel out their audience to determine when to move on to a new topic or when to reiterate an idea.”

Communicating effectively also requires thoughtfulness about the messenger. A person prone to dramatic, angry outbursts should never be called upon to deliver constructive feedback, especially to people whom they do not know. The immediate aftermath of a mass shooting is not the ideal time to talk about the importance of the Second Amendment rights.

Like everyone else, I must work to ensure my communication is layered with precision and care.

It requires precision because words must be carefully tailored to the person with whom you are speaking.

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It requires intentionality because before one communicates, one should think about the audience and what the audience needs in order to hear your message the way you intended it to be communicated.

It requires active listening which is about hearing verbal and nonverbal messages.

Even though we may be right in what we say, how we say it could derail the impact of the message and the other parties’ ability to hear the message.

Communicating with care is also about saying things that the people in our life need to hear and doing so with love.

The Bottom Line

When I left the meeting with my dear friend, I wondered if I was replicating or modeling this level of openness and transparency in the rest of my relationships.

I was intrigued and appreciative. He’d clearly thought about what he wanted to say to me, picked the appropriate time to share his feedback and then delivered it with care. He hit the ball out of the park and I’m hopeful we all do the same.

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Featured photo credit: Kenan Buhic via unsplash.com

Reference

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